Okay guys. I set out on this cunting in full knowledge that it may appear idiosyncratic or lacking in relevance to the wider world, but I’m hoping that you’ll cut me some slack. I need to vent my spleen, and the object of my wrath is Aston Villa, the team I’ve had the ‘pleasure’ of supporting for sixty years or more (here I use the word ‘pleasure’ in the same context that some might apply it to self-flagellation).

Here’s the scenario. It’s 25th May, the last day of the Premier League season. Villa have got a great chance of securing a top five spot in the league and with it, participation in the 2025-2026 Champions League competition. To maximise their chances however, they ideally need to win their last game, and hope that at least one of their rivals fail to win. And here is where they come face to face once more with the dark side of The Force; their last match is away at Manchester United, the team against whom Villa have what must be the worst record in the PL by a country mile.

Now as it turns out, they didn’t even need to win. The Toon obligingly lost at home, meaning that just a draw for Villa would have been enough to secure fifth place at Newcastle’s expense. But this is the Villa we’re talking about. So what happened? They bottled it is what happened. They did what they always do at Old Trafford. They ran onto the pitch, promptly shat in their shorts, and proceeded to lose 2-0 against what is universally regarded as the worst Yanited side in donkey’s. Mad? I’ve got steam coming out of my ears.

Now I can guess what people may say. It’s only a game Ron. Think of your dodgy blood pressure. Relax. Be reasonable. Well all I can say is that my capacity for reason became stunted a long time ago where this club is concerned, and my response this morning is ‘fuck off Villa. JUST. FUCK. OFF.”. I think I’m done.

Erm… see you next season then I suppose…

Nominated by : Ron Knee

Who’da thought it?

Apparently Bonio is an even bigger cunt than we imagined.

”Bono: Stories of Surrender – A dire 86 minutes of yelping self-mythologising”

And we get:

”We all know Bono’s an egomaniac, a fact he’s well aware of himself, so none of this comes as a particular surprise. If anything, it’s his sporadic attempts at self-deprecation that feel more tortured and icky, like Trump professing humility all of a sudden.”

It seems that Bonio is so self obsessed that he doesnt realise what an utter cunt he comes over as. This was from an independent review in the Telegraph.

Bonio, super cunt. And he seems oblivious of it.

MSN

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble.

is a cunt.

Yet another “friend” of Starmer (though certainly not one of his male models by the size of him), this bloated wanker is the Attorney General. He has come out with some real crap over the past ten months, but yesterday he excelled himself.

Apparently if you would like to be rid of the European Court Of Human Rights, which always proves to be a rod for our own backs, and despised by me, and I am sure many others, is, according to that shit-stain, “a Nazi”. I am really sick of these subnormal virtue signallers who seems to be a few sandwiches short of a picnic, which infest our ramshackle government. Of course, Hermer will stay in post till Starmer is kicked out. We just have to try to keep our sanity for 4 years, unless yet more of his quare behaviour becomes public knowledge and he finally has to fall on his sword.

standard

Nominated by W C Boggs.

are cunts.

doesn’t exist they say. It’s all in your head they say.

I’m not quite sure that’s true, as this bbc headline story shows

bbcnews

I said to the wife when she showed my a Instagram video of this awful occurrence as it had just happened, I bet they won’t say anything about his colour or creed….not straight away anyway.. not if he’s a raggy or a blick.

and sure enough as he isn’t, but a white male, the police have had no hesitation within 2 hours of releasing his details.

they are all puffy chest about doing this because they say they have learnt from previous mistakes. I say bollocks to that, because sure as eggs is eggs if he wasn’t anything other than a white mail, we would still be waiting for info. I will take Liverpool police to task if something else happens on thus scale and it’s not a white mail and they take longer than 2 hours to release details.

if so,, there’s your two tier right there.

Nominated by Chuff chugger.

There’s every chance that like me, cunters everywhere have become sick and tired of the two words ‘Harry Potter’ over the years. The cunty boy wizard and his works have been everywhere these past couple of decades, endlessly promoted and hyped, shown and re-shown, printed and re-printed, and utterly merched to death.

Well just when it seemed that all the fucking hoo-ha might finally have died down a bit, more bad news breaks. It transpires that subscription telly giant HBO is to re-do the entire Potter canon, over seven ‘seasons’ no less. Just what the world of popular culture and entertainment needed, something entirely new and original. Not. As you’ll see from the undernoted link, yet another media blitz is about to get underway.

All the novels have already been filmed, and not that long ago at that, so why the need to film the whole bastard thing all over again? The Yank film and tv industry seems to be utterly obsessed with the idea of remakes and ‘re-imaginings’, often to the detriment of new ideas. Or maybe JK’s down to her last couple of billion and feels that her finances need a leg-up.

So yet another ‘classic’ gets a re-do, whether or not it actually needs it (and this one fucking well doesn’t). It’s utter saturation of the market. As an aside, it remains to be seen just how much Rowling (who seems very anti ‘woke’) might let the makers get away with in terms of using the series as a vehicle for foisting any possible ‘progressive’ agenda on the audience if they’re that way inclined. It seems to be very much the Hollywood way these days. As politicians are prone to say, ‘we’ll just have to wait and see’. Personally I can’t wait.

Express.

FREE DOBBY THE HOUSE ELF!
with every box of Persil.

Nominated by : Ron Knee