Ed Balls (9)

A Portillo-like, BBC cunting for former MP, camp dancer, joke Chancellor (not quite so funny as McDonnell, but…) darling of the fairy Blairites, Edward Balls, who seems to be remodelling himself as a *personality*, with all the personality of a broken plastic umbrella. Mr Balls shows you how to make bricks without straw, eggless omlettes and how to be Charles Pooter in 2020.

He is an empty vessel that makes a deafening sound.

Just after Xmas it was announced that Jock Balls was becoming a gym instructor (I can imagine the pansy Blairites going weak at the knees as they salute “coach”.). Last weekend he was the cover subject of a gushing tribute in the Daily Express Saturday magazine. Now he has jumped on the BBC bandwagon, with his own BBC2 series:


Yet more paid-for-by-us jollies overseas (anything to keep away from Sugartits Cooper, I suppose), and – sure to bring a blush to the cheeks of our friends Russell-Moyle, Ben Bradshaw (ex BBC) and Gaylords Mandy and Adonis, – a gratuitous piece about “buttock massage” (ooooh, get the madam!)

If James Purnell becomes DG of the BBC, expect a lot more worn-out old politicos to leap aboard the bandwagon. Perhaps Emily and Jess could become “Loose Wimmin”?For the many, not the few.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

39 thoughts on “Ed Balls (9)

  1. What little I’ve seen of this cunt is he’s a personality vacuum the type who has a drink at office gatherings, gets loud, and is very fucking boring so that every other cunt gets as far away from him as possible, the woman he fancies fucks the temp in the photocopy room and Eddie stumbles home and cries himself to sleep.

  2. I’d very much like to enter into a bare knuckle fight with this fucking fat mummy’s boy.
    One can dream.
    The useless cunt.

    • I will second you UT! Fat Eddy is a whining little bully with a sense of entitlement the size of the World, useless Politician but a very “creative accountant”

  3. He is definitely flavour of the month at the BBCunts. I guess they are hoping for a political comeback, in which case the licence fee not only stays but is probably doubled.
    Is he still married to Pixie Belle or are they living in separate houses as per their parliamentary expense claims?

  4. Imagine this simple looking cunt banging that lezzer looking Yvette Cooper…what a vile picture.
    He likes the sort who let his Mrs punch him for not getting her bath the right temperature.
    What a wimpy cunt he is.
    I might start a ‘Be a real man’ school where wimps like this and the other soy boy types pay grand for two weeks tuition.
    I’d make a fortune in these times we live in.
    Go fuck yourselves.

    • Speaking as your business manager B&WC I think the “Be a Real Man School” is a winner – but we need DF on board as house master, with his trusty “riding crop of discipline”!
      “Like, where are the, like, vegan options”? – “Fuck off”

      • Can think of a few cunters who we’d need in onboard VF, hopefully we’d have some students left after the first week of beatings.

  5. The BBC obviously hasn’t taken Balls on for his political leanings, that wouldn’t be right. No, it must be because the stammering cunt is an outstanding broadcaster, whose impartiality will help the beeb combat the accusations of political bias.

    • Had some dealings with Fat Eddy and Ms Rodent face Years ago – a pair of purest 24 carat plated, in every conceivable way.

  6. Another machine politician cunt being richly rewarded for its utter incompetence.Under a Komodist government, there would be
    1. No political cunts in the media, unless being unsparingly interrogated on their activities by trained torturers, and
    2. Absolutely no media cunts in politics

  7. An insipid, vacuous — yet loud-mouthed — cunt of the highest order. Goes about like a cross between an unmade bed and a head injury. He seems to be, as some fellow cunters have rightly pointed out, quite ubiquitous at the moment, which induces seething episodes of piss boiling. It’s more than I can stand. Do one, special Ed!

  8. This cretin’s surname is just so apposite.

    The man talks fluent balls.

    He made a ham fisted ballsup of the Shoesmith case by dismissing her without due process. The taxpayer footed her compo bill.

    He has all the charisma of a hairy flaccid pair of balls.

    What a giant pair of balls.

    • Ed Balls has no balls.
      Unless bullying an intern.
      Ed Balls is a cunt, I do not engage in random violence (unless I am paid and have a Queens Commission and all the tools in the woooorld, allegedly!) – but this Man I would like to punch, nothing more, just a good gut shot (works very well!)
      That is all.

  9. Just one more nomination and this ballbag will be on The Wall.

    Question is, do we have sufficient space to accommodate the fat cunt?

  10. Cunty cunty, cunty, fucking bugger, bloaty bloaty fucking fat cunt… (sing to the tune of Venus in Furs by the Velvet Underground) it’s a cuntified Earworm.

    I can’t abide this fuckstick, though one has to acknowledge the cunt has stayed afloat.

  11. Our dog licks his balls constantly. For the life of me I can’t see what he get out of it because they taste fucking awful….

  12. Bit of a thread-jack but there is a move to make “17 Million Fuck-Offs” by Dominic Frisby the #1 record for when we actually leave.

    In mass-remoaning-hysteria the country’s 5th column element (aka ALL remoaners) are trying to combat this by trying to make Andrea Rieu’s (a Euro Cunt) version of Beethoven’s (another Euro Cunt) “Ode to Joy” (as played by the unelected EU cunts’ parliament) #1 instead.

    You can purchase “17 Million Fuck-Offs” on Amazon and Apple iTunes for 99p. 99p well spent to rub remoaning cunts noses in it along with that nasty 50p the Royal Mint has produced.

    If it gets to #1 then the AL-BEEB will have to play it (bleeped version o’course) – what’s not to like about that!

    If it doesn’t, well, you remoaning cunts STILL lost didn’t you! Hah!

    Everything else is just a load of Ed Balls!

    So take it away Dominic Frisby…


    • When i was young that was a way of saying some was a nutter,
      ‘Head the ball’.
      Anyone else?
      “Stop hanging round wi that Dave up the road, he’ll get you into trouble!
      Hes a head the ball”.
      Ed balls reminds me of that, snigger everytime i hear his name.

  13. This cunt used to gurn and gesture at Cameron’s lot in parliament. They were cunts but he was a bigger cunt.
    Utter, utter cunt.

  14. It’s hard to imagine a more pointless
    Vacuous excuse of a man ……
    The only time I found balls mildly entertaining was when the old pig fucker Cameron was giving him some tap at PMQs
    A thoroughly useless cunt ……

    • Very kind of Fat Eddy to use licence fee payers money to swan around Europe inventing waycism.
      I would move to Wuhan Province to avoid Yvette Cooper.
      I would move Planet to avoid Yvette Cooper.
      Part of the “Blair Witch Project” she is – never had a real job, darling of Teflon Tony, illegally picked from an all Wimminzs shortlist and gifted the safest Labour seat in England – specialises in house flipping and creative accounting.

  15. Must be terrible to be lumbered with a name like Balls. Oh ‘Balls’ is here. But to shorten your first name to Ed makes it worse. Edward Balls sounds marginally better. ‘Ed’ is shit sounding. ‘Ed’ Milliband. ‘Ed’ Sheeran. It’s trying to be cool like ‘Rick’ for Richard or ‘Mike’ for Michael. Mind you Ted doesn’t sound much better. Ted Balls no. Or Teddy. Teddy Balls no. I would insist on being called Edward if it was my name. After Edward the Confessor.

  16. Fucking wanker, trying to forge a sleb career for himself at a much lower level than Portillo, another cunt the electorate told to fuck off. Smarmy fucking arrogant prick. Fuck off cunt.

  17. If only Balls was the daftest thing about the slimy turd. Put him in the drawer marked “unflushable” as he will not go away.

  18. Why can’t former politicians just disappear into the ether, or back under the rock that they crawled out from?

    Why do we have to be subjected to the cunts ever after, be they suffocating their dance partner with their lardy frame a la Ann Widdecombe, on ‘Strictly Cunt Dancing’ or the awful spectacle of that mega cunt Edwina ‘bit on the side’ Currie. bitch-fighting with Gordon Ramsey on ‘Hell’s Kitchen’.

    Why the fuck can’t they just fuck off into obscurity? None of them are hard up, for fuck’s sake. It just shows that they are eternally driven by their own need to remain in the public eye and sheer narcissism.


  19. Fucking gym instructor!!!!!. Not exactly the vision of fitness you would expect to be greeted with as your gym instructor. The fat cunt would need to lose about 10 stone.

  20. Ted Bollocks. Fuck right off you total and utter cunt and take Mrs Bollocks with you. Cunt.

Comments are closed.