Mumsnet

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Mumsnet… quite literally a bunch of cunts.

Who gives a shit? Its the managements right to decide, if you look like a granola eating, mountain climbing, liberal democrat, bio aware hippy breast feeder type, the management reserves the right to issue the old ‘off you fuck’. I have no problem with breast feeding in public, because I don’t have to look if I don’t want to, and I could not give a shit otherwise.

What I do give a shit about is some poor sod who wants uphold a certain stiff upper lip standard, and being told he is wrong. My establishment, my rules, feel free to fuck off anytime you don’t want to follow them.

And a word in the shell like of Mumsnet users. You don’t condone smacking, because its YOUR feral, mouth breathing offspring that are the annoying little cunts that should be flogged within an inch of their lives on a daily basis, to stop them from growing up to be big, selfish, self important cunts. But you feel it necessary to impose your way of reasoning with these young imbeciles and not teaching them any real values.

As for protecting your kids, you can rest assured even Jimmy Saville would not have ‘fixed it for them’, come to think of it most pederists would give your fucking irritating, tantrum throwing, self important, pampered little terrorists a wide berth. They are not kids, they are just narcissistic impressions of their parents.

For the love of christ, smack your kids at least once a day, just in case they do something.

Nominated by: The Captain

Coffee shop surfers

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I’ll tell you who are cunts: those poncey fuckers who spend all day in coffee shops with their laptops out, posing as writers or digital entrepreneurs.

Hogging all the tables, acting as though the coffee shop in question is their personal office and looking down their noses at customers with less interesting jobs than themselves, when everyone knows that REAL writers or digital entrepreneurs put in a hell of a lot of hard graft and don’t have hours to waste drinking overpriced coffee.

One day very soon I’m going to smack one of these cunts in the face with their cunting MacBook Pro.

Nominated by: Fred West

Jimmy Bullard

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Jimmy Bullard…..looking at the state of that fucking cunt as he sits in the pundits chair on MOTD, one wonders how he hasn’t been cunted a long time ago.

Shirt hanging open and what looks like an outfit Dave Vanian would appear on stage in, he’s the latest fucking celeb to be wheeled out on every friggin show.

Fuck off, Bullard you twat.

Nominated by: Dan

Bullard has only got onto MOTD because of his ‘I’m A Celebrity/Cunt’ appearance… Sky have got half decent pundits like Carragher and Gary Nev. While The BBC have Phil Neville and Jimmy Bullard…

Almost makes me long for the days of Alan Hansen

Nominated by: Norman

PJ Harvey

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PJ Harvey is a cunt…

PJ Harvey recording her ninth studio album as an exhibition within the Inland Revenue’s former staff gymnasium and rifle range at Somerset House, London ? What a pretentious cunt… She looks like a nag (as in horsey) too…

Nominated by: Norman

Headlight glare

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I nominate “1 billion lumen, brighter than my high-beams, brighter than the sun, ow my eyes are burning, inconsiderate LED headlights-using cunts”.

“Retinas? Who needs retinas? Retinas are for pussies!”……… cunts.

Even worse is when these fucking shit lords drive around in the day time with their LED headlights/fog lights on. Hey Chuckle Fuck! The sun has got his hat on…… and his ray bans …… and he’s squinting because of you, you cunt!

Nominated by: Lenny Long-Legg III