I made a mistake. I made a faux pas. A howler in fact. I wrote about casting off the ‘yolk’ of Rome instead of the yoke of Rome. (Not wishing to rub it in, but….. DA https://is-a-cunt.com/2021/04/sola-scriptura/)
I’m sorry. I prostrate myself before you cunters begging forgiveness.
I was corrected by a fellow cunter. It was a hard pill to swallow but I had to it because it was so blatantly obvious.
‘humility is truth’ wrote Saint Theresa of Avila. I certainly have learned about humility in this ‘yolk’ of Rome episode. I got egg on my face.
But you know I believe it has been good for my formation. I embrace my mistake now.
In fact I will add to it. Or own up to other tremendous errors I’ve made. One was, much to Mrs Plastic’s amusement and astonishment, at family gathering I announced ‘not many people know the Nile river is in Africa’. The not unexpected response was ‘er well the Nile river IS in Africa’.
That was one. Another verbal faux pas I made for a long time was the pronunciation of the word ‘sedentary’. I got it from ‘this sedentary trade’ from a Yeats poem-a poem about being a poet. Anyway I pronounced it seDENTary. The stress on the second syllable instead of the first SEDentary. It was fellow student that took me aside to break the news to me.
What else comes to mind? Oh yes. Now this is the heart of the Nom. I hope I have established that I can admit when I am wrong. Albeit very very reluctantly. But in the end if I am wrong I do admit it. A friend comes to mind. But the anecdote doesn’t. It was some television programme or advert. And the argument between us was were the people on the telly acting or were they just regular people. I wish I could remember what it was. But it was a long time ago.
Anyway the argument went on all evening. It got to the point where we rung up the BBC I think it was. Did we ever find out 100%? No. But there wasn’t just me there. And all the rest if us agreed they weren’t actors. But he wouldn’t have it, he wouldn’t have it.
He was one for correcting you. Oh, that was a wonderfully ecstatic moment when he got the author and the title of the book mixed up. In front if everyone ‘Jane Eyre is the title of the book you daft fuck not the author. For fucks sake’. Very satisfying moment. I got my own back.
Anyway, I’ve been honest with you cunters now you’ve got to be honest with me. In the spirit of humility I talked of earlier can any of you own up to getting a pronunciation, a spelling, a grammar point, something embarrassing, I don’t know maybe a book title maybe a song lyric just getting something embarrassingly catastrophically wrong.
It take a real cunter to own up that they can make mistakes.
I am particularly looking forward to the cunter that corrected me contributing. I cannot name him because it might’ve against the rules. All I will say is that his username is specific model of lawnmower.(Regrettably – or not – he has cut his final IsaC lawn – DA)
Nominated by: Miles Plastic
When I was 9 I called my friend a dildo in front of his mum. I didn’t know what it meant. She told me off.
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I had a fiver on Derek getting off 😂
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CS binned again? Damn, I missed his newest meltdown, they were the only posts he made worth reading.
He’ll be back…..
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Miles, I am convinced you are bound for paradise. Go in peace.
Good morning, everyone.
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If the critic was that tedious, tiresome, pretentious self congratulating cunt that appears under different names you have done us all a favour.
Although, wasnt he a mate of RTCs?
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That is an outrageous slur, you upstart you!
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No,no…..I’m still here.
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Just checked the link. It was that Ajax wanker and he was in dialogue with RTC.
Nothing outrageous about my slur.
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You disappoint me Cuntstable.
Being in dialogue does not mean we were mates. You clearly haven’t read the multiple threads with me and CS at each other’s throats.
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CS. That’s your mate, that is.
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Upstart!
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Must of the mistake I e mad on thistle forums have been due to predictive tex. Fudge offer.
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Dont worry about fucking up Miles i do it all the time and i think i have been corrected by your good self, i blame the perfect storm of Dyslexia, fucking spell checker, not wearing my glasses and the copious amount of booze i drink and on top of that im lazy as fuck.
So thank you fellow cunters for enduring my mistakes, and just so as you know this will not be remedied any time soon, feel free to correct me if required as any constructive criticism will usually be ignored unless its funny in which case i love it.
Good morning everyone lets hope its not a cunt of a day, but iots early yet
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I accidentally said to someone that Windows Vista was a good operating system, and worth installing!
I have whipped myself daily ever since!
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Must have either been somebody fucking gullible or somebody who’d never heard of Windows.
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I was juggling 2x girls in my early twenties-they lived 300 miles apart, so it should have been easy. Except I made the mistake of calling one of them by the others name, just as I was on the vinegar strokes-she went fucking rigid, then into a meltdown.
She was an absolute stunner too. Seriously great looking girl.
I got away with it that time but learned a valuable lesson; from that day forward, call them all the same pet name😉
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What, like Rover?
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Well, it won’t be fucking “Moggie”-although 63 could work: anything less than that number annually, in my wrenching days, would be disappointing 😉
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@Miles:
Are you Opus Dei or something? Stop the self flagellation-we are all imperfect cunts here.👍
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During my early days working on the IT helpdesk for a company I worked for over 20 years, I had to go round departments fixing PCs.
Rather than taking the PC away from the user and fixing it at my desk, I would first crawl under the desk and check the cabling, just to make sure everything was plugged in etc. It was a grim and dirty job at times but because I was the IT Junior, I ended up doing it more than my senior colleagues.
However, I loved helping out in the credit control department because that’s where most of the young women worked. And more often than not I would spend far too long rummaging under their desks pretending to check cables while I oggled up their skirts!
This went on for quite a few months, until on one occasion I went under a nest of desks to check cables while ogling, only to be welcomed by a wet fart as some bint crossed her legs. Not quite sure what the fuck she had eaten the night before, but OMG it almost knocked me unconscious!
When I crawled from under the desks – for fresh air more than anything – I noticed it was some old bat who had done the dirty deed as she was looking at me rather uncomfortably!
That put me off my under-the-table-upskirting for quite awhile!
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Ha ha ha😂
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Serves you right you dirty bastard haha. You’re lucky one of them didn’t use one of those little desk fans to blow a bit of extra cheese off the taco in your general direction.
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Your gaffs are endearing Miles. They make you what you are!
We can expect these. After all, you used to work in Education!
😂
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I used to stop in a small village and send a simple lad who was doing some tree-planting for me into the little shop that was run by a pair of elderly spinsters…he was to ask them for a quarter of ” Clitoris Allsorts”. They would tell him that they had never heard of such things and send him back to the minibus….being me,I couldn’t let my hilarious jape rest and kept on sending him while the rest of waited in the bus. Eventually one of the ancient Old Dears wobbled her way down the path and,without once swearing or even raising her voice, made me feel about 2 inches tall in front of all the lads…I was a nasty,cruel man who took pleasure in other’s discomfort and unhappiness….Couldn’t argue with her..she had me bang-to rights….and even I couldn’t bring myself to tell this “lovely Grandma” type to Fuck Off.
I still blush when remembering how that Old Trout embarrassed me over my innocent mispronunciation of the word “Liquorice”.
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Good job you didn’t get him to ask for a long-black-Dong 😂
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👍 Nice one Dick. 😊
As a teacher, I’ve never laughed so much at a kid as I did at one school where I had a teaching practice. In the days before uniforms, this lad, obviously a keen biking enthusiast was wearing a leather jacket. On the back he had painted . . . ..
“HELLS ANGLES”
Mind you, he never looked like any sort of angel!
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Perhaps he was into “Heavy trigonometry”?
👍
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Dog bless you, Miles. 🙂
For me, honesty is the best policy.
I’ve made mistakes but I had owned up to them afterwards.
One instance in particular I had offered to help Dolly make cakes. I put salt in the mixture instead of sugar by mistake. I didn’t realise until after we started eating them.
She thought she must have had a daft moment and did it herself but I told her it was me.
Luckily all was forgiven and I learnt my lesson to be more careful next time. Salt and sugar look very similar.
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Be careful if you do any baking for B&W Cunt, Spoons.
He has bags of white powder that most definitely are NOT icing sugar 😉
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Morning Spoons. I’ll bet Dolly makes a mean ‘hash brown.’
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If in doubt, Spoonington, dip a little finger in & do a taste test.
I do not, however, recommend this action when confronted with dark brown substances.
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I still claim victory in Dead Pool #212.
The European Super League is dead
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There’s always a wordsmith about when you don’t want one.
I was on tenderhooks’.
It was heartrendering .
Can you be more Pacific?
Aitch or Haitch that’s always an issue.
I used to work with a bloke who would use a few everyday.
He didn’t like Alation dogs, revolting doors and his wife worked in the pharmacootical department.
He was a steady sauce of entertainment.
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A favourite of mine was from a neighbour, not University educated, who talked about how much he hated ” preverts ”
I never corrected him because it was a joy to watch him become more and more irate, and by consequence more and more incoherent.
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I love being wrong, because being an insufferable pessimist, every time I’m wrong, the world is a better place.
I wish I was wrong more often. I also wish the anti vax wankers would adopt such a policy, as it seems they are more than happy for people who’ve had one to die or become seriously ill just to prove their point. Or, just fuck up for ten minutes with your fucking whining. I know a couple of them, and fuck me, they never stop, and it’s not like I’m wishing they get it to prove them wrong although I’m coming around to that idea.
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Miles, such wee errors are charming, no need to prostrate yourself and ask for forgiveness. I thought it was funny, especially the reply which was ‘No its yoke, you dummy’.
As therapy, imagine yourself as Russell Brand and think of all the bad things he’s done. Now, don’t you feel better about yourself?
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Yes that worked Cuntologist. I feel better now.
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Despite what CS/Ajax attempted to ‘steamroller’ me into admitting, I was not wrong with my post that stated ‘errant shite’. Errant being ‘wayward’, wayward being the theme of the cunting, i.e. the film industry in Hollywoke losing its way and disappearing up its own woke arsehole. It wasn’t ‘arrant shite’. If it were ‘arrant shite’ then I would have said so in the first place.
I will admit when I am wrong about anything. On this occasion, the simple fact I wasn’t wrong. His embarrassment at correcting someone to find that his correction was in error was clearly too bitter a pill for him to swallow and made him look a complete fucking arse.
Nevermind, I’m sure he will be back in some other form, enthralling us with his pomposity, verbosity and Ladybird Book of Latin in equal measures.
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As you know, errant means wayward in a modern dictionary and the way you used it is completely in line with the meaning in the Urban Dictionary.
Who says arrant anymore? Unless you are into the 14th century, perform Hamlet, or are a cunt politician who might pompously say ‘arrant nonsense’ when ‘utter nonsense’ would do.
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It was both, PM, wayward and utter.
Rest easy.
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Team Paul lol
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Who the fuck cares. The English language is an over complicated cunt, and we’re not submitting essays on a literature course at Cambridge.
If I can understand what you meant to say then you succeeded.
I hate grammar nazis and language purists. This isn’t a classroom or a test. Lets discuss what the person was talking about, not the fucking symbols and syntax ffs.
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Totally agree,Chunky.
Most of us are here for a bit of entertainment and moaning..not to get our knuckles wrapped for a misplaced comma. Most of the people who resort to such nitpicking usually have very little to offer apart from some odd desire to score points by trying to appear clever.
Having said that, ” Yokegate” did make me laugh. I don’t mind C.S..I suspect that even from the dizzying heights of his pomposity he sometimes has a chuckle at his own sheer Gobshitedness.
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They used to call the tory David Willets ‘2 brains’. When CS/,Ajax returns he ought to change his username to ‘3 Brains’.
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Couldn’t agree more Chunky. What does it matter? Lecturing someone because they get a word or a definition wrong is what primary school teachers do to kids. I used to go out with a bird and she couldn’t pronounce certain words like nuclear properly. It was some sort of speech problem. Some cunts took the piss out of her, but I never did. Apart from that, she was great and people who ‘corrected’ her were childish and pedantic cunts.
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Yes, Yes Norman. More important, did she have nice tits,
🤔👍
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She was a cracker, CG. She was called April and she looked like Kate Bush.
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😍
Like a nice bit of bush-Kare was a stunner👍
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I agree, Chunky.
If you can make yourself understood, if people know what you mean/want who the fuck cares.
Some cunt called Ajax, amongst others, apparently.
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You have to understand that Ajax is omnipotent.
He has been visiting this site for years and is a very intelligent barista.
Ultimately, he ends up being barred from the site but returns, resurrected under a new user name.
I suspect that he is already present on the site under new names, waiting to burst forth on the scene in his own inimitable style.
Please have sympathy for him and try to appreciate that his utterances are a cry for help.
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I will concede and apologise to close family.
Everyone else is compelled to Fuck Off.
Now I must clean the oven..
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One day I was standing alone at the bus stop when this bloke came along and asked me if I was waiting for a bus. I could tell by his face that he was educationally subnormal, or whatever the term is, you know when you see them. I humoured him and said yes I was waiting for a bus. He said well there aren’t any buses today because it’s a bank holiday. I’d completely forgotten about that and realized I’d been wasting my time standing there. I thanked him for telling me and started to walk away when he began to criticize me and insult me for being so stupid. I nearly told him to get fucked but I didn’t say anything. All his life he must have had people calling him names for being different, and treating him like dirt, and he was relishing the opportunity to dish it out to someone else. . I felt embarrassed and annoyed at the same time.
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Haha. Great story, bettered only by a bus going past.
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Likely, he had been hanging around bus stops every bank holiday hoping to catch someone out. Cunt.
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That story was great (no sarcasm). I felt like I just watched Twilight Zone or something 🙂 Honestly, if you have a bunch of those, write them up into one collection and publish as an e-book on Amazon as ‘Alan’s Urban Anthology’. Superb,
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Luckily I get everything write, all the time!
I’m good like that! 😀👍
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My suspicions are confirmed then.
Our resident know-all has been given the heave-ho. Thought so due to him not posting in a while.
@Miles
We all make mistakes. It’s what makes us human.
I’ve probably made hundreds of them in my life.
Fortunately none of them have had catastrophic consequences.
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