Online Dance Parties

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Online Dance Party is a cunt!

Does our collapsing society know no bounds when it comes to cuntitude?

No sooner has BoJo closed the pubs and clubs (including ‘Spoons), that the stupid masses take to CuntBook and GoogleCunt Hangouts to gurn like idiots, and prance about like Wayne Sleep with itching powder in his codpiece – along with other like-minded imbeciles – in online group chats cos…ME! ME! ME! IT’S ALL ABOUT ME! LOOK AT ME!!!

Prosecco skanks, soy simps (hoping a skank will notice), Fosters fuckwits, and various alphabet people acting out tropes of themselves, with Wham! blaring away in the background, all because they can’t go out with their friends (and then completely ignore them as they remain zombie transfixed with whatever smart device is glued to their hands).

“Yaaayyy! We’re all going to die! Yaaayyy!”

The COVID-19 virus is not selective but watching those morons makes me wish it had facial recognition and raise the country’s IQ points by culling these “hard of understanding” fuckwits!

Cunts!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

115 thoughts on “Online Dance Parties”

  1. Funnily enough, watching the news this morning i saw this, some blue haired bint who described herself as a ‘raver’ wearing a captain’s hat and dancing to rave music, her kid too.
    What struck me most apart from how annoyingly upbeat this simpeton was,
    Was that her garden was fuckin massive!!
    Bet shes a socialist i thought they tend to look like shit and have nice bank balances.
    The cunt.

  2. Can say that I’ve never heard of this phenomenon. I find the idea of socialising online, by definition, contradictory. I can just imagine if I told my wife I was meeting my friends tonight then fucking off upstairs to the desktop with a glass, bottle of gin and some tonic.

  3. That Joe Wicks is a total cunt. Prancing around on YouTube like a total mincer. As camp as Tom Daly and not even buff enough to wank off to.

    Needs a fucking haircut he does the limp wristed to twat.

    • He gets yer average PE teacher a very bad name…and Dog alone knows, that’s difficult.

  4. Passed me by, thank fuck. I might be interested in formation wanking though.

  5. During the 2nd World War, the British public dug their heels in and fought, supported, starved, sheltered and all the while still kept their dignity.

    During COVID-19, the British public lost their minds over toilet roll and desperately sought maximum validation and attention from people online who they have largely never met.

    You wanted proof that this country is irreversibly fucked? You got it.

    • Dear Fiddler, I thought as Thane of North Humberland you would have played the Northumbrian pipes. They sound a bit thin and reedy to me but I´m used to the mighty thunder of the real bagpies played just up the road from where you are. Incidentally, that area used to belong to us but we gave it to the English at the Treaty of York simply because we could not abide their idea of what pipes should sound like.

      This is what ISACers are missing if they are not familiar with the music that resounds through Fiddler Towers every night as he devours wild boar and throws the bones to his slavering Hounds.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVUW7FpR_l4

      • Audio-only is much better all round; you don’t have to see the silly gurning and preening. This goes for classical music just as much.
        As for somebody who appears to be squeezing Hagrid’s scrote with a couple of old school recorders shoved up it, I can happily forget the audio, too.
        Alastair Campbellend is also a fucking wanker, the cunt.

    • I couldn’t agree more with that statement ECB.
      They really are an insufferable generation of pillocks.
      Generation Cunto.

    • Too right ECB, we are a different species to the British that stood alone in 1940. Whimpering twats…

  6. Let’s be honest Covid-19 has gifted us so many cunting opportunities.

    It’s like a fucking Turkey shoot.

    I’m quite enjoying watching it play out.

    Last week there was a cunting called ‘Coronavirus Doogooders’ and it was ahead of the curve but on the money.

    There’s so much more to come, the minute I heard about ‘clap for carers’ I got excited as I knew a proper hard core cunting was coming and I wasn’t let down.

    Great cunting Rebel!

  7. Dancing of any kind (with the exception of the octopus dance of course!) should only be practised by chappies with grass skirts to greet us as we invade!
    A well known English historical fact that one!

    • Remember Lionel Blair (Tonys brother) couldnt stop that cunt dancing!
      An Roy Castle.
      Any excuse they were off,
      Showbiz blood.
      ‘Can you sit down please mr castle im afraid its inoperable cancer”…
      Tap,tap,tap,tap..jazz hands.

      • I’m practising my ‘soul moves’ again Miserable. Just done a ‘spin’, gonna attempt a ‘back drop’ later.
        Body popping I think was your era,? Swivelling around on the floor like that, acting like a robot? You could recapture your youth again?
        Mr Fiddler doing his head hanging, giving it his all with the ‘air guitar’ Nurse Cunty The Twist in her ‘new look’ Dior dress. Same with B&W giving it ‘laaarge’ in his John Travolta white suit. Even RT can join in with a ‘modern dance’ interpretation of Stockhausen.

      • Northern Soul was massive where I grew up Miles(still is)
        Remember on the off licence a huge heart painted on the wall saying ‘wigan casino’.
        My mate (dead now) used to do all the soul moves, great to watch!!
        Dobie Gray he danced to.

      • Don’t forget to book “Dominic Grieve and his soul organ” – he needs the money for a sparkly sequined jacket, for the laydees 😃

      • A genuine question here….how many Cunters can play (to a reasonable standard) a musical instrument?…I certainly can’t,but admire people who can…except for Mr. Polly on his bagpipes,of course.

      • Evening Dick, Telly as it is plays blues guitar quiet well I think.
        Like you wish I did.
        The lad who works for me plays guitar well, was in a band an toured in states, canada, got ripped off & disillusioned.
        I know the drummer in 10cc an he said the lad was really good.
        Imagine that?
        Doing that, then ending up sat in a van listening to my road rage an racism.

      • My own oboe, of course. One is not afflicted with the gayness. No need to release the hounds.

      • I forgot HBH playing on his organ…..a sight and sound to behold,I’m sure.

      • Evening, M’Lord.
        HBH and organ available for wedding nite’s.
        Bulk discunts available…

      • I thought that you might play the washboard or spoons,MNC.

      • Id happily have a go.
        Nearly bought a mandolin off a bloke couple of years ago, but commonsense uncharacteristically prevailed!
        Apparently theyre hard to learn and as i look like
        Hagrid from Harry potter i might get the piss taken.😁

      • Miserable is one of those one-man-band musicians, harmonica , pedal drum and Morris dancer style bells on his shoes.

      • I can play guitar, bass, and a bit of keyboards, enough to record a bit. Was in a couple of bands in the 80s and 90s, had the time of my fucking life.

      • “GJ……I’d have liked to do that…can just see myself as some Bon Scott style singer…probably have ended up the same way too.

      • @DF I used to play the trumpet at a Grade 8 level but stopped when I went to university, never touched it again. Would have loved to start it again (and it would have had to be from scratch, takes a while to develop an embouchure) but asthma precludes that, sadly.

      • Moggie…. A lot of people seem to have started at school. I went to several schools (mercifully brief sojourns at most of them) but don’t remember any of them teaching musical instruments.

      • Dicky, when I was at school I played both the French horn and tenor horn. I stopped playing when I left school.

      • I was one half of The Lillyput Men 1971-1982, credited with ‘vocalisation, instrumental profanity and tape manipulation’.

        I also wrote most of the words to our 400+ songs, which are safely preserved on tape and transferred to CD-R.

        Been thinking of uploading them on youtube for years but haven’t been arsed to learn how to do it.

      • Moggie, one of my recording engineers wrote something lovely in one of his CD booklets…”JS Bach had 20 children, and played the trumpet”…
        It’s a bit of a chicken-and-egg thing, isn’t it ?

  9. Leave em do it. The cunts are starved of attention and going nuts.

    Psst.. you can still exercise in a park.

    Still, no cameras there, i suppose.

    • They say we’re supposed to stay 26ft away from each now (a long truck). Bit tricky when everyone keeps going to the park.

  10. I’ve been practicing Irish dancing, (see the coro virus topic).
    It’s forking hard especially standing on tip toes.

  11. Ah… just what the fuckwit ordered.

    J’adore a spot of trippin’ the light fantastic in my drawing room of a Saturday night.

    NOT! 😡

    • Rtc@
      Know your a massive music fan but can you dance?
      Women love a man who can dance!
      Ask any theyll tell you.
      Unfortunately I look like when a bear rubs his back on a tree? Like that.
      So always had to rely on having massive genitalia.
      😁

  12. You know someone’s a real cunt if when prevented from going out and acting like a spaz, they stay at home and join in a livestream cunt festival.

    That Glasto cunt will be thinking he will well cunts tickets to stay at home and live stream their cuntitude direct to each other via the pyramid stage.

  13. My disco moves are memorable – I was filmed getting on down to “Dancing Queen” at my Nieces wedding, showed them kids how it was done!
    But randomly the audience thought I had excessive headgear – I kept hearing “get off the dance floor you two hat”, or something like that..

  14. Horizontal dance parties ?
    Yes please.
    I’ll get me mac on, taxi for Dinas Powis, please !

  15. Millenials are being asked to sit at home and watch Netflix. They are not being sent to Normandy. Can not get your gluten free organic fate trade artisan bread? Fuck off. I went a supermarket just before 5 today and got everything I needed.
    Corbyn is a cunt.

  16. I joined one, totally naked but covered in jam. The fuckers banned me.

    So much for community spirit 🙁

  17. An Isis suicide bomber has killed himself and seventeen other family members after deciding to work from home….

  18. Just been down to Tesco myself and bought some of that toilet roll to see what all the fuss is about….

    • Grind it down and you’ll see it’s made of cocaine. Or gold. One of the two, anyway.

  20. Governments own web page HCID ( covid 19 ) down graded the virus, and admitted its low fatality rate. Kept this very quiet didn’t they ? Check it out.

  21. “The COVID-19 virus is not selective”. True. But….since we’ve all got time on our hands (or jizz in Fenton’s case) imagine if it was selective. Who would you nominate for a covid exterminate? Top of my list would be illegal gimmigrants and mud slimes. And my ex-wife. What say you?

      • Definitely added to the list, Dick. Just when you thought people couldn’t be any more cuntish, they somehow manage to lower the bar even further.

      • It makes me genuinely ashamed to be British,IY….”.Blitz spirit”?….”we’re all in this together”?….No. just a bunch of selfish Cunts.

      • I must admit Mr Fiddler that I was a bit unnerved when I read
        the slogan on the carrier bag in the top photo – “We work with farmers we know and trust”
        😀

      • I think it might have been produced by the Vegetarian Society of the UK! 😂

    • Everyone bar us on here.
      Clean sweep.
      Watching some docümentary about the Hollies, “air that I breathe” being one of my alltime favourite songs.
      But the lead singer Alan clarke looks like Harry H Corbett aka Harold steptoe, keeps making me laugh.
      Has self containment broken my fragile grip on sanity?

      • Saw the Hollies at the Golden Garter, Withenshaw in 75. Past their glory years but fuck me what a band.

    • I’m glad you left Catholicism out of this. We don’t want to go there!
      😀

      • Bertie, I imagine your Percy clicking his claws like a diva, “Sqwuarrrk! Don’t go there girlfriend! Mmmhmmm”
        “Check yourself before you wreck yourself.” Hehe 😀

      • Evening Spoons. I was listening to a phone in today. The caller had been shopping in a supermarket and was complaining, as a vegetarian, that meat eaters were stripping the shelves of all the vegetarian products including veggie mince.
        Poor fella was nearly in tears that the rabble were turning to vegetarianism and depriving him of his Burmese tofu. The buggers damn you when you don’t eat what they tell you and
        then damn you when you do!
        😂

      • Percy currently under arrest after an alleged violent assault on a gang of rival green parakeets – the traumatised arresting Officer stated he had “never heard such language and racism in 20 Years of service”!

    • The white indigenous PC politicians and libtard Establishment who have flooded this country with cheap migrant labour, ne’er do wells and those of an alien culture who think nothing of destroying our way of life.

      • Correct RTC. Apparently, Romanian pickpockets, devoid of victims, are now simply jacking up cars and cutting off the catalytic converters for the scrap. Diversity is our strength…

  22. I don’t want anyone to die of this virus. There might not be anyone left to nominate on this here fine ISAC website. I wouldn’t mind James Cordon getting it so bad it makes him reevaluate his life, though.

    Fuck me I have a list! However none of them are high enough profile to get on here, well apart from the “Traveler” population

  23. Meanwhile, because millenial cunts can’t amuse themselves with a book or a board game, internet bandwidth is being soaked up and hugely affecting home workers. Like the lads and lasses who I work with and are who are key workers.

    • Sgt Maj C, I suppose being on here affects the internet as well. It’s one of my few outlets.

      • I have fast fibre, not from BT – I detest those f*ckers but you are paying BT pretty much whoever you are with because they rent the lines out to every other service provider barring a few exceptions.
        Speed definitely down – must be all those online dance parties!
        Customer service is always lousy though, whoever you are with.

      • I doubt a few lines of text stop my colleagues doing their good work, Spoons. Please carry on cunting.

      • Bertie, those films of gentlemen wearing smoking jackets, and a monocle, whilst smoking a cigarette on a stick? “Hmmm yes. What what!”

        Oh hang on. Those are haughty films. 😀

  24. I heard the bloke next door to me coughing this morning so I’ve ordered one of these

    Hope they deliver it before I have to leave the house again.

    • From Sir Fiddlers own exclusive collection HS!
      And nice to see the supermarkets telling us we are all in this together – in which case stop jacking up the f*cking prices on basics you profiteering rodents.

      • The thing is the sly bastards know that some people will pay whatever they charge for essential items.

        I went to get some coffee and the robbing bastards had doubled the price. I’ll admit I tend to favour a certain brand of ground coffee, but refused on principle.

      • It’s going on in every supermarket where I live HS – I am not tight (actually I am – the traditional greeting around the World for every good Yorkshireman is “Ow much”?) but I know the prices of everything I buy, and they have all been marked up, some by over 20%.
        Wait for the annual profit forecasts from the supermarkets – and see how much the staff who put themselves in danger every day to serve us get.

    • Harold, my neighbour sounds like a revving motorbike when he coughs. “Hhhhrummm-mmm-mmmm-mmrrrrr”.

      • Keep your distance from him Spoons he sounds like he’s one of the afflicted.
        Get yourself one of these 17th century doctor’s costumes ordered like I have. You’ll be glad of it later.

        I’m also thinking of fortifying my estate a bit like ol’ Fiddler for when the looting starts.

      • They’re unfortunately out of my budget Spoons.
        I was thinking more along the lines of New Orleans style security measures – resin on the top of walls and putting shards of broken glass in it.

        When I was very young, I remember a few places like that in the town I grew up in.

        I remember it being banned as well because people might hurt themselves – wasn’t that the point?!

      • Blimey Harold!

        Get some Lego and sprinkle it on the ground.
        Treading on that barefoot in the dark, to me, is the worst pain ever.

  25. Stupid idea, Zero chance of fingering a bird. I’d rather 8 cans of Stella, wank of over Hardcore Porn and a nice deep sleep in the afternoon to while away those boring hours.

    Dancing wuz okay in 1990s on Excstaacy but real middle aged men don’t dance and specially not at fucking online cunting dance parties.

    Probs if some old tart gae me the eyes cummon on FB, I’d straight over to screw her back passage in real life. Doggie style is the good way, specially if they’re face past the best!

    CUNTS!

  26. It’s because celebrities get a different type of coronavirus to us Plebs,Cuntflap….most of them have been infected but luckily have no symptoms.They can self-diagnose and recover after a brave fight by posting updates to a worried public hourly on Facebook.

      • On a sad note fellow ISAC’ers – fragrant and lovely triller and clothes horse Sophie Ellis-Bexter has been found dead in the living room of a famous French former international footballer!
        Police believe “It’s murder on Zidanes floor”..

      • Fucking hell Vernon, that’s rubbish! One of those “it’s so crap but I’ll laugh anyway” Christmas cracker jokes. You got any more? 🤣🤣😂

      • I know a Man who is in the Guinness book of World records for the most concussions treated at A&E.
        He only lives a stones throw away..

      • Hahaha….least ways your audience on here has thick skin and or poor eyesight/hearing, so do your worst!

      • And what about the bloke who was sectioned for trying to shag a packet of Jacob’s?

        He was fucking crackers…

  28. Hiding in his mansion with a cellar full of young boys and cheap wine no doubt. Waiting for his Pheonix like moment, whilst prancing around like Buffalo Bill in the mirror.

  29. I saw the nomination this morning “on the telly” and was more horrified than usual.
    My eyes still hurt, and my ears are still ringing. I wish these fucking dullards and the posh cunts like Naga who pretend to love what they vomit would leave us alone and self immolate.

  30. The latest word from the health officials reckon that for every 1 death there are an estimated 1000 infections. I guess when you are looking at an essential 0.1% mortality rate, it’s not much of an equity increase for any cunt already in the pool.

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