Gogglebox (2)

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‘And in Wiltshire Giles and his wife Mary’, ‘And in Derby the Siddiquis’. ‘In Hull Jenny and best mate Lee’.

Fucking Craig Cash’s moronic gormless- sounding voiceover. As though he’s talking to some idiot child. Come to think he’s made gormlessness his forte. His character was in The Royal Family. I did hear that Caroline Aherne would get frustrated with him because he was in reality gormless. Mind you she had some anger issues if what ‘Hookey’ said about her is true.

Another thing about it is how CAREFUL they are when talking about some POLITICAL news item. I mean the families are supposed to be representative of the whole country,-race, class, sexuality. But they’re all Leftish. Universal scorn when there was a piece about Sir Nigel.

You have the two Gays. How cosy they are with their very expensive looking pedigree hounds. He got rid of his old Gay and has got a new younger one.

One thing though that female vicar has gone. Sat there in her pajamas- her huge slippers on, her leg over hubby who never said anything.

Yes, that’s it. It was sold to us that these are people in the most natural setting and they are free to say what they want. But they’re not really. They play up to the camera as in any other setting.

Finish up. They sometimes show them watching an old film. Yes they’re they all were huddled up on the couch, knees clasped, eyes wide open, mouth open …at….wait for it…. ‘Jaws’.

My jaw dropped as well at all the fucking acting going in.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic

53 thoughts on “Gogglebox (2)”

  1. I know Craig Cash Miles!
    Hehehe, a customer of mine!
    Never seen googlebox have a inkling I’d not like it?
    Especially the siddiquis!
    I might like it if the siddiquis are starting in a live action remaking of Jaws!
    Watching the sea turn red with them screaming….

    • Craig Cash was excellent in Early Doors….think he and “Duffy” wrote it too.
      One of the few recent comedy series worth watching,,but Two Doors Down had it’s moments.

      • I didnt watch it Dick, but the pub they film it in I know well.
        Little backstreet boozer.
        Life on Mars filmed in Stockport too.

      • Early Doors was excellent. Nothing around to touch it although Vera is often fucking hilarious.

      • Early Doors was bloody brilliant yes. Probably the most underrated and underexposed comedy series ever. Pure gold.

        I’ve got the DVDs of both series and regularly have another watch. 👍🏻

  3. At least that miserable old Cunt Leon is no longer able to spout his views…there was also an incredibly fat Father and Daughter combo. who seem to have gone…I like to think that they choked on Leon after crushing him to death at some cast-party and cannibalising him.

    It’s all scripted…not the spontaneous remarks that they pretend.

    • Dick, you watch reality tv?

      Doesn’t your butler change the channel when such plebeian filth comes on your (no doubt vast) television?

      • I often just have the telly on in the background,Mike….don’t know why,the odd time that I actually take notice of it, it irritates me.

        PS…when I say “telly” I actually mean cinema worthy,top of the range entertainment centre…I’m hoping to work out how to get porn on it….the thought of a 12 foot fanny that isn’t Katie Price’s intrigues and titillates me.

        Morning Mike
        Morning All

      • Ever thought of investing in a radio?

        My late grandmother used to leave the tv on for company. Are you turning into Joan Hickson?

      • To be honest I can’t imagine that porn would be very exciting on the radio.

        Joan Hickson gives me the horn.

      • Since Joan Hickson died in 1998 aged 92, your use of the present tense disturbs me.

        I sometimes wonder what doesn’t give some of the degenerates on this website the horn.

      • I think Fiddler was to have featured in a now unseen episode until Craig Cash uttered “Meanwhile in Northumberland, Dick Fiddler and the hounds settle in to watch RuPaul’s Drag Race UK”….

  4. I must admit I have never seen this contrived programme, but I loathe Craig Cash’s voice – he sounds as dim as a 2 watt light bulb.

    I mean no disrespect to my fellow cunters, as I know some come from the North of England, so forgive me, but I get really pissed off listening to so many of those bloody Labour tarts usually shadow ministers who all sound alike – Laura Pidcock must do the voices for all of them. Then, just to show I am not sexist, you have the airy fairy voices of Jon Ashworth and Richard Burgeon, who also sound the same.

    The idea of Gogglebox seems totally phoney – “ad lib” remarks probably scripted to within an inch of their lives – like all other reality shows, it should get done under the Trades Description Act

    • Morning WC,
      Johnathan Ashworth pushes my buttons too, its that little nervous snidey laugh, makes me want to go Peter Sutcliffe on him.
      But the sound of northern lasses is what angels must sound like!

      “Ee up, welcome t heaven chuck”😁

      • Ps
        When I said ‘go Peter Sutcliffe on him” I meant leather his head with a claw hammer,
        Not sexually assault him!

        Just to clarify.

      • 🎶
        Bang, bang, Miserable’s pig-iron hammer
        Came down upon Ashworth’s head
        Doo-doo-doo-doo-dah 🎶

      • Damn. That Beatles reference has given me the urge to play some classic Beatles vinyl👍

      • I’ve got a first press black and gold label Please Please Me LP, valued at over £1000 last time I looked, if you’re interested CG?

  5. I used to love this when it first started……laughing at the dimmos. But you soon get tired of listening to the inane drivel coming out of their stupid gobs and the laughter turns to anger.
    I occasionally tune in just to see Giles and Mary. Mary is as thick as a plank and Giles ( one of the funniest blokes on the telly) rips the piss out of her and she has no idea what he is doing. I doubt if he gets much action out of her and she would bore the fuck out of a dead squirrel but Giles’s subtle put downs and perfect comic timing can have me rolling on the floor laughing. You’d think one of her friends would tell her what he is doing but, presumably, they are all as dumb as she is.

    • They call each other ‘Nutty’. She’s always bursting into tears at the state of the world. Blubbing up if the Queen’s comes on. I remember her once about the young saying – ‘they’re all on their mobile phones watching porn’.

      I am Mary.

  6. A dumbed down nation showing a telly program about its dumbed down audience, way to go, it’s hardly surprising we’re so easily duped.
    Thick,morbid cunts.

    • The other week a new show was on telly, ‘Britains best woodworker’.
      I’ll watch that I thought, im always making stuff from wood
      (Kitchen, doors,fence etc)
      It had the first episode then got cancelled because one of the contestants had a tattooed face and someone had complained they were far right symbols.
      Cancelled the whole show.😀

      • “Following an independent investigation, AETN UK has made the decision not to broadcast any further episodes of The Chop on Sky HISTORY. A contestant’s tattoos included symbols that could be connected to far-right ideologies and could cause offence; we sincerely apologise for that and we are sorry that our processes did not prompt further investigation at an earlier stage. The contestant continues to strenuously deny that he has, or ever had, far-right leanings. We are thoroughly reviewing our internal processes following the investigation. AETN UK and Sky HISTORY stand against racism and hate speech of all kinds.”

        So 1 viewer has decided the fate of a show because virtue signalling controllers got scared. “Could be connected”, well that’s not open to interpretation, I’m guessing it wasn’t a swastika, even those dumb fucksticks might have recognised that. I wonder what these symbols were?

      • The number 88.
        No joke,
        Bloke said his grandad died in 1988 so it was a memorial,
        They say it was eighth letter of the alphabet H, so HH =heil Hitler.
        Numbers are well racist if you cant count!!

      • Well I thought he looked nice with his coloured in face,
        Festive!😀
        Hoping hed get his own show,
        ‘the 88 show’ where he uses his carpentry skills to terrify people!

      • Surely if the tattoo was on his arm he could have put a long sleeve shirt on to cover it up.

      • Perhaps the other contestants or the makers didn’t relish having a sworn enemy of this country on their programme.

  7. What even is this shite? I have never heard of it.

    Is it a show about people using Google to find Pornhub?

  8. Never seen it. Never will. The concept, as I understand it is –

    Shite TV
    Being watched by cunts
    Being watched by more cunts.

    ????

  10. Craig Cash fuck yes what a plank to listen to. Mind you, even his old mucker Aherne came over sounding all gormless on that show.

    Early days I used to watch it just to imagine myself in flagrante delicto with that young bottle blonde Manc bird and her sister. But by Christ she’s clearly been the donut shop’s best customer in recent years and is now a frightful sight.

    PS Anyone have Jan nee James Morris in the Pool? Nothing new in Trannyism but jeez what a life! Small but significant role in Everest 1953 , 5 kids and a sex change!!

  11. I can’t think of anything more banal that watching cunts watching shit tv. Like eating cat shit with broken glass in it.

  12. I have “watched” from a distance-in the rare occasion other family members have been watching.
    My observations were:

    -Channel 4 so a diversity fest
    -the people bring filmed all unbelievably ugly
    -all on display sub 100 iq
    -WHY?

    As a nation, have we become so voyeuristic, that watching people, watching television is considered entertainment?
    It’s cheap, dull and lazy.

    Television=chewing gum for the eyes😒

  13. A television programme of people watching television programmes? You what?

    Why does the narrator sound drippy? I reckon in real life he talks like Brian Blessed. 🙂

  15. That gay bloke in the picture (green tee shirt) lives me, I’ve seen him loads of times in our High Street. Right fucking mincer he is. Wouldn’t need to wear a tee shirt with a rainbow on it as it is so obvious. I know we have recently cunted Tom Allen, but at least he has the decency to wear a suit.

  17. What is this garbage, a Teams ™ podcast or something?
    Identify neighbouring skip with spare space.
    Insert television.
    Take up knitting or similar brainstretching activity.
    Thank me for giving you your life back.

  18. I’m sorry but I can’t cunt this as I actually like this programme. It only occasionally swings left but is mostly honest.

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