Praise the Lord and pass out the lollipops! It’s time to celebrate the near completion of an 850 space park’n’ride facility, designed to ease congestion.
Unfortunately, no-one will be able to use it anytime soon, because there’s no access roads to or from it, apart from the construction workers temporary route.
Nor are there likely to be any built, anytime soon.
Oxfordshire County Council might just as well have spent your money on a moon launch, for all the use it is to the tax paying citizens.
Want to bet how long it will be before it’s a rubbish filled dump, with Pikea all over the place, plus a number of caravans, clapped out transits, feral kids, starved dogs and a sharp rise in vandalism, shop lifting, burglary and pet theft in the area.
Nominated by Jeezum Priest.
That looks like an anatomical drawing of the human male downstairs department.
Minus a couple of bollocks.
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And when it does open, will the service finish early evening so it’s not much use? probably.
We used to have an Empire, you know.
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I work near there. Oxford and Oxfordshire county councils are a right bunch of cunts.
Enthusiasts of lentils and faģgotry and worryingly zealous about riding bicycles and keeping cars under 20mph.
If I walk around the local village, there are orange signs for Lib Dems everywhere.
Bunch of soft, fat cissies.
And I’ve noticed a thankfully small amount of asylum-seeking nıg-nọgs in the village too, looking as out of place as….errr….well, a bunch of nıg-nogs in a country village.
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The Niggys will soon be wearing hi-vis jackets, helping you park your car.
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They look like fish out of water. Bring back the monkeys tea party’s to make them feel at home.
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It takes a very special kind of cuntitude to make even Sheffield City Council look competent
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Doesn’t it just, OC?
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I hope they have included 850 charging points
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Looks like a Chinese rip off of a Dyson ….it sucks 🈲🈳🈴🇨🇳…
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£51 million!!!!
Is it paved in gold?
No sorry that one eyed jock cunt flogged all that cash converters.
Yosser Hughes will be spinning In his grave, when they finally bury him.
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surprised it was that cheap. Had my water bill the other day – went up 30% so obviously a leak. So:
– one guy comes and tells me I have a leak (no shit)
– two guys come and dig up pavement to put in new meter and fix leak (I never asked for a new meter)
– two guys come and take away old soil (can’t be reused apparently as “may be contaminated” – well, were the fuck does it go?)
– two guys come and do some concreting
– now waiting for some more people to come and do tarmacing.
FFS – no wonder EVERYTHING in this country is so fucking expensive
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Who’s doing the tarmacing? Tarmac Adam – sorry a shit joke on the back of a shit day 🤣🤣.
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Cunning. No cunt can drive there and no buses can pick up. Green as fuck.
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To be fair,it can’t be easy planning anything these days at the council,after all they have to spend most of their time voting daily for a ceasefire in gaza so that Hamas have a sporting chance of regrouping and murdering some more people.
It’s also worth noting these excellent officials are very keen on working people using the bus,just so long as they never have to use one themselves.
Anyway it’s all been a colossal waste of money (naturally) as Super Cunt Milliband and fellow Arse Bandit Stormer will soon ban all privately owned vehicles.
It’s for our own good,now pass the expenses forms.
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It’d be great, if you could access it by road.
Oxfordshire is like it’s bumboy brother Buckinghamshire.
Full of old fruits in red jeans and slip on loafers.
Whoever planned it was too busy thinking of chewing a foreskin* to consider the practicalities of it.
* JP
Foreskins are what us gentiles have for protecting our little helmets.
Sort of a tiny waterproof roll neck jumper for a winky.
You most likely don’t remember yours.
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Oi Mis! I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you but this is the second time this week you’ve had an oblique go at me. First it was my age, now it’s the fact I live in Buckinghamshire. I may be an “old fruit” but I don’t wear red jeans or slip on loafers. I’m certainly not a bumboy as my wife will confirm and I haven’t noticed there are inordinate numbers of them round here. It’s not fucking Sussex or London you know. I also do macho things like for instance, on Sunday I fitted a new rear brake caliper on the car. So there! Also I’ve got a foreskin to which I’m quite attached.
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Haha 😂
Sorry Arfur, don’t pay any attention to the bullshit I come out with!
I’m always offending someone .
You are obviously exempt from any of my ire and insults.
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Ps
Over the years on here I’ve genuinely upset a few .
Didn’t mean to like but did anyway.
But I always sent them flowers by way of a apology.
And a lace handkerchief doused with essence of lilacs to soothe their brow..😁
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Don’t take it personally arfurbrain, the man is a menace. He saw off Dick Fiddler by accusing him of wearing red trousers and slip on loafers, his reputation as the village cunt never recovered.
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LL
Hope JP doesn’t get upset about the foreskin thing?
Foreskin envy.
He could use mine as a sleeping bag.
Wonder if you can get one reattached?
Or get a donor?
Hehehe 🤣
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Don’t worry lads, I’m really not that thin skinned and as far as I’m concerned the snowflakes who are are fair game. Keep prodding ’em!
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@Mis/arfur – JP is a good sport about all things Jewish. He let the doctor keep a small tip after the procedure.
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Mis, arfur, LL.
I have got tears rolling down my face. I think I’ve actually pulled a muscle, I laughed so hard.
Thanks, feeling much more cheerful, now.
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How about Michael Portillo’s colour choices MNC?
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Exhibit A
https://i.pinimg.com/474x/af/2d/b8/af2db8f2027371b750a51a38b7b8a197.jpg
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Wow!
Thanks, Michael. I think I can be officially registered as blind, now!
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Here is michael out with his daughter..
https://images.app.goo.gl/Z944VAw4QJJKd54g8
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He’s fuckin weird isn’t he Harold?
Funnily I was thinking that just the other day.
He was on GB news, he likes pink sports jackets or yellow,
And why does he have a blackmans nose despite being white?
I don’t like colourful clothes.
And I’m suspicious of anyone who does.
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What about men wearing pink jeans?
I won’t name him but he’s a regular on here 😁 posting his macabre fantasies.
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There’s no greater sin a man can commit iny book than swanning about like a tit in Red or pink jeans.
I’m genuinely offended by them.
It’s deeply ducky and should carry a prison sentence.
You may as well put on lipstick and a tutu.
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Only to be expected from a puff.
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/1999/sep/09/uk.politicalnews3
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Knew it.
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I haven’t seen a zoom lolly since about 1997. I didn’t know you could still get them.
When I was really young you could buy Bananaman ice lollies. I think they were made by Lyons the cake company. Tasted that weird synthetic banana flavour that was so prevalent in the 1980s but as a kid it was great because it was Bananaman.
Like a Beano version of Batman.
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You need to go to Burnham Market on a Sunday. If ye don’t wear red trousers expect to be at the end of the almond latte queue.
It’s like a uniform for toffs.
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Park and Ride is not such a difficult concept.
You park your car outside the town or city centre.
You get a bus from a nearby pick up and drop off point to the town or city centre.
Hardly fucking rocket science is it.
I take it that the actual parking area has some sort of tarmac surface so why not use some extra tarmac to lay an access road?
Incompetence like this is properly the result of over analysing things.
How many spaces do we need for disabled people?
How big should each space be?
How high should the ticket machines be to allow use by a person in a wheelchair?
How many languages do the signs and machines need to be in?
How many security cameras do they need?
How do the buses need to be adapted so that they are accessible for everyone?
How far can you reasonably expect a fat bastard to walk from a parking space to a payment machine?
All these questions and hundreds more will need to be addressed in council meetings.
It’s a miracle that anything ever gets done.
Listen you cunts.
Just build a Park and Ride.
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Fortunately I can just jump straight onto my bike and get to my destination without stopping. Mind you, they have to be short distances, otherwise I’d be completely fucked.
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Hey Sammy ,
Do you wear bicycle clips to stop your pants getting caught in the chain/oily?
I’ve not seen any in about 30year.
Bloke next door to us growing up used to wear them.
He worked at the brewery and cycled there and back whistling 😗
Nice to see someone content with their lot.
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Bicycle clips disappeared in the 1980s after flares went out of fashion.
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No Mis, I tend to tuck the inside of my trouser bottoms into my socks like any other old bloke would.
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You should get some Sammy.
Bring them back into fashion.
I always liked them.
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@MNC – he was probably too pissed to drive.
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Art, I recently had a jolly with the Girls and the Lass, in York.
We parked in the massive car park of an indoor shopping complex, free, and caught the bus from there to York centre. Return fare for 4 persons, £10.
Marvelous. Lovely couple of hours wandering around old York. Back on the bus. Wandered round the shopping centre.
Easy drive there and back.
If York can do it, why can’t Oxford?
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Sorry, cunters, can`t see the problem here.
My private helicopter drops me off and another one (already waiting there) flies me to wherever I need to go shopping – then back to the Land `n` Ride.
Thank you and I love you Oxford Council.
🥰
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Ive had a marvellous day today.
A eviction.
I always enjoy them.
The chaos, people stressed (not me.
I’m cool as a fuckin cucumber!
Not me being evicted)
Plod there, agents for the letting agents,
Nosey neighbours etc
Magical.
Sun shining, radio on in the van,
An getting paid!!
Hollywood movie star?
Get fucked!
My life’s far better.
And I don’t have to have plastic surgery.
Ker ching👍
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I had a customer, an old boy of ninety two telling me about his latest ‘companion,’ an old dear of ninety six!
All I could think about for the next couple of hours were those sex starved Galapagos Island giant tortoises that live to like a hundred and seventy.
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Hey Mis, were the cameras there when Granny Rayner was getting evicted?
Was she subletting to half a dozen bingo bongos?
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For context clearing the hip replacement backlog on the NHS would cost approx 36mil. I give up with this fucking country, I really do.
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How this got built without an access road is a mystery? No accountability means no fucks given.
Cunts as far as the eye can see!
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Terry’s oven beckons
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Terry’s Oven beckons
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I’m betting this was actually planned as a Pikey Park but they tried to pull the wool over so they told everybody it’s a Park and Ride.
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I don’t know if I have ever mentioned this, but if I ever get hold of a thermonuclear device Oxford is getting it.
Last time I was arrested. Oxford.
Last time I thumped someone. Oxford.
Last time I was chased down the road by some nutjob because I flatly refused to shag her. Oxford.
I fucking hate Oxford and don’t even start me on the park and ride bullshit where the buses stop running at 18.00 and you don’t get off work until 18.00.
Just do the world a favour and flatten Oxford.
Fucking shithole.
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Totally agree Odin. I used to do calls in Oxford regularly and my view is that if they didn’t have the university to trade on the town would be held in about the same regard as Liverpool. I would say the same of Cambridge which has fuck all going for it.
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Fucking right Odin.
Went there last year for some “culture” with Mrs C. Cunt of a journey by train from Surrey, got there it was full of gobby slọpĕs and other assorted cunts.
Mrs C wondered why I had the hump.
Never again. 😡
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Oxford is full of lesbians. 😲
There’s more fingering going on than a 24 hour piano school 🖕
It’s a fucking disgrace.
Good evening 👍
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I noticed a entrance and exit on cuckoo lane..
Cloud cuckoo land would be more apt..
Set a dozen trebuchet’s up and some mattresses at both ends..
Do a test run with some Palestinian loving students to get your eye in.
Market it as a alton towers substitute..
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This place is destined to be taken over by pie keys, over a Bank Holiday week end.
Over one day and one night, they’ll build an access road and tap into the mains and move in en masse.
The council, being strapped for cash. Having just spent it on this White Elephant, will be unable to fund a court case to evict the cunts and will instead send in benefits advisors to make sure that the aforementioned cunts are receiving everything they’re entitled to.
Get To Fuck.
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Like the Co-op Live arena fiasco in Manchester. There will be pro-Palestine cuntwipes and smelly students squatting in it soon.
You wouldn’t believe this country ruled half the world and built infrastructure like the Indian railways and roads in Burma and now we can’t even build a provincial fucking carpark or an entertainment venue for cunts to watch Ed Sheeran.
Evening Jack.
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Evening LL.
We built the modern world.
Now we’re spent and befuddled.
Like a tired old man.
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I always remember some eccentric in Oxford with a shark sticking out of his roof.
I was in the pub over the road being northern.
Allsorts of other shite in his garden.
Flamingos, a tank,
Fuckin brilliant if your not his neighbour.
Love eccentricity me.
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Did he have a cuntry cream gate?
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It should be a dogging site with the title of “park and ride “.
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Scratch and sniff ?
Good evening CV.
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To think the British started the industrial revolution, now we can’t even build a fucking car park…..!
Well and truly, “THIRD WORLD”.
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We’re only good at importing trash, we excel in it.
Welcome To The Jungle.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzr6DMcw5wQ
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Paki and Ride
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https://youtu.be/Ti7eSAI54TY?si=qW9IkO5YfxtqsPcG
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It seems like England is subject to all the rubbish we have here in The Colonies, except the Continental United States is many times larger than your damp and soggy isle. Your problems are magnified because you’ve got more trash per square mile than we do. I’m sorry; I love England. Been there six times.
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