Chromebooks

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Chromebooks. Chromebooks are cunts.

Microshaft shafted Apple back in the the 80s and 90s.

Why can’t Google do the same thing by shafting Microshaft. Just make your keyboards and key strokes (Ctrl C and Ctrl V) the fucking same, you cunts.

You’re genii. Why can you not do this simple thing? I’m pretty sure (i am pissed, hence the lower case i) that this is not a trade mark issue.

Cuhnts (the drinks kicking in(.

Nominated by: Dark key cunt 

20 thoughts on “Chromebooks”

  2. My son has a Chromebook and he tells me that they are shit, and as he has been playing around with computers since 1979, when we bought him a Commodore PET, I am quite prepared to believe him.

    The problem with computers is that you are stuck with three meglamaniac cunts Apple, Microsoft or Google. But look at the three cunts who started them Bill “If I Ruled The World” Gates, Steve “Up His Own Arse” Jobs and whoever the motherfucker is who runs Google. Bring back Sir Clive Sinclair.

  3. I’ve got a Chromebook and for someone like me who isn’t too “up” on computers it’s grand. I just need to be able to access porn,the Racing Post,”…isaCunt” and The Guardian,of course.

    • I also enjoy writing outraged e-mails to my local M.P…..the Cunt.

      • @Mike….My vast land-holdings span many constituencies but the lucky one that I pester the most is Guy Opperman.

        I’ve still never recovered from meeting a previous M.P called Alan Amos…he even introduced his delightful fiancee to me and I shook his and her hands…..imagine my shock,outrage and fears for my health when I read in the paper that he had been caught on Hampstead Heath…in an area that rejoiced in the name of ” Gobbler’s Gulch” no less… enjoying the attentions of a well-hung Sooty.

  4. Don’t worry cunters, the nano-bots in the second dose of your vaccine still operate in Windows 98-so by pressing F11 and holding down the spacebar, you will have a shit, alt, return and the “W” key, a wank and alt, F1 “C”, to retract Brexit.

    Wibble….

    🤔

    • Mr. Fiddler. That Amos duckie sounds a queer fish: first he was Conservative, then Labour, then Independent then Conservative again. He sounds a mixed up old chap, as well as a player of th pink (and black) oboe:

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alan_Amos

      There is also a “Guardian” interview from 2000 when he was in Labour mode and grovelling to Anthony Blair, which is headed “I’ve Changed” (to which he should have added -“frequently”)

  5. Computers are a mixed blessing, aren’t they? On the one hand who could have dreamt 40 years ago that they would become such useful, comparatively cheap objects that we can’t now live without. I’m practically married to my iPad and MacBook. On the other hand, they bring us computer viruses, ID theft and enable us to observe the many, many cunts in the world in close up detail via Twatter, Cuntbook, etc. Before computers we were less aware of these cunts. Now we get them close up and personal.

    On the whole computers are cunts.

  6. Chromebooks are no worse than Microsoft’s Surface Pro, and I’ve handled a number of CBs over the last 10 years or so.

    They’re relatively cheap, and are not cluttered with too many local apps. Instead it’s primarily for people on the move, and just want to browse the web, check emails and access their stuff from Google Cloud rather than local storage.

    Interesting enough the OS is called Chrome OS, but is hosted on a Linux platform and mostly runs Android apps, and is also compatible with some Microsoft Office products.

    For the price they’re a nice compromise between speed, performance and usability. They piss all over Surface Pros, but are far behind iPads – but then you get what you pay for I suppose. And I must say stripping down the innards of a CB is a piece of piss compared to that of Surface Pros and iPad.

    They’re good for what they are: Cloud/Web based activity rather than resource-heavy local app use.

  9. Remember to scroll down you need to tell the chrome bool by doing the V shape with your fingers and telling it to fuck off. In slow motion like a crack whore sliding on to your member. Then afterwards, chuck it out the window and shout victory. Pieces of shite!

  11. Press Control Alt and Delete together then lob the thing in front of the nearest freight train.

  12. Chromebook worked just fine for granddaughter to do her homeschooling, and daily meet and greet with teach.

    Ok, I can’t use it to design and build a Death Star.

    Who the fuck cares?

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