The Spanish Football Team

No not because they beat us in the Euro final, because at their celebration they started singing and ranting about Gibraltar being Spanish.

I accepted their win with good grace because I’m English and not a sun baked waiter the cunts.

Fuck them, politicising sport, take a knee, in your fucking faces.

Go count the ships in your Armada and fuck off Pedro

bbcnews

Nominated by Sixdog Vomit.

CrossCUNTry Trains


Right now (11th August 2024) I’m back home visiting family. Part of my journey involved having to take a CrossCountry train from Sheffield to Bristol Temple Meads. And, like every other occasion where I have been forced to use them, said journey was hell on earth.

Why do they only put 4 fucking carriages on one of their busiest routes?
Why do said carriages have absolutely nothing in the way of air conditioning?
Why do their toilets resemble outdoor bogs that you’d find in the most deprived, rundown areas of Kabul?
Why do they only have enough legroom for people the size of Warwick Davis?
Why am I being charged EIGHTY FUCKING POUNDS to travel cattle class?

Even Indian trains are better than this ffs. To call them the Ryanair of train travel would be offensive to Ryanair. The sooner I learn to drive, and the sooner I can FINALLY stop having to rely on these thieving charlatans, the better.

BBC News.

Nominated by : OpinionatedCunt

Charlotte Dujardin Apologists


“B-b-but she’s only human! Everyone makes mistakes!”

“It was a simple error of judgement!”

“She didn’t harm the horse really.”

The horse would’ve barely felt it!”

‘She’s being tried by social media!

“Won’t someone think about her mental health?!”

Fuck off you absolute cunts. Whipping an animal TWENTY FOUR times is NOT a mistake. it is NOT an error of judgement. It is animal cruelty, and nothing less. Cruelty which the horse clearly felt judging by the amount of bucking in the video. She knew what she was doing, and she counted on being able to get away with it because of her status. This woman deserves no sympathy whatsoever. Fuck her mental elf. I hope she gets exactly the same treatment she gave that poor animal and then some.

YouTube.

Some of the comments on here demonstrate my point as well.

FecesBook.

Nominated by : OpinionatedCunt

Jim Dale


Professional Climate Change Worrier. Not the last remaining member of the Carry On team.

And my word does the old bloodhound mug worry. The look is fawning cur after a swift kick in the bollocks. Pleading liquid eyes, flat boring midlands accent (very like the fun voice-over on the prostate ad), boat race composed of middle aged bags dragged down to the centre of the earth by gravity, large proboscis asking to be punched, a symphony of age, fail and decay. Pops up regularly on GB News as one of their token green lefties declaiming doom and global destruction.

This time around was imported on a feed from sun soaked Thailand (land of ladyboys and little boys) to be asked about the latest hot weather in Europe around the Olympics. Clearly tanned – well reddened actually – and embarrassed to be reporting from Boyland but the appearance fee trumps all. “In my job I can work from anywhere” and had offset his travel “I volunteered to pay an extra fee when I booked my plane ticket”. GB News incredulous at the cunts woketude but then that was the reason for him being there, to be sneered at. Yours Truly gets sneered at all the time but seldom gets paid for it.

My tip to cool down Paris for the Olympics Monsewer Macron, forget trying to clean up Paris, get all the Frogs and dogs out to piss on the streets as normal. Ammonia is an effective refrigerant. Vous savez que cela a un sens (you know it makes sense)

Infomash on the cunt:

I know I have had Bond villains on the brain of late but surely…..

https://www.britishweatherservices.uk/info-page/personnel.aspx

Chief Meteorologist and Founder of British Weather Services, an advisory Think Tank at the service of Industry, Governments, GB News and other worthy bodies. If you wonder what happens to old weathermen when they have fucked up and vanish they go and work for Jim. Manchester born (a fucking Manky) hence the flat irritating Corry accent. Dropped his real surname (Bacon) along the way, always a dodgy sign.

On reflection I believe I must be in error. Surely this is the “Carry On” Jim:

https://newa.expert/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/E4323.pdf

Nominated by : Sir Limply Stoke

Absolutely!


I am sorry I can’t provide a link, but turn on Wireless 4 any day of the week, especially during Money Box and You And Yours, and I guarantee you will hear some old bag screech the word “ABSOLUTELY!!”

You know the type. She went to “uni” always says “Thanks for having me on” before she starts her speech which always begins with “So-…”. Citizen Advice Bureau wimminz, “influencers” (aka ponces who want free stuff), company spokeswimmiz they all say “abs-so-lutee-lee!”. Many of them are in middle age but they all sound about 16, shrill and ever-so-enthusiastic. It happens to be a favourite of wimmiz MPs as well.

Can the BBC not call a ban on that word?. How about “quite” or “correct” or “I agree” or just an austere “Yes” , please no more fucking absolutelies. And why, since they are not being paid for their appearance why thank the fucking BBC for “having them on”. I would say “May I say to you, how generous of me is it to grace your tatty programme without a fee”

Is the word overused on the radio? – Absolutely!!!!!

Nominated by : W. C. Boggs