Internet Tough Guys

We’ve had one on here recently (the bike sheds fella). I refer to those cunts who act hard online. I’ve had people call me a cunt, ‘correct’ my speech and all sorts online. I’ve seen these cunts do it to others.

I’d wager they’d never do it in real life, the shithouses.

Not that I’m hard or anything. Well, harder than you anyway.

Who wants some?


Know Your Meme Link

Nominated by: Cuntybollocks

106 thoughts on “Internet Tough Guys

    • To be honest, I didn’t think this one through.

      We all call people cunts on here, including heavyweight boxing champions.

      I think it’s more about those who act hard really. Fucking bellends.

      By the way, I’m soft as shite and would gladly throw women and children behind me if chased by a rioting mob.

      • It’s the armchair warriors I detest. Exterminations and the lust for a war that no sane person wants.
        The type of cunt who slags the police and would do a far better “job” , yet lacks the guts to join the job.
        Yes I agree cuntybollocks.

  1. everyone is Bruce Lee until some little arsehole turns up with a shitbull on a chain, one used to walk down our high street in the middle of the road with a stream of cars queued up behind him, he’d stop while the dog had a crap then walk on again…all the length of the street…because he one ever got out of their cars

    • Was no-one tempted to run hIm over?! I’m guessing he’d come off the worst in a showdown between flesh and bone and a car moving at 30 mph down a high street.

  2. Funnily enough the nom sums up the millions of left wing key board warriors that inhabit our country.
    These are the ones that threaten death, extreme violence and destruction to people who are pretty normal and centrist in their views but they deem ‘Far Right’ (like Jordan Peterson)

    These are the same ones that live with their parents, are in their late 30’s, are two stone piss wet through, pale as a ghost through malnutrition, have never had a fight in their lives, have never shagged a bird in their lives, have never handled a firearm, have never cracked a joke and finally have never contributed to society in any normal way.

    As they are outcasts and oddballs they are naturally drawn to the ‘diversity and inclusion’ noise that the left wing media pedals, and are quick to defend its ideals via the only way they know how………
    The Internet and from the security of their own wank-dens.

  3. “I’ve had people call me a cunt,
    Correct my speech”…


    That’s part of the fun isn’t it?

    Was it Fiddler?

    • Afternoon Miserable.

      If like Twitter, can you imagine going to plod and asking them to investigate mean things said on IsAC? I suspect most of the non woke pussies would end up joining.

      Fiddler neither confirms or denies these accusations.

    • Fair dos.

      It wasn’t DF or anyone here. Olden days when I used social media. Some pencil neck who wouldn’t say boo to a goose in real life, called me a ‘fucking cunt’ on Arsebook (in a vindictive way).

      I sent him a private message asking him to say that to my face in the local pub later.

      I did it privately which makes it ok. I think.

      Those are the rules I’ve just made up and I’m fucking sticking to them.

      • CB@

        Some right fuckin nuts have come through here over the years,
        Some of the arguments have had me crying with laughter.

        Your always going to get the odd keyboard warrior type on any site,
        Best to just provoke them into a meltdown 😄

      • Indeed MNC.

        Talking of nuts, I fucking love those posts from our new one.

        He should have his own page on here. Very entertaining.

        David Icke is a massive gay compared to him. Her. It (maybe a lizard or hologram).

        But who know..maybe the cunt is right?

      • Yes, Arsebook is the new home of the intenet hard case. I had a few threats of violence on there, sometimes through a PM, sometimes via a mutual ‘friend’ (one said his friend would fuck me up because he is a ‘big black bastard’ – i kept referring to it in a homoerotic way until he blocked me).

      • I don’t think mentioning your artisan Country Cream gates helped Miserable.

        Some people just hate others success.

  4. Can internet tough guys be done for “hate crimes”? I mean what they really do is harass, bully and wage hate campaigns. Some of them even create multiple accounts on the same platforms to make it look like they’ve got strength in numbers. Their daily routine goes something like this:
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste
    Harass, Bully, Copy & Paste

    • No they can’t be done for hate crime…..unless their victim is…..

      A gender bender of some sort
      An effnick
      A vegan
      A Greta Thunderpants worshipper
      A lefty tosser

      Anyone normal is fair game.

  5. ‘Any issues feel free to come visit me, lets have this discussion face to face, not that the sackless cucks on the internet are generally brave enough. I live in Worcestershire so any takers drop me a message as I’d never back down. Keyboard warriors need not apply as those cunts never turn up’.

    Hate filled cunt aka ‘The Worcestershire Warrior’, July 2022. Never gets any less amusing every time you read it🤣🤣 The original Captain Irony.

  6. We’ve had some classics here. Disabled Toilet Dave, who was a member of the dark web and the IRA . He was fucking hilarious.

    Not forgetting Ricardo Doubledick, of course. Hassled a lady, but he wasn’t so gobby when somebody actually knocked on his door. As Paul Weller sang, ‘And what you give is what you get’.

  7. keyword warriors? this afternoon I had some cunt who thought he was a tough bloke, as I was driving through town the road ahead of me was clear but it has a very bad blind corner as you go up hill and on the other side it has a t junction and always has traffic, everybody in the village knows it is a bad stretch of road and more often than not a mobile speed camera van is always parked on the other side of the road, anyhow as I’m driving about 22 miles an hour the limit is 30 some wanker starts flashing me to speed up and giving me hand signals, now this twat must not have been a local because everyone who lives there don’t speed because you are likely to have an accident if you do, so I get over the hill to the crossroads and the traffic light is red and I stop , so the twat behind me starts mouthing off at me , so I get out of the car and this meek looking Clark Kent type starts to put his window up, after he moans about me doing 20 mph , so I called him various swear words and the pipsqueak shits himself, I can imagine he is the sort of twat who sits at home with his mum acting like a tough one, when in fact he is a pussy

    • From the film Commando which, in reality, was a story of unrequited homosexual love.

      The baddie of the film, Bennett, couldn’t have been any more gay. Freddie Mercury ‘tache, chain mail overjacket and leather trousers. Surprising the number of people I have spoken to who thought it was a straightforward 80s action movie.

      What was obvious is that Bennett just wanted to bum Arnie’s character to death.

      • Bennett, one of the great antagonists of the eighties.

        Being an Aussie added to the appeal.

        He should’ve popped up in Neighbours as the estranged son of Mrs Mangel.

    • He made the mistake of crossing Dick Fiddler! Like taking on a Gatling gun with a Swiss Army knife. That exchange had me in stitches! The pt I was minding in the back of the truck kept asking what I was laughing at! The nosy old cunt.

  8. Today’s words for the Marcus Rashford are
    Mediocre. Useless. Dog Turd. Incompetent .

    Bonus words are Fucking Shite and Delusional

  9. Before the Worcestershire Warrior on here, most Internet hard cases i witnessed were silly American teenagers called Kyle and Jared who wore their baseball hats backwards and punched their bedroom wall a lot, and that was back in the noughties.
    There were a few saddos on Facebook who wanted to fight but i laughed at them and shared their posts with friends.

      • I must commend Cunstable never rising to my mean-spirited anti-Welshness…if he came after me, he’d crush my skull because living in caves makes them strong.
        Indeed, it’d take a team of 7 Englishmen to take down just one fully-grown Welshwoman, related as they are to cave trolls.
        In fact, wasn’t that a scene in ‘The Fellowship of the Ring” where all those bendery hobbits and Gandalf have to use all their weapons and skill to overcome the Welshwoman/Cave Troll?

      • Oi.
        Paddy no mates.
        Stop feeling sorry for yourself!

        I like you, your a Doors fan,
        And part of the scenery 👍

      • Indeed TtCE, lungs cast of coal, voices that would drown out a fog horn alert and when pissed, well they just get there’re cocks out, on any available table full of glasses or is it classes.
        As poor Peggy used to say to Mannix when he had to meet with someone dodgy , “it could be a Trap Joe”
        Fucking Trolls eh

      • Mannix usually came back to the office later on, after the shit was beat out of him. Peggy was always there for him and she never once said “i warned you” as she went looking for iodine and bandages.

    • Wasnt Thomas the Tank Engine Welsh? Or was it Scouse? Anyway. I’m as hard as fuck like all cunts from Cwmscwt.

      • Nope, it was James who was Welsh.
        He was red, blatantly a commie Welsh nationalist who’d burn down those capitalist Island of Sodor engine sheds by blowing up his own boiler.

      • Thomas was a Scouse cunt.
        Your thinking of Ivor the cunt engine.

        He was a Welsh cunt.

      • Dearie me, MNC…chınkyflu has addled your brain…Percy was the scouse engine…

  10. Fuck the lot of you! I’m buying a bike shed.

    Seriously guys I’ve been hard on he internet many times…….oh I see, ooops carry on.

    Peace and Love

    It’s difficult to act like a hard man when you know that you have to sit down to put your pants on.

    I did recently get threatened by a French cunt on the internet but I couldn’t take it seriously because he was French.

  11. If it really is ‘the quiet ones’ (who are the hardest), then dear, sweet, missed Spoonington would’ve pasted all of us!

  12. For moments of escapism and laughs, I’ve reamed (in a manner of speaking) the back catalogue of posts on this esteemed site. It’s surprising / comforting how long it’s been in existence (long may it continue). Raising my glass to you Gents (and occasional wimmin) who keep it all going and keep us sane, cheers

  13. Never mind imaginary digital foes..

    I’ve just walked through my living room and seen two men dancing together on Shitty Cunts Prancing.

    Why oh why can’t the iron fist of the keyboard kommando write some quite strong words to the slop at BBCistan and fear them into shutting such frightful bummery out?

    Oh the horror..

    • One hopes the sight of such twirling mincery didn’t make you fully tumescent within the blink of an eye, UT?
      Especially in front of the missus and the dog.

      • Well Thomas I really must say I’d rather bum some sort of sense into the Prime Minister Tim Brooke-Taylor (copyright MNC 2022) than chance a Monkeypox.

        Right I’m off to Worcester to fight a bicycle behind a hate shed.

  14. Those old bread making ovens UT, will be vital for future generations as we develop and adapt to the art of fine corpses cuisine especially when you control the heat, medium rare possibly but i prefer my lamb proper cooked.
    Its either that, or “anyone for maggots only a tenner a pack” ” fack off luv, the locusts won’t be in season for months on end”

  15. How has Trannydom got so much power? Yes some of them are big men but…we seem so intimidated by them. They have only to say a word and everbody cowers in terror it seems.
    I wish some ‘ard cunt would just kick ’em in the bollocks when when they appear.
    That’s what would happen in Russia.
    We’re so fucking cowardly and fucking sensitive-minded.
    The dear old gy*pos wouldnt fucking entertain them.
    Only our ‘Democracy’ gives them a voice.
    Same with the ‘Omo. The whole fucking country has to bow down to them.
    Pride month when all our streets are turned into to an exhibitionist spectacle
    We have no backbone anymore.
    We’re weak, spineless.

    • The faggotTree lies alone solitary in a field, demanding to be recognised in a baron landscape background.
      All the norms look at this scene daily as they drive by but never stop the car too really see the composition.
      We all accept this everywhere because it would be too much of a hassle, to critique this over protected scrub with bent flowing branches as the current wind demands.
      That wind, is in for a change of direction sooner than one thinks, very soon in fact because Its fucking Over in the good old USA and Pelpissy an Biden soaked in it, are over as is the shit that Americans had to endure from that cesspit that is California
      “The war is over
      American Soldier”
      Bit pissed myself, i must admit

    • The natural order of life will reassert itself, eventually. History is replete with blips of sexual deviancy tolerance – then the hammer comes down. The rise of Islam this century might see all this shite off. Something will… eventually.

      • I’m sure you’re right.
        A sizeable proportion of cunters here have much in common with the tenets of Islam. E.g.
        Pro death penalty
        Deeply reactionary
        Anti freedom of expression
        Pro blasphemy laws
        Hanker for an authoritarian, Putin style dictatorship…
        And they’re just the positives!

  16. This coming winter I’m betting on.
    We’re a polite people the British.
    Known for not causing a fuss and our tolerance.

    We’re also known for going apeshit and conquering most of the world when our danders up!

    And nothing like power cuts, piss taking politicians, rising inflation etc
    To test our patience.

    Some screeching student types and Danny laRues might just push their luck…

    • Ah i see Jaysus didn’t take the MNC just quite yet, fuckin teasin is all i am. Hope you will be good for a few jobs during the week Mis and get your arse down to a trans club an start coughing before the fuckin thing were off you, all the best

    • Yeah we haven’t had a good invasion for a while now have we? A bit of good old fashioned land grabbing will do wonders for the national spirit and moral.

      • Joe Average isn’t such a mellow chap when he’s sat in the dark eating cold beans for his tea LL .

        Something will give.

      • I think Extinction Rebellion have got protests planned over the coming weeks Miserable. I really can see someone just ploughing through a line of these selfish wankers when they block a road.

      • Yeah, the Islington martyr loves the proletariat meal of cold beans.
        Long as they’re ethically sourced beans from Waitrose.

        Image him on a picket line?
        Blokes sick with worry about the bills, school shoes for the kids,
        Huddled round a burning brazier?
        Jeremy cheerfully whistling,

        “Isnt this great comrades?!!”

    • Cold baked beans, the many of a sailor has gone through.
      One must know how long provisions will sustain a long voyage.
      “I will survive”
      Thats what it is, basic provision and all Captains know this.
      Captains have no time for bullshit as time an tide waits for fucking no one.

  17. I’m no hard man in real life although I can get angry just like most people pissed off with someone or something. but I would probably run off or apologize profusely if cornered face to face.

    that said, I would get my own back by hacking into their phone, tablet or laptop using a remote control app that can be used undetected by anti virus apps and firewalls.

    always a pleasure to wipe a cunt’s hard drive by anonymous proxy and a good VPN.

    have done it three times to cunts I have really detested.
    Revenge is a dish best served with Python 3 and a dash of PureScript

    • Jesus Techno!!
      Staying on the right side of you!
      Didn’t understand half of it but anyone threatening me with a python?
      I’m off😁

      • Not only that, he sends a python with a manuscript (probably instruction snake language) to come and steal your hard drive.

        I’m only joking Techno, I think you’re a fantastic person. You should hear what the others on here say behind your back though…

    • Thats frighting Techno, it makes me afraid but i have an address for you and its not mine. its in the link below
      www. don’tpleasedon’t. mie.
      I am very nervous right now
      Be gentle as they know what they do

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