Carefully Curated

I would like to nominate the use of that annoying and totally redundant phrase “carefully curated”. I see this phrase more and more and every time it makes me want to punch a hole in my computer screen.

This is a phrase used by cunts trying to sell useless shit. In the business of selling garden gnomes? Then why not enhance the perceived value by describing them as a “carefully curated collection of garden gnomes”. A restaurant specialising in cunt food recently described its menu as “carefully curated”. I see this phrase everywhere, being used to persuade gullible fools into buying garbage by creating an idea of exclusivity.

Firstly, these twats are not curators. The job of a curator is to preserve valuable cultural artefacts. These people are just cunts trying to flog useless shit.

Secondly, the phrase “carefully curated “ is a tautology. It suggests there is such a thing as ‘sloppily curating’, which is a contradiction in terms.

So be a good curator Admin, and add this noxious phrase and it’s users to your carefully curated collection of CUNTS.

Nominated by: Marvellous Mechanical Cunting Machine

60 thoughts on “Carefully Curated

  1. It seems this nomination has been carefully curated!

    Only joking, sorta 🙂

    • Ive genuinely never heard this phrase till now.
      But if I do I’ll know its a angle for some cunt trying a sales pitch.

      • Could this be a good sales pitch for your business: “Carefully Curated Removals”.

        Then again, the temptation to slap the sorts of twat that would buy into it, might be hard to resist.

  2. I bet the lady with the gloves will give Ruff Tuff the horn (like. He has in her hands😉)-he likes the more “boyish” figure😀

    This sounds like the natural progression for all those CUNTS using the phrase “Artisan”, to describe the sort of shite beloved of pretentious, metropolitan elites👎👎👎

    • In the same laugh exactly. Another noxious cunt phrase designed to appeal to soy boys. Artisanal bread – fuck off and give me Warburtons.

      • Same thing I meant – not laugh. Fuggin predictive text.

    • The figure looks about right.

      Not so keen on the boat race. That said, it’s not in Monks territory, so yes, I probably would.

      Afternoon General, afternoon all.

      • Hi Ruff, this boyish figure thing is confusing!
        Id say petite,slim, coquettish.
        But boyish conjures up images of you rogering Janette Krankie.
        She was/is a swinger you know?

      • “Boyish” to me, conjures up an image of a lady who is as flat as a witches tit😢

        Petite-slim is ok, but as every “cocksmith” knows, women with a few curves are much more fun in the bedroom👍

      • Slim, certainly. Petite, possibly. Coquettish, not necessarily.

        But you’re definitely in the right ball park Miserable.

      • Sadly Miles feels obliged to make an issue out of nothing.

        He is Igor to CS’s Frankenstein.

        And an especially simpering Igor at that.

      • Haha fair enough.

        I only took it as good-natured banter between yourselves, especially with the ‘yolkgate’ lark.

        It may be the whiskey I bought, thinking it was a good one, but now having tasted it remembering it is a shit one, talking, but let me take this opportunity to apologise for that whole Hasbara troll malarkey. I may well of grabbed the wrong end of the stick, but in fairness had just come out of one helluva battle royale with a genuine one on another site so was oversensitive.

        That is all.

        PS, The greatest trick Satan ever played was convincing the world he did not exist. The second greatest trick Satan ever played is pretending he is not Miles 😉

      • You’re in the same ball park in your thinking about the boyish figure Miserable.

        You’re in the right ball park in your thinking about the boyish figure Miserable.

        We’ve already established that the ball park we’re discussing is the boyish figure.

        So ‘the same ball park’ in this context is the subject of the boyish figure.

        There is a ‘choice’ of ball parks (subjects) using the ‘right’ ball park.
        The right ball park predisposes subjects other than the boyish figure.

        Just go to bed, FFS. – NA

      • @ TheBestRevengeIsLivingWell

        Apology accepted and reciprocated. My subsequent behaviour too was out of order.

  3. Curating and carefulness smack of colonialism and possibly even racism. Certainly mighty white tools of oppression. It is also too close to the idea of good husbandry not to be anti feminist in subtext. Best keep clear of this potential can of worms as it could lead to cancellations and upset. I fear that rioting may be an inevitable consequence of such insensitivity.

  4. I love it. This along with so many other annoying fucking phrases:
    Circle back…
    At the end of the day…
    Ok so…(when answering a question)
    I mean, like…
    Let’s put a pin in that for now…

  5. It’s a pompous cunt advertising phrase, hence the nom. The only things that should be curated are Ming vases, Rembrandts and the like. Pseudo-curators can fuck off

  6. Certainly the woman in the picture knows how to polish a horn, now she’s got to place it in her mouth and suck.
    Carefully curated. Haven’t seen it used but I definitely steer clear of anything that says artisan. Means it’s at least twice the price.

  7. ‘Contemporary’ is another one, as in contemporary adult music (itself shite).

    Contemporary to what?

  8. ‘Bespoke’ is the other one. Used to just mean genuine tailor made suits etc. Now it’s fucking any old shit. Coffins. Toothpaste. Doll’s houses. Kiss my tits.

    I don’t know why, but ‘craft beer’ annoys me too.

    Millennials mostly sip on these £8 ‘craft beers’. Beer for the gays. I’ve noticed that those buying them wear skinny jeans and take about 3 hours over a pint. They’re usually pissed after a pint of the shit too. Lightweights. Have a Babycham and throw a washing machine up your hoops and have done with it.

    Fuck off. Lager. Mild. Stout, IPA, Bitter.

    You’re only a man if you drink the above.

    • Coloured vinyl annoys me for some reason. Every cunt knows black is the best for LPs and 45s. Yet these millennial and hipster bellends will pay silly amounts for ‘limited edition coloured vinyl’. Most coloured albums sound like shit, but cunts still lap it up. When Paul McCuntney put out his last album out in about ten different colours, knobheads bought it in droves (that’s why he did it. So it would go to No.1, the cynical old cunt). Surely a record is all about how good it sounds, not if it’s a pretty colour or any of that crap. What a load of shit.

      • Oddly enough, my Da had a bright yellow 7″ of Noggin the Nog. It was pd good as well.
        The sad cunts should’ve been “carefully curetted” well before birth, and the glopp fed to the pigs.

    • What about single malt? I contribute 10% of Scotland’s GDP on the fucking stuff!

      • Yes, spirits are fine. I was talking about beers, I didn’t make that clear though due to ranting.

    • I used to think that about craft beer Cuntybollocks, and there is some awful craft beers that taste like pine detergent sold in the supermarkets. Can’t deny they are expensive, but there is a beer shop where I live that does mainly craft ales and you can get some fantastic imperial stouts, usually somewhere between 9% and 14% ABV. Certainly men’s beers.
      Personally I can’t see why anyone would drink lager. Fizzy piss.

      • My grandad wouldn’t drink lager because it was German, and my dad wouldn’t drink lager because he saw it as a ladies drink.

        Myself? Joey Holt’s or Boddies.

      • I used to love Boddies when you could get it on draft Norman, pre Mel Sykes ‘Do you want a flake with that?’
        Drank it in tins for awhile, but taste buds have evolved over the years and prefer fewer but stronger ales.
        Can the original style still be got on draft Norman? Haven’t seen it for years, so I presume not.

      • Some pubs in Mcr still have Boddies (at least they did before the Chinki Flu), Fish Mitten. But it’s no longer brewed at Strangeways Brewery, and the best version available now is the Boddies sold in glass bottles. They can still be found in certain shops and taste better than the cans.

      • Fish Mitten
        Up until the china virus I was drinking Boddies draught in a pub in Stockport.
        Dont know if the pub survived?
        Proper old school boozer,
        Want food?
        Crisps nuts pork scratching,
        Take yer pick.

      • It was a friend of mine who had a daughter that lived in Bollington? that came back to Chelmsford singing the praises of Boddingtons and the landlord of our local pub ( a proper free house) was able to order some. One of the best lighter beers I’ve ever had, though Robinson’s did a great paler beer as well. Up with Fullers Bengal Lancer.
        Great to hear that it can still be got on draught MNC, and bottles, Norman. I may try and see if I can get bottles online. Never quite the same with the widget in a can.
        Currently getting through my delivery from Green Jack brewery from Lowestoft. Bottles are 750ml and they do some good beers as well. The Baltic Trader, is one of my faves. 10.5%, so one bottle is normally enough.

      • Spookily, Phil the Greek’s favourite tipple was Boddington’s bitter…

  9. My favourite hate is ” blue sky thinking “, closely followed by ” thinking outside the box ”
    Every time I hear either of these expressions I want to
    A. Drop the idiot out of a plane sans parachute, shouting ” enjoy the blue sky, you cunt!”
    B. Nail the cunt inside the fucking box! Then lower it into a 6ft deep hole and fill it in with a backhoe.

  10. B. Nail the cunt inside, Admin, please correct.

    Done. FFS – It’s not as if I haven’t got some Killing Joke to listen to plus a beer on the go. Phew! Night Admin’s work is never done. Meanwhile Day Admin is tucked up in bed dreaming of ladyboys. Don’t tell him I told you about that. 😉 – NA

  11. “With the greatest respect..” is another thing cunts say. It’s always followed with an insult.

    “With the greatest respect, you stink.”

    “With the greatest respect, everybody hates your guts.”

    “With the greatest respect, your mother should’ve kept the afterbirth and thrown you away.”

    You catch the drift.

    If you’re going to insult me just call me a cunt. I hate weasel word cop outs.

    • “put that thing away you dirty p£rv£rt! Im phoning the police!”
      Change the record.

    • ‘In my humble opinion’ is another one. Most people that say it are about as humble as Hitler and it is the hallmark of a complete cunt. Same goes for cunts who say ‘Is it me, or…’ like that horse faced cunt, Miranda. Cuntspeak par excellence.

      Also, I passionately hated any twat that used that stuipid fucking Wayne’s World speak in the 90s. Saying things like ‘That was a really great film – NOT!’ instead of just saying they didn’t like it. Fucking irritating punchable cunts.

  12. Have you not considered Bullshit Bingo? Did it to a cunt of a boss who was droning on with these shite phrases. Lack of sleep made me bellow, Bingo, Bullshit Bingo full house. Oh dear, that went down like the Wilhelm Gustloff. Had a bollocking for that.

    • An irreverent forester played BS bingo at an exhaustingly pompous conference. After the third shout they arksed him to leave, 20 others of us did as well.

  13. On the other hand
    Here come the seagulls gets a thumbs up.
    I don’t know where this expression originated, or by whom, but I tip my hat!
    Makes me snigger every time.

  14. Seagulls, Moderator.

    Senior management.
    Fly in from Germany, China, Switzerland or wherever, who knows?

    Make loads of noise, shit on everyone, then fly away.

  15. Any restaurant that uses ‘real’ or ‘authentic’ can also fuck off. The Real Greek for one. Chicken Tikka Masala is about as Indian as BW&C.

  16. Here is some more of the same:

    Safe haven
    Past history
    Deliberately targeted
    If it’s in stock we have it
    Close proximity
    Forward planning

  17. Oh here’s a good one: “Made in U.S.A”. Bullshit! Assembled maybe but very little is fucking made here anymore. All components and materials come from somewhere else and if an American touches it during the process it can be labeled “Made in U.S.A”.
    Oh yes and “I’ll REACH OUT and see and I can CONNECT with ______.”
    Pft. Cunts.

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