A bit short but we’ll allow it as some of you might have some gripping stories to tell – NA
Ok, off the fucking wall nomination here but I’m going to nominate Jury Service. Not as a juror but as the long fucking suffering other arf of a juror listening to them worrying about the legal aspects of said case and banging on and fucking on about it in depth.
As I reach the point of wanting our former hangman Albert to top em even if it’s something minor.
Oh I’ll add the missus did a murder trial for a few weeks. Bloke was a cunt as well.
CookdandBombd. (Link passed down by Unkle Terry)
Nominated by : Paul Goddard
I’d love to do it.
I’m perfect for jury duty!
open minded, non judgemental,
fair, socially compassionate..
GUILTY.
Missus Miserable got called,she didn’t like it,
obviously not got any sense of vengeance or retribution, they dropped a bollock,
should of called me.
4
My dad did it too
his words-
” he was clearly guilty the scruffy cunt,
but it was full of stupid fuckin women saying he might not be,
just me and this other bloke said he was guilty
I told em ,
just look at him!
are you fuckin mad?!!!”
😆
3
I’ve done it twice and I hear you. The other jurors were thick cunts who spent hours deliberating over irrelevant wank, like they were in a crime drama, when we had had clear direction from the Judge how to consider a legal guilty or not.
One of them was a ginger poove who had appeared on Come Dine With Me, I recognised him but no-one else did, the pretentious twat.
4
That Christina Pike in Tennessee given lethal injection,
snoring?!!
so they rushed her to hospital?
why?
pop a carrier bag over her head and suffocate her.
easy fix.
2
I don’t get this Mis. This is just the most recent case where someone has yet again survived a “lethal” injection. This is in the States where everyone is armed to the teeth. Why are they fucking about?
0
I’d have loved to’ve been the holdout juror in the Lindsay Clancy jury.
Telling those fat, middle-aged, self-important, child-murderer apologist bitches that they’re wrong and that Clancy was as guilty as sin would’ve been highly satisfying.
Well done to that holdout juror…a black catholic man, I believe.
4
They weren’t wrong.
They were psychopathic.
11 out of 12 people wanting to let a CALCULATED CHILD MURDERER off because ‘sympathy’ is a very scary statistic.
4
Pakı defendant?
Guilty.
Black inner city youth?
Guilty.
Works for the BBC?
Guilty.
4
Drives an EV?
Guilty.
4
And straight out to the gibbet.
0
Many years ago my brother was called up for jury service. He said that no matter what the evidence the person was guilty. I had to point out to him that he was going to serve on an inquest jury.
3
id sentence Ed Sheerhan to death if hosting Jukebox Jury
2
A year ago I’d have said fine, because of his crimes against the pop parade. But now he’s been cancelled by the ‘Free Palestine even though it’s stuffed to the gills with rapists and bombers from birth’ brigade, I have a little more sympathy for him.
I say a little, he can never be forgiven for the aural trauma of that line in his all-time worst Shape Of You, “Last night you were in my room, and now my bedsheets smell like you”. You love your bedsheets minging of tuna and jampot? Have a word with yourself.
2
Your too kind Wokey like me.
But justice must be served.
Eds got eyes that are trying to look round corners,
a common ailment in the criminal classes,
plus his fawning , pleading not to be dragged into a political debate turned my tripes.
Not only would I hang him id put him on display outside Manchester Apollo as a warning to other musicians.
0
Served on a coroners jury recently.
But you can’t portion blame on anyone..
But spoiler alert it was all the third world medical staffs fault.
Incompetent cunts..
2
I’ve not been called up for jury service. Yet.
Which is good, because I’ve absolutely no desire to spend two weeks or more arguing the toss with a bunch of hand wringing lefties who think everyone deserves a second, third, fourth or fifth chance.
And why are these juries so seemingly packed with simpering lefty types?
I wouldn’t put it past the modern state to be judging your eligibility based on the online data they harvest, and estimating from that your political leanings.
That’s probably why I’ve not had the call.
1
They were definitely ‘postcode profiling’ when I did it over ten years ago. We only had one ‘council estate’ type juror, and yes she was thick as fucking mince and obstructed the deliberations with ‘feelings’ over clearly spelled out legal interpretation of evidence, which was completely beyond her fag-breathed intellect..
0
You are exempt from jury service if you are
– On bail
– Have served a prison term in the last 10 years
– Have ever served a prison term of 5 years or more
– Are mentally incapable, or
– Are sectioned under the Mental Health Act
So that’s 5 reasons why I’ve never been called up.
2