Amazon deserves a cunting… Email received today, please would you spare a few moments to help us improve our service ?

Very cleverly, click on the three buttons – yes it arrived on time, yes it met my expectations, yes they were courteous and when I contacted them. Was there a button to click for “Efficient?” Nah, like fuck. So I clicked send… “your comment is too brief, you have to fill in the box below”…

“My dear Fuckwits, have already replied by pressing above buttons. Fuck off…Fuck Off…Fuck OFF”

Nominated by: HBelinda Hubbard

I used to be a big Amazon fan. Would buy my stuff on there by default pretty much. However, things changed when they announced they were going to build some kind of warehouse facility in my state. Allow me to explain.

In Yankland, each state collects sales tax which is added to the price of stuff you buy. It’s the Yank equivalent of VAT. However, if the store you buy from is an online store and there’s no physical presence in the state, there is no sales tax! Instant price advantage. Then Amazon announced they’re to build a facility in my state and by just announcing it, state law says Amazon have to add sales tax to everything bought by people from my state.

So, Amazon makes a business decision for the betterment of their company without consulting me in any way and by so doing, everything I buy from them instantly goes up by 8%. Lovely. I complained bitterly, but Amazon claim they’re still able to sell at discounted prices due to volume deals with suppliers. Bullshit. I priced out several items from another online store and the identical items from Amazon were more expensive. Not by much, but it was more expensive.

So Amazon can go fuck themselves unless they re-introduce an 8% discount on my orders. Which they won’t because they’re cunts.

Nominated by: Immitation Yank

8 thoughts on “Amazon

  1. Amazon are cunts that’s for sure, more for their slavery employment than their service though. Imitation yank, your problem is caused by government and not Amazon. Government set taxes and milks us all dry. It never ceases to amaze me that citizens world wide don’t question taxation more. In particular income tax which he have no choice or control over at all.

    • Sixdog: I realise Amazon didn’t choose by themselves to impose sales tax. They HAD to as a result of creating a physical presence in my state. My point is, they chose to have that physical presence which presumably helps their business, but in doing so caused the prices I pay to go up. That’s what makes them a cunt.

      While on the subject of Amazon being cunts, I’m sick to death of their Prime bollocks too. It was $49, then $79 and now it’s $99. Their relentless message of what great value it is simply doesn’t hold water. Let’s look at what you get with a Prime Membership (taken from their website):

      “Free” 2 day shipping:
      Bullshit. It’s consistently 3 or more days because both UPS and FedEx don’t give a fuck about Amazon’s delivery schedule. If I order something from Amazon on Monday morning, it should be at my house by Wednesday. That’s 2 day shipping. However, that was never the case. It was Thursday most of the time and occasionally Friday. For years I complained to Amazon about this and consistently got the same response, “Yeah, really sorry here’s a $5 credit now fuck off and leave us alone”.

      Prime Video: No thanks. I have Netflix and that’s only $8 a month.

      Prime Music: No thanks. There are countless FREE streaming music services like Pandora. Plus when I’m at home I listen to MY music. When I’m travelling I listen to the music stored in my ‘phone.

      Prime Photos: The “cloud” is just IT marketing bullshit. Plus I backup my own stuff using my own local NAS. You know, because I’m not a fuckwit.

      Prime Early Access: “30-minute early access to Lightning Deals on Amazon”. We’re all busy and don’t have time for this shit. Unless you’re sitting in front of a computer all day, every day with nothing else to do, just waiting for a ‘lightening deal’ to appear, which may or may not be of interest, this so called perk is worthless.

      Kindle Books: No thank you. I prefer an actual book because I’m not a dick.

      So the only ‘perk’ of Amazon Prime for me would be the 2 day shipping option. But it’s never 2 days, so I was paying for a service I was consistently not getting. Did Amazon do anything about it apart from pat me on the head and give me $5? Hell no. That’s why I cancelled, that’s why they’re cunts and that’s why I now go out of my way to not buy from Amazon.

      • I am sensing a dislike of Amazon 🙂

        Amazon are of course cunts, they are corporate economic rapists, if they move to a different location they probably get a local tax incentive coupled with low wages in the area and better shipping links.

        Corporate cunts operate because government cunts let them. This is going to happen more and more as automation and overseas outsourcing of jobs makes employment opportunities rare.

        I am waiting for someone in government to tell us how they are going to pay for 60 – 70% unemployment in the future.

        Quick cram some more immigrants in.

      • I hear ya, Sixdog. You make some great points.

        Working in IT as I do, it makes me puke how the headless chicken mentality of management is rushing to everything “cloud”. Cloud is ice cold bullshit. Ice cold because it’s not new, not even close. Bullshit because companies are duped into believing just because another way of doing something is cheaper and requires less capital expenditure, then it must be better. What they seemingly fail to realise is that by moving the company’s most valuable asset – it’s data – into the cloud, they are in fact giving up security and control of that data. I fail to see how that’s a good thing. Management see it differently of course because they don’t need to spend the company’s money on server hardware and can get rid of their own system admins, network admins, database admins, storage admins, etc. Where do these people go when their jobs have fucked off to the cloud?

        Add to that the generous handouts given to the unskilled, unwashed and unemployable immigrant scum arriving by the truck load every fucking minute, it’s difficult to see how the UK can sustain itself. These bastard immigrants who so badly want to be in the UK are in fact destroying and bankrupting the place they’ve moved to. And the politicians are just letting it happen because it’s the ‘right’ and ‘humanitarian’ thing to do. Really? When was the last time Syria stepped in to help the UK out over some national crisis? Let’s try never, so why do they qualify for free favours now?

      • Waiting for the cunts to start their drone delivery service. Got me 12 bore sporting guns oiled and ready.

      • Amazon is shit, closed my account years ago, it is just a stepping stone to one mega corporation that sells everything to the world.
        They even plan on doing food now.
        Next they will be selling you water and oxygen.
        Fuck them, they are worse than the supermarkets, they have killed local shops and any competition, that’s why they keep putting the price of Prime up, cause people have no other real options.

  2. Amazon are total cunts, they took £79 out of my card account without my consent for the so called Amazon Prime service, I only found out when they kept reminding me that I was not using the service. Over the past two years I have started to reduce the transactions on Amazon because of their tax avoidance schemes and rather immoral approach to labor. I even prefer to shop locally, I may pay a small amount more but it keeps local people in work and local businesses active. Bezious has great ambitions but puts little into the communities so people should use Amazon less and think about the future, not the gargantuan size of Bezious’s wallet, more capacious than an elephants scrotum. Amazon, you are total fucking cunts!

    • Yeah, they’re good at sneaking the Prime thing in. They don’t make it obvious you’re signing up for it. They caught me on the month’s free trial shite, but I noticed it and cancelled immediately. You gotta watch the buggers…

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