Not content with bowling less able bodied persons over into the gutter in their quest for total pavement Blitzkrieg we now have next generation scooters equipped to enable shit weasels to turn the nice quiet road to the shops into a murderous modern chavvy Circus Maximus..
When will be safe?
Oven.
Nominated by : Unkle Terry
50mph spastic chariots?!
I know Leek very well, this isnt the kind of highjinxs you associate with it.
Its full of antique shops, ducky darlings.
Bet it belongs to that all round awful cunt Dickinson?
7
Mobility scooters are for dole malingerers.
You see one unattended,
Slash their tyres.
8
Scamborghinis,Mis.
11
Pavement Porsche.
Fraud Fiesta.
10
Test
2
Not HIV again Thomas?
5
If you’re going to modify a spaz chariot, do it properly, like this chap:
https://share.google/G6dGNNe1YlC2Senhs
Safe pic.
5
Imagine how much tax money a year goes on the scooters for obęse pieces of shıt?
Presumably less than EV’s on motability, but still.
Yet another group of parasites dangling off the taxpayer’s tits, along with the innumerable others.
I just love getting up at 6am, battling traffic and dealing with simpletons all day so that my preposterous tax burden can fund lazy cụnts to get free stuff, doubtless all working men feel the same.
Roll on the collapse of the country and an end to the welfare state, hopefully resulting in the deaths of hundreds of thousands of spọngers.
13
Theres a big sweaty dollop of shite rides one of these while walking his chihuahuas near me.
I despise him.
His ailment is terminal fuckin laziness.
No shame.
Id rather drag my arse along the ground than use a mobility scooter.
13
What sort of a man gets a chihuahua?
A cunt, that’s who.
You want a tiny woofer?
Get a Yorkshire Terrier, a proper English dog, not a wetback little rat of a thing with bulgy eyes and a bad attitude.
Morning MNC/all.
12
@thomas….ay caramba 🇲🇽 🪇
only fit for a chihu con carne with a side serving of cartel sauce
3
Morning Thomas.
They tend to be nasty little bastards chihuahuas dont they?
And shaking all the time.
Like Michael J Fox.
Not for me,
I like large dogs,
Something to protect the home,
And scare the ethnics.
8
Michael J. Fox probably needs a scooter himself, the poor Parkinson’s-riddled bugger.
Actually, that reminds me of something I saw online:
“I’d trust you about as much as I’d trust Michael J. Fox to transport a wedding cake”!
8
I can’t remember seeing anyone on a mobility scooter who actually needed one.
They are used by fat, lazy cunts.
There will be plenty around in the summer.
We have companies that rent them out.
By law they should only be rented to people over 65, or to people who have a recognised medical need and are able to prove it.
They have to be insured for third party injuries for €60.000.
But the police really can’t be bothered to check.
Lazy cunts turn up at bars here. They will park their spaccer chariot outside and walk into the places completely unaided.
The really bone idle fuckers will use any ramp that is available to get their scooters onto the terraces.
This means that waiters have to move tables and chairs around to accommodate them.
I have seen families who are eating, having their tables and chairs lifted by the bar staff to make room for these cunts.
But although every knows that these scooters are almost always unnecessary, people still get out of the way when one approaches them.
Why?
Even if the bastard using a scooter is a genuine spaz, they have no right for a delay free journey.
Why should I walk any quicker or get out of the way?
Good morning.
7
Morning TAC…here’s a clip to gladden your heart:
https://youtube.com/shorts/zYsJbgpTgsA?si=v4et2cNTKLp5-YEn
5
That’ll sting in the morning eh Thomas. The electric self propelled wheel chairs do not have the stability of the dole chariots. Rider should have known that. You need some one at the back when attempting that sort of gradient. Am contemplating purchasing secondhand of course and fitting a racing kart engine to the chariot. Sure it’s been done before but keeps me out of trouble which means my siblings can relax.
1
There used to be one in stockport few year ago and he had flags on the back of his mobility scooter,
Hed be at the front of a queue of traffic with a big grin on his face.
Bet hes dead now,
Through road rage.
The mad cunt.
6
There’s a special place in hell for anyone who laughs at this magnificent 10 second clip:
https://youtu.be/3hQalPR_fJw?si=YQPoSKLcbm14IIQ1
7
Good one Thomas.
The commercial shopping centres can be busy.
Once, having parked the car opposite I was walking over a zebra crossing with many other people.
The cars had stopped as they should do.
Some old woman on a push bike came through the line of waiting cars and just kept going.
She was riding at just above walking speed and the pedestrians had to stop mid crossing so they wouldn’t get hit by her.
“Cunt! You are supposed to stop” said one guy, but she just kept going.
Probably foreign and unable to understand the language.
Then fuck me, her husband appears several meters behind her, on a bike with no intention of stopping either.
The guy who did the shouting let the cunt get in front of him, grabbed the handlebars of the bike and shoved the old fucker off.
There he was, lying on the road when the guy chucked his bike on top of him.
That livened up a boring shopping trip for me.
10
At 50mph they’d make a right good dodgem car.
Especially if driven at the wógs the ethnic food aisle in Asda.
I think I’ll get one.
4
I don’t think that people have any pride nowadays.
And that’s people of all ages.
When I was a child I wouldn’t have been seen dead on a scooter.
Scooters were used by very small children on their garden paths.
Now you have grown men getting around town on them.
Pushbikes were only used if you were too young to drive.
And even then, you wouldn’t go anywhere that you may be seen by people you know.
What is it about British parents and pushchairs?
Huge kids who have been running riot around restaurants are put into these things for the journey back to the hotel.
Some of these kids must be 10 year’s old and can just about fit into a pushchair.
I can’t think of a reason why a parent would want to use one for a grown up child.
And the kids themselves must be fucking stupid for sitting in them.
Then there are the cunts that walk around with NHS aluminium crutches.
I feel a new nomination coming on for those bastards.
6
That’s nowt.
Returning from a countryside ramble yesterday I saw a woman pushing two King Charles spaniels along in a pram.
Quite remarkable.
5
Seen the same often UT.
Some dogs are old and can’t get around like they once could.
They still need some fresh air and more importantly, somewhere to shit.
They get taken to the parks or beach, lifted out of their prams and allowed to do what they have to do.
I don’t have any problem with that.
But just like mobility scooters, I am sure that the prams for dogs are not always used as they should be.
5
Modern kids are retards.
They have mam or dad take them to school.
At 8yrs onwards id of died of shame,
Or beaten to death by the other kids if my mummy took me to school.
A rare punishment thatd be.
Titled with that most damning of epitaph
MUMMYS BOY.
Like a little prince Andrew or something.
Modern kids breastfeed till theyre about 14.
6
Different times Mis. My first day at school in 1956, almost five, my mother took me to show me the way. After that I always walked the half-mile there and back alone until I walked with my younger brother two years later. Years later our kids were always taken to and from school by car. Had we suggested they walk there would have been bloody insurrection in the home. Sometimes when the elder was in the sixth form and her mother didn’t need the car she would drive herself to school. She would park the Mondeo beside the teacher’s Renault 5s and Nissan Micras. That amused me.
Trouble is now that living close to a school is a nightmare. Twice a day, five days a week, the streets are jammed with badly parked SUVs.
5
Nail on the head Arty, couldn’t agree more. Never had a fucking scooter. Personal mobility by means of a push-bike from before I started school. Sixteenth birthday, bike in the skip, got one with an engine on. This was of course in the good old days when you could ride a 250 with L-plates, no CBT or any of that crap. Seventeen started learning in a car. Many young men these days are such milk-sops, try to discuss handling of a vehicle they look baffled and glaze over. I’m proud to say our daughters have much more idea. Jeremy Clarkson had it right;
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sw9vDXdyMo8&pp=ygUZZ2V0IGEgY2FyIGplcmVteSBjbGFya3Nvbg%3D%3D
5
There used to be a very round gent down the road from me had a scooter,it even had some sort of plastic cover that kept him dry in the rain if he was minded to go for a newspaper on it.
Strangely I’d often see him gardening sans scooter.
Anyway he’s dead now and some other cunt will have the scooter no doubt.
Dear me.
4
Lazy bastards
4
Fat, stupid, lazy cunts in spacca chariots on fire.
3
Agreed
0
Never see a guide dog take a shit do you?
Wonder why?
Just dogs at the end of the day,
Needs must, like.
And are the blind legally entitled to pick up their dogshit or got a exemption?
Be hard to bag it up then put it in a mailbox thinking its a public bin.
5
Hey Mis, was the header picture taken of a fledgling Miserable Removals before you got your license?
3
Dogs are amazing MNC.
With the correct training they can shit only in selected areas, often waiting for the owner’s command.
They can quickly be taught not to shit in your house and they will relate that to anyone else’s house or any shop or business premises that they may be in.
They are intelligent.
They can also be trained not to shit in the streets, but most owners don’t go so far in the training.
So they use plastic bags for the shit.
The owners of guide dogs know the suitable places that they can take them and the dogs are that clever they will find a discreet place in that area.
4
When I get another dog, I’m going to teach it to shit in the front garden of any house with a ‘vote Green/Lib Dem/Labour’ placard.
8
Morning Artie,
Well i never.
My dog sometimes gets a jippy tummy an squirts out a sloppy shit,
Surely guide dogs must have the odd accident?
If i saw one drop its guts in a public place id instantly offer to pick it up for the blind fucker.
Im very civic minded
And a good citizen.
Hed be very grateful to me,
Hopefully realising id put the bag of shite in the hood of his coat.
2
Brother in law got a rescue dog, it would only shit in long grass.
Clearly been trained this way so the original owner wouldn’t have to pick it up.
The fucking thing used to go crazy if you couldn’t get it to the field quick sticks..💩
2
Ive always been deeply suspicious of the disabled.
Obviously some are genuine but most are scammers and attention seeking.
Theres warning signs.
In a wheelchair but wearing expensive running shoes.. Why?
Blind cunts with HD tellys.
Deafndumbers with karaoke machines
Everyone wants a blue badge.
The DHSS should investigate them more thoroughly.
In the waiting room have a table tennis table.
If they play ping pong they arent blind.
Maybe a trampoline too.
If the claimant is doing forward rolls then chances are hes not got
Fibromyalgia.
4
Being ridiculously obese is a disease…. of the morality of the person in question.
Nothing but a lack of self control, leading to lack of self respect, leading to self pity, leading to more over-eating.
It’s my glands, they say. Pfft.
No fatties in Belsen.
I have a limit of 13 stone. Once over that I heavily restrict my eating until I’m 12 stone. Takes 3 weeks to drop a stone without too much effort. Its really not difficult, once the engine is out of fuel it switches to the reserve tank.
Fat people are just revolting.
5
LOL
1
13 stone?
Fuckin ell!!!
Karen carpenter was 14stone.
And Arnold from Different Strokes was 15 stone.
2
Mis,
Marvin Hagler, Thomas Hearns, Nigel Benn etc
I rest my case 🙂
1
😂
https://youtube.com/shorts/K4gva_utM0Y?si=9AreHFhentQQjb7l
6
Ho ho, nice one, DS!
Shame that guy didn’t trip over the kerb and land on top of the old witch.
8
I got one a while back.
Sick of the rising price of fuel, road tax and insurance.
Welded a tow hitch on it for a trailer and secured an old armchair with bungee straps, for Ethel to sit in, Granny Clampett style 😃
It’s ace.
Cheap as chips.
Good morning 👍
11
Even use it when going on holiday….
https://www.facebook.com/trelawnydmvc/videos/only-in-rhyl-mobility-scooter-spotted-towing-along-caravan/1007114830766420/
Only took three days to get there.
11
The same cunts that use mobility scooters probably have stair lifts fitted in their homes.
Not to go up and down stairs, they can do that unaided.
They will have one next to their armchair in front of the television, taking them to the fridge and back.
11
Ive taken loads of those stairlifts out of places.
Weighed em in.
Theyre a fuckin nuisance.
Block the whole staircase off.
If your too lazy to walk up an down stairs,
Its cheaper to install a block and tackle to get yourself up,
An a teatray to get down.
11
Yes they will Mr Cunter.
I don’t need one I have a wife.
I am a scoundrel.
Your health sir.
12
It makes a change from criticising the cyclist’s, now that the unlicensed fat bastard Boudica chariot’s are now causing havoc on our pavements. Their favourite stunt is to bring down people up ladders repairing property in the now called modern day hit and run. They’ll be having rotating knives on the wheels next. I think there’s two types of these lethal contraptions, one for the road and the other pavement. Either way they’ve no need to pass a test, so long as they are obese fat bastards.
5
In case it hasn’t already happened, there’ll be hordes of ladies in these contraptions travelling four abreast, with Wagner’s “Ride of the Valkyries” blasting out along our high streets very soon.
2
When I worked for a recovery company many years ago, we were called out to collect a spacca chariot that had strayed onto the M4 in the evening rush hour.
Much merriment ensued upon arrival, where we saw a very confused old lady in a police car and coppers trying to keep a straight face.
Needless to say, we put on a bit of a show by winching it onto our 11 tonne flat bed.
Then, a while later we obtained another from somewhere.
Rigged it up with four 12 volt batteries and it went like stink.
Until the motor caught fire.
11
The bikes that you sort of lay down on with your feet pedaling in front of you.
We have a cunt here with one who has gone up a level by building a body for it.
It now looks like a Thunderbirds rocket going along the road.
There is no way that he has any peripheral vision.
The police don’t stop him.
I think that they are just waiting for him to hopefully kill himself.
Another wanker goes around on roller blades using ski poles.
Backwards and forwards past the bar all night in the summer.
I don’t know if you have the electric skate boards in the UK that only have one wheel.
You stand on them with one foot either side of the central wheel and off you go.
The roads are busy and dangerous, especially in the summer.
These people are trying to kill themselves.
I hope that they succeed.
11
Monty Python were looking to the future, with their “Hell’s Grannies” sketch.
1
Increasingly, as we head further and further into the dustbin of history, I ask myself:
What would Hitler have done?
I’ll have to dust off one of my copies of Mein Kampf and see if the subject of fat slob scooter scum is covered.
7
I think they’d have fallen under the remit of the Aktion T4 program, TCI.
If we had the same kind of approach ourselves, you’d see spurious mental elf and disability claims withdrawn overnight.
7
It would certainly focus minds, FMC.
Then the fat lazy pigs can be made to pay every last penny back through hard, slave labour. For however many years are required.
Failing that, they can be transformed into bars of soap. Even the outlandish idea of lamp shades has been suggested, although I’m sure we can make do with the usual materials for those.
We must all do our bit towards the long awaited cause of national and spiritual renewal.
7
share.google/w5Rss6UZ46gbSdEd1
Daft fucker
6
And they laughed at the Sinclair C5.
2
Unsurprisingly the modern mobility scooter was invented by an American. Allan R. Theime came up with the idea for a family member who had multiple sclerosis but I doubt he could have envisaged it being used to transport daibetes-ridden land whales between the aisles of Walmart and Blightys army of benefit scroungers menacing high streets up and down the country.
6
Wonder if JP has one, retrofitted with an air horn?
5
As a matter of fact, LL, I have been out today with Younger to purchase one, for reasons I won’t go into I am struggling to walk even relatively short distances.
I’m going to get the Berserker to modify it.
Top speed 4mph, pppft! That won’t do. Retractable scythes on the front wheels, essential for getting round the aisles in Morries unimpeded.
The horn is laughable, I need something like a trawlers foghorn, preferably with a choice of alerts from a stroke-inducing high pitched shriek to a loud Brian Blessed style voice shouting things like “shift!”.
Suggestions for other modifications welcome.
BTW, my chu doesn’t have a nasty bone in his body, they get some bad press, do chus.
0
Whenever I see one of these massively fat cunts spilling their blubber over the sides of their tiny scooter, I get the irresistible urge to tip the cunts over.
3