My nomination is stupid cunts. Example Mr awww a cute pussy cat, I’ll climb over the big barrier and cuddle tiddles.
No, it’s Altai a big bastard tiger with muscles and huge claws and teeth and tiger then chewed up the stupid person ending his life.
So one less but there are millions of them and we nanny and baby the nation to the point of it being utterly ridiculous. Not helped by endless chancer twats who when they do themselves harm decide that someone has to pay them a huge wedge of cash backed up by an oily cunt lawyer.
Not far from me is a bridge and as you walk over it every few yards there’s a sign saying about if your unhappy don’t go jumping off but call the Samaritans. Someone did jump off a few decades ago, didn’t die just stuck in the mud and looked like a twat.
Me I’d take the signs down, go ahead jump let the RNLI fish your corpse out as they bring in another load of Abdulistan chancers from France.
Take down half the ‘elf n safety nonsense and let the gene pool cleanse itself. Mind if people are a tad suicidal let them pop off to the tiger enclosure and get used as a chew toy.
That said if the RNLI want to drop the Abdulistan lot off as well that would be handy, not sure if I’m breaking any animal cruelty laws mind.
Nominated by Paul Goddard, seconded by Sheikh_Anvakh link by Unkle Terry.
If I may. I’d like to second this well targeted cunting.
This candidate for a postumous Darwin Award and people like him aren’t just stupid cunts, they’re far worse, stupid SELFISH cunts.
I can understand why some may have reached a pit of despair where they want to ending it all. The old style was a bottle of pills, the slitting of wrists, a length of rope, usually in private, to be found later on.
These cunts are of the poor meeee, look-at-me-MEEE exhibitionists who want a posthumous headline for their inadequate non-achieving lives, a “blaze of glory”, or in the case of Mr Cat Food, a blaze of gory.
The amount of shit in the wake of their suicidal exhibitionism, the zoo having to close for a while. the enquiries, the usual fucking busybodies, the publicity grubbing politicians and the rabid salacious media all cashing in.
Meanwhile, what of the innocent and beautiful tiger? As a result of Mr Cat Chew-Toy’s selfish and terminal exhibitionism, some “experts” have called for the tiger to be “euthanised” that soft, Americanised term for MURDERED because said tiger could “pose a risk”.
Of course it poses a risk, it’s a fucking apex predator, which is why it’s in an enclosure, posing no risk, until said stupid selfish look-at-me-MEEE shit-for-brains cunt offers himself as a big cat toy.
Then there are the usual, generally vegetarian or worse “vegan” and often snot-hanger-nose-ringed, coloured-haired mongs who whine on about not having zoos.
Naturally the “enquiry” will drag on for months with the talking heads and petty officials jockeying for attention, yet there can only be one conclusion.
Mr Cat Chew-Toy is the only one to blame, the tiger is completely innocent, the zoo clearly had adequate facilities or it would’ve been sanctioned ages ago.
Thankfully at least for now, the tiger has been spared from being murdered, but I predict days of analyses and excuses for the Man who would be tiger shit. and absolutely no-one will dare to be “judgemental” fearing the usual media and social media pile-on.
Mr Cat Chew-Toy is an utter selfish cunt, waiting for the next one to publicly splatter themselves from a motorway bridge. under a train for “the world to see” and fuck off to the feelings and consequences to those who end up witnessing it. What a cunt, Now that’s what I call a mauling.
Apologies for any typos.
This guy ‘just happened’ to have been media-adjacent in his youth. Isn’t it funny how whenever these things happen, it’s never Ethel from Basingstoke, it’s always someone with an ‘interesting past’ that they can highlight.
I don’t know what the purpose of literally throwing someone to the lions was, but clearly that’s what this was.
Remember Rudubanana was a Dr Who Poster Shithead. And then that middle class mental alcoholic bint that fell in the river, Nicola Bully, yeah I’m sure she was just a ‘nobody’ too.
Since 2020 I’ve learned that ABSOLUTELY EVERY FUCKING WORD out of government and media is ABSOLUTE FUCKING GASLIGHTING CUNT.
11
Its the evolution of cameras and phones, every retard thinks they are the star of the truman show..
Time to bring back feeding people to the lions, starting with influencers. Should get alot a views..
7
Influencers – agreed, every one of them each along with a ‘celebrity’ to hold their hands as Charon rows them across the Styx.
I’d start with I Claudius Winkelstein but can’t think of a big cat sufficiently lacking in taste to want to take a bite out of that camera hungry, gurning and asymmetric faced hag.
3
At South Lakes zoo they used to have these big telegraph poles, 20ft,
with dead chickens nailed at the top.
At feeding time they’d release the tigers who would climb up and grab the chicken.
you got to truly see how powerful and big a apex predator they were.
awesome.
once someone left a gate unlatched and a tiger mauled and killed a woman zookeeper.
they had a very laid back approach to health and safety at South Lakes zoo.
But you can see where I’m going here can’t you?
The other visitors saying
” ooh it was awful
that poor young man’s
mm.
Bet everyone of them had their phone out filming it.
4
Don’t be so harsh Mis, William Chapman was suffering a severe mental health breakdown at the time, probably because his PIP payment had been held back.
4
“Hunting tigers can be ripping fun,” as Vivian Stanshall used to say – “Out in out in out in Doncaster.”
5
The bloke obviously had mental problems.
The zoo should of got him to sign a waiver and dress in a chicken costume first.
5
Louis the something or other liked to shoot Protestants dressed up as Blackbirds.
4
Darwinian selection ended for us at least a century ago thanks to advances in medicine. Throw in the welfare state, which has become an international welfare state, and we now have a population full of mutations.
Sometimes these mutations are physically obvious in some way, but they also manifest in more hidden ways: mental health issues, personality disorders, a lack of discipline, being left-wing, etc.
Add in modern technology, which is lowering the general IQ, and we end up with a weak, lazy, stupid, inbred, needy population. The national debt is one of the signals of this, as is our national decline generally.
The only way to get back on track is for us to end the modern welfare state; euthanize those born with significant genetic disorders; ban third world trash from entering the country and kick out those who are here already; bring back mental asylums; reintroduce the death penalty for serious criminality; and introduce slave labour for those who are unable to contribute properly.
We probably need a system of camps, run by the sort of person who has a track record as a successful chicken farmer, to speed things up.
If we don’t do these things as a matter of urgency then we won’t ever recover. Is any of this “nice”? No it isn’t, but being nice will create a worse disaster in the long run.
7
Allowing women to vote and be involved in government and positions of authority is another key culprit. They apply their nurturing nature in totally inappropriate ways. This must end.
At least a third of the population seems to be either “disabled” or on medication for mental health issues. There are nutters everywhere. It is like an open-air lunatic asylum, and we are expected to all be curtailed in our lives to accommodate the weakest, stupidest and maddest.
4
For fucks sake, even the head of state is nuts. Charles The Mad. His entire family are shite. And his Majesty’s Government is a collection of school drop outs, psychopaths, inbreds, coloured rubbish and sexual deviants.
5
Well I’m no expert on the “ins and outs” of life insurance but my favourites are little yellow cunts being turned into frazzled by overhead power cables.
In a very close second place it’s pakis climbing up electricity pylons,again vigorously frazzled.
Dawinian selection,top notch.
The infallibly retardéd cunts.
Good morning.
4
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c678prm55gzzo
2
Add to that the Robertson’s in Africa ‘trying’ to steal HV cables that usually supply something quite important, like the local grid.
When I say ‘trying’, they usually only get the angle grinder to hit one of the phases and it’s good night Vienna.
3
Whenever I read a story of an idiot doing something patently stupid Odin and removing themselves from the gene pool, the same word always comes to mind; cyclist.
1
Very good Odin.
I’d almost forgotten the mad wógs that roll up to an overturned petrol tanker with a bucket..
And a fâg on.
Marvellous.
1
Never been that lucky to catch a nut case throw themselves to the lions or tigers in the zoo when I was a child, due to the animals being behind thick bars. Remember a hippopotamus at Belle Vue zoo being surrounded by a wall and people throwing it food and all sorts. The one memory is seeing a flat cap being thrown into its mouth and everyone laughing. You tend to give up these childish things when older.
4
thought it was a bit crass that the zoo was playing ‘thats neat,that’s neat, I really love your tiger 🐯 feet’ 🎶 over the p.a. system 😩….
5
Here’s a fantastic clip of tigers thinking they’re Billy Big Bollocks until a truly massive tiger enters the enclosure:
https://youtu.be/JMsCJhGtPKM?si=_0w83_uYW0n1o5tS
4
In the old days animal enclosures stank to high heaven. That’s probably once older is the reason why I loved the smell of unwashed females snatches and loved spending a long time eating them out.
1
In the old days animal enclosures stank to high heaven. That’s probably once older is the reason why I loved the smell of unwashed females snatches and loved spending a long time licking them out.
0
Talking of stupid cunts, here is a young lady from Australia – probable lezzie? – who is a Hydrex athlete who did a “Will From The In-Betweeners”. She wen to fart and instead shit herself, then the dirty cow, instead of cleaning herself, ran on in her shit besplattered knickers. Sweat and shit – what a frightful combination:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c6gr8l15k744o
4
You wouldn’t have had this commotion years ago, a dog would’ve licked the street clean and chased her for the rest of it.
1
It’s given me a great idea. Rank had the gong, MGM had the lion, but Boggs Pornographic Film Productions (Taiwan) Limited has long been in need of a trade mark ident, so how about a multicoloured gym, with Emily Thornberry in a pure white sports bra and tight white shorts, pumping iron. She bends over and as she does so we hear a bowel eructation, then the shorts become pebbledashed and it spells out BPFP. What a metaphor.
0
Don’t know what he here, think I stuttered upon it.
0
Cats need a varied diet and I am all in favour of nutters climbing into their enclosures.
Also tigers must get bored and it’s not like you can give them a ball of string to play with.
Good morning.
4
A nom for stupid cunts and nobody has mentioned the Labour party or the fucking retarded cunts who voted them in.
Just to ensure people the world over know what a uber gullible stupid cunt looks like, I present to you the people of Makerfield.
4
Beat me to it.
The Halfwits of Makerfield.
couldn’t have a zoo there!
fuck me they had to fill in the duckpond when half of the community drowned trying to get free bread.
A curse upon them.
the bunch of spastics
3
Although how many stupid buggers voted for the nominal ‘Tories’?
They’ve been wetter than Kiera Knightley’s snatch since the days of David Cameron…whatever happened to the £35 billion for the track & trace app (that ai could’ve written in a couple of hours) during chınkyflu, eh Rishi Sunak?
You bud-bud ding-ding lying thieving piece of shit.
2
Thick northerners, what else would you expect 😉
1
@odin… they seemingly fell for the magical oratory of herr Burnham as he strutted around the vape shops,24hr mini markets,& salmonella chiggun outlets accompanied by a cavalcade of benidorm style ‘disability’ scooters… waving his magic 🪄 wand …’andy declared..Up da toffees’ and the spell was cast 😵💫
1
A former boss of mine topped himself in 2017. The cherry on top was the fact he bodged it and took half an hour to expire. I opened a special bottle put aside for just such an occasion. Put me in a good mood for weeks. Still makes me smile.
3
If you are going in to talk to the animals, maybe stick to penguins or armadillo, tigers and other large predators are great conversationalists.
It’s one growl and then snap.
2
When I was a kid, I always looked up to my older brother, Tommy. He was the jock, and I was the little performer.
We were all out at the zoo one day. I was doing some acting, walking on the railing of the gorilla exhibit. I fell in.
Everyone screamed, and Tommy jumped in after me, forgetting that he had blueberries in his front pocket.
The gorillas just went wild. They jumped all over his body and threw him around like a rag doll to get to those blueberries.
One gorilla would throw him to another gorilla, who tossed him to another.
Everyone panicked and cried out for somebody to help, but it was too late.
The gorillas beat him to death before the zookeepers could gas them all.
My acting got my brother killed. I’ve had to live with that every single day.
1
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EIdxI800taA&pp=ygUaVGVhbSBhbWVyaWNhIGdhcnlzIGJyb3RoZXI%3D
0
His mistake was using sign language.
Not only do tigers despise deadheads but that waving around his hands probably made the tiger think he was some martial arts type and got the first punch in.
mate of mine was on manoeuvres in Malaya when in the forces,
said they only used hand signals to communicate.
as they made their way through thick jungle he said something burst out of the undergrowth,
hit the trail and jumped off ,
covering about 30ft in a couple of seconds.
tiger.
1