Mariah Carey requires a cunting, doesn’t she?

Not for her annoying whine on every song.
Not for her awful dress sense.
Not for her making songs with d-list rappers in a futile attempt to appear relevant.
Not for having an arse the size of a bean bag.
Not because she released an album called No:1s but actually put in an apostrophe (cunt).
Not because the album No:1s contains a lot of No:2s (I mean the turds, not the positions).
Not because she’s more plastic than human.
Not due to her famous tantrums and subsequent bellicose demands at venues.
Not for being proud of being a truculent diva.
Not for the fact that although being half a century old, she still behaves like an over-sexualised teenage girl, despite increasingly looking like a drunken, transgender granny.

Not for any of these reasons. You know why she’s being cunted:-

That. Fucking. Song.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous