Apparently Princess Spakly’s new product is not thick enough to qualify as actual jam, so it is labelled as spread. In an interview on an episode of her universally acclaimed TV series, she explained:
“Technically, it can’t be called jam because jam is equal parts sugar and fruit. I just don’t think you can taste the fruit that way.”
The runny stuff flew off the virtual shelves the moment it went on sale at around a tenner a jar. Gastronomes are united in their view that sultry Meghan (former star of the hit US TV show “Shits”) is a genius who has single-handedly saved us from that stuff sold by the racist Wollygogs.
Read all about how wonderful it is right here:
Buy some you cunts, or the Ginger Prince gets it.
PS Why not try some on your Chiggun?
Nominated by : Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea
I will stick my neck out here and prepare myself for some abuse.
Fucking good luck to her!
She is the working wife of a scrounging ex prince who is totally useless at anything.
She is prepared, able and willing to put food on her table.
Harry isn’t.
There are plenty of things unlikeable about the woman but her determination to earn money can’t be cunted.
Good morning.
9
Why can’t she just go on Onlyfans like any normal scrubber.
Or do pọrn. One could imagine her getting freaky with half a dozen Robertson’s whilst the ginger git sits miserably in the cuck chair.
Morning TAC/all.
13
I wonder how much ‘us time’ she’s rationed him to now.
One 5 minute session a month perhaps.
Then IF she reaches climax she calls out the name of her half-brother.
Morning TtCE/all.
5
I agree, AC.
Firstly, if some vacuous airhead or bottom-plunderer wants to pay money for this diarrhoea, then jolly good look to her.
Secondly, don`t the Yanks call jam “jelly”? – Hardly the wobbly cubes of concentrated squidginess I grew up with.
So it`s “neither nowt nor summat”, as they say in Kensington.
🫙
1
Can’t fault your argument there Arty. As you say, if she’s smart enough to sell it and folks are daft enough to buy it fucking good luck to her.
1
I imagine it has the same consistency, as the anal discharge from the ginger cunts, overpegged arsehole.
Suckers will pay anything for a celebrity product, but at least cool hand lukes salad dressing money went to charity.
She should donate the profits into a study into why white gingers convert to Islam.
5
“Kick out the jams motherfuckers!!!”
-MC5
But they were yanks,
So probably prefer peanut butter.
We have jams.
Theyre labelled ‘conserve’
But its fuckin jam.
Black cherry, raspberry, strawberry.
You need sugar in it or its not jam.
I wouldn’t eat Megs jam.
The thought her mum may of licked the spoon makes me positively sick.
Shes made a few quid hawking this shite.
Jammy cunt.
3
Following closely on from the harrowing news about marmalade this story has completely knocked me for six.
I also do not care for “celebrity chefs”,as apart from Keith Floyd,who I understand is dead anyway,they are all total cunts.
Good morning.
3
Fucking vermin.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0e53x475qjo
3
I’ve just read. It seems we have to rename it because some Kraut politician was “confused”. The motherfucker is clearly too stupid to be a public servant.
0
What about Jamie Olivers delicious blackberry and gozz breakfast jam?
Or his low sugar strawberry and spittle?
4
@ut….yep the best thing about marmalade was they had a Robertson’s on there drum kit…great seeing it bashed about during a tune 😆
2
I can imagine her brother-in-law and his skinny, baby shitting wife sitting in one of his castles, provided like everything else in his life by the tax payer.
They will be laughing because Harry is married to a jam salesperson.
William will be praying for the day that his simpleton father croaks it so that he can take over the job that he is equally unqualified for, and start trousering even more cash for doing fuck all.
His wife only has to look presentable for the rest of her useless life, which isn’t that difficult when she has an unlimited budget.
3
Megs jam should have a picture of her mam on the lid for retro nostalgia.
Maybe do a limited edition Fentanyl an chiggun jam
All proceeds to BLM.
5
Apparently, Meghan wanted her image on the label as a kind of homage to the old Robertsons Jars, until someone in marketing pointed out that she wasn’t black enough.
She wanted Gary Linekunt as a potential replacement, but Walkers were having none of it.
They claim they have exclusive rights to the second most famous black promoter of foodstuffs after Uncle Ben.
6
Migraine can shove her “conserve” up her rear hole.Empty headed wench.
4
By way of a service to fellow cunters I have done some background reading on this controversy. As a result, my advice to Sparkly is to leave stuff a bit like jam to the experts. The marvelous Martha Stewart really knows what she is talking about when it comes to the sticky stuff. Check this out:
https://www.marthastewart.com/how-to-make-jam-8704189
You will see from this that The Netflix Princess made a basic error in jumping straight in with raspberries. Start with peaches, then plums and so on. It is all so obvious innit. If only Meggie could read. We could have avoided all this trauma.
Good morning everyone.
2
I think anything promoted by Bob Hope’s daughter wouldn’t sell here regardless of the quality. I’d go even further to say the turned up nosed twat couldn’t even give it away.
2
I think I’m one of the few people on here who hasn’t ever heard her speak, or even a moving image if only subliminally. Nonentities ever appear on my screens, other than on here whenever receiving a thoroughly good cunting.
2
Rusty bollocks has a lot to answer for.
1
It’s the colour of that abominable spread that worries me. It looks the colour of Mandy’s lavatory bowl when his ring piece fell out due to overuse. Either that or the colour of Kweer’s Y Fronts when the piles explode.
2
The mind boggles Mr Boggs 😂
2
Posh packaging and a following of cunts who think she is a Duchess of relevance and she can sell anything, including runny jam.
Strawberry fucking spread ffs.
Thank fuck she isn’t here 😂
1
Haven’t seen advertisements in donkeys years, since the Esso sign one with the darkle. It was mentioned on here they were ridiculous showing black faces living in Mansion Houses, that can’t be true ?
0
This jambo sambo should be more adventurous.
Strawberry and elderflower
Gooseberry,
Medlar (dogs arse fruit)
Ive tried em all.
Which makes me expert.
She should branch into curds.
Lemon curd,
Or as a tribute to her husband
Thick ginger turd, sorry curd.
0
Meghan’s Minge Jelly!!
No thanks. I’d rather have one of Paltrow’s Fanny candles or whatever pudenda product she was pushing.
Still, as Artful Cunter pointed out, she has a useless good for nothing prince to support so she has to earn money somehow.
0
When people try to get above their station, its time for the heavy mob to make their move.
0