Maxine Peake [2]

Maxine Peake. Why?

“It’s about 10 minutes into our conversation that Maxine Peake first calls for the destruction of capitalism. “We’ve got to save humanity,” says the venerated actor and activist, who in her youth was a card-carrying communist. “We’re being ruled by capitalist, fascist dictators. It’s entrenched, isn’t it? We’ve got to the point where protecting capital is much more important than anybody’s life. How do we dig out of that? How do we change?”

That’s enough for me.

Nominated by: Sixdog Vomit

Newspaper websites

If you’re foolish enough to go on websites run by the likes of the Daily Mirror or Daily Mail, you may also be familiar with having to press ‘Ctrl+Alt+Delete’ whenever you try to navigate their site. Ad blockers? About as much use as a vegetarian restaurant in Wuhan.

Yes, I now ignore any links to most newspaper websites due to the amount of utter shit and spyware they’re infested with. You can get videos auto playing, the screen freezing as you try to scroll the page down or indeed, just the plain old frozen screen that can crash your fucking computer.

‘We see you’re using an adblocker’. Yes, to stop cunts like you shoving spyware onto my computer or just throwing on auto play videos over what I’m trying to read. No, don’t make the mistake of turning off your adblocker, just to get access. Not unless you want to see what using a ZX81 to access the internet would be like.

Calling themselves ‘news websites’ should be a matter for Trading Standards. They’re virus, spyware and pop-up advert sites,

Fuck off.

Nominated by: Cuntybollocks

Paradigm Precision

Paradigm Precision Burnley.

A random one but this is the company who have just sacked Jake Hepple – the sulphur smelling satanic monster who dared to engage in free speech by arranging for a banner to be flown over the Etihad stadium which said “white lives matter Burnley”.

The Daily Mule, sorry, Mail have gone all out (in line with all the rest of the media) to portray this man as someone Hitler and Stalin would be embarrassed by for his radical views – showing pictures of this beast committing such heinous crimes as standing behind an England flag. (Clear evidence of racism then).

Mr Hepple got the inevitable visit from the Police (always got time for that one haven’t they?) who informed him he had done nothing wrong, had committed no crime whatsoever and asked him if he wanted protection – would this have happened if the banner had said “black lives matter Burnley”? No, I don’t think so either – and ask yourself this – do we really live in a democracy when a Man gets sacked, demonised, threatened, abused and pretty much has his life ruined for doing NOTHING WRONG.

And the cherry on the hate cake? His partner has also been sacked for writing “paki” on facebook. People from Britain are called “Brits” all around the World but this is not racist, but calling someone from Pakistan a paki apparently is – racism in itself.
I despair – this is 1930’s Germany, not the Country I grew up in – and we are slowly being exterminated every way, every day just as the Jews were by Hitler – all the parallels are there. And darkness awaits.

Nominated by: Vernon Fox

Piles (2)

Don’t continue reading if you’re about to eat! – admin

I’ve been suffering big time lately with my Plymouth’s.

Every time I wipe my arse, it looks like the Japanese flag or even worse, the Chinese.

Having to push the fucking things back up your ring. Shoving the suppository up waiting for suction to do the rest. Delightful. The fuckers even wake me up in the middle of the night, throbbing like a thumb hit with a hammer. I’m actually walking like John Wayne if HE had piles.

Oh for the bliss of a clean nip after a shit, one wipe and all done.

Piles are a pile of cunt.

Nominated by: Bob Frapples

Charlie Zelenoff – Champ or Chump?

With apologies to Admin, because when I first cunted this cunt I was a drunk cunt, but now I am (briefly) a sober cunt, so I shall attempt to cunt again the cunt known as…

CHARLIE ZELENOFF

Who is Charlie Zelenoff you might ask?

Why, he is nothing other than the bulb-headed, weak-chined, noodle-necked, slump-shouldered, sunken-chested, self-proclaimed Boxing Champion of the Whole Wide World!

What he is in actual fact is a wretched drunken hobgoblin of a man that periodically emerges from his mother’s condominium in LA to assault total strangers on the street and record these ‘fights’ on YouTube as professional boxing ‘wins’.

When innocent passers-by are in short supply, he will harass real boxers on social media in an attempt to provoke them into the ring, and is willing to make death threats against a disabled child if he thinks it will get a response (as indeed it did in the case of Deontay Wilder and his daughter).

When all else fails, he will simply order a pizza and then sucker-punch the elderly delivery guy.

He also believes Kim Kardashian is madly in love with him.

The cunt.

Nominated by: Chimp Licker