“And how do you intend to support yourself in the future Mr Lineker?” asks the beak.
“Might get a job on the telly like me pater Your Honour”.
“And how will you pay the fine Mr Lineker”
“Mumsy will settle everything”
Understand a fellow sponging orf the ladies, been doing it all me life, but one has an estate to support. Try tapping the pater you little cunt.
And the useless wanking degenerate cannot even hold a few pints orf piss poor beer.
Pleasure to have little Harrypoos back in me old regiment. Sarn’t Majah would have had him blowing orf all the NCOs for reveille. That pouty mouth made for it. Spot orf jankers. Soon set the lad straight.
Now that mouth on him has got me thinking. His ancient old man has made a tidy little earner by tonguing, sucking and swallowing those fucking crisps. He must have practised that mouth action somewhere….
Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke
Gary Lineker was a goalhanging cunt, and not in the same class as Bobby Charlton, Geoff Hurst and Jimmy Greaves…
I remember Saint Gary’s sanctimonious bullshit when Eric Cantona decked that gobshite in 95… I can imagine the scenario if it had been Lineker at Selhurst that night:
Simmons: ‘Fuck off back to England, and fuck your mother, you English bastard!”
Lineker: ‘Steady on, old fruit… There’s no need for that…”
Both Linekers (father and son) are cunts….
Nominated by: Norman Whiteside
That Danielle Bux slag is the step mother of the chavs – so they can shag her without it being incest – and I bet they do when Gary is round at Tony Blair’s eat out his bum hole (with the pope and Ban Ki-moon bottling each other on the same bed).
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I remember watching MOTD in 95: and the great Pele was one of the guests on the show…. Des Lynham asked Pele if there were any players in the Premier League who stood out for him… Pele said “Cantona”. The Brazil legend then added “He is a fine player and he is a man. Man enough to face up to things and stand up for himself. The fuss made in this country (over Eric’s twatting of Simmons and his ban) has been ridiculous… The man is not a killer. Yet you treat him like he is…”
Cue the pompous and self righteous cunt, Lineker: squirming like a worm in bleach after a bad curry… As I watched, I smiled and thought: “Argue with Pele, you cunt!”
Lineker was very quick to condemn Cantona, yet he was also always quick to remind people what a ‘character’ and ‘loveable one-off’ his wifebeating and mentally disturbed tosspot mate Gazza was… What a cuntwipe…
Lineker is also a hypocritical twat… He recently slammed Sepp Blatter and FIFA over the Qatar corruption controversy… OK, Blatter and FIFA are cunts. But while the Qatar bid was being bigged up Lineker was working for (and getting very well paid by) Al Jazeera TV…. Gary Lineker is, quite simply, a total cunt…
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Was it really 19 years ago that Eric Cantona channelled Hong Kong Phooey? I can remember that little shit Simmons trying to portray himself as a victim, and then his violent criminal record coming out. Wonder if the little cunt has managed to go straight yet? Nah, he’s probably praying he doesn’t drop the soap right now.
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Danielle Bux? I bet she fucking does…
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The BBC are (again) cunts…. Last night there was a special on Rod Stewart: they showed some classic Faces footage (They weren’t as good as Marrtott’s Small Faces, but they were still a bloody fine band…), and those BBC4 wankers edited the performances to bits (cutting out the legendary ‘football’ bit from the TOTP performance of ‘Maggie May’). Not to mention taking out about ten seconds of ‘Stay With Me’ (What is the fucking point of doing that?!). Not to mention putting on those ridiculous TOTP2 style captions full of trivia five seconds after every song starts… I don’t know: if they aren’t messing with kids, they’re messing with whatever half decent stuff they haven’t wiped, the twats…
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Isn’t it about time someone cunted Arthur Askey, again. I cunted him some time ago but he deserves to be cunted once more.
flaxensaxon.blogspot.com
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FFS get over it. He’s been dead since 1982!
Mind you, I did like your piece about him over on your blog
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He did have the ability to make people laugh.
He was doing that God-awful “Bee Song” at some flea pit and fell off stage 25ft into the empty orchestra pit. He was groaning and crying “help” while having a heart attack, and audience laughed like bastards.
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