Estate agents are cunts!

Now I know everybody knows this already but if you’ve had any interaction with them lately you will have no doubt found they have turned into the biggest cunts ever!

For more than a couple of decades I have been planning an early retirement in Devon or Cornwall, having been down there many times on holidays and in later years with in-laws living there it seems ideal. I started looking seriously in 2018, but then of course not long after that Batflu reared its ugly head so I put it on hold! Now because of said batflu and with the rise of people househunting in the West Country as a laughable means of escaping it, estate agents in that area can afford to be surly, uppity and arrogant, you may well even be greeted halfway through a telephone call with them by an audible huff, as if even as a serious cash buyer you are wasting their now valuabe time by daring to ask, “can I just simply buy it and pay full price?”.

It is sad to say but I believe those words spoken in earnest all those years ago have now come true but I will leave it to my fellow cunters to make their own minds up….”In 15 or 20 years the estate agent will have the whiphand over the buyer”. Yes some of us laughed, even mocked those words, but now sadly, here we are!

I long for those glorious days not so far back where an estate agent would happily let you view a property, call you sir and give you a shoe shine on the way in if it would help them make a sale! Even now they are still serfs and oiks, every last one of them!

Fuck off!

Nominated by: TheBestRevengeIsLivingWell

A Hull man died after being restrained at Victoria station Manchester. He repeatedly said ‘I cant breath’ during the restraint. He subsequently died.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/jack-barnes-death-inquest-manchester-b1808325.html

He was allegedly off his tits on spice (an illegal drug of some kind – NA) at the time.

A few observations:

Neither Hull nor Manchester were burnt down and looted.
No footballers took the knee. Not even the Tigers (Hull FC)
There was no world wide reaction.
Boris Johnson hasn’t said how guilty the perpetrators are.
There is no square in Hull or even Manchester named after this unfortunate man.
Doreen Lawrence isn’t investigating on behalf of Sir Kweer.
His mother is naturally heartbroken but hasn’t had even a £million or so in compensation.
Lammy’s expertise hasn’t been called upon.

I wonder why?

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble

We have all seen the ‘reality’ programmes featuring these ginormous tubs of lard sprawled out on their re-enforced beds, wanting the world to feel sorry for them.
Firemen having to demolish walls so that a team of medical staff with the aid of an industrial hoist can get them into a specially manufactured ambulance and off to hospital.
The ‘reality’ for each of these fat fuckers is that on one day in the past they woke up and were completely unable to get out of their beds.
They subsequently shat themselves.
Anyone with even the smallest amount of self respect would be absolutely mortified and would vow that they would lose weight so that they are never in such an embarrassing situation again.
But these disgusting cunts wallow in their own foulage until a helper turns up to scrape the shit out of their huge arse cheeks and clean them up the best that they can.
Said helper is probably then dispatched to the cake shop to fetch a few boxes of breakfast.
The complete lack of self respect is astonishing.
They didn’t get to that stage quickly, they could have dieted at any time but decided not to.
I have no sympathy with them and I have no sympathy with their helpers who continue to clean and feed them.
The good news is that these horribly obeses cunts die young.
The bad news is for the pall bearers at their funerals.

Nominated by: The Artful Cunter

Imran Khan has several things going against him: he’s a Parking Stanley, he’s a peaceful and he’s a cunt.

He is urging Islamic shitholes to boycott Western products if our countries don’t criminalise ‘insulting’ the prophet and to launch a trade war against countries that hide behind “freedom of speech”.

And he comes out with shit like: “They do not even love the prophets the way we do with our Holy Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him). Even, they are not attached to religion (the way we are). They will have to be made it understood.”

https://www.breitbart.com/europe/2021/04/20/boycott-the-west-for-insulting-the-prophet-urges-pakistans-khan/

Imran Khan, if you want to boycott western goods go ahead. No cars, no planes, no trains, no mobile phones, no cancer hospitals in memory of your mother, no clean water, etc. What have Muslims ever invented other than jihad? That’s right, a big fat fucking zero.

Let’s do a trade deal Imran. We stop exporting our goods and services to you and you can stop exporting Parking Stanleys to us. Sounds like a great deal.

And as part of the deal we’ll send back your namesake Unhappy Richard (Sad Dick) Khan. Imran and Sad Dick – a proper pair of khants.

Nominated by: Hard Brexit Cunt

..and seconded by: CuntyMort

FFS Islam rides again.

Now the Pakistani P.M Is kicking off over insulting their sky fairy, with the threat of world wide Islamic embargos.

Here you go Imran how’s about my solution, Just fuck off. If you want to play those games, No immigration to anywhere. Your goods banned as well.

While I’m at it just fuck off CUNT.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9516043/Pakistan-PM-boasts-plan-Muslim-countries-force-blasphemy-laws-West-work.html

…and a very late entry from W.C, Boggs

IMRAN KHAN:

A gentle don’t take this the wrong way, comrade cunting, please, for the whacky Paki PM, who instructs the West not to “hurt the feelings” of Muslims around the world, but if we do, there will be trouble:

https://foxhole.news/2021/04/28/stop-hurting-the-feelings-of-muslims-pakistan-pm-tells-the-west/?fbclid=IwAR3VhGmuD1x0TqJVBNhrBMRqnqlLnssfxOgEGhNGUre3qy0jqWAgIO_BRZI

If we are guilty of hurting their feelings, they have hurt their victims far more than just feelings – but with death and missing limbs as well

I like a good plot in a book or film but I hate when people insist on telling it to you. My wife and mother-in-law just love to recount everything they can recall about some shit film or TV series they have been watching. My mother-in-law goes even further by telling us about meals she had 40 years earlier. “I had a fantastic steak in a restaurant in Sorrento in 1973. It came with stuffed mushrooms and a risotto and was cooked just the way I like it. The service was wonderful and the toilets were very clean.” Big deal!

Another irritating habit they have is to read bits of the newspaper out to each other at breakfast. As I am always up hours before them, have already eaten and read the rag, I know what it says so I don´t want to hear it again. Shut up both of you!

Nominated by: Mr Polly

Seconded by: Jessum Priest

Mr. Polly. You sort of had something there, but kind of spoiled it by making it a rant about wife and MIL.

Try this. I hate it when someone recommends a book to me, I’m a big reader, then spoils it by telling me what it’s about, including the shock ending.

Utter, utter cunts.