Regional Commercial Radio

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They all play the same fucking songs and get the local news from somewhere like the ‘Sky News Centre’.

One of my brother’s mates used to work for a local station and during the noughties there was a severe stunting of creative freedom by the executives on behalf of the corporate group (Bauer media) that had bought the station. It was deemed that a local station should no longer feature a programme showcasing local bands or singers, even on a Sunday night. The management wanted the same music and programming all of the time, because they felt a programme about local talent was no longer part of the station’s ‘identity’. Rrright.

Because of this they forced these presenters to play the same old ‘contemporary adult’ mush – Adele, Take That, Keane etc – as the primetime ‘personalities’ the rest of the week, as well as other regional stations, such as Wave 105 (where another mate of mine had worked and thought was dogshit).

This has lead to an exodus of young talent as the more discerning, ambitious and creative types move into podcasting or more genre-specific DAB stations.

I now find regional stations are all the same, and the adverts are constant and repetitive to the point of distraction. Any banter is thoroughly ‘approved’ by corporate cunts and twee as fuck. The playlists are all identical and thoroughly sterilised, with both the aforementioned mush and music by children for children (One Direction kept getting played- very strange on a building site, Katy Perry less so).

The playlists of these stations is so anodyne, that since 2000, my guess for the most played out song of various site and work radios is either Life is a Rollercoaster by Ronan Keating or Torn by Natalie Imbruglia.

If anyone has any other contenders for overplayed songs on commercial radio, well phone in or email us with your suggestions but first here’s the news with some 14 year old girl..

Sussex-Express

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime.

85 thoughts on “Regional Commercial Radio”

  2. I try to avoid all radio if I can, it’s infested with cunts, normally television cunts..

    So you have been on tv so that qualifies you to be a radio host?

    Jimmy Savile would be spinning in he’s grave at the likes of Russell brand deejaying

  3. At least it’s somewhere to dump those fucking news readers that drone on in that cunting way of speaking.
    “Here are the headlines at 1pm. You’re going to smash the fuck out of your radio when you hear my voice. Oh, you already have”

  4. Back in the 70s and 80s I used to listen to pirate radio on some dodgy radio receiver thingy. Shit quality in terms of signal strength, but the music was radically different from the complete toss on BBC Radio 1. (the days of Tony Blackburn, Jimmy Young, DLT and assorted daytime cunts).

    I also listened with great enthusiasm to my local commercial station – BRMB – based in Aston, Birmingham. Admittedly their daytime output was no different to that of Radio 1, but with the added annoyance of commercial breaks between tracks.

    But come the evening sessions (7pm to 3am) it was a whole different ball game. Records from local bands were the norm, along with indie stuff and themed nights (metal on a Friday; ska on Mondays, punk on Saturdays etc)

    But then it all went to shit when BRMB was taken over by some national corporation and their bland tick-box commercial shite 24/7.

    Fuck ’em

    • Those were the days.

      We could really relate to Tony Blackburn with his ridiculous haircut and woolly jumpers.

      We all aspired to be like Jimmy Young.
      Sales of cardigans went through the roof.

      And DLT.
      How we laughed when he called himself The Hairy Cornflake.

      All massive cunts.

      • Tony Blackburn – what a softarse cunt he was when he found out that his girlfriend – the fragrant Tessa Wyatt – was playing away behind his back!

        He blubbed about it on live radio for fucking ages. Didn’t change a thing. But Tessa was very boneable back in the day!

      • Blackburn protested when “ Yes “ came on top of the pops playing yours is no disgrace

        I did like sounds of the sixties on radio 1 with Brian Matthew’s on a saturday morning

  5. Africa by Toto was always on when I got home after I bailed out of work early on a Friday to “romantically interfere” with Mrs Terry..

    Commercial radio is a proper hamsters wheel..probably only a couple of dozen songs played in rotation.

    Better off with some Internet radio..some belting stuff from far flung places,not ruined by corporate cunts.

  6. I honestly can’t remember the last time I heard the Bauhaus tune ‘Rose Garden Funeral of Sores’ on the wireless. They always seem to play Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ instead. Cunts.

  9. I fucking hate radio, can’t stand radio DJ’s – all they do is want to listen to their own voices and talk about how amazing they are.

    Rather watch paint dry, or watch Mrs. Browns boys on TV.

    • Fuck me, that’s Radio 2… Zoe fucking Ball rabbiting away over the intro to every single record played!!

      • I never listened to Ball’s show. The only time I heard her was the times she was brought in when Ken Bruce was away.

        Jeremy Vine always seems to taken time off. Probably rolling about on his bed, whining because a car drove past a bit too close, or some insensitive fucker mentioned ‘bell’ and ‘field’ in the same sentence,
        and now he’s traumatised.

      • I’m so glad they finally got rid of that cunt Steve Shite in the afternoon.
        Hi Steve hate the fucking show you cunt

      • TNH. I didn’t mind Steve Wright in the Afternoon back in the 90s. He was pretty funny compared to the cunts that preceeded him of a morning – ie. Gary fucking Davies and Dave Lee Cuntface and his “Love Song” bollocks.

        But Ann Nightingale was my go-to radio DJ, and of course she also did ToTP and more importantly, the Old Grey Whistle Test.

        Nice tits!

      • Steve and his team of sycophantic bores and their shite fact-oids, which is a way of saying some random old shit that sound as if they’re facts, but might not be.

    • Gruesome memories return to haunt me from the 80’s.(Piccadilly 261) from Manchester.The fetid swamp that nurtured the early years of Chris Evans and Gary frikin Davies.Every window seemed to have the tacky purple 261 sticker stuck to the panes blighting the eye.

      At least they had reasonably good music to play befor everywhere went ‘Gold FM’
      (Werthers original territory).

      A pox on em all.So bad l sold my rather nifty Bosewave radio for buttons on the basis there’s just nothing out there worth tuning into and l don’t regret it one bit.Trappist FM a concept who’s time has arrived ?

    • I like BBC Radio 6 Music at times. That show fronted by Chrissie Hynde and Iggy Pop playing some class tunes and reminiscing about getting loaded was ace.

      It does, however, come across as a bit sneery and “we’re too cool for you” depending on the presenter. The Sam Beau and Bender Fests for Black History Month and Pride Month were nauseating, too.

      Upon reflection, it actually looks like I don’t actually like BBC Radio 6 Music much. That’d explain why podcasts mostly get a hammering from my Spotify account.

      Good day, one. Good day, all.

      • A lot of muso types love a good sneer.
        I grew up during the height of adulation for Radiohead. I used to take the piss and call them the poor man’s Black Lace.

  11. Regional Radio is the worst thing in the world. We used to have Lincs FM rammed into our ears at work, one cunt we work with thought it was great. It actually used to make my feel physically violent. I used to bite his head off almost some days. The cunt. If we lived in the US I may well have been triggered into a gun rampage, honestly. This year Lincs FM changed into Greatest Hits and for a while that was great (90s music is the cut off point, so no ’00s shit!)… but even that’s become repetitive now, fuck me, did The Jam only release one single?? The first thing I do when I’m on late shifts is put my headphones on and fire Spotify up when the management have all gone home.

    I am actually of a strong and serious belief that these radio stations are detrimental to a normal person’s mental health.

    • Couldn’t agree more.Almost like an extension of MK-Ultra for sapping the soul with wall to wall dross.

  12. Not so-much commercial radio, but Radio 1. The only good bits with that station usually happened during the evening sessions with the likes of John Peel, Tommy Vance and Anne Nightingale.

    Tommy was especially ace with his Friday Night Rock Show between 10pm and midnight. Back in the day I’d come home pissed after a night out with the lads, and would listen to Tommy playing some Scorpions, UFO, Thin Lizzy, Saxon and Motorhead etc, and have a blood good head bang!

    Felt shit the morning after of course, but what the hell!

  13. “All we hear is Radio Gaga”

    Nothing like Tommy Vance any more; nothing like BRMB either (remember when they broadcast a gig by The Redbeards From Texas, which was both excellent if you like ZZ Top and hysterically funny)

    Sunshine Radio was great when I was working on a Saturday; the DJ had a thing for The Wildhearts and used to play ‘I wanna go where the people go’ without bleeping the line ‘I wanna be where the cunts like me are buried six foot under ground’; marvellous, but now sadly lost.

    We now have Planet Rock (Bauer) and Absolute Classic Rock (Radio Predictable, also Bauer) which is largely shite (apart from some of the actual music) and they’re now getting rid of Alice Cooper, who was brilliant on ‘Nights with…’

    Honourable mention to the fact that Ian Danter is getting a Monday night gig and The New Rock Show which proves that, just occasionally, people can still make decent music.

    Local radio is so full of cunts that I’ve not been near it for decades.

    • Bloody hell,surely not thee Bauer ? Owners of Monsanto and spawned originally from the Nazi pharmaceutical behemoths-IG Farben,purveyors of Zyklon-B.amongst other nefarities.Tell me this isn’t some kind of bad dream,feedback loop ?

  14. Planet Rock.
    A fucking disgrace.
    They’ve got what seems to be a few rock greatest hits cds.
    They just load them into the player, press the random button and that’s the format for the show.
    The DJs/presenters/annoying time wasting cunts, drawing a wage for doing fuck all apart from talking drivelly shit.
    Ads every 20 minutes.
    Especially shite on a Sunday morning when they proudly featured the hairy biker bastards with their witless inane banter. 2 fucking hours of torture.
    They mercifully fucked off and we’re replaced by Danny Bowes.
    Great, a proper rocker, lead singer with Thunder, he’ll get it sorted.
    Nope, same fucking tired playlist as the other cunts.
    The only exception is Joe Elliot on a Saturday early evening.
    He’s not afraid to buck the trend, but it’s only one hour a week.
    I stopped listening two years ago when they started playing Kenny Rodgers.
    Kenny fucking Rodgers on a rock station.
    Slack cunts.

    • I came across something a couple of weeks ago about that ‘well know rock group’ ……. Maroon 5! I thought I was fucking hearing things.

    • That’s the thing about radio stations, Youve got to/
      know when to hold ’em/
      Know when to fold ’em

    • Fuck me,country and rock don’t even belong in the same sentence.Country rock to a degree (Doobies,Little Feat maybe) but distinctly not KR.although prior to his fairly excellent but later garbage musical offerings,l seem to remember him fronting a fairly decent rock act . Edition or some such ?

    • Hairy “bikers”? Couple of frauds – the bike thing is just a gimmick, like everything else in the media. The bikes they used in one of the tv series were for sale a few years back (as the series had finished). Each had about 60 miles on the clock – only used occasionally for a few tv shots. Cunts.

  15. where i live we have “Heart FM “
    The playlist consists of about 12 records. The DJ’s are mindless morons and extremely patronising, talking to the listeners like children.
    It attracts Chavs and single mums

    • Radio 2 has started copying Heart and Magic under the guidance of Belfield nemesis, Helen Thomas.

  18. Stopped listening to radio ages ago. I’ve amassed thousands of my favourite songs on my phone which are all downloaded legally of course

  20. Back in the day I’d listen to Sunday’s Top 40 on Radio 1, on my radio-cassette recorder (for younger cunters, do a Google in case you don’t know).

    I would record only the music the best I could, but inevitably the fucking DJ (who’s name escapes me right now) would butt in 30 seconds from the end with some charmless bollocks, thus ruining my full recording of a particular favourite Top 40 track.

    I’m pretty sure this “interruption” by the DJ was intentional so as to placate the record company in case cheap-skate cunts like me preferred to record the track rather than go out and spend a quid or two buying the single from my local Virgin Megacunt Store or HMV.

  21. Bauer and Global are known in the trade as “The Borg”. You will be assimilated and achieve homogeneous perfection.
    The Radio Garden website or app (via a VPN) allows you to listen around the world. There’s some interesting stuff, even if it’s only because it’s not the usual shite.
    Some of the Dutch low power stations do a good impression of the pirate stations of the 60′ and 70’s.

    • Global’s gold is an endurance test; The same old crap repeated, interspersed with bland news reporting, adverts for people at death’s door and old rubbish like ‘Music of the Future, Music of the Past’ by John Miles and ‘Now is the Time’ by Jimmy James and the Vagabonds.

      Dreadful.

    • Sarah Kennedy and Alex Lester.Accompanied me on many a weary mile.The horror of losing the signal after de-ferrying at Le-Havre for a few miles into French Radio terrain.The horror.

      • Sarah Kennedy used to make me laugh. Often pissed. And her story about not seeing the black paper-boy until he opened his mouth – classic.

  23. I like BBC Radio 6 Music at times. That show fronted by Chrissie Hynde and Iggy Pop playing some class tunes and reminiscing about getting loaded was ace.

    It does, however, come across as a bit sneery and “we’re too cool for you” depending on the presenter. The Sam Beau and Bender Fests for Black History Month and Pride Month were nauseating, too.

    Upon reflection, it actually looks like I don’t actually like BBC Radio 6 Music much. That’d explain why podcasts mostly get a hammering from my Spotify account.

    Good day, one. Good day, all.

    • Afternoon CC

      I don’t mind a bit of 6 music myself but you’re quite right regarding the smug pretentiousness of certain presenters.

      With regards to kissing the arse of black’s and “white man bad” an all – then 6 music are unfortunately all over it.

      The music is generally good and varied but the rest of it is fucking shite.

      • Hello, HJ,

        All well?

        Yeah, I remember being out in the family wagon last year, and one presenter was going on about “Louisiana-inspired Creole hip-hop” in a really sneery voice, so I turned it off in favour of some good ol’ Honky Music (see, Clutch and Green Lung) courtesy of Apple CarPlay! 😁

        Does Johnny Marr still present on BBC R6? He’s not a bad bloke.

    • The radio shows by Inpirals mainman Clint Boon are always good.
      And the last stand of the great Tony Wilson (RIP) on Radio Manchester, of course. One of the true greats was Tone.

      At least Mike Sweeney is still on. 👍
      But that little cunt Terry Christian can fuck right off.

  24. If you’re somebody who doesn’t appreciate local commercial radio and it’s relentless dirge, then silence or the sound of machinery in the workplace is far more preferable.

    I’m incredibly lucky where I can decide what music is played in the background at work.

    Hasn’t always been the case though and I’ve packed a job in because of relentless commercial radio in the past.

    One fella (in authority) I used to work with used to refuse point blank to listen to anything else other than the local station.
    He’d have it on in his car, his house, the warehouse and if you got in a work van after the cunt then you could guarantee what the radio was tuned to.

    Looking back – the fat fucker was definitely on the spectrum in one way or another. A real oddball with some kind of learning difficulty, a lack of social etiquette or something.

    Probably the only type of people who listen by choice to local commercial radio as it happens.

    If I was a prisoner in Guantanamo Bay and they played commercial radio non stop with its predictable playlist of songs and dreadful DJs then I’d probably confess to anything.

    • I developed a knack, from working in warehouses over the years, for mentally blocking any shit music I’m being forced to listen to.

  25. I agree with this nom, in places. Commercial radio can be ok and sometimes quite good. On my manor is a cracking station called radio ninesprings which covers sarf zummerset, they play some right good stuff. Ghr radio is a bit meh apart from lord ken bruce, simon mayo, jakki brambles, richard allinson, they could blow radio 2 out of the water if only they picked some better music.

    • Sounds pretty good apart maybe Allinson.He stuck in my craw at radio 2 for a while.Too corporatey and smarmy sort of the DJ equivalent of that twat Dr Hillary Jones.Guess he could’ve improved ?

    • Greatest Hits is Bauer-owned and playlist is as basic as it gets. Popmaster is the only reason i’d listen to it at work, same with radio 2.

  26. All commercial radio is 🚽🚽🚽🚽.Mindless drivel.Especially Global shite and Bauer media.Petrol and a match 🔥🔥.Wankers.

    • Global’s Gold or Radio Gah-gah, Radio Reaper for old cunts sitting by the sunny window at the home.

      ‘Music of the future… music of the..

      The swing of a scythe

      ..past.

  27. Even worse now that old boring cunt who did “popmaster” from R2 is on…retire you old cunt….!!

    • At least Ken was a proper DJ who knew his shit, Arch.😉

      His replacement is worse. The ‘Ee Bah Gum’ tailors dummy Vernon Kay. A complete and utter brainless cunt.

  28. Where the once great Piccadilly Radio 261 ruled the airwaves in Manchester, we now have the soulless to its core 103FM. Featuring celebrity never spun a record in their lives cunts like Kevin Webster’s lezza daughter off Cuntionation Street and that fat fucker with the tiger make up from Phoenix Nights. The rest of the DJ roster is pooves who screech with relish about Megain and Harry, these cunts make Phillip Schofield look like Sly as Rambo.

    And what do they play? The well past it Kunty Perry is still a favourite. But is there one song of hers that is not a pile of crap? Lardboy Capaldi also tortures the eardriums every day. The thunderous and ever repulsive Lizzo, of course. And the two biggest and most horrible mainstays of this shit? Who else? Adele and Ed Sheercunt. That’s all people hear all day, every day. Adele and Ed Sheercunt. Adele and Ed Sheercunt. Adele and fucking Ed Sheercunt.☹☹☹

  29. Tony ‘The Greek’ Michaeledis.

    Jangle Pop, Sunshine Pop, Psychedelic, Garage Band, Power Pop specialist. You name it, he knew it.🎵

    Now there was a great DJ with a a top radio show.

  30. Imagine a true pioneer and a total loose cannon like Sir Kenneth of Everett on modern radio? He’d be off air within minutes. He’d drive the woke hordes insane. RIP.

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