Jay Blades (2) – Repair Shop Cunt

Posted on by

Trying to find a decent non-woke programme on the BBC these days is like trying to find an honest politician.

Nevertheless, the wife pointed me in the direction of “The Repair Shop” and the current series (s8 I think). And oh my, what a wonderful programme it is!

It follows a familiar formula of people bringing in their old antiques and curios that are in need of desperate repair. Most of the punters just want to pass on these heirlooms to their kids, although one suspects the more attractive items may well end up at an auction site for a profit.

The craftsmanship for each item is absolutely spot on, and it is a pity the show isn’t a little longer because it really is quite fascinating watching these genuine experts repair all sorts of antiques, paintings, clocks, watches and soft toys.

But there is one weakest link, and that’s the “presenter”, Jay Blades.

He walks around the repair shop like a clueless foreman, pretending to be interested in the items and what they mean to the punters, but in reality is more bothered about making sure the job gets done on his watch!

He wears a leather apron, and drinks copious amounts of tea in a mug (which seems appropriate); and puts on a rather bogus Cockney accent, as if he’s one of the lads.

But in essence like most foreman, he does fuck all throughout most of the show. It’s only when the punters come to collect their repaired antiques does this cunt turn up trying to look interested, while at the same time having the balls to put his hand out in the hope the punter will shake it as a measure of appreciation for his involvement – all 6 buckets of fuck all to be precise!

Take that cunt out of the equation and this show would be 10/10, and worthy of a small chunk of my licence fee. But as it is, this cunt is like a dollop of horse shit you’ve just driven over in your car, and sticks with you like a bad smell for the rest of the journey.

Cunt!

Nominated by: Technocunt

66 thoughts on “Jay Blades (2) – Repair Shop Cunt”

  1. That little shit is dark key version of Arfur Smiff – the little Cockney Wanker who in real life probably dines at the Ivy, crooks his little finger as he drinks Earl Gray or those little thimble sized cups of coffee, wears a smoking jacket, and smokes his cigarette with a nice long holder….

    But perhaps not, for, in the words of the great man himself “I ‘ave been a builder, a Philosophy stoodent….and now I paint chairs black all over except for one leg which I paint bright yellow”. Effnic innit?

  2. It is actually a good format for a show, with some of the items having a genuinely interesting history like stuff that has survived the trenches of the First World War but recently has become overly sentimental with lots of crying about dead grandmothers or some cunts terminal illness.

    I think Jay Blades just hangs around sweeping up to get a look at the more valuable items to steal later on in the carpark.

  3. ‘Bogus Cockney accent’? You mean he doesn’t yap in a bogus Jamaican accent, sounding like Captain Tobias Wilcox of Coconut Airways?

    • Of all the many things about modern day Britain that boils my piss (and there are a fucking lot) that stupid Jamaicn/African/inner city yoof fake illiterate accent probably takes the biscuit. Or should that be ‘da biskit innit’

      Even worse still when white cunts (footballers such as half wit Harry Kane) attempt to do it.

      Stupid stupid cunts

    • He is a cunt but he was born and raised in the East End of London so I expect his accent is real.

  4. Typical BBC puppet.

    The Repair Shop is one of the very few things left on the telly that’s worth watching but this fella floats about pretending to be a geezer and serves no other purpose than to tick a diversity box.

    When I first seen the program I naively assumed Jay Blades was one of the expert craftsmen but it soon became very apparent that the cunt probably would struggle to wire up a 3 amp plug.

    Blades, for some reason, was also on the beebs excellent Gods of Snooker documentary recently offering his tuppence worth of oppressed minority perspective and worthless insight into the history of the green baize.

  5. It started well, but is now mawkish sentimentalism “oh yes, this is great uncle Albert’s truss. It means so much to our family, which is why we’ve left it to rot in the garden for thirty years.” Cunts

    • I did wonder about this!
      These cunts who bring in wrecked and tatty antiques that used to belong to great great great granddad, and then bleat “its been in the shed/loft/cellar/cupboard for 50 years looking for some TLC”. Why didn’t these cunts go find a repairman back in the day?

      But no. They hang on to their tat in the hope they’ll get a call from the BBC for them to appear on the show, and get it all down free of fucking charge (other than by the licence payer!)

      Tight fisted cunts

  6. Well, I was initially drawn to this show but now refuse to watch it for all the reasons above.
    I don’t know why Jay is there. Format would work just as well without him. Must be there for some other reason…
    They are now only interested if the punter will cry a bit.
    I also remain unconvinced about the repairs too. No way do they all occur in that twee little barn.
    I repair lots of stuff and if another person says “you MUST watch the repair shop,” I’ll punch them in the face.

    • Jays a right fuckin chancer!
      More work in that leather pinny he wears.
      Master craftsman my arse.
      Having a team of skilled people is ok,
      Its like me holding a first aid kit and standing with a bunch of neurosurgeons and saying just call me doctor.
      Jay is a student of philosophy 😀
      His philosophy being
      ‘take credit for others work’.
      I dont watch the Repair shop anymore,
      All posh cunts wanting thing fixed without putting their hands in their pockets.

  7. Never seen him before.

    But two things about him immediately scream “CUNT” – those giant black glasses and that silly artists hat.

  8. His attitude towards the black punters when they come and go is different to the way he addresses the whites.

    It’s subtle, but it’s there.

    A waste of space, injected into the programme for no other reason except to tick the diversity box.

    Fuck him off and improve the show.

  9. And the poof, half black chippy.

    Good at what he does, but does he really have to wear a 30 grand Rolex Submariner at work?

      • Married in the same way as Philip Schofield is married no doubt.

        When his popularity starts to wane there will be the usual ‘coming out’ with hugs and tears all round.

        A left footer, without question.

  10. I can’t be doing with the bullshit sentimentality and the tears. It’s like an X Factor audition at a provincial arts and crafts fair. Asides from that and Jay Blades MBE (really?) it’s a great idea for a telly program.
    By the way, take a look at Mr Blades wiki page. Especially the bit about his father. It made me chuckle.

      • Why does Jay wear that leather apron anyway?
        Hes not welding
        Hes not a blacksmith
        He just sweeps up and paints one leg on a chair.
        Just wear a old t-shirt if frightened of paint .
        It irritates me.
        Type of cunt who wears a wetsuit because its raining
        Or a astronaut helmet to go on a rollercoaster.

    • Well, that’s me on the sobbing table for the rest of the day! Poor Jay, the only thing that was left out was his struggle to walk again with his prosthetic leg. Oh, wait..

      • ..and I experienced poverty when I was in junior school. But does that make me special? Nah, of course not.

        Blades is just another cunt with a chip on his shoulder (pity one of the craftsman in the show doesn’t get a hammer and chisel and chip it off for him. Or better still takes his head off!)

    • My brother auditioned for a cooking show and seemed to be doing well enough.

      Then they arksed him about his back story.

      What?

      Well any emotional baggage you want to share on the show?

      Hmm not really I’m just an ordinary bloke who likes cooking.

      End of candidacy!

  11. I like this programme and started to watch Jay and Dom’s Home Fix, which is a bit of a spin off of the Repair Shop. It shows off Jay’s skills of finding junk in skips and turning them into shit.
    Jay has no talent and is a lazy chancer.

    • I like rooting in skips and can fuck up a restoration as good as the next man.
      Am I offered a tv show?
      No.
      Because im hideously white.

      And I swear at customers.
      And laugh at tales of woe.
      This show is racist .

  12. It’s all tokenism. The BBC being typically woke with a Dar Key presenter.
    Still. Better than that Orange Cunt, a typical east end Yid who you wouldn’t buy a second hand motor off .

  13. How could Blades done all thatb ook learnin’ innit if he was illiterate?

    I think his “story” changes to fit the circumstances, frankly

    As regards the programme, like so many others they run it into the ground – 8 series in a couple of years? Overkill – there used to be an evening series running concurrently with the original daytime series.

    Talking of daytimes, the highly creative and original Dave and Harry Rich are leaving Garden Rescue after the current series and being replaced by a dark key woman and a tranny “man” with a high pitched girly voice. Diversity is our strength. Innit?.

    Lisa Nandy and me are still waiting for the commission to produce our first series of “International Striptease” live from the Steaming Pussycat Club, Soho.

  14. Do people write their own Wikipedia information?

    One of 26 children sired by his father.
    If your father was that feckless how exactly would you know that you have 25 half siblings.
    Do they all keep in touch?

    Only diagnosed with dyslexia at the age of 31, after being admitted to university.
    It wasn’t picked up that he is a thick cunt during the selection process?

    The charity that he set up failed which cost him his marriage and made him homeless.
    So the charity which was supposed to be helping the disadvantaged was actually funding his lifestyle, and despite him failing dismally in that apparent fraud he was especially chosen as a trustee for another charity.

    He is a stereotype thick, black fraudster (allegedly).

  15. No idea what the show is and would probably not watch it…the telly is swarming with these repair / upcycle / stolen item shows that make me want to vomit.

    And where did you get this gold bar madam? My mother was given it by an old employer…yeah right.

    The guy in question sounds like that fat pie eating cunt Mike Brewer who always used to spoil Wheeler Dealers for me before I stopped watching it.

    He can upcycle a Victorian chair leg up his puckered old ass for all I care…cunt.

    • Mike Brewer is a grade A cunt. Edd China was the only bit worth watching, yet we had to endure half the program devoted to the fat gobshite brewer. All he did was buy a car, let edd do all the work and flog it for a song, usually losing money in the process. He stiffed china good an proper. I fucking hate mike brewer.

    • Edd China is God!
      He was what made Wheeler Dealers watchable. Couldn’t give a fuck about Brewer’s “wheeler dealering” bollocks for the first 20 minutes. But watching Edd take a car apart and put it all back together again was pure artwork in action.

      Fortunately, he has his own YouTube channel and his “Workshop Diaries”, which following a slightly different format in that he repairs not only cars, but bikes, tanks, submersibles… in fact anything mechanical and with an engine, and he’s on the case!

      https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL1kPAxOddPS_OyniophdZIRP2uuXCD8V-

      • Edd should team up with Ant Anstead (also ex Wheeler Dealers) and Hubnut from Youtube to make a new classic car TV programme. It would be a winning combo. Hubnut would take Brewer’s place, but is much much more knowledgeable and affable and certainly not a gobby cockney cunt.

        Edd and Ant could team up in the workshop and produce the goods. What wouldn’t there be to like?

      • I have it on good authority, (friend’s wife who works in television), that it was Edd China who was the difficult one to work with and Mike Brewer is a genuinely friendly, nice bloke. Doesn’t take away China’s mechanical know-how, but, just to add balance to the argument. I prefer Elvis, in the new series, personally.

      • I’ll concur with DCI, I saw Mike Brewer for what he is and accepted that.

        To me I his cheerfulness and enthusiasm were genuine and he really made the show for me. And his haggling to purchase wasn’t as excruciating as it could have been, and he was fair and straightforward during the selling stage.

        And China was great too, knew the deal, did the job. Good TV

  16. No doubt this Blades geezer, whoever he is, will be appearing on future lists of important persons of colour who helped make Britain Great. Steve Coogan will play him in a six part docudrama for the BBC.

    Good morning, everyone.

  17. I was at the tip in Altrincham some time back.
    He was hovering around like a fly looking for shit.
    (He was in the right place so an apt metaphor!)
    One of the items I was chucking caught his attention.
    A vase with fake branches in that had lights attached to them.
    It was getting chucked as there was something wrong with the adaptor, and it had stopped lighting up.
    He got that excited I thought he was going to mess up his pants while the cameras were rolling.
    In my head, I was thinking this.
    “Leave me the fuck alone. I have this shit to dump at the tip, then shopping, then do some errands and chores for my disabled mum, and then go home to support my disabled wife, etc, etc.”
    After typing that, I should have said that to him, as it would have made a great ‘bleeding heart’ moment for his show.
    The guy is a complete waste of sperm.

  18. Can’t say I ever watched this as I ditched the BBC a while back (vote with your feet where you can!). Looks a right on woke cunt though.

    Why’s he wearing a hat indoors? Is it because the Cherry Blossom wouldn’t stick to the top of his balding pate?!

  19. Whenever one of the actual workers needs anything special this Jay cunt is there.

    ‘I’ll order it for you’

    You have the idle, black guy in charge of the petty cash?

    Recipe for disaster.

  20. Happy to report that I have seen his show-only read about him on here.
    Looking at his Wiki entry, he is obviously a black Walter Mitty.

    Chris Eubank without the sporting prowess or monacle👎

  21. What this show does need is a good makeover.

    Dump Blades (preferably in the nearest river), and bring in some young female flesh, with no woke credentials, but is easy on the eye, is also a skilled craftswoman, knows her stuff but must wear incredibly alluring clothing – preferably just an apron and a pair of shoes and not much else!

  22. Techno, there is already a fit burd on here that does the upholstery. She has big chesticles.

  23. Come, come lads,
    You’re talking about Jay Blades MBE – awarded for his services to craft!!!!!!!!!

  24. I want to see a ‘behind the scenes repair shop’ because in the programme they all seem to get on too well.
    It’s not true to life.

    They will show the clock repairer getting a kicking for stealing food from the fridge.

    “Can I leave you with this Will?”
    ‘Go fuck yourself. I have my own shit to do. If you want a slave then I am not Spartacus’

    The 2 teddy bear ladies getting caught having a threesome with the guy who fixes musical instruments, in Dom’s shed.

    The ceramics woman saying ‘Fuck this for a game of soldiers. I’m off down the pub’

  25. It’s the same problem that the majority of TV programmes suffer … the apparent need to put in a ‘character’ front person. BS and banter in order to ‘appeal’ to the masses. They do like to dumb shit down … I want to watch informational/educational programmes for enlightenment not some wankers comedic whimsical view of the subject. Cunts!

  26. I don’t mind the Repair Shop. Give me that over superhero bollocks and woke Netflix wank any day, but i’ve also wondered what Jay is actually doing there, a la Tom Waites..

    ‘What the hell is he BUILDING in there?’

    • One problem I have with this programme 9as with nearly all on at the moment) is the sobbing. I’m sure i’s egged on by sociopathic druggie producer types named Marcus and Pippa.

      Just… dont. Soft wankers.

      • Yes people just keep your hair on. Yes this 1870s chamois strap on (used) belonged to your grandma who died but that happened to them all anyhow. And there’s no Easter bunny. So keep a stiff upper lip.

        As to the presenter, he’s not a great fit as a presenter, just wanders around this workshop annoying and interrupting the experts. And he’s clearly not the owner of the premises, so there’s not even a “reverse race power dynamic in the Dickensonian workhouse” angle to work.

  27. A prime example of what happens when you teach an unflushable turd how to talk. I’ve seen more artistic talent in the mong wing of one of our (sadly closed down) lunatic asylums.

Comments are closed.