A cunting for Britain’s underclass.

I know there are people who need help from the state and I don’t begrudge them a penny. Life is hard enough. What makes life harder is the billions of pounds wasted on the idle cunts who say £25,000 a year of dole money is not enough for them to live on, when working families need food banks.

It’s not a cunting for everyone on benefits, but those who can work, and choose not to, even when they have no means of independent support, they rely on the hard work of others to eek out their grubby existence.

I’m also not in any way supporting Tory policies. They are inveterate socialists when it suits ; their bungling over HS2, the F-35 fighter, Chris Grayling handing cash to fake shipping companies and the shit value for money that contractors offer (G4S, Carillion, Capita) is a fucking scandal. I’d slash the funds available to those useless, wasteful cunts as well.

I also believe in us retaining a trace of compassion. Let the NHS deal with the disabled benefits and Work Capability assessments, and get rid of contractors (again) like Atos. Some things need to be done by the state.

On that note, some of those who might think voting Corbyn would ensure them free money for life might take notes from Romanians under the Ceaucescu regime; they were given housing, but they were also given work.

When the commissars come to put the idle on state-requisitioned buses to work on building sites, water treatment plants, or recycling tips, will they be rejoicing and posting pictures of their multicoloured fingernails ‘looking on-fleek’ to social media?

I’m sure Corbyn would never suggest it; what good is giving your new voter base jobs if they are terrified of work?

Better to follow Denmark’s example and give the idle what they want under a market economy with a squeezed middle class. We’re pretty much there as it is. Corbynov will just siphon off more from everyone.

Just remember not to tax the rich so much they decide to fuck off and you see your tax revenue fall.

Are you listening Jeremy? Jeremy?

Too busy having his photo taken with Iranian transsexuals while wearing a beret.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

English people who say this are cunts.

I swear you can’t go in to a coffee shop now without hearing some cunt say, “Can I GET a skinny latte”? What happened to “Can I have a coffee, please”?

This is England, you cunts. Stop this pretentious bollocks please, as it boils my piss every time I hear it. It doesn’t make you sound cool or trendy, it just makes you sound like a cunt. Fair play if you live in the Big Apple or you’re in ‘Friends’, but unfortunately you’re not.

You’re just some fat cunt in a shit coffee shop in the UK.

Nominated by Cunty mcfuckwit

Aisling Bea is a cunt, isn’t she?

As Irish as the potato famine and the car-bomb, I nominate this whiny-voiced, vinegar-faced banshee who’s famous for….erm…well, being on tv panel shows. What she lacks in the looks category, she doesn’t make up for in the accent department. Her strangulated, Irish vowels have the whiff of stale colcannon about them, no doubt the same odour as her unwashed quim.

Her idea of comedy is saying her pre-written “joke” to the host then turning to the audience at the punch line and gurning or saying, “ERRRM while rolling her eyes. Either that or saying, “Aye, dat’s grand.” Hilarious. Psh.

Isn’t it odd that these thin-lipped, caustic comediennes always drop in to their monologues about not having a boyfriend. Hmm, the answer might be more obvious than you think, toots: Shampoo. Oh, the irony. You won’t go out with an ugly bloke, but without your endless make-up you RESMBLE an ugly bloke.

For those unfamiliar with this giant of comedy, allow me to paint a picture: Imagine discovering you’d run out of bog paper after a squirty, gooey dump sponsored by curry, ale and a gallon of potent Shiraz; that’s about how funny this “comedic” “actress” is.

As a sort of weird, in-joke, Bea was the star of her own tv show (This Way Up) recently where, bizarrely, she played a teacher, helping Dooshka-Dooshkas to speak English correctly. Oh, dee oirony! If I can’t understand this witch’s garbled rants, how the fuck can a non-native unpick her mangled diction? Surely the main reason this gnarly-faced sourcunt came over to Blighty was to improve her English, yet now we’re asked to believe she can tutor foreigners! The episode I saw was littered with immigration and racism references, as well constant allusions to Brexit (said with a moan and an eye-roll). It’s like ‘Mind Your Language’ without the nuance, characters, and comedy.

She’s the least likeable Irish bint since Sinead O’Connor snarled her one hit. Bea must realise that she’s invited onto panel shows for token reasons (woman, Oirish) not humour reasons. Consequently she’s just another hackneyed, unfunny, anti-British clone needlessly shat out by Channel 4.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

God smite the remainer scum
While they do parliament up the bum
Send them fisted commissioners
And cunt faced lying cunts
Long to fuck up it all
God smash those cunts

MPs keep sucking cock
Slurping up the EU stock
From tuskies wick
Why must we suck the dick
Of fucking useless pricks
Fuck the EU

Fuck all theSNP, Fuck all the BBC
For attacking our liberty
Send our voters marching on
Stamp down that cunted con
How dare these despotic twats
attacking our liberty; seditious cunts

Nominated by dingly

Unbelievable. I’d like to cunt American rounders. Man with big glove does what crickets do with bare hands.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/av/baseball/50028101

For fuck’s sake, play a fucking game which you need balls to play.

American rounders is so shit, but why do people watch it? You don’t even have to bowl to the fucking batsman. You can bowl four no balls on the trot and they walk to 1st base so you can bowl to a shitty batsman and get him out. AND THAT’S a fucking sport? Only a brain dead cunt would watch that. I’d prefer to watch a five day match ending in a draw, but at least you have to get the cunts out.

Because so little goes on in a match, there’s time for adverts and endless stats that mean nothing. It truly is the fucking shittiest sport there is. Except cuntbasketcuntball. Why oh why does this drivel get so highly paid and watched?

Out of interest it’s the easiest fucking game in the world. Just loop the ball between the fielders. Play cricket shots with their stupid round bat. I never once got out it this stupid game with people pitching 85mph. Admittedly, it is faster in their top leagues, but you try hitting a cricket ball at 85 bouncing of the surface and keeping your teeth or scrotum intact. The best defence is a solid boner, but you can’t run quick singles without a waddle, and your just asking for a counting from the Aussies, either that or criminal carpentry insults will ensue.

Nominated by dingly