This nom is a bit different from the norm in that I want to focus on those annoying little things that piss me off on a daily basis. Things like:-
- Cash Machines being out of order when you need cash in a hurry.
- Shoe laces that either come undone at the most inconvenient of times, or get knotted when you try to undo them.
- Batteries in remote controls that die on you and you’ve got no spares.
- Cunts from Amazon who send you something small and harmless like a flash drive, but decide to pack it in a cardboard box the size of a shoebox, full to the brim with millions of polystyrene chips that go all over the fucking place as soon as you open the lid!
- Tinned food that don’t have ring-pulls, and you don’t have a can opener.
- Dust.
- Grubby/sticky tables in pubs that haven’t been wiped down properly.
- Blobs of butter in the jam/marmalade jar because some cunt couldn’t be bothered to clean the knife beforehand.
- No toilet roll in the gents bogs in restaurants (but only noticing after the event!)
- Unscrewing something, but there’s always ONE screw that won’t fucking budge!
- Postmen who don’t shove letters fully through the letter box thus resulting in soggy letters due to rain.
- Electrical fuses that go pop and finding you have every spare fuse under the sun other than for the amperage you need.
- Waiting at bus queues and some cunt tries to start a conversation about the bleedin’ weather! (Always, always ALWAYS the weather, and not something more edgy like Owen Jones being a complete cunt?)
- BST & GMT – fucking about changing the clocks (and there’s always one you forget).
- Website forums that pick up on your spelling and insist on correcting you with the American spelling of the word.
- Dropping the TV remote control or your phone while your nice and comfy in your chair, and the remote is always just slightly out of easy reach.
- Dropping a £1 coin, which always seems to roll into inaccessible/awkward places.
- Shaving every day.
- Condensation on your glasses when you walk into a takeaway on a cold night.
- Long lists of pointless shite…..
Any more you would like to add?
Nominated by: Technocunt
Trying to dodge millions of umbrella-carrying-cunts down the high street without getting poked in the eyes!
Cunts who shake their wet umbrella on my doorstep, but then bring it inside and prop it up against the wall on my hall carpet.
The missus, who sings out loud while listening to music via a pair of bluetooth headphones Which means I can’t hear the music other than her voice sounding like a wailing banshee on acid.
4
Cunts that sit at the lights and then turn on their indicators to turn right as soon as the lights go green. Cunts.
Millenials who keep banging on about how they will never be able to afford a house. Well stop spending £10 on lunch in M&S, having a £50 a month phone contract and driving around in a lease BMW. Twats
1
Just thought of another one, TV channel hopping, always land on a commercial break, usually at the start and it goes on for at least five minutes.
2
You dopy cunt.
Has it never occurred to you that when you change channels because of adverts – it just might be on the hour – when every channel has adverts for the next 5 minutes?
0
Take care Xeno, newcomer. You don’t call established cunters a cunt.
3
Railway passengers who ask “what are the times to (place name here)?” And my reply is “on the hour, every hour” and the useless, nomark, brainless fucking cunts then say “ can you write it down?” Fucking fucking fucking cunts.
0