‘Enjoy’
When in the name of fuck did it become seemingly compulsory for those serving the food that you’ve paid for to order you to ‘enjoy’ as they walk off with a nonchalance only surpassed by the world champions of arrogance, Parisian Waiters.
Hang on a bastard minute, who the fuck do you think you are ordering me to ‘enjoy’ my food you cunt, you’re only 16, fuck off and get fingered like normal 16 year olds.
I’ll be the judge of whether I will ‘enjoy’ my food.
Of course I suspect this is some ‘Americanism’ that’s crept across the Atlantic, washed up in Londonistan then like all utter modern shite gained traction with the ‘über’ set who’s raison d’etre is to be like soooooo different.
‘Enjoy’. Fuck you. Cunt.
Nominated by CuntyMcCuntface





TONSILS and ADENOIDS
Why give these a cunting you might ask? Well I’ve always taken an interest in medical matters, largely because of my advancing years and the decrepit state of my body. During my extensive research, I’ve found that tonsils and adenoids are about the only parts of the body that can grow back after being removed. This can happen if all the tissues are not removed during surgery. I’ve come to the conclusion what a shitty God we’ve got. Who the fuck needs another pair of tonsils? When you think of all the useful body parts he could have regenerated, most of which would have benefitted me. A new heart pulsing fresh blood through my body? New legs to help me walk better? A new bladder to stop me pissing so much at night? Most of all a new willie for an old one to help me regain the vigour of my youth? No, WTF do I get – a new set of fuckin tonsils? I might have more success praying to Allah. Tonsils are a cunt.
Nominated by Bluntspeakingcunt