The organisers of the wank fest that is to be the Paris Olympics have vowed that it will be ‘the greenest ever’.
How they intend to achieve that is anyone’s guess.
The thousands of athletes arriving there will not be walking.
The hundreds of thousands of spectators will not be turning up on sailing boats.
The athletes will be housed in a purpose built village. Built mainly of concrete.
The spectators will be in overpriced hotel rooms.
All of them will have air conditioning and an overworked laundry service.
Everywhere will be well lit.
There will be some vegetarians making their futile attempts to save the world by not eating meat, but nowhere near enough to make the event ‘green’.
Perhaps there may be a fleet of electric buses to get people to and from venues and maybe recyclable bottles for drinks.
Yep, that will save the Earth.
The biggest cunt of all is Chris Boardman.
To highlight the green credentials he is cycling to Paris.
Stopping of many times en route to preach ‘The Message’.
Well done Chris!
But how is your luggage getting to Paris?
You are certainly not carrying it on your bike.
Do you think that we are all fucking stupid Chris?
What about the tens of tons of equipment that each country will send along with their broadcasting teams?
What about the many dozens of horses that will be flown in from all over the world for the equestrian events?
The private jets for dignitaries.
Just a few miles of flying in one of them will wipe out Mr Boardman’s noble efforts.
Knock it on the head Chris, you cunt.
Get on a plane or drive there like every other fucker is going to do.
BBC News.
And a few other things Chris………
How can stopping off every night at different hotels be greener than flying or driving to Paris non stop?
You are in a Government appointed job as ‘chair’ of Sport for England.
All your unnecessary hotel rooms and food and drink will be being paid for by the tax payer.
You will not be paying anything out of your own pocket.
I suppose that it’s easy to be seen as being green at someone else’s expense.
And what about the constant maintenance of you and your bike?
Tyres and inner tubes made from Indian rubber.
Oil for lubrication.
Petroleum based creams to soothe your chaffed arse.
All these things will be looked after by your support team who will be following your epic bike ride.
They will be close behind you….. In a car.
All these people will need hotel rooms too.
They will all need feeding.
The local and national reporters coming along to interview you at every stop.
They won’t be coming along on their bikes.
Chris Boardman.
Monumental cunt.
Nominated by : The Artful Cunter
Silver goes to Sam Beau for this:
Since when the fuck did skateboarding become a sport, let alone be ratified into the Olympics? Probably at the same time as snowboarding was admitted – both performed by the same sort of scrotal mongers, I would wager.
So, why not have darts then? Or tiddlywinks? Or angling? Or squash (which I think they did try once, but I can`t be arsed to verify).
And I know it`s been cunted before, dear cunters, but fucking dressage?!
Or Strictly Horse Dancing to give it its proper name. I wonder if the poor horses know what utter pansies they look like mincing about just because Jemima, Tabitha & Araminta think it looks oh-so cute. Why not dress them up in dolls` clothes while you’re at it.
My suggestion would be to combine said sports in some interesting way to make them more exciting and watchable. I propose `Horse Skateboarding` – just strap a skateboard onto each of their hooves and off you go. Or rather, off they go, most likely in several different directions.
Perhaps YOU could invent a more amusing portmanteau manglement of hitherto innocuous pastimes?
Anyway, something to fire your vivid imaginations here …
GQ.
Bronze goes to Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea for this:
Two men masquerading as women have been allowed to compete in the women’s boxing competition:
Grauniad.
No doubt they will flatten their opponents on the way to gold and drag the Olympic flag further through the cesspool that is now international sport. This following on from the testicle festival that was the opening ceremony, and the most chaotic football match ever.
Obviously Russia is not allowed to compete, because they are evil war criminals. Some of their athletes are allowed. but not more than 55. Oh, and they are not allowed to be shown in the medals table and are to be referred to as AIN.
In other Olympic news, Hercules is soon to be stripped of his discus gold as he was a supporter of the slave economy of Ancient Greece. Fuck off.
Saved by the bell (just) is this from Paul:
TRANNY BOXERS FEMALE opponent (real one!) forced to quit in within 46 seconds.
The Woke Olympics. What a fucking shit show. You got that cunt Daley knitting in between bouts and then forcing the world to watch him kissing his ‘husband’? and then you have this fucking travesty where a NATURAL FEMALE is forced to compete against a geezer who thinks it’s a woman. Obviously, the tranny boxer has a massive fucking advantage over the REAL WOMAN boxer. This is pathetic and disgusting and patently not right or in any way sporting. These mental woke CUNTS pulling the strings should be shot and pissed on. I refuse to watch this shit. My television is almost obsolete because of the 99.9% woke bullshit they are feeding us. Anyway I added the news link that got me on this rant. Until the next time………
Sly Sports.
