Love/Hate relationships

Besides my slight tendency to be drawn towards nominating Greta Thundercunt, I always try and nominate things that are a little leftfield and obscure, Today I nominate love / hate relationships to generate a bit of conversation.

I could focus on my ex, working for money, many things. But no, I shall focus this entirely in Buckfast tonic wine although eating stupidly hot curries, preferably for money comes a close second, Give me a “challenge” where its free for finishing it or even better, A prize, I’m all in to suffer the next day consequences.

Back to Buckfast. I don’t especially like the taste, I really don’t like the unique form of hangover it provides and I especially don’t like the culture associated with it (I’m a very peaceful drunk).

But without fail, I can’t help myself when shopping if I know I will be drinking, It sets a drinking day off very well, A bizzare caffeine fuelled tipsy that no other drink is even slightly capable of providing, Almost impossible to describe but after over 20 years of drinking the stuff, its very much a love / hate relationship. Drink a 2nd bottle at your own risk, A third and the game is over for the next day.

deadlinenews

Nominated by Cunt of the Isles.

Chavs and Phone Zombies at Funerals


The usual mongs have turned out for Ricky Hatton’s funeral.

Cunts in Manchester City shirts and waving City flags (what is it with these blue bastards?). Anyone with a shred of decency and respect wears black at a funeral.

Also – surprise surprise – there are even some Liverpool shirts in there. Might have known they’d be in there griefjacking. Like leeches on a big fat blood filled arse.

Yes, the lad was a huge City supporter. But at his funeral?! Shouldn’t heads be bowed silently as a mark of respect (a la Churchill and his send off)? Waving flags like its a day out at the Cup Final? Fuck off. What’s next? Sparklers? Whirly Gig Windwills? This is a funeral, Not a sodding carnival.

And, naturally, there are hordes of shitheads holding up their phones, ‘filming’ the procession. And, of course, these fuckers will be boasting about it on social media and bastard Tik Tok.

This is Dianafication for chavs and riff raff. Complete and utter cunts of the highest order.

BBC News Link

Nominated by: Norman

Maiwand Banashee


Maiwand Banashee is a cunt.

Yet another terrorist who exploited the hopelessly idiotic “asylum system” to live in Britain despite being a member of the fucking Taliban and a prospective suicide bomber.

Please avail yourself of this wonderfully uplifting sob story courtesy,as ever,of Our BBC..

BBC News Link

The mind boggles quite frankly.

The naivety and mindless form filling bureaucracy that allows such trash into our country is totally beyond redemption.

What a mud hut of vile cunts.

Oven.

Nominated by: Unkle Terry

Lenny Henry [12]


Lenny Henry isn’t funny, he isn’t a comedian, but he is a great big Cunt.

This man for whom Dawn French plays the part of person-of-colour [edit PT Admin] socket has jumped on the reparations bandwagon demanding that Great Britain pays reparations to the black population of this country.

He claims that [blacks] “personally deserve money for the effects of slavery”. I’d say that he and the BBC should pay the Anglo-Saxon natives of this country for having to endure his drivel masquerading as comedy. His impersonations of the magnificent David Bellamy were worse than being entombed in Katie Price’s fanny.

I’d say that the biggest mistake in history was the failure of the local lions to eat his ancestors.

Telegraph Link

Nominated by: Hard Brexit Cunt

Seconded by: Ron Knee

Someone will no doubt correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe that Sir Lenworth of Henry was once charged with impersonating a comedian for financial gain, although the case never came to court. Well he’s always been as funny as a kidney stone, and he’s certainly not about to start getting any laughs now if his latest efforts are anything to go by.

Apparently the lad sees all the inequities and injustices which he perceives to have been heaped upon black people as ‘all being down to the transatlantic slave trade’. Consequently, he wants Britain to pay out a breath-taking £18 trillion in reparations to black people, ‘because we deserve it’.

Erm, no you don’t. The notion that cases full of money should be handed over by people who’ve never owned slaves to people who’ve never been slaves is simply ludicrous. On that basis, almost anybody anywhere could claim that they were due reparations because their forefathers were once held in bondage by somebody or other. Come on you Greeks and Italians and Moors and sub-Saharan Africans,
pony up and get the gravy train rolling.

Stop it already with the ridiculous assertions you twat. It’s as if you’re actually courting controversy for the publicity, like as though you’ve got a book to sell or something…

GB News Link

And a third by: Lord_of_the_Rings

Ron, just for my own edification, and those mathematically challenged amongst our ranks, I would just like to clarify the level of reparations that Loony Lenny is calling for :-

£18,000,000,000,000 (18 Trillion or 18 Thousand Billion) Pounds

That is just 0.4 Trillion shy of the combined GDP of UK, Germany, France, Italy and Japan (18.4 Trillion) – and a touch under Chinas 19.2 Trillion GDP.

Maybe Lenny can stick to being as funny as face Cancer and smelling of wee

With a final forth by: Paul Maskinback

My endorsement of Hard Brexit’s wonderful cunting of that simpering, thick as a castle-wall, irritating Brummie person-of-colour [edit PT Admin].

Firstly, where does this clueless, talentless, tinted cunt thinks £18 trillion is going to come from, given out free with buckets of KFC?

£18 trillion is a phenomenal amount of money and even if the government could raise it (which they probably couldn’t), hasn’t he given any thought that it will leave no money to run and maintain the UK, which would then turn into a lawless, wrecked, festering shithole? Perhaps that is his plan – make his fellow bunnies rich whilst they bask in reflection of the Congo-esque mess that they have made of this country.

And what about his ex, poor dawn-babes. She won’t have a spare couple of pound in her pockets to console herself with a bar or two of chocolate.

Fuck off Lenny, you bleck cunt and stick to bringing down ceilings in Premier Inn hotel rooms when you land your fat carcass on the bed in the room above.

Ignorant groid.

The Walker Art Gallery in Liverpool


‘Hello sailor!’

‘Oooooooo…get ‘er!’

There’s a long and honourable tradition of claiming that historical figures belong to some fashionable minority. Cleopatra was black, Florence Nightingdale was a tuppence licker, Hitler only had one ball… you know the sort of thing I mean.

Now there’s the case of Admiral Lord Nelson, who was mortally wounded as the Royal Navy blew the arses off the French and Spanish fleets at the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805. As Nelson lay dying aboard HMS Victory, he is reputed to have said to his said to his friend Captain Thomas Hardy ‘kiss me Hardy’.

Based on this, the Walker Art Gallery in Liverpool has branded our boy Horatio as ‘queer’, and has placed two paintings of his death in an exhibition entitled ‘On the History of LGBTQ and Love’. Apparently the museum’s curators have stated that ‘historians have long speculated about the exact nature of the relationship’ between Nelson and Hardy, and that their friendship and bond could represent ‘the sometimes hidden queer history of life at sea’. Sounds as though life at sea could have had its, shall we say, gay side back in those days; all ‘rum, bum and concertina’, as George Melly put it in his autobiography.

Now as we know, Nelson was married to Frances Nelson, but was also getting plenty on the side from Lady Emma Hamilton, who bore the saucy sailor a child. Nevertheless, those vital three words reputedly spoken by Nelson as his life ebbed away must surely be taken as conclusive evidence that he did, in fact, secretly bat for the other side.

I don’t know about anybody else, but I for one think that we owe a tremendous debt of gratitude to the Walker Gallery for bringing a new and fascinating insight into the life of one of our greatest national figures.

Who and what next I wonder? ‘Margaret Thatcher was a man!’ claims controversial historian…

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15168477/Lord-Nelson-gay-leading-gallery-says-years-speculation-hero-admirals-words.html

Nominated by: Ron Knee