People Who Have Jobs In IT Who Shouldn’t

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OK I admit it. I’m an academic snob. I believe that if you don’t have a degree in Computer Science (like I do), then you shouldn’t be working in IT. There, I said it. There are a multitude of reasons for my beliefs, chief among which includes studying computer technology at an advanced and detailed level trains your brain to think in a certain way. You are taught to become very disciplined, analytical, logical and detail orientated. Essential skills to perform well in an environment which absolutely depends upon binary precision. Something either works or it doesn’t. A server is either up and running or it isn’t. Something can either be accessed securely or it can’t. And so on.

Thus, I present 3 concise examples of fuck brained half witted retardedness implemented by people who very obviously have no idea what the fuck they’re doing and yet (presumably) still have jobs in IT.

1. Bank.
My bank launched (badly in my view) a new website recently and introduced Two Factor Authentication (2FA). You know the kind of thing. Enter your username and password, then their system sends you a code via some method, you enter that code and you get logged in. They did this presumably to make access to your account more secure. Great! However, every time you successfully login you’re challenged to either register your device or decline doing so. Registering it means next time you won’t have to navigate 2FA. Hold on, didn’t they introduce 2FA to make logging in more secure? How come you can get around that? Cookies. Yep, register it once, never clear your browser’s cache, cookies or traces of browsing history and you too can login to your bank account less securely. Registering your device, then running a clean up job after you finish browsing (like you’re supposed to because that’s the safe and secure thing to do) has the same effect of not registering your device at all. So you’re asked if you want to register it next time (and every time) you login. Fucking idiots.

2. Accountant.
After preparing my tax return, my accountant’s website allowed me to sign the document electronically. I logged in (username & password but no 2FA), looked at the return which includes all kinds of sensitive information including my Social Security Number (SSN). I signed in 2 places and thought that would be the end of the matter. Nope. Before I could click the Submit button I was challenged for my SSN. The same SSN that was clearly displayed on the previous screen. I clicked the Cancel button because providing the SSN at that stage made zero sense. Nope. Submit won’t work unless you provide the SSN. As insane as that was, I was then challenged to 3 further questions about partial first line of address, then my cell ‘phone area code and finally my zip code. WTF? If the fucking moron who designed this workflow actually had a functioning brain cell, wouldn’t they have positioned these security challenges BEFORE displaying the tax return? If someone had hacked my login account, they already have access to the sensitive information so in what universe does it make sense to make the legitimate account holder answer security questions AFTER the fact? OMG!!! Dear Lord, why is that not obvious?

3. Mortgage Company.
Accessing your mortgage account online should be a safe and secure activity, right? I mean, these cunts know a lot about my finances and have my SSN on file so it makes sense to access their site as securely and safely as possible. Updated browser? Check. Good browser security settings? Check. Complex password? Check. 2FA? Check. VPN? Check. Oh wait…their website doesn’t work if you access it via a VPN. Hold on…they have password complexity rules for security. They employ 2FA for security. But if I have the audacity to encrypt my network traffic via a VPN connection, they don’t allow it? What cunt made that decision and what solid security protocol was that decision based upon? What a dickhead!

So there you have it. Three fine examples of decisions and designs made by people who work in IT who shouldn’t. That’s not to say people with high academic IT qualifications are infallible or people without cannot operate at a high level of proficiency. However, having the formal training and education should go a long way to ensuring you can do the job properly. Hence, I’m willing to bet the fuck-brained decisions and designs referred to above came from people who have neither the education, training, experience, skill or know-how to justify their job titles.

What IT related shit-brained cuntitude have you run into?

Nominated by : Imitation Yank

89 thoughts on “People Who Have Jobs In IT Who Shouldn’t”

  1. Well, as Prince George says to Dr. Johnson, who is explaining the finer technical points of his dictionary in Blackadder III, “I’ve no idea what you said just then, but it sounds damned saucy!”

    Reply ↓

      • Indeed Cuntemall!
        I’m anaspeptic, phrasmotic even cumpunctuous to have caused you such pericombobulation.
        Blackadder II/III/IV’s entire scripts are seared into my brain.

      • Ho ho, I like to say that to my Polish work chums when they butcher an English phrase in an amusing way.
        Only in friendly jest, of course.
        Their English is usually excellent.

  3. I learnt everything I know about computers and computing from the superb documentary ‘Swordfish’, starring John Travolta. a result, I can access any government security programme, even when having my dick sucked by a hot blonde bird.

    Reply ↓

    • That made me chuckle, Twenty.

      Computers in movies and on TV are almost always represented in a totally unrealistic way.

      Hacking is a good example. Yes, there are password crackers which under very specific circumstances can be effective, but generally speaking hacking starts way before a spotty Chinese teenager fires up their PC in their mum’s basement. Information acquisition is where hacking starts. Finding out as much as you can about your intended target is the basis of successful hacks. That doesn’t make for good drama so doesn’t work on the small or big screen. Much better to have a blonde tongue your bell end while you magically access a secure government system in 10 seconds flat with no credentials and fuck all intel.

      Reply ↓

    • I think they stopped doing that, Sammy. Political correctness and all. The final (therefore eternal) one was/is one dainty little filly name of Dylan Mulvaney, I believe.

      Reply ↓

      • I was one having a laugh, Cuntemail. I think Lana Turner was the last, also the Sweater Girl. If you haven’t heard the latest, the cunt you mentioned is a bloke and always as been. Hope suicides on the cards for that twat after the law now states biological women are the only females since nort plonk.

      • oh my! 🤔

        Theres an interesting nom in the nom page since 6:30 this morning, Sammy. I don’t think you’re going to like the goings-on that got it written … you might want to sit down before having a look …

      • Thanks Cuntemail,
        Can’t see that common sense being jugged again after letting it slip by complete idiots, who ruined people’s lives.

  7. I think the root of the problem IY is the fact that demand for people with IT skills at any level far outstrips supply. My career in IT was as a hardware engineer and I saw evidence of this problem all the time. Examples; I was often called on to give telephone support to junior engineers. I advised one guy he needed to make a soldered joint. He said he didn’t have a soldering iron. I told him to go buy an iron and solder and claim it on expenses. Silence. When I asked what the problem was he admitted he had never soldered a joint. I was talking to another who was checking impedance on thin ethernet. At one point he said he had a reading of 50 ohms. I asked him whether he had the meter set to ohms or kilohms. In an exasparated tone he told me he had the dial set on the “horseshoe” and the display said 50.

    Meanwhile we are still sending some of the brightest youngsters to university to train up in subjects which will saddle them with huge debts and be no use to them in the jobs market or to the wider world.

    Reply ↓

    • Greetings arfurbrain –

      Finally a sensible comment on my nom which I thought was clearly explained. But hey I’m an IT nerd so maybe I assume too much.

      Anyway, I think you are correct. The demand for the skills is far greater than the supply. Hence it attracts mongs who really ought not to be part of the equation. Especially guptas. Ignorant scum, the lot of them.

      The IT industry though is so full of shit too. The explosion in demand for new applications/systems (dating back decades now) could not have been accommodated by any development methodology, but oh no – let’s blame the traditional waterfall methodology and replace it with Agile. Or as I like to refer to it, ‘ignorant cunt developers making it up as they go along’.

      Last week I was forced to do some SRE ‘training’ (listening to some gupta from Google drone on and on and on for 4 hours isn’t “training” but I digress). SRE – or Site Reliability Engineering – is one of the latest fads. It’s all about automation and velocity of deployment. Erm…OK…..but then time and resources are factored in to deal with defects, mistakes and general ‘oops I fucked up’ incidents. Here’s an idea…why not slow the fuck down, do the job properly, test everything adequately and then perhaps you wouldn’t need to spend as much resource correcting mistakes which were completely avoidable in the first place? But no, let’s have a new acronym, a ‘new’ method, a ‘new’ must-have technique, market it then sell it to companies who were the same fuckwits who bought into the Agile scam – which also didn’t work and has also been widely discredited.

      2 and a bit years from retirement….and counting. Can’t freaking wait.

      Your hardware examples were amusing, slightly shocking and totally believable. Some people just cannot adapt to a situation or see the bloody obvious.

      Reply ↓

      • You cheeky sod Mis. I hope your van turns Barbie pink in the sunshine. Had to do a puff’s job anyway. with my level of physical prowess I’d be fucking useless at your job.

  10. IT related cuntitude?
    Tell me about it!
    Once had an issue loading an IT Crowd DVD.
    Put the disc in.
    Machine just made funny whirring noises.
    Fuck!
    Unplugged the machine,
    Plugged it in again.
    TWICE!
    Fucking disc still wouldn’t load.
    Then the wife suggested I eject the disc,
    Turn it over,
    And reload.
    Guess what?
    Worked a treat!
    Anyway, as you were.

    Reply ↓

    • I see the problem here, MJB.

      The firmware in your DVD player hadn’t been updated, so it was unable to detect shite discs like The IT Crowd.

      Vacuous and pointless female manager character? Check.
      Irish lout who just shouts his lines? Check.
      A suntan who attempts being pithy and fails? Check.
      Stupid catch phrase about turning it off/on again? Check.

      Eject disc.

      I don’t know anyone who works in IT who thought that show was funny. Perhaps you need to not work in IT in order to find amusement in it? Dunno. The IT nerd in The Office was spot on though. Cliched, yes but very accurate and very well written.

      Reply ↓

      • Spooky!
        That’s precisely what I thought, IY.
        IT cunts have no sense of humour.

      • There’s some truth to that, MJB.

        IT nerd humour tends to have a narrow field and appeals to weirdos like me. A couple of examples which we found hilarious at the time, but normal people probably wouldn’t.

        Example #1:
        X Windows is a brilliant windows system that has all kinds of fun features. Including the ability to open windows on someone else’s workstation. Picture the scene. Your victim is having a conversation at their desk with some unsuspecting soul and suddenly pictures of topless women start to appear on their screen. Oh how we cried laughing at the time. It’s probably a sackable offense now.

        Example #2:
        I fucking hate programmers. When one of their ilk annoys me, I change their profile in their development database to limit their logical I/O (think key strokes) to some very low number. They login, exceed their allowed I/O and the database immediately logs them out again. Rinse and repeat. The laughs I’ve had watching their stupid faces trying to figure out if they have a password problem or there’s something wrong with their keyboard or whatever. Best of all is if they come over to my team to ask for help. We’ll quickly reset their logical I/O and walk with them back to their desks so they can show us the problem. Of course by the time we get there, the issue has gone away so they look stupid for having wasted our time. So we do it again and wait to see how long it takes them to summon up the courage to ask for help again. At some companies I’ve carried this on for days, just to torture the cunt who thought they knew best and could give shit to the database folks.

        Who else would find this funny? Not many I suspect. Daft as a brush!

  13. I’ve been in IT for more years than I care to remember. I don’t think I’ve ever worked with anyone who had an IT related degree. Biochemistry, law, economics you name it but a HND in computer science is the only IT related higher education qualification I’ve known a colleague to know.

    My first manager in IT held an electronics degree but couldn’t wire a plug.

    Servers can be on and functioning perfectly well and be secure but the shitty application they are hosting can be flakey and insecure.

    It would be interesting to speak to the IT people behind the examples you’ve given, I suspect a lot of the final decisions were made by finance guys with an IT brief.

    Financial institutions are pretty transparent as to why they don’t allow VPN access.

    Having a degree is great but it doesn’t necessarily mean someone can transfer their academic prowess into useful frontline skills.

    Reply ↓

    • A very fair and measured comment, 6DV. Thanks.

      You make a key point with this:

      Having a degree is great but it doesn’t necessarily mean someone can transfer their academic prowess into useful frontline skills

      You are absolutely correct. I’ll say a couple of things about that.

      First, at least over here in Yankland, there’s an entire industry focused on diminishing the pursuit and acquisition of degrees. It’s referred to as ‘the paper ceiling’. It’s basically a movement to help people too thick and/or lazy to pursue higher academic qualifications and still feel good about themselves. It’s funny to me that the vast majority of people who have a problem with degrees are the same people who don’t have one. Bless. Let’s not forget that Americans start to ‘graduate’ from an early age, e.g. kindergarten. Hollow meaningless ‘achievements’.

      Second, obtaining a degree in an IT related discipline isn’t the only way to acquire the necessary skills to perform an IT job well. However, it’s not a bad way to acquire and train those skills and I’ll wager a darn site more effective than alternative methods.

      Something else you said caught my eye:

      Financial institutions are pretty transparent as to why they don’t allow VPN access.

      I did some research to find out why and found this :

      https://cybersynchs.com/why-banks-block-vpn/

      I think the person who wrote it is full of shit. Here’s why. Any security protocol which either inhibits or prevents a legitimate transaction is, by definition, a failure. A VPN neither encourages or prevents fraud. Anyone claiming that it does is seriously unwell. You either have the credentials for an online account or you don’t. If you don’t, trying to use a VPN doesn’t magically provide the correct credentials allowing you unauthorised access to someone else’s account.

      Financial institutions have only relatively recently started using 2FA for online access, but they’re so concerned about your security and protecting your online accounts. Really? 2FA has been a thing for a very long time, so why weren’t they using it 10+ years ago? It’s a bit like credit card companies who shutdown your card following an iffy transaction…to protect YOUR account. Nope. Most CC agreements have zero liability for fraudulent transactions. So shutting down your card protects THEM not you. Again, financial institutions being full of shit.

      As it happens none of my CC companies block VPN access. Neither does my bank. Only my dumbass mortgage company. Cunts. Cheers – IY.

      Reply ↓

  14. A nice Indian chap phoned me the other day to say my computer had been hacked by an Indian chap so I gave him all my bank details to sort it out then another Indian chap phoned from the bank to say my balance -£4000 today.

    Do anyone suppose they are fully I.T trained?

    I must say yes,they were very professional indeed.

    Reply ↓

    • Always wonder how these Paki phone monkeys get our numbers from, Tez.

      The latest one being some Char Wallah going ‘Dis is Amazon Prime. We have lifetime offer for you izzineh.’ Then they babble on about ‘my’ Prime account.

      Only thing is, I don’t use Amazon Prime and never have.
      Scamming fucking apes.

      Reply ↓

      • I had the double whammy one day, Norman .. African accent on the line, claiming to be calling about my amazon prime (nope!) in conjunction with my revolut (nope!) … so – the only time in my life – I 100% confidently and assuredly used that good ol’ 6 letter ‘n’ word as a direct insult in the correct setting. Doubly so, really, .. a coloured person specifically acting the blaggard.

        Felt good, gotta be honest! (I gave it a bit of volume as well, for good measure).

        The people walking by me at that moment in the street seemed a bit taken aback, though. 🙂

      • Every fucking website that demands your mobile number in order to “pass Go” don’t want it to check your order arrived or ensure you are happy with their service..

        The cunts just sell it to every third world set of crooks that have the right amount of money.

        Information Superhighway Oven.

        Good health Norman.

      • I have a solution, Unkle.

        If it’s not a family or friends number, I don’t answer, simple as that.

        If it’s not in my contacts list, I mug button it to the answering service.

        If they leave a message and I want to speak to them, I call back.

        Otherwise, onto the blocked numbers list it goes.

      • Same here, Jeezum.

        If a number/name isn’t recognised on the Caller Display, and sometimes if it is, I let the answering machine deal with it.

        Fucking hate phones anyway.

      • Complete opposite… I’ll even take someone ELSES phone out of their hand to answer an ‘unknown number’ incoming call for them … jusssst in case it’s a scamming cunt that deserves an earful of abuse (for BEING a scammy cunt).

        I’ll tell ya this : they don’t call that number a second time ever.. 😊

      • Strangely enough, one of my duties at work before I retired ( at 55, ah the bliss) was monitoring and alerting fellow employees to internet/email scamming, and I always urged people to pass the info on to make sure friends and family didn’t get sucked in.

        My best advice then, and now, is this.
        Other than your doctor, dentist or vet, no one honest does business by phone. Hang up, if they ring you.

    • Funny one, Unkle.

      It reminds me of the spam email conundrum. It pisses me off no end that instead of actually dealing with the problem at source, the IT gods instead invent spam filters to (try to) detect and delete spam email. Cunts.

      It is reckoned almost half of the email sent every day is spam. That’ll be about 175 billion emails. Daily.

      https://www.emailtooltester.com/en/blog/spam-statistics/

      Here’s a novel idea….track these emails, find the cunts doing it and break their fucking legs. Some governments whine and complain about climate change. Imagine how much power is consumed world wide creating, sending and processing spam email every single day. And it’s utterly wasted. Many of these spam emails are advertising the goods and services of well known businesses. The spammers are not doing this for fun. They’re being paid to do it. Here’s an idea….fine these companies into oblivion.

      Reply ↓

      • Cheers, Tez.

        I re-did all my IT qualifications around 2015. My teacher was a fierce and ferocious lady from Hong Kong. She didn’t like knobheads or lazy cunts and she took no shit. But, she ate out of my hand. I did the ECDL Levels 1 and 2, because I’d been in teaching jobs in the past and I thought they might come in useful.

  15. I don’t have a degree in it. That’s because I was inventing it back in the days when there was no degree to have. That’s why I’m not an arrogant cock end who thinks anyone without a degree is some kind of fucking amateur.

    Reply ↓

  16. Old, but chortle-worthy …
    “WordPerfect® Technical support; may I help you?”
    “Yes, well, I’m having trouble with WordPerfect.”
    “What sort of trouble?”
    “Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.”
    “Went away?”
    “They disappeared.”
    “Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?”
    “Nothing.”
    “Nothing?”
    “It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.”
    “Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?”
    “How do I tell?”
    “Can you see the `C:>` prompt on the screen?”
    “What’s a sea-prompt?”
    “Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?”
    “There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept anything I type.”
    “Does your monitor have a power indicator?”
    “What’s a monitor?”
    “It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it’s on?”
    “I don’t know.”
    “Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?”
    …..”Yes, I think so.”
    “Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s plugged into the wall.”
    …..”Yes, it is.”
    “When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?”
    “No.”
    “Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.”
    …..”Okay, here it is.”
    “Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into the back of your computer.”
    “I can’t reach it.”
    “Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?”
    “No.”
    “Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?”
    “Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle-it’s because it’s dark.”
    “Dark?”
    “Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.”
    “Well, turn on the office light then.”
    “I can’t.”
    “No? Why not?”
    “Because there’s a power outage.”
    “A power outage? Aha! Okay, we’ve got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?”
    “Well, yes. I keep them in the closet.”
    “Good! Go get them and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.”
    “Really! Is it that bad?”
    “Yes, I’m afraid it is.”
    “Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?”
    …
    “Tell them you’re too stupid to own a computer.”
    🤯

    Reply ↓

    • Back in the good old days before Windows (yes, I’ve been doing this crap for that long), we all ran DOS programs where you started from the good old C prompt, C:\>

      I worked at a company who had a bit of a prankster in their ranks. He had this program which ran in DOS and replaced the C prompt with…wait for it….a C prompt. Except there was a difference. Every time you typed something in on the command line and hit the Enter/Return key, you saw an insult on the screen. It started off quite tame, but got progressively more profane the more commands you typed in. Best part was, you couldn’t escape out of it. The only way to stop the insult program from running was to reboot your PC.

      The laughs we had as the victim tried to work out what the heck was going on. Good days.

      Reply ↓

      • He he
        Reminds me when you could put wave alerts on the Mac.
        Were I was working we a had a an image scanning department. One the operators named Dave was not the brightest crayon in the box.
        We put the error beep to Hal from 2001 which said “I’m sorry Dave, I can’t allow you to do that”.
        He scratched his head and said it knows my name.
        Such fun!

    • E.T. The most overrated syrup drenched schmaltz to hit the pictures.

      Squat ugly long necked fucker from Outer Space teams up with irritating squeaky voiced boy. Numerous archetypal 80s cliches were born. Now seen in other American shite like Stranger Things and Ready Player One.

      Huge amount of crap sold on the back ot the film. Those revolting E.T biscuits, Garishly coloured cola flavoured shite. And cuddly toys of the alien, that looked nothing like the prune-like monstrosity in the film.

      Mind you, Dee Wallace as Elliott’s mum was a stonking MILF.

      Reply ↓

      • Evening Norman…I reckon James Cameron’s “Aliens” could’ve been even better if the Xenomorphs were E.T…
        Imagine Bill Paxton’s death being even more entertaining as he’s pulled under the floor by a bunch of wrinkled brown goblins.
        ‘Game over, man!’

      • I’m opposed to aliens on principle,
        ET, silver Surfer, David Bowie, mekons, vulcans, klingons,
        Hate them all and they should fuck off back to where they belong.

        But it I had to pick a favourite alien it’d be Mork from Ork.
        He came to earth as a manic hairy unstable bi polar cokehead.

        Offer him a chair?
        He’d sit on his head!
        Hahaha. 😅

        The fun. Never ended with Mork.
        Well,… It did.
        But I carried on laughing.

        Shazbot

      • Mork later did a film called Good morning Vietnam.
        Where for 2hrs he bellowed

        “GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!!!”

        Fuck knows what that was about but was a big hit.

        Then he was in a film where he was a elderly Scottish tranny.
        And hung around some kids.

        But what do you expect from somebody who hatched from a fuckin egg, Shakespeare?

      • In general, I’d support this obviously alcohol and drug induced rant ( you’ve been eating sprouts from your allotment again, haven’t you?), BUT I cannot thole with you including Bowie in your list of aliens.

        He wasn’t an alien, he was a supernatural!

        Fucking Hell, it isn’t hard!

      • What about ALF, Mis?

        Big time pussy eater was our Alf.

        Captured by the govt. in the final episode, I found out recently.

        Probably in Area 51 costing the taxpayer to keep.

        Maybe Trump will deport him to El Salvador.

      • I remember Alf.
        Alfs a old blokes name, most Alfs are dependable types
        Alfred the great
        Alfred itchycock
        Alf Garnett
        Unlucky Alf

        So imagine my disgust to find this one was some sort of space anteater!!

        Hairy, unfunny, a puppet,…
        Bit like Robin Williams 😁

      • ALF was ace MNC; he was a total horndog around the ladies. His name was actually an acronym:
        Aggressive
        Labia
        Fister

      • Don’t think I ever watched it Thomas.

        I would have reported the family sheltering Alf to the authorities and would of been happy in the knowledge that Alf was safely detained in area 51 and starting his vivesection.

  19. I met an idiot the other day who thinks I.T. is on the way out.

    ‘Yeah, I read on my auntie’s Facebook page about how we’re going to run out of I.T. soon. That’s why we don’t go to the moon anymore, we’ve used up all the I.T. we had, there’s no more, that’s why Vintage Cash Cow wants to buy all my old I.T. bits n’ bobs.’

    Fuck me!

    He was dead serious. He actually thought I.T. was a physical resource, like coal that can be dug out of the ground…

    I tried to disabuse him of this ridiculous notion, but he was having none of it, some nutter on the internet said I.T. was on the way out, and that’s that.

    Cannot begin to fathom the mangled thought process required to take such bollocks seriously.

    Anyway, I told him not to worry, civil war’s just around the corner, so the existence or otherwise of I.T. will soon become a moot point.

    Reply ↓

  20. I keep on waiting for the new DP.

    Is it because CuntemAll just put
    “pope” as his pick?

    Not to be critical, but ain’t it a bit like putting ” bishop” and hoping it’s Welby, because Pope Benedict (retired) is still alive, and still regarded as a Pope.

    Reply ↓

    • If there’s a stewards enquiry, I’ll proffer this, from Deadpool minus 2 (355) :

      Absurdity-peddler-in-chief Jorge Mario Frankie-baby ‘the pope’ Bergoglio …

      If the Benedict version had snuffed it, I wouldn’t have staked claim on it.

      The sulky subsequent ‘pope’ was cos the cunt was apparently on the mend..

      Reply ↓

      • Also : in 356, MNC went simply with ‘Pope’, ..

        There are thousands of bishops.

        It would be dirty pool to invoke that other notion, good sir! Besmirch the institutions good name, it would….

      • The cunt being actually 2.5 years dead is also a sticking point in your theory, JP…

      • But you bought it, daft lad!!

        Anyway, I’ve got a bridge I’d like to sell you!

      • Yeah … some cun, I mean gentleman incorrectly informed me the guy was still alive you see?

        I feel bad about aesthetically fucking up the start of (358) on the back of it, though …

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