A four-wheeled cunting please, for car manufacturers who can’t put their tyre inflation guides in a fucking scale I can understand. Fair enough, the guide is on the nearside door pillar, but put the fucking thing up fucking higher, so I don’t look like Quasimodo trying to read it.

“Idea!” thinks your hero: take a photo. Took it… WTF it’s in Bars? Look, you Cheese-eating, Macron arse-kissing monkeys, put it in fucking PSI. I cant be arsed to look up the conversion factor on the following grounds:

1. It’s Sunday Morning.
2. I’m hung over due to coming second in the quiz night.
3. I cant find the fucking calculator.
4. She who will be obeyed is in a shittier mood than I for the above reasons.
5. My fucking head felt like it came off and rolled across the back yard.

Citroen, please pay heed to my plea. It’s the UK. It’s PSI, you wankers.

Got that? GOOD.

CUNTS.

Nominated by CuntyMort

So let us be the first to wish you all a Happy new year, What can only be described as the Decade of the deluded is now behind us, But lets face it what magnificent stories they made for us!

But as always it’s you the contributors who make this site what it is, so a heart felt thank you to you all (Yes even the Trolls who add the spice to the admin life) and wishing you all the best in the coming year.

All the best the Admin team

Self-checkout in grocery stores…

This is the second time this week I have needed to go to the grocery store for a few select things (most groceries I already have). Both times I proceeded to the self-check out station, only to find some degenerate with a full shopping cart, scanning each item one by one.

What the fuck??

The lesson learned: If you have a stockpile of thirty-plus groceries, get in line and wait for a cashier like the rest of us. Don’t be a cunt.

Nominated by Goodwill Cunting

I’d like to to nominate John Swinney please (this is my first attempt so please be gentle, fellow cunters!)

I came across (ooh er missus!) this little snippet of world-shattering news by accident:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-tayside-central-50821872

Apparently, Herr Swiney (see what I did there?) and an organisation calling themselves ‘Perth Against Racism’ are getting their collective knickers in a twist after some stickers bearing the slogan “It’s okay to be white” have mysteriously started appearing on lamp posts and drainpipes throughout Perth city centre. Swiney has been positively foaming at the mouth over it, ranting the “atrocious” stickers had “no place in Perth or any other part of our country” and “we must stand together to resist this unacceptable material.” One stupid cunt had this to say: “I am certainly worried now for my daughters who are not white, but are from Perth. It’s sickening and disgusting to know that people think like this.” Don’t worry, luvvie. I don’t think you need to worry about the Perth branch of the McKu Klux Klan coming to rape and murder you and your daughters in the middle of the night, dressed in their tartan hoods and kilts.

What I find especially ironic is that Swiney is the current deputy and ex leader of the Scottish Nazi Party, whose unashamed and palpable hatred of England and anything English doesn’t seem to constitute racism. Incidentally, his uncle, Tom Hunter (VC) is the only Royal Marine from the Second World War to receive the Victoria Cross and was killed in action. He would have been very proud of wee little Johnnie.

Quite clearly (and apologies if I am) I must be missing the point as to what I see as a violent overreaction to a few stickers. Just remove them and have done with it. I understand the slogan may have been picked up by neo-Nazi groups, but I believe that was in the USA.

Anyway, we don’t seem to have the same fuss over the Black Lives Matter movement, do we?

Nominated by Cupid Stunt