Stewart Lee

Stewart Lee is a smug, supercilious, condescending cunt. When I look at him I quite literally see a moaning, heaving slab of meaty cunt, sweating under the weight of its own massive cuntishness, like a congenitally impaired pug waiting to die.

I recently watched a video of him explaining how ‘Political Correctness’ was just “Institutionalised Politeness at worst”, as if this description wasn’t dangerously close to sounding anything like, I dunno, state-backed censorship or anything!!

He then went on about how every man and his dog was a massive racist bully until PC came along to teach us all manners and niceties to minorities etc etc. Riiiight!!! That’s probably party true. But, what about ALL the damage and carnage it’s done to Free Speech you cunt?! (that’s probably for another ‘Cunting’ time and place)

Also, we should be immensely grateful for this knowledge, of course, because everything Stewart says is so laced with unrivalled intelligence and cutting-edge thinking that if you aren’t laughing at the exact right moments, for the exact right amount of time or gleefully delighting in his carefully-worded prose, you are probably a morally deficient scum bag who loves Top Gear then beats his wife with gay person you killed earlier.

And so, on he rambled in his holier-than-thou, ‘my farts smell so beautiful, mmmm’ type way until I could swear I saw my testicles holding up knives to me saying “cut us off just so the pain can take your mind off this bloated vaginas excruciating bullshit”.

Listening to this, I couldn’t help but feel it’s shit sacks like Stewart who have inculcated the culture of professional umbrage-taking that has emerged online, in universities and in the media over the last few years.

Everything about Stewart Lee makes me choose to pour cement into my own anal cavity rather than have to sit through another snarky, preachy word coming out that fat fucks cunt hole. His comedy is just posturing for his mates at The Guardian and the laughter he does illicit is just self-congratulatory, self-regarding wanking designed to make you feel superior and somehow morally refined.

Cunt!

Nominated by: Jimmy Block-Bottom