The Cornish

The Cornish

A big Cornish Cream Tea cunting for that bunch of Stasi Nimbyies in Cornwall. We don’t want Gordon Ramsey here the Cornish cry, we don’t want any second home owners here bringing SARS-Cov-2, we don’t want any second home owners period.

I’m rather miffed with the treatment of Gordon Ramsey. Now he’s not everyone’s cup of tea but what exactly has he done wrong? Gone to his second home in Cornwall before lockdown was announced in order to see it out there. He takes his exercise by riding his bike. Apparently the Coast Guard gave Gordon a warning for being 25 miles from home on his bike. Well firstly, there is no radius restriction on how far you can ride your bike, secondly 25 miles on a bike isn’t that far, and thirdly the Coast Guard can fuck off. What’s their part in the daily dinghy arrival, eh? Then the Cornish have been moaning that he goes out more than once a day. Well who gives a rat’s in the middle of nowhere? Its not like he stops to hug everyone he sees.

Meanwhile the Daily Panic Mail revels in Gordon’s misdemeanours whilst their readers comment like brainwashed morons that Gordon is an arrogant millionaire for being in Cornwall or riding his bike!

Apparently the Cornish call outsiders ‘ants’ or ’emmets’. How rude. Well there’s no tin left or whatever it is you used produce. With the attitude you have against outsiders, you’ll have no tourism left either. There’s no law against having a second home and its too bad house prices have risen and priced out your Cornish underclass from owning a home. Happens everywhere, why is Cornwall so bloody special?

Please nobody go to Cornwall again and let them stew in a demise of their own making. Their pasties give me heartburn and I can do without mead thanks. I’ll clot my own cream if I need to.

Nominated by Cuntologist

56 thoughts on “The Cornish

  1. Ive always had a thing against the Cornish cunts.

    Driving around with their KERNOW stickers all over the car just to shout to everyone who sees them “LOOK WHERE IM FROM!”

    Its the most economically deprived county in Britain.

    Fuck off you inbred yokel cunts.

  2. What’s got 26 teeth and is 400 foot long?
    The Aldi queue in Padstow.

  3. Cornwall is full of trustafarian vegan cunts. Plus that utter cunt Hugh Fearnly twattingstall. What a cunt he is.

    • Im not sure either way on this, I wouldnt want Gordon Ramsey next door either, and can see how if your family have lived in a small community for 100yrs an some surfing cunt from London gazumps you and you cant afford to live there while Hawaii 5.0 stay there 2wks a year, must piss you off.
      Although at a service station in the lake district was a Cornish Pasty place, an they wanted £8 a fuckin pasty!!
      Cheeky cunts.
      So fuck it, yes the cornish are slack jawed inbred banjo strummers and can stick their overly expensive baked goods up their arses.

      • The pasties are rather good in one shop in Tavistock I seem to remember Northern. Havnt had Labcashire stockpot yet. Avoiding it

      • Every pasty ive ever had was fine by me Smug, but not at £8, I wouldnt pay that in ransom for the kids never mind a pasty.
        Lancashire hotpot?
        Try it mate! Gorgeous stuff, id marry it if I was single, food that fills.

  4. There were plans to make a crime series for TV.
    It would have been called CSI Cornwall, but the producers scrapped the idea when they realised no one had dental records, and they all shared the same DNA.
    I love Cornwall for holidays but the locals are strange cunts to say the least.

  5. I suppose if it’s all right for members of the royal family to fuck off to their second, third, or fourth castles, then it’s all right for Mr. Ramsey to fuck off to his considerably more modest second home.
    Get To Fuck.

  6. Cornwall and Devon are both area of high NIMBY cuntitude. They don’t mind grabbing all the money from tourists despite loathing them for daring to enter god’s own country.

    Well they can shove their Cornish pasties and cream teas up their arrogant arseholes.

    Fuck them

    • Wish I had a second home.
      Wish I had a cream tea for that matter, absolutely lovely.
      Famous for crabs too arent they?
      But thats the price you pay for being promiscuous.

  7. They want the place to themselves but depend on fishing (fucked)..Tin (fucked)…Tourism (raging like a hormonal teenager)….not like the good people of Yorkshire…..or Herefordshire ….or …erm Cheshire (see thy is online MNC) ….now where is Dios cottage again? CUNTS!

    • Afternoon Daz👍
      Dios cottage is down there isnt it?
      Wonder if he knows Gordon?
      Well when I stay with the family, (10th -17th July)
      Ill shout to mr Ramsey “oi Popeye! Keep the noise down!
      Dios told me about your shenanigans!
      You staying after us?
      Get in quick gets booked up in the summer holidays!☺

    • ‘the good people of Yorkshire’ is a step to far for me. And I suspect MNC lives in Alderey Edge or Prestbury not Stockport, the posh fucker. Dio spends most of his time on cruises so is probably stranded just off Bangldesh.

      • And fishing is fucked due to the EU, and hopefully going to thrive again.

      • I wish CC, most of my work and best payers round there, im in Stockport, near to New mills.

  8. I don’t want all the fucking riff-raff of the world living near me. But still they come – Romanian cunts, Polish cunts, African cunts, you-name-a-shithole-of-the-world cunts. They’re all here. If I complain, I’m a racist. Most people who say they are Cornish seemed to have moved there a few years ago. I went there once and couldn’t see what all the fuss is about. Oh well, perhaps you would like to have some of the new-English who have moved in round here – then you’d really have something to complain about.

    • Romanians, Polish, Ukrainians, Lithuanians, and Africans would turn the Atlantic coastline grey with their filth. Those cockroaches make the Cornish look civilised.

  9. In any case involving Ramsey I am going to take the other side whether it be the Cornish or even the fucking Taliban.
    My brother in law lives in Falmouth and he is a cunt but not as big a cunt as Gordon fucking Ramsey.
    The Cornish have had their houses made unavailable to them due to second homing cunts like Ramsey pushing up the prices. They are out on a limb – no option to commute to earn a decent living. Fuck Ramsey and his ilk.

    • I know a Welshman who’s got a holiday cottage.
      In Wales.
      Bugger me, that is so feckin imaginative.

      • Give me address and the sons of Glendower, or perhaps Windsor Davies, will burn the fucker down.

    • Spot on although I fucking hate Gordon Ramsey For the record the cunt has 3 second homes in Cornwall 👎

  10. Weirdo, celtic bumpkins high on tiffin and fucking their sisters.
    Independence? Don’t even have a referendum, we’d better glad to see the back of you and your shitty, barren tin mines.

  11. I think this is just about certain cunts having a personal dislike of Ramsey. I have a certain sympathy as I used to hate the fucker. Then I found out he’s a Brexiteer , wants to restrict immigration and has a long running feud with Jamie Oliver whom he calls a “luvvie” and regularly digs out for being a mong lipped, window licking cunt.
    So i’ve changed my mind. The Cornish can all fuck off. Stick it to ‘em Gordon!

    • ‘a mong lipped, window licking cunt’…

      Perfect description of Jamie Oliver.

  12. I don’t blame them, I as a former kitchen cunt find him funny and fair but you can’t trust Jocks with a Pommy accent or an Ocker one either, very shifty except for Her late Maj the QM.

  13. The holiday destination of biddies.

    Pleasant scenery but that’s about it. Every seaside village offers the same: a beach or a quay, a seafood restaurant owned by a Londoner, somewhere were you can buy pasty and chips and a café or vendor selling clotted cream at a fiver a tub.

    I don’t understand why my parents keep going back. After two holidays as a kid I felt we’d seen all it had to offer. Pick the wrong week and everywhere is dead, including the model village.

    If you want a shorter trip for the sun and beach and somewhere were you can ogle tits nearer the owner’s chin than their cunt, grab some food that isn’t a pasty or some form of cream and get on the lash without being overcharged, get down to Bournemouth.

    Cornwall can stick its overrated pasties up its inbred arse.

    • I’ve been to Bournemouth beach with family a couple of times. It’s a lovely place.

  14. have a look at the queues of cars in devon – near woolacoombe i think – locals out with police to fine traffic in logjam outside town – they don’t want people to go there either – well fuck devon too is what i say – oes this ‘virus’ have majic properties so it can jump from car to car – the people are fucking mad

  15. I’m surprised nobody’s said “ooh aaahr” yet.
    2 things for me here is, if I’d felt forced out of the opportunity to buy a home because some strangers have grabbed all available,pushed the prices up and then only visit 1 month a year I’d be a tad aggrieved.
    But who was it who sold the property in the first place and trousered a load of dosh if not a blessed citizen of beloved ‘Kernow’.
    Let ‘Kernow’ support itself, gain independent status and see how it gets on without the emmet shilling.
    Ramsey may be a cunt but Rick Steins a bigger cunt and a mahoosive luvvie to boot,he can stick it up his stargazy, the straw sucking hick.

  16. Strange lot the Cornish. Apparently a lot of them don’t want to recognised as English/British but as a Celtic ethnic group. That’s the ones whose mother is also their sister.

  17. Yikes! Think I better lie low in this ‘ere fred. 😀

    A good sword and a trusty hand!
    A merry heart and true!
    King James’s men shall understand
    What Cornish lads can do!
    And have they fixed the where and when?
    And shall Trelawny die?
    Here’s twenty thousand Cornish men
    Will know the reason why!

    And shall Trelawny live?
    Or shall Trelawny die?
    Here’s twenty thousand Cornish men
    Will know the reason why!
    Out spake their Captain brave and bold:
    A merry wight was he:
    Though London Tower were Michael’s hold,
    We’ll set Trelawny free!
    We’ll cross the Tamar, land to land:
    The Severn is no stay:
    With “one and all,” and hand in hand;
    And who shall bid us nay?

    And shall Trelawny live?
    Or shall Trelawny die?
    Here’s twenty thousand Cornish men
    Will know the reason why!
    And when we come to London Wall,
    A pleasant sight to view,
    Come forth! come forth! ye cowards all:
    Here’s men as good as you.
    Trelawny he’s in keep and hold;
    Trelawny he may die:
    Here’s twenty thousand Cornish bold
    Will know the reason why

    • What a pile of old tripe Come upto Mansfield and see what true Englishmen with longbows can do The same as what we did to the French Knights wasted them Stick to making Cornish Pasties👎👎👎

  18. Playing Mathers, loud @20:00 – drowning out the noise from the virtue signalling brainwashed seals.
    White trash who fought racism, respect.
    Rotter I am – with big speakers! 😀💥

  19. Bunch of Cousin lovers, Playboy fisher men and Troglodyte ex Tin miners.

  20. Bloody fine attitude for a county which depends almost entirely on tourism. OK, visitors can’t spend money there at the moment but a lot won’t bother going back if they are made to feel unwelcome. The cornish don’t own the fucking beaches or coastline anyway.

    They haven’t had any sort of industry since Poldark”s era. Apart from overpriced pasties that is. And Rick Stein”s equally overpriced fish and chip restaurant which is shut up. Wish it’s owner would as well. He put the smug in smugglers. Git.

    Isn’t Cornwall the only county never to have a football league club? Truro City is their top team.

  21. Cornwall is where posh, rosy faced, smug cunts with dreadlocks go surfing

  22. Mate of mine said there’s a saying in Cornwall when you go batshit crazy.
    “Going Bodmin” I think.
    Been once. Can’t say I cared much for the place.

  23. 25 miles on a bike isn’t far ? It’s far enough, especially when there’s another 25 coming back. Unless of course, you’re planning a one way trip.

  24. If so against the second home brigade why did so many Cornish people sell great uncle Toms little house in the village to some cunt from Islington. Filthy money that’s why, make a few quid that’s why, there are few properties for locals to buy cos you greedy fuckers flogged them for over the top prices to line your fucking pockets. The same has occurred in most small towns and villages. What was once most likely rented farm workers cottage going for some stupendous price and dickheads bidding on it cos they so need to re discover the rural idly then whinge about the church bells and the smells when owld Pete puts ten ton of shite on his field. You got a problem with second homers go and twat the cunt who sold the home.

  25. Fan or not i wouldn’t give a fuck if Gordon lived next door to me.

    I dont think he would make any impact on the region, and would probably keep to himself.

    Lets hope he sells up and some Arabs, Russians or Bongo Greaseball Footballers move in to his abode (As they would be the only other cunts who could pay for it) and start to take over – cunts will be begging for him to come back.

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