Feeding yourself without food waste is a cunt and virtually impossible, if you’re single.
I live alone, have done for over 10 years, and like a lot of older people, my appetite has diminished.
Eating healthy is really hard. What are supposed to be single portions are too much for me.
Ready prep meals for one are so tasteless without a ton of salt and Hendos, they defeat the object!
I try not to waste food, after all I’m a pensioner on a fixed income, but why can’t supermarkets do a reasonably priced bag of veg for one? You know, three baby spuds, florets of cauli, half a peeled carrot?
And don’t give me shite about frozen veg, lettuce doesn’t freeze!
(and has the nutritional value of air – NA)
Nominated by : Jeezum Priest
@JP, I know it won’t help re: salad but you could always par boil your veggies and bung them in the freezer.🤗
6
I do this, Jill.
I also batch cook and freeze portions, but I have limited freezer space.
It’s better for me in Winter, because I make chunky soups and stews, but when it’s hot, options are limited.
5
Christ.
Theres Guinea pigs eat more than you JP.
Youd make a good pet for a kid.
14
Agreed, MNC.
Or perhpas just buy a dog – they will eat until they burst.
🐶🍖💥
4
Put some timber on, and eat for two.
It works for lammy, he is eating for three.
It will eventually be two and three quarters when he loses a foot to diabetes.
13
He could lose his head to diabetes without his IQ falling.
23
What a splendid day that would be.
Good morning.
7
Isn’t there some other way we can get the black pudding to consume more, Barry. I suggest putting subliminal messages into the mind of the cunt, that the rest of the (food) cabinet look delicious to eat.
6
Hell get a peg leg, an inflatable dinghy and call himself Long John Lammy 🏴☠️
2
JP makes a fair point.
Asda is the worst culprit in my experience. The pricing structure encourages customers to buy far too much of everything, particularly junk food.
Which explains the why most of the cunts shopping in there are the size of barrage balloons.
14
@gt…I find Asda round where I live the best supermarket for showing the state of the UK today…spot the whitey 🧐…and Sainsbury’s for employ the whitey…🏴
9
I live in a small provincial town in the East Midlands. Last Wednesday I spotted my first burqua in our local Sainsburys. I have been around a bit but I felt a little intimidated, they really ought to be banned in shops. Personally I would have no hesitation in banning them completely, they are a clear indication of female subjugation. Our backyard, our rules.
Good Morning.
17
Don’t worry,in a knee jerk reaction to the rise of Reform the “one in one out deal” with those French cunts is due to start soon..
So no doubt those shifty looking ragheads will be soon sent packing.
You can trust the Prime Minister.
7
I never use Asda.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohsin_and_Zuber_Issa
6
Its wondering how much hair they have on their fannies that gets to me, Wanksock.
5
Up to their bellies and down to their knees most likely.
2
Muslim women have bits of their fanny cut off and the hole sewn up at an early age anyway. Horrific. Now illegal in UK but certainly still going on. Still legal to cut bits off baby boys I believe. Should also be banned. Another example of two tier justice. Every cult/religion has a problem with sex.
5
Despite being a single man, my food bill was always easily £800 a month.
The guests in my love dungeon were always complaining that there was not enough food in their troughs until I decided to serve up previous visitors in a Ragout.
Now my grocery bills are only a couple of hundred and the local soup kitchen has expressed an interest in serving up portions of my Ragout to hungry tramps.
8
My current abode is a flat,
I have fuck all garden and after the first year of looking at the scrub hedge which seems to double as a litter tray I made a little plan.
A bit like the great escape I clipped away at the hedge over night, hiding the green waste in my bin bags until little stumps appeared where the hedge/ rubbish bin/litter tray once was, and being public spirited they went too.
a total of four window boxes appeared on the side of the house, one is a herb bed, all to high to piss on and an open invite to the neighbours to help themselves, giving them the impression that this is some socialist utopia protects them quite nicely.
the shit made up earth was scraped off and is now a home to sweetcorn French beans and courgette, (look up Mayan growing) bordered with Lettice.
now you don’t have to lift the whole Lettice, just pull leaves as and when keeping an eye on it before it bolts.
Two of the window boxes are tumbling Tom tomatoes, red and yellow, that was a fucking mistake, I will tell you.
Last years tomatoes blighted, so I did double bubble, fuck I have been feeding neighbours, in laws, strangers, there is only so much you can do with a marble sized tomato!
one of the window boxes was strawberry’s, a pretty pointless one off crop, loads of fruit but after a week of strawberry and blueberry with evaporated milk it gets on your tits.
so that’s the veg side almost covered, I don’t bother with spuds they are cheaper to buy than grow.
Meat wise being blessed with a freezer a knife and two hands, I found the Sainsbury crackling joint to be a blessing, buy it, take the skin off it, cut it into schnitzel or cube it for stews, strips for kebabs and take the skin, cut it into strips and season, put it into the air fryer and roast it down, voila! pork scratchings and a load of cooking fat to cook the mass of pork you now have!
So with 2M square of dirt, a freezer and a sharp knife I get by, its sort of my second hobby after wanking.
12
You are jeremy corbyn and I claim my free isis/hamas membership.
9
This would imply that I have had sex with Flabot!
I am deeply insulted😒😒
Even I have standard, remarkably low in some peoples opinions but not that fucking low!
11
It is not often I agree with JC but he is absolutely right in his article in the DT criticising Rayner for selling off allotments for housing. It really is as sad state of affairs.
8
Can’t have peasants growing their own food Mr Wanksock. Next they will be thinking that they are free.
7
All the supermarkets are crap for people on their own with no real selection to accommodate them, with a small tin of beans now requiring a loan 🦈 in attendance 😩…the one thing that gets my 🐐 is that pre washed bags of 🥬 FFS… are we that far from a watering hole 😂
7
I’ve been single long enough to remember what its like not to be. I find it easier to fast, due to being brought up in a poor family straight from the end of the war. I understand it being difficult to live by oneself cost wise, but is worth being able to do what you want from morn till night if you remember to fast for longer, which is the integral part of it.
6
Smashing idea J P. We get to know more about the rest of us on here. Would’ve liked it to be the second item on today’s menu to talk about food rather than eat it.
1
Mrs Cunter has gone on holiday, so I am temporarily single.
Unfortunately I have to eat healthy food so with that in mind I went to the supermarket to buy the ingredients for a ratatouille.
Half of what I brought was enough for 2 good portions.
One to be eaten immediately after cooking and the other one to be put in the fridge for a few days later.
So 4 portions in all.
We have plastic bags for putting fruit and vegetables in, in the supermarkets.
You pick whatever you want off the shelf, shove it in a plastic bag and then weigh it in the electronic scales provided.
The scales will give you a sticky label to put on the plastic bag which the check out people scan.
I brought……. One aubergine, one green pepper, one onion, one garlic bulb, two courgettes, some already packaged vine tomatoes fresh basil and oregano.
Enough for one.
Why can’t UK supermarkets do the same?
It’s a national disgrace.
8
Aaah.rat or twoey.
Didnt know you liked asian food Artie.
5
Also a national disgrace all the BOGOFF items encouraging you to buy more than you need, no wonder the nation is obese.
5
I fell foul on a cathedral cheddar offer, buy one get two free!
of course most people like me did not read the label and grabbed two and were charged for two, what the fuck would I want with 3 blocks of cheddar?
4
The chef put basil in the ratatouille.
He put Basil in the ratatouille…Aaaaaaaghh
Classic Faulty Towers.
6
I still batch cook and freeze.
I recall doing a nice stew in the slow cooker, enough for six people,
well at that time my Girlfriend had two sons, one had fucked off and the other was back from uni, and was nocturnal, spending his nights shouting at a computer with his virtual friends.
Any way big fuck off stew, probably enough to feed a refugee camp, I took two portions from it, me and the then Mrs ate it, I mentioned to the troglodyte that there was food in the kitchen, leaving it out to cool over night to bag up in the morning and freeze.
well morning came and the pot was fucking empty! how the bastard managed to eat so much is beyond me!
single living has its advantages.
Oh and the aerosol squirty cream, me and the then Mrs had plans for that too (non culinary) and the little cunt ate that too!
bastard!
5
Living in Norfolk, there’s a steady supply of spuds, mangelworzels and corn to be half-inched from the fields, and muntjac deer is fair game all year round.
Plus kebab-shops crammed into every town and village of course.
Spot-on nom: being single is expensive, and I realllyyyy hate food waste
3
Food waste is a no-no in our house. Mrs Twenty wont let me get down from the table to watch TV until I have eaten all my vegetables. Always eating my crusts mean I still have curly hair.
Good morning, everyone.
7
The only time I sit down to eat is the on average once a year I’m near a McDonalds – if there’s fuck all cunts inside. (Too many noisy bastards in there when I open the door, and it’s an about turn and ‘maybe next year’).
At home? ..something stuck between bread & down the gullet every second day .. magic. Never ‘feel hungry’. 48 hours without? No probs.72? It happens.
The missus eats what ye call normally, breakfast, lunch, dinner… so the grub is available if I wanted it. I just don’t.
Sin(pronounced ‘shin’) é.
4
p.s. it ain’t a ‘body image’ thing … I just dont like any foods. Think of something you DONT like to eat.
Why would you eat that? You wouldn’t.
Just that, scaled up.
4
I used to say, Cuntemall. Live to Eat. Remembering my long lost loved one, who cooked delicious foods. Now just eat to live and remember her forever.
6
cassoulet, food of the legion, you have to try it! fart like fuck afterwoulds but its so good!
2
Eat plenty of fruit and those occasional meals for one will go through you like the imaginary dose of salts.
I find it much easier than some by not drinking alcohol and owning a car. It’s annoying having to sit in a vehicle after walking to the shops, but its the only way to get the food home. Have it delivered some may ask. What ? And have a load of unwanted shite chosen by some imbecile. I’ve never experienced that ridiculous method and don’t intend to. Have you seen the size of people who do that. I’ve often pondered the thought of going to Iceland, choosing what I fancy and have it delivered free. Might be next on my agenda.
4
Ahh home delivery and the cuntishness of “substitution” where some spotty gitt thinks “you might like to try this” ……..
I bought a Pizza once and was given a fucking coconut with it, I like coconut but questioned as to why I was being gifted it, The owner said, because you will never forget the Pizza now.
Well he was fucking wrong I have forgotten what the pizza was, but I remember where I got it and have never fathomed out why he gave me a fucking coconut with it!
3
I think, Lord benny, the coconut was there after it bounced off the nog-nigs head on a short trip to you.
4
Oh you really shouldn’t, I am still laughing. It sound like a bit of Dadaist installation art. Pure brilliance.
3
If you want to see real food waste then take a drive around one of our urbanisations.
The first thing that people want to do when they come here is to plant citrus and fruit trees.
To them it is a novelty.
One lemon tree will give you a ton of lemons.
What the fuck can anyone do with so many lemons?
You can put them in bags and take them to your local bars, but every cunt does that and although the bars will accept them, they will be chucked out.
Once you have a lemon tree you can’t get rid of the bastard.
They are almost impossible to kill.
Chop it down or even cement over the roots and the cunt keeps coming back.
So all during the year you will see big boxes outside of people’s homes, full of oranges, lemons, grapefruit, cherries, grapes and every other type of fruit that you can imagine.
Take what you want.
It’s all free.
6
same problem at my parents house, 3 plum trees, 2 eating apple trees. 2 cooking apple trees.
Mum put an old galvanised baby bath outside full of apples and a free help yourself sign on it and some cunt nicked the bath!
we had a smelly dog after that.
4
Orange trees are indestructible too.
They line the streets and are always full of fruit.
Even though it hardly ever rains no cunt waters them or looks after them in any way.
2
Like JP, I eat meals that most people would classify as a child’s portions.
Fortunately my wife is a pig and will eat whatever I put in front of her. Consequently we have zero food waste.
Top-Tip: donate any leftovers to starving Palestinian children and get a warm fuzzy feeling inside.
4
Would eat blanched food at one factory I worked. But stopped after finding out that Blanche was drying her knickers in the same oven.
3
Where the fuck has dick fiddler gone?
Lots of the old cunts seem to have disappeared, Dementia? covid? or just given up in despair?
5
I notice miserable is still nocking round, but that’s to be expected people like him are the last to go.
Fucking surprised Dio popped his head up, I thought he was on the way out a couple of years ago, mind you so was I, but after a horrendous operation and a shit load of drugs I keep going.
4
Lord Fiddler departed due to some sort of button.
I think.
4
You’re right Unk. Fiddler took umbrage when the “report abuse” button appeared. A great loss to the site I feel. Another loss was RTC who would bait me on occasion, but it was all in good heart, no offence intended or taken.
3
The jungle cooking pot would last you up to man Friday. Then start again.
3
There is a massive amount of food waste due to customers being cuntish.
Farmers chuck away more than they sell because the produce is not of uniform size or shape.
Customers and therefore supermarkets insist on straight carrots, perfectly formed potatoes, uniform shaped parsnips etc.
This is so the vegetables can be peeled easily.
Here’s a tip…… Don’t fucking peel them.
Most of the goodness is in the skins of these things anyway.
Wash them and cook them.
People want green, shiny apples so in a country where hundreds of apple varieties are grown, the supermarkets import tons of tasteless Granny Smith’s from France.
And why do they kill and burn livestock when there is an outbreak of foot and mouth?
There is absolutely nothing wrong with the meat.
Humans can’t catch foot and mouth, or anything else from an infected animal.
4
Fair play to some supermarkets who have been selling “wonky” fruit and veg. After all, I want to eat the carrot, not duct tape it to a wall and call it art!
Even so, the bags still have far more than I can reasonably eat before it goes off.
I do miss the days when we had a local butcher/greengrocer. At least you could get only what you needed for the meal you were making that day.
3
To be fair, the skins of fruit and veg is where the herbicide and pesticide residue is located. Not good. Always peel ’em.
In other news…humans can catch rabies and AIDS from infected animals. And a form of ‘mad cow’ disease.
In Londonistan, humans can catch a blade from an infected pavement ape animal too. It’s a scary world.
4
Just to make one small point. We realised a while ago that in Tesco sometimes it is actually cheaper to buy smaller quantities e.g. it’s quite usual to find two 100gm chocolate bars cost less in total than a single 200gm bar. Sometimes the difference is very significant and applies even when the larger quantity is being pushed as a “bargain bag” or whatever.
3
Noticed that myself, arfur.
Younger takes me for a big shop on Saturdays. We go around doing the “weight per pence” check on ANY item that has a huge special offer sticker, never fails to amaze me how folk can be so dumb.
Just back from a visit to Poundland, 4 pack of Double Decker chocolate bars £1.75, 7 pack of the same item £2.50.
Oh, let me think, which should I buy?
2
Afternoon Jeezum. I think your figures are astray or you’ve picked up the wrong example there mate. The ones in the seven pack work out almost 7p per bar cheaper than those in the four pack.
3
Afternoon, arfur.
Yes indeed, which is why I splurge the additional 75p and bought the 7 pack.
😄
2
JP – On a fixed income and limited budget, it’s good to know you’re focusing on the essentials of the food pyramid – Cadbury’s Double Deckers. LOL.
6
Good evening, IY.
Just because I’m on a limited income doesn’t mean I can’t have a treat now and then, and with my limited appetite a chocolate bar sometimes is the total amount of “food” I have all day.
It’s not through necessity, it’s through choice. I simply can’t eat much.
I can’t abide fruit, love vegetables, but sometimes I just can’t be bothered to cook, so go for a quick energy option.
Plus, I have a Lass, rising 16. Do you know how much refuelling teens take?
3
No food wasted in our house.
Any leftovers from us and the dog go in the fox bag.
Half ten i put it under a tree outside the house,
Vixen appears.then this years cubs.
11pm not a crumb left.
2
I’m with you i live alone also, and i’m sick to fucking death of throwing bread and veg out. I could get smaller loafs but the one i like is a large one. Pointless.
I don’t eat ready meals but i don’t half eat a load of shite. Pies Pies and more Pies.
1
Well I’ve had a lovely meal of salmon, vegetables and rice JP.
I’m not a bad cook when I try.
Just thought you might like to know
3