Chancellors and the Red Briefcase


A budget-conscious cunting for the Chancellor’s red briefcase.

Every smarmy Chancellor stands there outside #11, holding out the briefcase, performatively containing yet another stitch-up of English tax payers. But (adopting my Points Of View voice) why-oh-why do they all have to look so fucking smug about it?

Why can’t they look contrite? Embarrassed? Ashamed?

They fucking well should do, all of them, the miserable traitors.
With the upcoming budget (Torsten Bell and his communist cronies, not Rachael Reeves; she’s just the mouthpiece) Reeves will stand there like a cunt, looking smug despite knowing she’ll be replaced by New Year.

Does she or Jeremy Hunt have a more punchable face?

Nominated by : Thomas the Cunt Engine

27 thoughts on “Chancellors and the Red Briefcase

  1. All she has in that is a pair of outsize rubber knickers, a Kit Kat and a Durex just in case she manages to find a straight Labour MP

  2. I could not bring myself to watch, or listen to her whining. Does anyone know if she had a gin and tonic at the dispatch box? Or has it been banned by the health police?

  3. Nothing to boast about I know, but I have met Jeremy Cunt. He is quite tall. That is about all I remember about from the meeting. I imagine punching him would be like punching an empty paper bag. He was Health Secretary for six years, Being virtually invisible clearly served him well.

    • Am I alone in imagining Her from Complaints in gym slip and navy blue knickers administering slow hand relief?

      Dirty boy. Take a cold shower.

  4. Whats in yer handbag luv?
    Go open the flaps and show me whats in your red box!

    A droids guide to economics

    “ah, ehh, um, budget for working people ehh umm ahh tory black hole umm ahh ehh Labour manifesto ehh ummm ahhh…

    Jjjjust fffffuck off

  5. As far as I am concerned she can shove the red briefcase up her arse.My god she deserves a personality transplant.🤦‍♂️

  6. Strange one from Our Rachel From Complaints..

    Most of her new taxes aren’t slated to some in until 2028/29…

    Very odd for a pile of new taxes right before a General Election..

    Unless they all know that they won’t be in government then so can saddle Reform(?) with sorting out yet another disastrous term in office?

    So many questions…in the meantime Rach,as they used to say in wartime letters..TOKO.

    Good morning.

  7. A lifetime on the old PIP, knocking out kids to every Tom, DaShawn and Abdul from the comforts of your free house is obviously the only way to really prosper under a Labour government.

    Oh yes, and to be an illegal immigrant of course.

    Good morning.

  8. Tosser Bell and his mates pulling the strings that control Rachel’s mouth, useless cunts.

    I watched some of the Martin Lewis show, he had a few clips of an interview with Rachel from complaints, the one I was interested in covered the freeze on thresholds and state pension.
    In April the New State Pension will be just below the tax threshold and is guaranteed to go above the threshold in April 2027.
    Martin asked her about how tax will be taken if someone only has the State Pension and no other income, the answer ‘we are working on that’, so no fucking idea
    At least Rishi the suntan kid had the answer two years ago, just raise the threshold for those on state pension.

    She almost hinted that it wouldn’t be taken in the example above but that would then create a two tier tax system, fucking clueless.

      • I saw her asked about how the EV pay-per-mile tax would work. She said the tax would be levied on the mileage recorded during the car’s MOT. So the interviewer asked what about cars less than 3 years old that don’t need an MOT.

        She hadn’t a fucking clue.

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