New homes

I should like to cunt both new home builders and the utter fuckwits who buy their shitty products.

Due to importing enormous amounts of third-world dross and assorted Eurotrash, Britain is, supposedly, in a ‘housing crisis’. Funny that; when I’m out walking my dog, I see a great many houses that are clearly unnoccupied but the short-sighted governments (of either stripe) have stipulated that hundreds of thousands of these ghastly hovels have been to be thrown up in quadruple-quick time.
Most cunters here have, no doubt, been in one of these poor-constructed abortions. Yet who here would be dim enough to buy a brand new one?
You’ve more rights as a consumer buying a tin of tuna.
We all know the problems with these wank-boxes; twenty houses squeezed onto square footage fit only for six, thin walls, tiny rooms, gaps around windows, inadequate drainage; this list is practically endless.
Everyone with a half a brain knows this and yet these spastics still drop £400k on one of these gerbil cages and moan like fuck when they get ripped off.
Looking on Rightmove, a search of any given area will yield plenty of half-decent houses within a comparable price bracket, so why do these people do it?
Are they the sort of mongs who like to be seen to have an 18-plate lower-end Mercedes on the drive that they don’t own (£5k down and £400 a month with no ownership option) just to impress their wanker neighbours? I rather suspect so.

Nominated by Thomas the Cunt Engine

36 thoughts on “New homes

  1. Saw a story in the papers recently about some cunts who bought a brand new house with a man hole cover in the front garden. When they moved in they found they were on top of a sewer and the whole place stank of shit. Needless to say everybody was denying responsibility and it was all some other cunts fault. I should have felt sorry for them but they looked like a pair of snobby cunts so fuck ‘em.

    • I tried not to laugh, they do look like a family of knobs. On the other hand the sheer greed and incompetence that allows builders and those involved to build a house on a nexus of human shit pipes. No fucks given about these overpriced claustrophobic cracker boxes.

  2. There is no houses shortage problem in the UK.

    Houses simply disappeared overnight thus causing the crisis we have now.

    To intimate otherwise is waycist.


    Speaking of SJW and virtue-signalling madness this video gives a very sobering view on how UK Police Officers genuinely feel about all of this bullshit.

    Deffo worth a watch if you have time.

    • It simply reaffirms my view that in 20 years muslim rapist gangs will be state-sponsored, rather than just ‘misunderstood for cultural reasons’ and anybody with a non-sjw view will be in jail while murderers, rapists, violent offenders etc will be walking free to engage in their pursuits at will.

  3. Arrrrrrrggh my Eyes if it wasn’t bad enough waking up With a banging head because of fucking England I’ve turned the TV to be granted with that mighty cumbucket cunt Owen Jones he was arguing with some American lady over Trumps UK visit from the top of the BBC in London, shame some peaceful friend hadn’t popped up to see him and give him a free flying lesson. What an annoying cunt he is. Spent five minutes shouting at the TV.

    • Whatever happened to British Standards and the kitemark and all that? The standard of building in this country is shit, the same that everything else has become. Including the football team who won it in the first half and managed to throw it away in the second. I don’t expect things to improve when they introduce Sharia Law in a few years. Hopefully I’ll be dead by then.

  4. You must have been spying round near me……?
    Plenty of crap new plate cars driven by empty headed fuckwits who think they have arrived
    As for the houses down the bottom of the hill throwing them up on natural flood plane…. And boy does it flood
    Total cunts …. Builders and buyers
    Can’t wait to see the cunts start sinking….
    I don’t know about new houses be fitted with charging points…… These cunts will need lifeboats

  5. Currently under construction in the centre of Huntingdon, Terraced apartments cobbled together around a whitewood timber frame, no brick fire walls, cheap and nasty fibreboard and wooden roofs. The design is of a “Dutch” style roof, and “Scandanavian ” appearance.

    Obviously these have been built for our ever burgeoning Euro partners as they continue to occupy our Nation, or those Remainers who love to embrace all things continental.

    The place looks a deathtrap, and for those on the upper floors, in a fire I don’t give much for their chances. Building safety post Grenfell ?????

    Only a complete fucking retard would buy one of these !

    • Sadly, there are plenty of them available, but even they probably wouldn’t be interested if the rental market wasn’t so fucking expensive, denying people the opportunity to save for something decent. It’s only in the UK that property ownership is such a big deal but in Europe, for example, rental costs less than half what it does here, and that’s a maximum. Bearing in mind that in places like Germany, average wages are higher then you can see that people in the UK are stuffed every which way. It doesn’t help that most utilities and transport companies are foreign owned so they also subsidise their native customers at our expense.

  6. Glad to hear of a load of shite being put up there – I have just bought a site for 3 houses outside Huntingdon which will be as nice as building regs permit (a whole other issue!) as I am planning to live in one of them.

    • Pleased to hear of that! Nice place Huntingdon but boy! The new builds. Checked out some of the new ones at Alconbury. Pricey! Thin walled to say the least.

    • Nice work Proper Cunt, that idea was something i was thinking about around a decade ago, fortunately i didn’t as everything imploded shortly afterwards.

      how about sell all of them and buy somewhere with no neighbours?

      • Did look at the census data – not a single person of the peaceful persuasion. In fact, 100% white British – didn’t think that existed anymore….

  7. New builds – shittly little airtight boxes with claustrophobic corridors, walls and ceilings adorned with all manner of cheap plasticky alarms, entry phones and sensors; the shittest of the shite quality flat-twin-and-Earth wiring, and plumbing fixtures designed for restricted trickle flows from showers and taps.

    All crafted at the hands of whistling Polish flatheads and their cost-cutting charlatan scumcunt contractor bosses.

    No matter how fucking desperate I was if I was facing the prospect of getting on the ladder again, with what I know about the building industry I would never, ever take a shitty new build in a million years.

  8. Oh and don’t forget that nice little leasehold scam racket developers have allowed to flourish in new build blocks and similar. Utter fucking cunts. Anyone and everyone who works for cunts like Bellway Homes or Wilmott-Dixon should be burned at the fucking stake.

    • Well said ECB! That fucking practice ( leasehold ) deserves a cunting in its own fucking right! What kind of Government would allow its people to be milked like that by a bunch of greedy bastards?
      Cunts obviously!

  9. I love how some of these housing developments are described as “luxury living”, “much sought after and secluded”, “exclusive living”, “a new experience” etc etc. When in actual fact they’re just the same old Barrett House boxes we see going up all over the country: small rooms, no internal storage; no garden, poxy little drive-way, no character… but comes with a “from ONLY £250,000….” price tag.

    And more often than not the BTL crowd move in, do nothing to the house other than to slap on an extra couple of hundred quid on the already extortionate rent.

    • And where do they get these fucking names for their estates ? Near us….”Roman Edge ” complete with a Centurion Way and all that shite. The Romans fucked off from Godmanchester nearly 2000 years ago ffs!

      • It won’t be too long before you start seeing “Ayatollah Drive”, “Singh Street”, “Mujahideen Avenue” and “Transylvania Lane”

    • They are exclusive living. By that they exclude anyone with an IQ in excess of 50 as they would not that that fucking stoopid to buy such a place.

  10. You are right about the air tightness – Part L Building Regs (global warming innit). If you don’t open the windows (which most idiots don’t) and take steps to minimise humidity (again, most don’t) then, come November, you are properly fucked.

  11. Horrid rabbit hutch overpriced shit boxes with low ceilings, narrow plastic front doors, laminated flooring, no front gardens, cushions that say LOVE on them and the show homes have scaled down furniture to make the rooms look bigger.

    Those stupid cunts that buy homes built on flood plains and who suffer flood damage will be on their own and will be left with a devalued and unsellable house with no recourse against anyone despite planning permission being granted by the local council and the house being relatively new and built to specification.

    • I don’t think local councils give two shits when it comes to flood plains, drainage, traffic etc during the planning permission process for new builds.

      All they’re more concerned with is the extra council tax revenue – an extra 500 new homes could generate around a million for them to waste on some PC bollocks or another “fact finding” trip to the Seychelles or Jamaica.


  12. I love the way the show houses have miniature furniture to make them seem roomy.
    There is a proposed development south of Scunthorpe in the Lincolnshire countryside called ‘the Lakes’. Appropriate as it is on the river Trent flood plain below high tide level in an area that was hit by the Humber tidal surge a few years ago. Perhaps ‘the Swamps’ would be a better title.

  13. All the above, to which I cannot add informed comment as I can’t afford a dog kennel, and rent. Informed people have confirmed the lousy building quality to me – in one case a development was predicted to last 20 years max after building. Strictly uninformed, then –
    These clusters of little brick boxes – with some bigger brick boxes for those with high credit ratings – are built as re-entrant cul-de-sac mazes which require yet another junction with an already busy road to allow the (invariably) commuting ant-people to get to their non-jobs in management. They have no shop, pub or any other useful amenity. In no sense are they, nor will they ever become, communities, despite often being situated out in the sticks and on their own. Where built on cheap land skirting an existing town or village, they generally become ghettoes, with no interaction between the immigrants (here, largely from Essex) and the locals. And they turn over a few years into ribbon developments, as the farmer next door gives up and flogs his fields to the developer.

    I fucking hate these soulless, fake-period, view-destroying, land-sterilising antheaps with a passion. And the kind of sucker who buys into them is as Thomas remarks, someone who doesn’t own his faux-flash BMW either. Nor do they even attempt to solve the housing problem, which is simply that it costs too fucking much and there is insufficient rented capacity due to uncontrolled immigration. Thanks for an excellent and cogent cunting, Thomas.

  14. Trump was awesome just now (and at the NATO summit).

    I’d like to smash Owen Jones in the babyface.

  15. I see all the baby snowflake cunt Trump haters are out… I can only hope a few get their heads cracked by the old bill in the next few days… “But,but he’s a bad man!” Fuck off, you absolute fucking flutes…. Viva Big Don!

    The US embassy has also taken the unusual step of issuing a warning to American citizens in the UK to “keep a low profile” during the visit of President Donald Trump….

    There are fears that demonstrations over Trump’s three-day visit to the UK, where he will meet with British Prime Minister ‘Appeaser’ Theresa May and HM Queen Elizabeth II, could turn violent…. The largest demonstration is expected in central London on Friday where a giant “Trump baby” balloon will fly close to Parliament after being given the go-ahead by Mayor of Londonistan, Suckmuzzydick Khan…. The idea of Americans having to hide themselves in London is both crazy and disgraceful…. This is supposed to be Great Britain: open to all kinds of ideas and opinions – even ones with which many disagree….. The so-called ‘liberal left’ in Suckdick’s London really are the lowest of the low and they are no better than Hitler’s followers were in 1930s Berlin… Disgusting fascist cunts….

    • Imagine if Hilary Clitface won the presidency and she had the 3 day trip over to the UK; and there was an inflatable Hilary Chimp balloon high in the sky and protesters left, right and centre; the wank-stains on the snowflake Left would be pissing themselves with rage on Twatter, saying that such demos and balloons are an affront to true democracy, and typical far right fascists/racists/bigots/brexiters are all to blame.

      But because the shoe is on the other foot the Trump protests are fully justified!


      • A balloon depicting Slick Willy getting sucked off would be a good welcome for the clitworm.

        Brilliant cuntings, and here’s hoping Moaning Owen gets trampled to death in the rush to buy edgy, on-message indy lattes from some snowflake barista cunt operating a bicycle-powered coffee shop…

  16. I’m now the proud owner of a couple of thousand rotten red bricks and some woodworm timber on account of finishing my terraced house mortgage. A real street with normal people as opposed to the Pseudo posh development up the way. All out there washing their poverty spec German cars on the weekend when they’re not backskuttling the neighbours wives at Fondue Parties and Asda curry nights. Fucking cunts! A Fucking Stepford Wives lookalike session…Cuntbubbles.

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