Feeding yourself without food waste is a cunt and virtually impossible, if you’re single.

Daily Fail.

I live alone, have done for over 10 years, and like a lot of older people, my appetite has diminished.

Eating healthy is really hard. What are supposed to be single portions are too much for me.
Ready prep meals for one are so tasteless without a ton of salt and Hendos, they defeat the object!

I try not to waste food, after all I’m a pensioner on a fixed income, but why can’t supermarkets do a reasonably priced bag of veg for one? You know, three baby spuds, florets of cauli, half a peeled carrot?

And don’t give me shite about frozen veg, lettuce doesn’t freeze!
(and has the nutritional value of air – NA)

Nominated by : Jeezum Priest

Cunters will be well aware of the furore caused when the BBC recently aired a *cough* ‘documentary’ about Gaza, which turned out to have been narrated by the son of a Hamas government minister.

Enter stage left one Deborah Turness, CEO of News and Current Affairs at al-Beebra, who recently ‘earned’ a hefty payrise to take her salary north of £430k a year. In a transparent attempt to cast a veneer of impartiality over the documentary and justify it being aired, Thickness stated ‘it’s really important that we are clear that Abdullah’s father is a deputy agriculture minister, a member of the Hamas-run government. I think it’s important to continually remind people of the difference’. Ah, so there’s a distinction to be drawn between that worthy organisation’s ‘military’ and ‘political’ wings then. Good show, and thanks for pointing that out.

Well here’s the thing Debs. It may have escaped your attention but Hamas as an organisation is proscribed by the UK government as a terrorist organisation IN ITS ENTIRETY, military wing and political wings both. As William James put it, ‘a difference which makes no difference is no difference at all’. Abdullah’s dear dad didn’t get to be a senior official of Hamas by virtue of being one of the good guys, bent on a policy of peace and reconciliation and growing stuff. It’s like saying that Hitler and Goebbels were a couple of okay guys you’d have a pint with because they were head of the Nazi party’s political wing.

This is a blatant attempt by Turness to excuse the BBC’s lack of editorial rigour, or indeed what may well be deliberate bias, by trying to draw a meaningful distinction where none actually exists. To this day, al-Beeb still refuses to refer to Hamas as a terrorist organisation. I draw my own conclusion from this with regard to Mzzzz Turness and the Beeb, as you no doubt will draw yours.

telegraph

Nominated by Ron Knee.

Security guards on supermarket doors are cunts, aren’t they.

Twenty years ago, there were no guards outside shops or lurking at the entrance, eyeballing you as you entered like you’re a dirty shoplifter. It began about a decade ago.

Do they prevent much crime?
If Jamal and his mates want to go nicking, will this podgy bloke in a white shirt make any difference? When chavs make a five-finger discount from the booze section, is this bored chubster going to make chase?

Mostly, these portly Afreekans don’t look like they could even walk 100 yards, let alone run it. They saunter round the shop like overfed ducks, usually browsing on their mobile. Once, I saw one tucked away in a corner watching the football on his phone. It reminds of that quote in Snatch: “I thought you said he was the getaway driver. What the fuck can he getaway from?” (Certainly not a buffet – NA)

I suppose the supermarkets just add the cost of these do-nothings to their items making groceries even more expensive.

Fucking useless.

Nominated by : Captain Magnanimous

Link to the header pic provided by Sam Beau who added the following:
@ADMIN – perhaps I can be a professional link-adder? How much does that pay?
Be my guest, SB. You’d be on the same rate as us Admins….fuck all – NA.

Now they are not all cunts, but really.
I am beginning to believe that the industrial revolution is a hoax, and the large cities and towns were in fact built by aliens.
I base this opinion on my experience of supplying the building industry with tools and materials for a good few decade’s.
So where do I start.

Planning, do they plan do they fuck almost the day before they start, they order the materials to build said dwelling and expect next day delivery.
Planning again! We deliver 5 tons of building sand and the next thing you know, they need more immediately, now you would imagine that as the pile decreased and the building did not enlarge, they would think to order more before they scraped of the ground and decided that they needed more sand.
Specials, now these are bespoke products that have been made for you…no one else, you gave the quantities and specs, and they have been made for you! We won’t buy them back they are yours, so you fuck up it’s your problem, whether it be a door a window a roof tile or a sodding radiator!

Work ethic now today we were forecast rain, we did have rain, the equivalent to a greenhouse mister! Have I seen a builder? Have I fuck, there is sodding tumbleweed blowing round the yard!
Its either to hot, to wet, to cold hence my belief that aliens may have in fact caused the industrial revolution.
Lastly pricing, now I live local, I live in a council flat and have an old, fucked Volvo and yes when I walk the dog by the posh pubs, I see them in there with their £6 pints and their range rovers.
Even more annoying is their fucking costa coffee mugs when they turn up in the shop, quite happy to buy overpriced coffee but will quibble the price of every screw or brick they want to buy.
Any way someone has fucked the economy and I am seeing more DIY ers than builders so the general public are busy breaking their most high value purchases right now, so they will be busy in a few years time.

Daily Fail

Nominated by Lord Benny Link by Sam Beau.