Monthly Archives: December 2013

The Elders

Posted on by

elders-icon-22

Came across this shower of self righteous smug hateful cunts during the never ending Mandela bore-a-thon on TV.

Have you ever read such fucking pretentious shite in your life. Worst of the lot of them though is the toe curlingly annoying up her own arse cunt, Mary Robinson.

Nominated by: DanB

FFS! You have to be joking! Just who are these self righteous up their own arse cunts anyway?

Surprise surprise! Founder Nelson fucking Mandela. Honorary member Desmond fucking Tutu. Chairman Kofi Annan.

Who else for the cuntroll? Martti Ahtisaari former president of Finland and winner of the nobel Peace Prize for bullshit, Ela Bhatt founder of the Self-Employed Women’s Association in India, Lakhdar Brahimi a former Algerian freedom fighter (another fucking peacemaker with a gun?), Gro Harlem Brundtland the first woman Prime Minister of Norway, Fernando H Cardoso the former President of Brazil (famous for reducing poverty apparently. Have you been to Brazil lately?), Jimmy the peanut king Carter, Hina Jilani a human rights lawyer (FFS! No!), Graça Machel another fucking human rights ‘champion’, Mary Robinson a ‘forceful advocate for womens participation in human dignity’ (whatever the fuck that means!), and last but not least Ernesto Zedillo a former President of Mexico ‘who led profound democratic and social reforms; economist and advocate of multilateralism, inclusive globalisation, nuclear non-proliferation and drug policy reform.’

Well spotted DanB. A right pretentious bunch of self appointed, self opinionated and self important cunts if ever there was one. I expect Blair will be joining now there’s a vacancy. Probably end up running it!

Nominated by: Dioclese

Cuntfest 2013

Posted on by

FNB Stadium in Soweto

The Great Nelson Mandela Memorial Tribute in the FNB Stadium Soweto. Bit of a mouthful, so let’s just call it “Cuntfest 2013” to keep things simple.

According to some quality reporting in the Torygraph, 91 heads of state including Cameron (the Queen is our head of state you cunts!), Miliband and Clegg (duh!?), Hollande, Merkel, Obama, Mugabe, Tony Abbot, Jose Barrossa (the EU is not a fucking state!),King Willem Alexander of the Netherlands, Crown Prince Felipe and Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy of Spain, Dilma Rousseff, Mahmoud Abbas, Pranab Mukherjee.

10 former heads of state including Gordon Brown (who still isn’t the Queen, you twats), Tony Blair, John Major, the entire Clinton family, George W Bush, Jimmy the peanut king Carter.

And let’s not forget the really important people like Bono (obviously), Annie Lennox, Peter Gabriel, Bill Gates, half the Spice Girls (the other half had more sense), Oprah Winfrey, Naomi Campbell.

Yes, absolutely, together with many, many others this is indeed a positive cornucopia of cuntishness, a Cuntfest to end all Cuntfests!! A veritable cuntopia!

And how apt they are holding it in a football stadium – perhaps as a rehearsal for “Cuntfest 2014” which I gather is taking place in Brazil?

Nominated by: Dioclese

Monty Python

Posted on by

pythons

Five Dead Cunts Walking and one old slapper.

Oxbridge mafia up their own arses unfunny type cunts. Well not entirely true – the camp doctor cunt snuffing it with aids amused one rather. Now out on a tired old tossers last tour at a mill a pop the geriatric cunts. Soon as the wankers got their publicity it emerged that they were doing a world tour as well. Screwing the fans to the last. Just so that metal hipped cunt Cleese can afford to marry another ambulance chasing gold digger.

All be dead soon hopefully. Well you’ve got to look on the bright side of life.

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke

And the old slapper is not quite what she was, is she…
d8e5e1ba-95eb-42d3-a954-03c98a226853HiRes
…bet she’s glad she didn’t go for those cheap French jobbies now, eh? Ed.

James Blunt [3]

Posted on by

james-blunt-corbis-630-80

Apparently, James Blunt was a soldier in the Balkan conflict. I will never ever forgive the Serbians for not taking out the tone deaf, simpering, shit singing turd of a man. Hang your heads in shame Serbia you could have prevented that pop based monstrosity and you didn’t.

Nominated by : London cunt

Back in the 60’s we had Leonard Cohen and his best selling album “Music to Slit Your Throat By”. Fuck me was that cunt depressing! Now we’ve got James Blunt. Mind you, you have to take your hat off to a bloke who can write a song about suicide and turn it into the most popular song ever for weddings!

But then marriage is an institution – and who the fuck want’s to live in an institution?

James Blunt – a Leonard Cohen for the 21st century. FFS!

Nominated by: ChasCMusic

Dead Pool [6]

Posted on by

dead pool 6

* * * * WE HAVE A WINNER! * * * *
Congratulations to Ollie Burton’s Grandad who correctly guessed the next cunt to kick the cunting bucket … therefore becoming a dead cunt.

Ollie correctly predicted “Well I reckon that the ex terrorist and Lime quarry Worker Nelson Mandela will be the next cunt to cop his fucking wack, the fucker has been living on borrowed time for a while now; here’s hoping for 2 in a row!”

Well done! OK – it took a while this time round and you now have your two in row – so it’s a play off between you and Dioclese for the first hat trick.

Ollie wins a guest post on the subject of his choice. Just send it to dioclese@virginmedia.com and we’ll tart it up and post it.

The slate has been wiped clean and everyone gets to pick a new ‘dead cunt walking’ as we move on to The Dead Pool 6.
One rule change and in case you’re new to the world of predicting bucket kicking cunts, here’s a refresher:

1. Nominate who you think is next on the way out.
You can have a maximum of three cunts each. Leave names in the Comments.

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the last Dead Pool.

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. The winner gets a dedicated Dead Pool Champion post and kudos of cuntishness aplenty. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

Good luck and please address all T-shirt orders to Flaxen Saxon…