Lessons from the Past

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I have of late been reconsidering, revaluating morals that TV preached to me as youth.

Different strokes
A wealthy fruity Batchelor adopts two little ghetto black kids, in a kind act of early virtue signalling.
Think their parents were in prison or crack addicts or something?
Where was social services?!!
What were his real motives?
I can only guess.

Happy Days
A elderly Jewish midget starts to hang round some teenagers in a milk bar, he wins their confidence.
What do the parents do?
Invite him to live with them!!
To say the Cunningham’s were naive is a huge understatement.

Mork and Mindy
A ADHD coked up alien lands in a egg,
Mindy finds this annoying extraterrestrial,
Does she inform the authorities?
No.
Endangers the human race to space influenza,
Doesn’t tell anyone.
Luckily Mork didn’t infect anyone and went on to make the world laugh in ever increasingly funny films.
Everyone loved Robin Williams.

But the lessons from the carefree 70s are tantamount to reckless endangerment.
I’ll never trust TV again.

YouTube Link

Nominated by: Miserable northern cunt

 

74 thoughts on “Lessons from the Past”

      • Indeed MNC.

        Williams wasn’t funny. He just played Mork for the rest of his career. Found him insufferable.

        And the Fonz was as dodgy as.

        I keep hearing about them ‘reimagining’ old shows. Seems to mean remaking a show with loads of black people and gays.

        I wonder what the modern ‘reimagined’ Happy Days would look like?

        Be called ‘Thank you Nice Day’ and have local kebab shop owner, Abdul, offering ‘free’ kebabs and ciggies to the girls from the local care home.

        Oh wait…of course they’d never make that.

      • Robin was a massive coke head in the 70s CB.
        He was mates with John Belushi.

        He never calmed down,
        Hyper .
        Bad with his nerves.

        Bet he’s still twitching and gurning now?

        Shazbot.

      • Shazbot…
        I remember a pub fight back in the late 70’s/early 80’s where the winner, after decking the other bugger, gave him a couple of kicks to the refrain of ‘nanu fucking nanu ya cunt’.

        So, Mork&Mindy, truly an educational and vocabu(fucking)lary building show for some, but for moral degenerates like yr humble scribe here there was Pam Dawber…

      • I share traits with Ford Prefect with regard to sarcasrm, if I’m not looking for it I often fail to spot it.

      • Even Robin bailed the night John Belushi went on his mammoth bender and De Niro fucked off really early doors didn’t like the way it was going. Would have loved to have stayed in bungalow 4 but they wanted $2500 a night had to make due with a $500 suit where Johnny Depp shagged Lynsey Lohan.

      • I always thought Williams was an OTT cunt and a one trick pony.

        I’d have shagged that Mindy, mind….

  3. My favourite is still On The Buses.

    Two pensioners trying to sexually molest twenty year old girls..

    And they weren’t members of parliament.

    Or the royal family.

    Brilliant stuff.

    • ‘Jack’ had a dirty laugh. But ‘Stan’ was the real ‘catch’ because he drove the bus.

  4. I’ll be honest, Mindy (back in the day) would seriously get it.

    I’d certainly be more than happy to part her whiskers and give her a good pounding.

  5. JIM’LL FIX IT
    Good clean fun as our loveable National Treasure makes children’s dreams come true. Perfect.

  6. Morecambe and Wise used to share a bed, the dirty fuckers.
    The Two Ronnies liked dressing as wimminz on Saturday nights.
    Mind you, it was all much more innocent then. Nowadays BBC and ITV would be urging them to get up each other.

    • The Two Ronnies were ahead of the times, with the series within the show about women ruling the roost.

      • Laurel and Hardy often shared a bed. Sometimes in drag. They preferred each others company more than their wives, but that was good clean honest fun.back then. We never had the likes of say Eddie Izzard making a cunt of himself trying to do a Dick Emery impression.

  8. I quite liked ‘The Moomins’ strange Scandinavian hippos I think, with some other ‘characters’ thrown into the mix. Including one that was non-gender specific.

    There was also a tribe of wriggly white elongated eel type creatures called the Hattifateners, they looked a bit like giant sperm.

    Simple times.

    Didn’t Robin Williams die on a Bicycle?

    • Topped himself didn’t he?
      Well hung.
      I don’t want to speak ill of the dead but I’ll make an exception for him.
      Unfunny cunt.

  9. Great nom Miserable!

    I learned that as back in the 1980’s, governments still don’t give two shits about army vets and the A-Team are destined to remain soldiers of fortune.

    In 1984 CO2 levels peaked on the set of Knight Rider keeping David Hasselhoff’s perm stable.

    And crime does pay with the African American family in The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air affording a mansion, private schooling and an English butler.

  10. Are You Being Served could never be made today. Lampooning of effeminate poofery and constant references to Mrs Slocombe’s pussy……a disgrace!
    Of course they didn’t know that men can have vaginas back then.
    Dinosaurs!

    • I wonder if Mrs Slocombe had a thing for Captain Peacock. She would sometimes call him ‘Stephen’.

  11. I sometimes wonder what the fuck was going on with these ‘creative’ types in my 70s youth.

    Still, neither Tom Baker nor Derek Griffiths – my two favourite childhood stars – have been dragged into the cesspit of scandal that was/is the BBC.

  13. Can’t stand American comedy – shouty OTT actors (and especially actresses) gurning, yelling and playing to the non-existent studio ajudeince.

    For me nothing will ever come up to Steptoe and Son by Ray Galton and Alan Simpson or Brennand and Bottonley’s vehicle for Hylda Baker Nerarst & Dearest. I love good old fashioned smut and innuendo “Have you been, Walter?…… I think he’s been” or “Oh, you DIRTY old man”.

    Lond live Pledges Purer Pickles and the Shepherds Bush junk yard – ane we are unanious in that!

    • Steptoe was supreme. Never bettered.
      Till Death Us Do Part was another masterpiece.

      70s Coronnation Street was also untouchable.

  14. “Why Don’t You”….a collection of prissy little Wankers doing magic tricks or painting fucking pine-cones….Why Don’t You Just Fuck Off Before I Shove Your Swotty Head Down The Shitter…. Cunt” would have been my choice for it’s title.

    • Funny, I remember the title and that’s it. Not one thing about it. At all. Must have been fucking excellent.

      • As I recall, it was all swotty drama school kids telling us grubby council estate urchins to get up and do something boring.
        Total wank.

      • I never really saw Byker Grove,Harold.

        I don’t have whiskers like that..I’m rather suspicious of people who do…they are normally hiding something….an unhealthy interest in children judging by the look of that Cunt in the photo.

      • A quality response DFF.

        I doff my hat to you sir.

        I thought there was something a bit off about the Fonz.
        Why is a man in his 30s or 40s hanging around with teenage boys?

        Why does he keep asking them to go into his “office” which also happens to be a toilet?
        Bit suspect that.

      • I actually cunted The Fonz a couple of years ago….always suspected that he was a wrong ‘un.

  15. I watched with fascinating those short films usually b@w and ended with Fin.
    A lonely half wrecked dwelling in a remote baron landscape, and a whiter than white woman running away in a confused manner and falling to the grass and lots of wailing and moaning.
    Comedy gold but could never figure out WTF they were about.

  17. Imagine the modern “Dukes of Hazzard”…
    Bo and Luke (still cousins) would be married, Daisy Duke would be a huge buck ne9ro tran§bumder, with his bollocks hanging down either side of sexy denim cutoffs,
    Boss Hogg would be a 600lb Melissa McCartney, Roscoe P. Coltrane would be a leather body cage-wearing degenerate, sporting both brown and yellow handkerchiefs and the General Lee would be a Tesla with a rainbow fa99ot flag on the roof instead of the confederate one.

  18. Fucking hell, what a miserable bunch of cunts we are today. Hangover from the Queens period of morning is it?

    Robin Williams was a funny cunt in or out of take that! The Fonz was cooler than Elvis in the mortuary fridge! As for the two black kids living with the elderly cracker and his daughter? That’s the model for the Truss cabinet.

    I realise many of our contributors are still missing Vera and the blitz but you guys have to move with the times.

    Not to fear, I’m sure you’ll all cheer up when ration stamps are reintroduced and the lights are all turned off at night.

    • Williams character Mork put me off even considering watching anything he was starring in for years.
      Subsequently found many of his films to be excellent.
      Most recently enjoyed ‘One Hour Photo’ and ‘Insomnia’.

  20. Robin Williams always seemed to be trying too hard to be funny. Most of the time he was about as funny as a burning orphanage. When he croaked, all the faux compliments on how funny and how great he was. He wasn’t. As in the words of Tommy DeVito “Funny How?”

  21. High Chaparral. Randy Uncle Buck Cannon sniffing around older brother Big John’s son Blue-Boy & his wife Victoria.
    Lost In Space. Latent paedo Zachary Smith unnatural relationship with child Will Robinson. Why didn’t father Commander John Robinson tell him to f**k right off?
    Waltons. Was patriarch John Walton Sr. really that proud to have a sensitive limp lemon like John-Boy for a son?
    On The Buses. Two sexually inept middle-aged dirty old gits. Chasing around after young women half their age.

  22. rod hull and emu, what and irritating cunt rod hull was, and that stupid puppet, I heard that fat reg was good friends with rod hull, maybe he was also “friends” with Michael Barrymore, on account he had very long arms , and who knows, he might have been a regular party goer at one of Barrymore’s pool parties

    • Rumour has it that the damage inflicted upon Stuart Lubbock’s poor botty was done by Emu, although no-one knows if it was Rod Hull or Michael Barrymore operating the lubed-up puppet.

    • Emu was a god, EBC1 was my fav programme as a kid and he wasn’t at that cunt pool party. He did however chuck Hull off of the roof.

    • Emu’s Broadcasting Company was well funny. Billy Dainty was a mad old cunt, and when the Emu was psychotic and vindictive.

      The ITV one, poofy pink windmills, the dancing brats and Grotbags was total shite.

    • It would be good if they did a remake in a much darker tone, like Knight Rider where both Michael Knight and KITT are rapists.
      Or Metal Mickey, where the jolly robot transforms into a terminator and murders the surrounding children with a variety of kitchen cooking implements.

  26. Murphy’s Mob was good. Ken Hutchinson as the grumpy prototype-Fergie manager who ran the kids football team. King of the Castle was good and all. Creepy as fuck though…

  27. Kenny Everett on Thames was ace. Hot Gossip, Captain Kremmen, Sid Snot, Brother Lee Luv, and all that.

    The BBC one wasn’t as great, but it still had Cleo Rocos and her spectacular tits.

  28. A great nom MNC and harks back to the earlier days of ISAC.

    I remember my dad liking Mindy.
    He liked the look of Gloria Estefan too back in the 80s the dirty old bugger 😆

  29. Doesn’t Mork from Ork resemble U2 gobshite, Bonio? Both irritating cunts and all.

    The Fonz liked his schoolies, didn’t he? Proper jailbait magnet. Heeeeeey!

    Mrs C was a proper milf, mind.

    • A shame the real Mindy never did one back in the day. Mindy meets Marilyn Chambers. What a cracker that would have been….

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