Celebrity Fragrances


Did you get some for Christmas?

After all, ‘Is the season to senselessly spend loads of cash on cunts you can’t stand, so all these lemming-like mongs go out and buy celebrity fragrances….

Basically cheap and nasty bog water perfume that thick cunts pay well over the odds for, because it has some greedy want more money celebrity cunt’s name and ugly mug on it… They all do it: Beckham (both of the cunts!), Ladyboy Ga Ga, Katy Perry, Britney Spears (I thought she was dead!), Beyonce and probably that Kardashian slag too…

Even that fat obnoxious warthog, Jade Goody had a perfume (Christ knows what it smelled like!)….

Anyone who buys a celebrity perfume is a cunt, and any bloke who ever uses Beckham or One Direction aftershave is a poofter….

Nominated: Norman

17 thoughts on “Celebrity Fragrances

  1. Ashamed to say I did once buy the Beckham stuff – although my motivation was frugality. It was the cheapo £10 stuff in Sainsbury so I should have known better, I mean descent aftershave isn’t usually available from the same shelf as Palmolive shaving foam.

    The shit smelt like bottom-shelf vodka.

    I’m no poofter though Norman – I exfoliate with Swarfega.

  2. Got some nice Bodyshop musk off the girlfriend although she bought me dad some Beckham stuff,I was looking for a Jimmy Savile box set in the sales where you fully insert the roll on deodrant bottle up the nearest teenagers anus but You can only buy them at the BBC online shop

  3. is there anything more irritating than those fuckin perfume ads?. you can just imagine the cretins in the ad. agency sitting around;’ how we gonna run this? ‘how about we create a fuckin fantasy world full of impossibly beautiful people living impossibly unrealistic lives? ‘ ‘yeh good idea Quentin, sid and doris bonkers are that fuckin stupid that they really will think if they buy this over priced over hyped shit, some of that ‘lifestyle’ will rub off on them, lets do it.’

  4. I wouldn’t use that stuff even if I shit myself on a crowded train and diarrhoea was dripping into my socks.

  5. I am sad to say I have just seen an advert for a film called ‘The Danish Girl’ please tell me no one is going to actually watch it….PLEASE!

    • Nope, not I.

      Only the kind of ‘people’ who like to molest little kids and have gerbils rammed up the arses while wearing a tutu are going to see it.

      So basically only the LBTG and particularly Q communities.

  6. Can you imagine these sticks of shit in white aprons mixing their own favourite perfumes in the labortory of fuck
    And never forget ADOPT A WOG because it deserves it !

  7. I remember that deoderant Jean Paul Gaulltier brought out back in the 80s called awesome. You could always guarantee your armpits to smell awesome with or without the spray

  8. I don’t wear perfume anyway. But even if I did I would never buy a ‘celebrity’ perfume. They should stick to what they are (grossly over) paid to do and stop being greedy by creating sideline projects.

  9. Sleb fragrances are one of the biggest marketing cons out there. Nearly all of them smell like stale cat piss in a rusty frying pan. I’d rather casserole my own shit than buy into all that rubbish. Paying way over the odds for lightly scented water. The braindead dribbling catalogue-whores and mongs out there buy into it with no problem because they can’t be fucked to have their own thoughts on it. What a fucking rotter.

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