Benedict Cumberbatch

Bendydick Bandersnatch, or whatever the luvvie cunt’s name is, is even more of a cunt than we thought.

According to today’s Sunday Times (14/2/2021, paywall so fuck the link) he has a friend who spent 14 years in Guantanamo. I presume a ‘pen friend’ like the death row correspondents. But who knows?

He is having a hissy fit because Priti has told his friend to fuck off. No visa for you pal. So he cant use his ‘friend’ to publicise some woke shit about his travails as a complete innocent in Guantanamo. At the hands of the evil Yanks.

His ‘friend’ Mohamedou Ould Slahi comes from that bastion of desert freedom, Mauritania. You know, where slavery still flourishes. He is a member of Al-Quaeda and an associate of numerous muslim loonies.
Surely we should welcome him with open arms? An innocent Afghan tourist picked on by the evil Yanks. After all, he is a ‘friend’ of Bendydick’s and probably wouldnt kill many people while he was publicising his struggle.
Perhaps they should call the film Mein Kampf.

Nominated by: Cunstable Cuntbubble 

(Couldn’t find a direct link, but here’s a link to a new film both Cumbercunt and Slahi appear in covering the same ground – DA https://easyreadernews.com/the-mauritanian-the-survivor-movie/ )

87 thoughts on “Benedict Cumberbatch

  1. These thespian types dont think the rules or the law apply to them do they?
    Rules are for the plebs and just because theyve been in a film or telly they get veto over the law?!
    Simply because of his name hes a twat,
    An if youve a mate whos been in Guantanamo?
    Find better mates!
    But then hes not really a mate is he?
    Hes a bragging right at Islington dinner parties 😀
    “My friend the terror suspect had too wear a orange jumpsuit!
    So last season!”
    But then Benderdick thinks waterboarding involves surfing.

      • It actually does, doesn’t it?

        A sabbatical is more and more attractive I’d imagine. Or try that cocktail. Don’t short on the Drinamyl – it’s an important potentiator of the opioids.

        I’ve just invested approximately $650 000¹ in gilts (issued by Vietnam through BZW, Deutsche, and a “boutique” investment house based in Pretoria). It is so copper-bottomed, the entire economy of the…..

        Lost interest. It’s copper bottomed alright. How the other half lives, I guess!

        ¹ a very “serious” investment. Around three years (net) salary from my current employ, for this pauper. A lot more than a lifetime’s service in the FCO would have furnished 🙂

  2. In an ideal world he’d be asking for a friend for the 14 years he spends in Gitmo for being a lefty lovely Adrenochrome guzzling cunt. Ricky Gervais need not apply apparently.

  3. The only contact iv had with the cunt Ive already said here but it was one of my proudest, finest hours so here it is again. The cunt was at the Barbican in 2015 informing the audience that the cunts crossing the Med needed saving after the cunt drowned his baby. Me “Shut up and act, you twat ” .Stunned silence. Then thrown out. It was worth the every penny. Today they are crossing the channel like cockroaches. Strange how the government can “close the borders” but cannot stop cunts crossing the English channel. There are now three times more illegal cunts (if you believe the bullshit figures) than the German operation sealion. It will have the same outcome.

    • I saw him there as well. I was waiting all evening for the cunt to go on about immigrants as, if he did, I didn’t know what I was going to do: walk out, huff, or whatever. You sir, did the right thing – I wishI’d been there on the same night as you.

  4. I’m surprised this weedy nerd isn’t on “The Wall” yet. I’ve cunted him at least twice, once when he did that anti-Brexit programme and once when he claimed he’d prevented somebody being mugged in Marylebone which was about as believable as Charles Hawtrey knocking out Mike Tyson in the first round.

    If there is anything worse than a wealthy, po-faced, “caring” celebrity admonishing society for virtue kudos, it’s this private-school, nasally cunt ameliorating his guilt by doing it.

  5. Guantanamo?

    Well what the fuck could possibly go wrong by inviting someone who’d been locked up, for 14 fucking years, due to being an extreme terrorism risk and part of Al Qaeda?

    Yes, just what the country needs.

    If this mongy chinned cunt wants to live amongst this lot, throw the cunt in Guantanamo too so he can be with his pals.

    Or drop him off at an AQ training camp. His next screen appearance would be an X rated video nasty, let’s put it that way.

    What an absolute fucking weapon.

    • Its de rigour and oh so very trendy nowadays to have friends in prison.
      That chinese lady Judie Dench is buddies with kenny Noye,
      And Gary Lineker has tea parties on D wing in strangeways.
      In Islington community centre they have a whipround for fair trade snout and artisan made shanks.

    • Benedict Cumberbatch is a useless cunt who spends his life pretending. I don’t think I’ve seen any movie or TV programme that he’s been in. However, if a halal butcher was separating his head from the rest of his body, I’d gladly tune in.

  6. Drop Cuntysnatch off over Syria and see how far his caring nature extends when he is picked up in a Toyota pickup by a troop of AK47-toting beardy carpet pilots.

    They will dress him in an orange jumpsuit and slowly saw through his long, thin, sinewy neck with a sharpened grapefruit knife until his bloody, fat, gormless great head rolls off into the sand. All captured on brilliant camera phone whilst some religious wailing music blares out in the background. Piss be with them.

    Just for Mossie shits and giggles of course.

  7. Should have sent Cuntybatch over to Guantánamo bay to do his hamlet there. The inmates would have been screaming to be waterboarded instead!

    “To be, or not to be shanked, that is the question”

    Fuck off!

  8. Not surprise this noodle necked cock end is sniffing around some smelly dune c**n with a sob story, especially when there is a pay check it for him. I suppose its slipped his mind that Obama promised and failed to deliver on shutting down Gitmo.

  9. I would love to make a new law. That law being cunts like Fanny Lineker and Benzedrine Cuntberdinck would have to have a couple of these camelfucking refugee types living in their mansions on a permanent basis. You like ’em? You live with ’em!

    As for Cuntberdinck’s acting? Arguably the worst Sherlock Holmes of all time. When those three cunts (the other two being that cunt Mardarse Freeman and that Irish bottybasher who ruined Moriarty) are on the box, the cuntometer goes into overdrive.

    • I imagine the wonderful Spoonington as a Nigel Bruce character-a lifelong batchelor with impeccable manners and a fine baritone singing voice.
      His IsAC “Holmes” would be our own Miserable-a character of obvious high intelligence, who disguises himself as a simple soul to remain “invisible”.

      I would be Lestrade-the fucking useless Inspector, who is more interested in banging Mrs Hudson. The saucy Scottish bitch😍

  10. One sure fire way to shut Cuntberdinck up about this. Tell the Close Encounters reject that he’d have to pay for Mohamedou Ould Slagheap’s bed and board, as well as his grub and healthcare. Watch the alien faced fuck scarper like shite off a shovel.

  11. Put your money where your mouth is you luvvie cunt.
    Swap places with the Swarthy Twat.
    He can come here and you fuck off to Cuba for a nice American torture holiday.
    PS:Please be aware that your Carpet Chum gets a welcome gift on arrival,slow oven til crisp.
    Fuck Off Forever.

  12. Well if he has those kind of friends I’d expect him to be closely monitored by HM security services at least.
    It’s a fucking sad indictment of this country’s newspaper journalism that this bullshit went to print with no hint of calling blundersnatch out for the anti British terrorist sympathiser he obviously is.
    I hope he eventually gets a poison umbrella up his jacksie!

  13. I have to laugh when they caught some of these British Peacefuls in some medieval fortress in Fuckknowsistan armed to the teeth saying they were on holiday and just happened to stumble on this place.
    The Yanks can do whatever they want with the shifty looking cunts for all i care.

  14. This Mohamedou Ould Slahi bloke hasn’t any right to come here, so fuck him and bendydick.

    He can have a nice holiday in Mauritania and they can chat about the injustices of the world.

    What a cunt!

  15. I see Johnson (and his paralysed with fear cronies) are taking the piss again… (when did he ever stop? – Ed.).

    Lockdown to end on the 21st of June – WTF?!

    Why not the 1st of April? All old cunts (and the otherwise vulnerable) should have been adequately vaccinated by then, so no excuse not to fully open up the economy and stop fucking with the nation’s emotional and mental elf, is there?

    Jesus forking Christ.

    (Please don’t derail this thread too much. There’s a BlowJob Boris nomination due to go live in the next day or so. – DA)

    • Non essential shops, etc to open by 17th April.
      God, I cant wait to go the boozer, go out with the family,
      Hiking in the peaks,
      Flashing on the moors etc

      Like most glad theres a end in sight.

      • A decent hair cut will be my first port of call, then the Hugo Boss shop for a new uniform.

        I’m currently rocking the Chewbacca hate fucked joseph Goebbels look.

      • The cunt Bozza said in March 2020 that the chingi batfink flu would last a mere 12 weeks.

        I’ll believe it when I see it. Too many stupid, selfish and thoughtless cunts here in Blighty for this thing to die out any time soon.

    • I’ll bet you right now that this won’t have ended by then. They’ll either drag it out until it blends into winter again and there’s a ‘new and improved vaccine resistant variant’, or it’ll happen before then.

      I hope I’m wrong. Unfortunately all signs are pointing to fark sake!

  16. He spoilt Black Mass as well. His Boston accent was more Lincolnshire than Massachusetts. And he looks like a fucking gook with those lizard eyes. Holier than thou champagne socialist tagnut.

  17. I’ve never liked this humourless, dour, soppy twat. What is it with these celebrity types, who have to have a ’cause ‘ to fight for ?
    I think it’s just attention seeking, he won’t believe in his ‘ cause ‘, it’s just a ploy to get into the spotlight.
    His ‘ job ‘ is to entertain.
    Something he’s not very good at.
    He should learn to take things a little less seriously, and enjoy himself.
    Like these two carefree souls, they couldn’t give a toss !
    Show us yer knickers !

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLMp1tb8O0k

      • Fuck me Toyah!
        Read ma lips. No new Taxes🤣

        I would deduce from that video:

        Shaven haven.
        Labia-plasti
        Dyson fan
        Elementary, my dear Miserable🤨

      • CG, Labia plasti ive heard of that!
        How marvelous!
        Tight an tidy.
        Katie price would be a big contract, plenty of overtime there!!😀

      • Jack: I would fucking volunteer as the IsAC Toyah front bottom inspector: I’m not a qualified gynaecologist but would have a proper fucking good look😀👍

        Etc, etc

      • Toyah obviously has been working out, had a bit of work done.
        Those tits are good for a 19yr old, and like to think shes had CGs labia plasti too!
        Shed be good advertising Sanatogen?
        Bit hyper, bit giddy,
        Fine in the bedroom but at a family funeral and shes doing handstands Id lose my patience.

      • Toyah is probably coked up to the gills. I’d hate to see her pissed at a wedding or a Christmas party.

      • Norm: I would love to see that👍
        Take her outside for some fresh air. Smash the absolute granny out of her.
        Perfect wedding😀

  18. Back to original IsAC name. Bendydick is history. How did Wanda Ventham spawn such an odious creature as Cumberbatch? I mean back in the 70s you ‘just would’. Did she take Thalidomide or something?

  19. Or was it a green Lamborghini?

    I nearly yesterday offered you (Coolforcunts) a well-paid job as a proofreader when you corrected my error about Lew Grade/Anglia/Associated TV yesterday. The clue admittedly was in the B50 address ibid.

    Sadly, you omitted the apostrophe at

    Lew Grades


    So “no cigar”. Nice try though!

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