Communists, tut. Never happy are they?

Back in 1948 the British army was involved in the Malaya Emergency.

A uprising by communists were attacking rubber plantations and being a bit of a nuisance. So we sent in the army.

Now Malaya is dense jungle. So we hired some Iban guides from Borneo. We’d used them before against the Japanese.

Now the Iban are charming people. Affable, friendly, polite. But also happen to be head hunters.

Now our ancestors, the ancient Britons were also headhunters. Reason the Romans used us as auxiliary troops. Now the Iban started taking the heads of Malayan communists. The Royal marines joined in and everyone was having a splendid time.

’til the Daily Worker newspaper found out. They published a photo:

Image.

The government denied it. So the communist paper printed more. Eventually Winston Churchill had to come out and admit it was true. And playing with severed heads from now on wasn’t funny.

The Iban carried on chopping commie heads off. It’s what they do!

But shame on the Marxists at the Daily Worker for trying to stop a tribal custom by people in a third world country.

They really are scum.

A link!

WW2 Talk.com

I’d forget my head if it wasn’t screwed on.

Nominated by : Miserable northern cunt

is a cunt

*Newsflash 5th Sept.2024*

“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Royal Correspondent Ron Knee bringing you some astonishing breaking news concerning Prince Harry.

As we all know, Harry is sublimely happy with his Stepford Wife and his life in Monteshitshow, but ever dutiful, he has graciously condescended to consider ‘helping out’ with royal duties temporarily if asked to by the king.

There remains one huge stumbling block to Harry’s return to the fold however. Sources indicate that he will only put himself out if he receives an apology from his estranged brother Prince William.

When appraised of his brother’s self-sacrificing offer, the Prince of Wales apparently replied to members of his inner circle ‘hell will freeze over before one apologises to that arrogant, self-serving little prick. Up the Villa’.

So there we have it. It appears that a British public consumed with a sense of loss and longing for Harry’s return are sadly doomed to be disappointed. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”.

Mirror

Nominated by Ron Knee.

A First Class cunting (but you can’t be sure it will arrive next day) for Royal Mail who on October 7th will for the second time this year rise the price of a First Class stamp to 1.65

This hideous company, whose chairmen in recent years are too incompetent to arrange a fuck in a brothel, are really taken liberties now. It will decimate the mail order business for one thing. Even now, it is not unusual for a 1st class letter to take two days to arrive.

Still I suppose it i all part of Adolf Starmer’s “progressive politics” – you notice not a word of recrimination for the governing party.:

Daily Express.

Nominated by : W. C. Boggs

I don’t mean to cause offence to the nice gentleman in the bar who is shouting “OI. You lookin’ at my bird?” He is, of course, not a cunt, and I’d better shut up or fucking else. Nononono. Something in my eye. Sorry.

My gripe is with the obvious butch lezza, cropped hair, 4’8″ tall, 4’9″ wide but not in dungarees, who was blocking my access to the milk in the Co-op today. “Could you excuse me a second?”, I asked. It moved grudgingly aside, and then, with the speed of a slug on Mandrax, a thought occurred to it, “Did you just call me ‘Sir’?” it enquired, with more than a soupcon of strop. I repeated what I had said, with extra clarity for the hard of understanding. It didn’t reply, and I moved on towards the ripen-at-home nectarines. Thinking.

Butch lezza was definitely looking for trouble. If I HAD called it Sir, I can only imagine that the next move would have been a call to the (thought) police. At the very least, I could have expected a loud lecture on gender identity, and instruction as to which precise category the cunt fitted, complete with silly pronouns. You don’t have to be a mind reader these days. If a complete stranger raises a gender-related issue for no apparent, or an invented, reason, they’re looking for trouble.

Be on your guard, cunters. It’s not just in the Co-Op. It’s global:

www.unesco

Nominated by Komodo.

The BBC & Climate Change ► “The Cunts That Keep On Giving

BBC Weather.

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ IT`S OFFICIAL ! ! !

We`re all going to die !!!!!!!!!!!!!*

(*ᵇᵘᵗ ᵖʳᵒᵇᵃᵇˡʸ ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃˢ ᵃ ᶜᵒⁿˢᵉᑫᵘᵉⁿᶜᵉ ᵒᶠ ᵃⁿʸ ʰᵉᵃᵗ⁻ʳᵉˡᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᵉᵖⁱˢᵒᵈᵉ).

Nothing more to say really as its all been said before within these hallowèd threads – still, that doesn’t seem to bother the MSM who continue to regurgitate the same old rhetoric with monumental regularity for the benefit of the exploited masses.

Probably all `written` by AI these days anyway.

Nominated by : Sam Beau