The SNP-Scottish Greens Alliance

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Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Scottish Affairs Correspondent Ron Knee reporting. The nation has been shaken to its core to learn that the SNP’s power-sharing arrangement with the Scottish Greens has come to an end at Holyrood. I’m joined now by Lorna Slater, co-leader of the Scottish Greens, to get her view on things”

“Aye, an’ och aye th’ noo. Ah’ve allus said et, yae cannae trust thet cowardly wee cunt Humza Youseless as feir as yae coud throw ’em. Ra basturd’s dumped ra key climate change turgetts whit wuz agreed, an’ noo he’s dumped uz en oor erses. He’s chibbed Scortlund en ra erse”

“Er, hang on, why are you talking like that? You’re Canadian”

“Yer erse. Ah’m ah troo Scort, ken, mair then thet feckin’ tawser Youseless’ll ever be. Ra SNP’s feckin’ cooards, so they are. Ra traiturrs huv sold oot tae ra maist reactionary forces en ra cuntry”

“Oh come on. Everybody and his dog knows that these ‘climate targets’ were never remotely achieveable. They were totally unrealistic”

“Aye, wull, en ra Greens, we’s visionaries; we dinnae deal en realism”

“Clearly. Just for the record, who are these ‘most reactionary forces’ that you just referred to?”

“Et’s all them cunts whit drive ah car, and heat thair hames an’ cook food, an’ gae orn holidays awn planes an’ awfae stuff like thet”

“What, the Scottish people you mean?”

“Aye, them dim feckers whit dinnae ken whit’s guid fae ’em, an’ need uz tae tell ’em. An’ come tae thet, wha’ th’ feck ah youse deein’ travellin’ app here anyways, destroyin’ ra planet’s resources en ra process? *drops nut hard on interviewer* Feckin’ stitch thet, yer climate denyin’ ersehole”

“Oh Jesus, you’ve broken my nose. Somebody call an ambulance. This is Ron Knee, bleeding badly for IsAC, returning you to the studio”

Daily Record

Nominated by Ron Knee

61 thoughts on “The SNP-Scottish Greens Alliance”

  2. Ho ho, excellent stuff, Ron.
    You’ve managed to (tae?) pitch the incoherent babbling nonsense that is Scottish just right!
    Hopefully that pakı fuck will be forced to resign if parliament expresses their lack of confidence in the porridgewọg government and he’ll be out on his terrorist-sympathising ear.
    And take Khan with you back to mużland on your flying carpet.

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    • Morning TC.

      As the great Jewish poet Rabbi Burns once put it, ‘such a parcel of rogues in a nation’.

      It’s great to see what happens when they fall out, and those loonies in the Greens are now looking to bury the hatchet… right in Youseless’s skull.

      In a funny kind of way, I hope Youseless hangs on; such a lame duck is a real asset to the Union, plus the comedy value is enormous. He’s comedy gold.

      Morning all.

      Reply ↓

    • It gets better. Scottish Labour leader is also a Packer. Sister fucking will soon be encouraged and getting stoned is something you do only once.

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    • Thanks SB.

      One of the best things about this whole fiasco is that it’s revealed to the world what a bunch of loonies the Greens are.

      Given the SNP’s need for their backing to get a majority at Holyrood, it’s been a case of a very small tail wagging a great big dog. In fact you might say that the Greens became the dog.

      They’ve been a malign influence there for too long.

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      • Top nom Ron,

        sadly whilst all fair minded folks realise what utter nuts the ‘greens’ actually are….. plenty of cunts will still vote for them.

        As for Yuuseless, the quicker him and his buddy the goblin orc mare In Londonistan fuck off, the better for all of us.

      • Indeed Leonardo.

        I’ve said on here many times that where the ScotNaz are concerned, the demented bagpipes and misty mootens brigade would vote for a rotting haggis if someone stuck an SNP rosette on it.

      • To be fair Ron, a rotting haggis would make a better First Minister than the current incumbent.

  4. McUseless will probably say it’s all these whites being ray sist as he thinks he’s doing a fantastic job for his fellow Scots.
    Dump the McCunt in Gaza where he belongs.

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  5. What delicious irony that the Ayatollah’s going to lose his job for finally doing something sensible, ie
    1. Ditching the futile, unachieveable, unaffordable ecobollocks, and
    2. Stopping p*rverts going into women’s spaces and primary schools.

    As for the Greens, it would seem their primary aim is cause mass hypothermic extinction in Scotland. How appropriate then that Slater’s Co-Mental Arse Bandit Harvie bears an uncanny resemblance to Heinrich Himmler.

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  6. If Scotchland was independent all the fucking invading scum coming over the channel would go straight up to the Trossachs.

    Freedom for Scotchland 💪

    In two years it would be renamed New Pakistan.

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  7. Scotchland can be effectively twinned with Pakistan. Both countries are shitholes full of bloody useless heroin addicts.

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  8. Off the beaten track, I just want to cunt cunts who can’t act, sing, dance and are a pain in the arse because their face doesn’t fit and are given credit that isn’t due by the general public, who don’t know their arse from their elbow. Besides, don’t get me started on boys will be girls and the other way round.

    Reply ↓

      • Thanks Sam Beau. I’m an old bloke who just wants to have a bit of fun taking the piss. All the big stuff is irreparably damaged and not worth talking about anymore and will be irrelevant eventually.

  9. There`s nothing more heart-warming than witnessing the final frantic struggles of a failed public figure trying desperately to hang on to power; these cunts have no moral decency whatsoever, nor the dignity to just go away.

    Schadenfreude at its finest.

    💝

    Reply ↓

    • Morning SB…trouble is though, he’ll just walk straight into another highly-paid job at the taxpayers’ expense.
      That sort of slimy turd always seems to land on their feet.

      Reply ↓

      • Par for the course, TCE.

        For example, that non-empathetic sociopath Angela Van den Bogerd left her job with the Post Office [scandal] and is now the Football Association of Wales as its `head of people`. Which I`m assuming translates to `sacking more people` in a different role.

        Her appointment to the role was controversial, and was cited as one of the reasons for a no confidence motion in the association’s chief executive, Jonathan Ford.

      • Presumably he’ll become another Legohead, hanging on to his seat as an MSP and the perks that go with it, and turning up at Holyrood when he feels like it, which is to say, not very fucking often in Krankie’s case.

  11. Humza getting voted in as Scotch Nazi Party fuhrer was a blessing in disguise.
    Was about as close to turkeys voting for Christmas as the SNP could get!
    They’ll be wiped out in the coming general election.
    Even sooner if there’s a vote of no confidence in the Scotch parliament.
    Bet they wish they’d gone for that weird bint Kate Forbes now, lol.
    Fuck them.

    Reply ↓

    • Youseless’s shambling ineptitude has been revealed to the world. The outpouring of disdain and contempt against him (and the SNP in general) over the farcical hate crime legislation has been something to behold.

      JK Rowling giving Dumza the flamethrower treatment was a joy.

      Reply ↓

  12. He looks desperate to stay aboard the Gravy Train all right…or should that be the Tennents Express…or the Chicken Bhuna Intercity?

    All on expenses of course.

    It’s all just a big jolly to the hopeless grubby deluded cunts.

    And,as noted,how strange there are so many ragheads north of the border that are political “leaders”.

    No wonder most Scottish people are junkies.

    Good shout Ron,pitch perfect.

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  13. In monochrome contrast to Yuuseless’s racist outburst in the scotch parliament…

    Sofa adverts – Black
    KFC – Black
    Dinghy Raiders – Black
    Stabbers – Black
    Benefits Scroungers – Black
    Lives matter – Black
    Doreen Lawrence – Black
    Thick cunt Lamy – Black

    I’m sure there’s more…

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  16. Excellent stuff Ron.

    Unfortunately I don’t think it going to effect the SNP vote share too much. The Scotch Nazis influence over the media and constant anti-Westminster (read anti-English) propaganda is too pervasive, even with Youseless, Wee Jimmy and her sticky fingered husband giving the Tories a run for their money in how snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

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    • It’s become very interesting now that Krankie’s husband has been charged by ScotPlod. They must think that they’ve got a good case for it to go this far.

      The holy grail of course will be if Krankie herself gets lifted. The noose, it is to be hoped, grows slowly tighter…

      Reply ↓

  17. Full garden compost treatment for these lunatics.Once a whiff of intoxicating power and they start acting as The Furher.Madness.

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  19. The SNP have thrown away the chance to reduce worldwide emissions by 0.0001%.
    The Jockish Greens will no longer have access to the camper van on alternate weekends.

    Foolishness.

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  20. The useless park key aside, Scottish politics has degenerated into an argument over trans rights and net zero lunacy.
    That’s about it.
    All thanks to a power crazed SNP getting into bed with the insane Greens.
    And to think people vote, thinking they’ll improve local services, the economy, NHS etc.
    Devolution ain’t working.

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  22. Just watched Youseless going on about staying on as FM, to deliver ‘the priorities of the Scottish people’.

    What, you mean like gender wars, named persons, net zero and hate crime legislation?

    Here’s a hint, you cunt; people want good, competent governance, not social engineering to make them into what you think they should be.

    Reply ↓

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