The nomination of such a non entity, unfortunately automatically requires me to battle severe acid reflux for the next few hours. But the acknowledgement of such a wet unnoticeable fart needs to be had.

This, nothing. Sorry, I mean “comedian”, decides to pipe up and provide us plebs with a voice that no one gives a thrupney bit over, and has declared that he’s sick of George cross’s and finds it wascist.

I’m what would be classed as a millennial. Late 30’s. Tarnished with the small sticky brush of shite. But I can accurately say, that 95% of people my age or under, haven’t a fucking clue as to who “Alan” is. Those that do remember him vaguely from Jonathan creek, a show no one watched and no one to this day has any idea what it was about other than the name being in our consciousness because tv was so shit then you couldn’t escape to the internet and streaming. So those poor souls are confused to seizures as to when he was ever funny or relevant….

So, “Alan” you floppy haired, non entity that seems to be so desperate to remain in the pulse of things he has to come out with such vitriolic shite. I say to you; just fuck off you unfunny side show bob looking twat, and if you want to comment on current affairs may I suggest you move from your 4 bed cunt cube in a gated community to somewhere a bit more ethnically enriched you floppy haired non entity shit cunt

The Telegraph Link

Nominated by: Inspector Grobbler

Additional link provided by PT Admin:

The English Chronicle Link

are a cunt.

Another scam exposed,

Death threats for sale from the Taliban, yes £40 (very special offer for you sir) will get you a sick note that is admissible in an asylum claim.

telegraph

Fucking corrupt goat shagging cunts, it probably has a requirement to send benefits back home in the terms and conditions too.
Why the fuck are we even entertaining this? I spoke to an expat who has moved too Turkey, he is briming with enthusiasm for the place, such nice people ect so how does that work out.
Well my thoughts are all this dross paddling across the channel miss behave at home and are not made welcome there, hence their persecution at the hands of their own countrymen so why on earth are we creating a luxury exile for them.

Nomination by Lord Benny.

Just when you think this country can’t get any worse……

On the day that a piece of filthy Sudanese ‘asylum seeker’ shit is convicted of the brutal murder of a young mother by following her onto a deserted station platform at 11pm then stabbing her 23 times with a screwdriver, we get this.

What an absolute fucking farce. The illegal Ethiopian immo convicted of the sexual assault of a child and the cause of all the trouble at the Bell Hotel in Epping gets released from prison ‘by mistake’. What the absolute fuck? And 262 other criminals were released from chokey ‘by mistake’ in the last year. Don’t they check the person’s identity before they let them out?

As I write this 24 hours after the debacle the cunt is still on the run.

Just the latest national embarrassment to add to all the others from our inept, shambolic Government and State.

bbcnews

Nominated by Geordie Twatt.

Seconded by Unkle Terry

bbcnews

My memory isn’t quite what it was so I may have cunted this vile piece of arficunt shit recently but the crime is so disgusting yet not unusual in Modern Britain that it deserves to command our attention.

This cunt should die by being fed to wolves.

are a cunt.

Given a nice near free rental property from a UK council, but ideally that’s not good enough and you want to buy your own property but don’t have the money?

Well, this Afghan raggie has come up with a plan. Already in a grace and favour council property courtesy of the British tax payer, this woman has used the death of her son as a fund raising device so she can buy said property so she can bury her son in the garden so they ‘can all be together again’

Cynical…..me??? Yes, of course I fucking am. Can’t be arsed to walk the 50 minutes to the cemetry where her son is…..note work commitments are never mentioned, so to her it’s 50 minutes lost watching shite day time tv or queuing up for benefits. Apparently she ‘has to walk as she is ‘scared of cars and vehicles generally’ (nice one, got out of that scrutiny didn’t you?) So her suggestion is gullible cunts donate to her, so she can buy the council house she’s currently living it.

Nice scam….how long did that take you to work out, eh? Already so dozy cunts have donated around £1600.00 (bet they’ll never see that back once she’s closed the fund raising account after its failed (hopefully)

I don’t beleive a word of what she says, and is just using her son as an emotional lever to get money…and a house.

To make it even more grinding, is she has been quoted as saying although her son was born in the UK, he fely he was an Afghan due to his fathers heritage (note…father not around in story) Well, my friends if he considers he is Afghan despite having been given aneducation, health care a relatively safe way of life, and a subsidised house to live in is not good enough and you prefer that flyblown shithole, my I suggest you and your sons body fuck off back there and start digging a large hold in the sand, you scamming ungrateful cunt.

Here’s the link (sorry, it’s the Daily Mirror- yest, I know- but it’s on my local rags website and it’s paywalled. This was the only one what isn’t)

Mirror

Nominated by Chuff Chugger, alias the wino C.A.

is a cunt.

facebook

Apparently, 2TK has made much of the fact that no dinghies crossed the Chanel over the weekend just passed.
That would be the 4th and 5th of October.

He says, allegedly, that this is proof that Shabbana Mahmoods policies are working.

Does he think we are simpletons?
That we didn’t notice that Storm Amy prevented the launching of so much as a letter in a bottle, much less a dinghy over the weekend?

Or is he implying that Shabbana can somehow control the weather at will?

I honestly didn’t think it was possible for him to sink any lower, but there you go.

Please note, although I have searched extensively for a media report, even one that has denied this, the link above is all I have been able to find.

Nominated by Jeezum Priest