There’s good news and bad news on the electioneering front, fellow cunters.

The good news is that Zippy clone Caroline Lucas, the UK’s only Green Party MP, is standing down at the next election. The bad news is that Eddie ‘you can call me Suzy, big boy’ Izzard is looking to be chosen as Labour’s candidate for the Brighton constituency.

I can see him/her/they/it whatever actually been selected. I mean, what better way for Labour to secure the seat (no pun intended) than to parachute a self-promoting transvestite big girl’s blouse into the constituency? This is Brighton we’re taking about.

And if Izzard does gain the seat at the election, it’ll sprinkle a bit of real Labour stardust and excitement around the House of Commons. Will he turn up in a suit or will she turn up in a skirt and fishnet stockings to raise an environmental issue at PM’s Questions? There’s that real ‘celebrity’ glamour factor to bring into play here. A front bench seat is guaranteed in next to no time.

Go for it Labour. You know it makes sense.

The Argus

Nominated by: Ron Knee

I like to spend some time every day keeping up with what’s going on in the world, and look at a number of sources to that end.

I’ll check ‘The Mail’, ‘The Mirror’, ‘The Express’, ‘The Scotsman’ and ‘The Glasgow Herald’, plus other papers from around the world. I’ll also look in on ‘GBNews’ and ‘TalkTV’ and ‘Fox Australia’, but avoid BBCunts like a dose of the clap.

Recently, I thought I’d go to ‘LBC’ for a bit of a change, and so doing, chanced upon some whining cunt by the name of James O’Brien, and soon found myself wishing that I hadn’t.

Jeez, what a morose moaner this knob is. His whole demeanour is of someone who’s found a tanner but lost a tenner, or who’s just found his beloved pet hamster cold and rigid inside his exercise wheel.

After about half an hour listening to this twat croaking on, I decided that enough was more than enough, and switched to ‘TalkTv’ in search of a glimpse of Julia Hartley-Brewer’s awesome décolletage to restore my good humour.

Talk about dragging despondency and miserabilism to new depths. What a sullen, bitter and sulky cunt.

YouTube

Nominated by: Ron Knee

And seconded by: Herman Jelmet

I’d like to second this nom.

There are very few cunts I genuinely despise, more than James O’Brien.

He’s nothing but a forked tongued, disingenuous, bedwetting, lefty, Brexit hating wanker.

You know the type – doesn’t see any problems with boatloads of men in dinghies washing up on the UK coastline illegally each day.

Calls you a racist for not being happy about it.

Lives in an almost exclusively white part of the country but still calls you a racist.

Can’t or refuses to get over the Brexit referendum result.

Mainly talks down to, sneers and hits the mute button at anybody who is stupid enough to phone into his crappy LBC show.

Just a thoroughbred cunt basically.

A couple of week back, I found this little snippet of the twat being disingenuous yet again over Dame Kweer Bendy Knee Charmer removing his poppy so he could pander to the peaceful element of the Labour Party.

It appears that Dame Kweer did indeed remove his poppy as it appeared to be on the same day and the constipated looking shit house cunt was wearing what looked like the same suit jacket.

Poppy on one minute then poppy off the next.

Despite this strangely spineless pandering by the future PM (God help us all) our James thinks it’s nothing but a fabrication by the far right.

What a pair of cunts.

YouTube 2

I first noticed this during the pandemic, when lockdown forced me to buy odds and ends online stuff like gardening gloves, wire, plastic food containers, some art supplies/stationery.

Now it seems to have blown up to endemic proportions. Half the more generic stuff on there seems to be Chinese, even crayons for the niece.

I’m afraid to buy toys for her on Amazon now; broken colostomy bags repurposed as plush toys, filled with polystyrene beads and some moribund Chinaman’s pink and grey phlegm.

Something scooped from the beach in Macau and repainted to resemble a turtle with lead paint.

Seriously, I think we’ve had just about enough rubbish exported from that country over the past few years, especially those little sacks of fat, starch and genetic material made in Wuhan.

(I’m not Martin)

Cherrypicks Reviews

Nominated by: Cuntamus Prime

 
We all know the three Rs, reading, writing and wiping…what?.. hang on. Yes arse wiping is on the school curriculum courtesy of lazy self-entitled parents who now think it is the responsibility of teachers to toilet train their kids because of their busy lives.

They probably think since schools feed the little fuckers with breakfast clubs and free school meals in the holidays why shouldn’t you change a few nappies? It should be pointed out some of these are six year olds, not toddlers…its just another manifestation of thinking that the state should provide for everything without any personal responsibility. Toilet train your own child? How fucking dare you!

The poor teachers, I bet you thought it was all six week holidays and drag queen story hour. You won’t be reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory the same way again either. Its not going to leave much time for indoctrinating young minds with the denial of biological sex and lectures on white guilt and climate change while they help the incontinently challenged with their poo times table.

“Children are the world’s most valuable resource and its best hope for the future” said John F. Kennedy.

Well lets get them out of nappies first hmm?

The Sun

Nominated by Liberal Liquidator.

 
Dentists are money grabbing cunts.

I have had toothache for several days, I made an emergency appointment for today. You have a choice of a root canal filling or an extraction.

I went for the extraction in for under thirty minutes came out to settle up £200 please. Fuck me crossways says I £400 per hour? Fucking nice work if you can get it.

Sorry there is no link admin, it’s a personal experience.

Nominated by Cunty Mort and seconded below by Miserable Northern Cunt.

God yeah.
I hate the dentist too.
I second this nom?

they are preachy nosey bastard’s,

do you smoke?
” just crack”

do you eat chocolate?
” like Vanessa feltz pal”

you’ve not been flossing have you?
you know I haven’t.
this a trick or something?

they put you through agony then pick your pocket☹️

Daily Fail