I just turned the telly on to watch Hobson’s Choice when the announcer announced that “the following film is classified as P.G”. Who the fuck could find anything offensive in ” Hobson’s Choice? I’ve watched it several times and haven’t heard a single swear word or seen as much as a flash of tit or bush. I have also not noticed any violence,stabbing,mugging,drug-selling or benefit fraud…I expect this is because there are no Dark Keys in it. I have also not witnessed any Depravity or Debauchery…I expect this is because the film was made before The Gayness was invented.
But back to subject…I can’t imagine that anyone who is watching some old black and white film from 1954 is likely to have need of Parental Guidance…I’d be amazed if they even had a Parent still drawing breath never mind issuing guidance on what to watch.
Nominated by Dick de Pfeffel Foxchaser-Fiddler
There should be an additional warning at cinemas before a film starts, stating that any annoying loud mouth cunt using his/her phone during the performance will be fucking electrocuted with 240volts up the arsehole!
7
Something like this, Techno? 😀
https://m.9gag.com/gag/abrgr5v
5
There should be a warning before films telling the viewer at what point someone is going to vomit. I watch films regularly and I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but I can hardly remember the last time I saw one where someone doesn’t throw up. It’s as though some film director included a puking scene and all the rest thought ‘Oh that’s a good idea, I’ll do it too’. It’s become a fucking cliché in modern cinema. I’m sick of seeing people being sick. I’d rather watch someone having a shit, just for a change.
5
Talking Pictures TV were ordered to put up warning announcements by OFCOM.
The sort of people who watch this excellent channel (I include myself amongst that number), are not likely to be upset or offended by a piece of dodgy dialogue from fifty years ago. We are made of tougher stuff.
At this point though, I would like to nominate Freeview for not providing a decent signal so that I can get channel 81.
5
“Warning; the following tired hackneyed dross will insult your intelligence, steal your soul, and cause physical damage to your hearing…regardless of your fucking age”
2
Warning: the following programme may contain distressing content – crap acting, shitty dialogue, and ludicrous plot.
But apart from that, it’s a pile of old toss. BBC News.
2
Great cunting, but I think we should have the following warning.
“This program contains scenes which follow the progressive agenda, which some normal people may find offensive and downright infuriating. All the straight white males will be depicted as either evil, stupid or both. They may be racists, sexists, murderers, rapists or a combination of all of these. The white males afflicted with ‘the gayness’ will, however be depicted as strong, kind and helpful people.
The wimminz of all races will be depicted as strong, despite the sexism directed at them by the white males. The white ones will have efnik male partners. These wimminz will beat up the white male baddies with ease on a regular basis.
This production may also revise history. For example, Sir Winston Churchill may be played by a black lesbian in a wheelchair with a thick Jamaican accent.”
To be fair I think every new ‘drama’ made by the beeb doesn’t really need such a warning, as all of their shows are like this now anyway.
2