Melanin Rich

Jesus wept (was he Melanin Rich?) the latest woke euphemism for the Black/White situation being aired by wokos on Al Jazeera (yes I watch Al Jazz from time to town to get a laugh out of its totally biased ant-Israeli and UK reporting) is to judge racial standing by Melanin content. IE Black people (including the Qataris who own Al Jazz) are no longer Black, they are “Melanin Rich” and the Woes of the World are no longer down to Whitey any more, they are down to those Low in Melanin.

For the elucidation of thick Melanin Low cunts out there, Melanin is a pigment found in the skin, a chemical that provides shades of brown to black and is instrumental in skin colour and the tanning process. Immediately The Laws of Unintended Consequences start to operate. The Whitey Karen on a sun bed who overstays her time can thus legitimately attend Black Only events until her skin peels.

Want to apply for Black Only Arts and Business Grants and theatre tickets or fancy appearing as a talking head on telly? Slap on the old Hawaiian Tropic and boost your Melanin cunters. Funnily enough this old punter grew up thinking it was a type of plastic popular in the ‘50s and ‘60s for making dinner ware, table tops and mugs. (Oh Melamine) All goes to show. There must be life in the dog yet because our trendy life-style gurus are in there monetizing the product:

Shanti Gifts

I suppose we shall also start hearing about Melanin Transitioning to be inclusive about our Chinese and Asiatic friends. This leads on to Melanin Theory, a racial doctrine that asserts that Whitey is inherently dumber than darker people due to lack of Melanin. The theory also claims that inter-racial couplings occur because the Whitey half is looking to get smarter off-spring with more Melanin.

Google Books

And this is a bit of fun from The Mail about a BBC journalist who gets in a Melanin froth:

All these Hot Ticket theories but there is nothing new about them. Just a product of the usual academic recycling. Back in the ‘70s it emerged from the swamp as Pigment Envy:

Washington Post

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke

53 thoughts on “Melanin Rich

  1. Very rarely see a full 100% melanin loaded bird that is gorgeous, the lovely ones all seem to have a touch of the distemper brush in them, gets rid of the bed spring barnet and feckin huge flat feet with a bit of honky in em.

  2. Benefits of a melanin rich skin:

    Free cross-channel transport service
    Free hotel board and lodging
    Free food, entertainment and pocket money
    Free lawyers and interpreters
    Free CoE false conversion to Christianity service

    • I was just thinking, Geordie (referring to your `free cross-channel transport service`) that perhaps if the intrepid dinghy sailors might like to alleviate their circumstances by plagiarising in chorus with an alternate libretto. So, to the tune of that glorious boy-scout camp-fire ditty, Michael, Row The Boat Ashore, … May I suggest: ♪ ♪ ♫ “Mohammed, Row The Boat Ashore, Allahu Akbar !”.

  3. The benefits of melanin rich skin- Chicago family gathering turns deadly after gunfire erupts; child killed, 7 others wounded.

  4. It’s obvious that those with low melanin are further along the evolutionary chain and look less like the tree swinging ancestors than those with high melanin.

    Anyone in a mixed race relationship is just delaying the process, time to ban them and sterilise the high melanins.

  5. 🎶 If I were a melanin rich man

    Du du du du du du du du dupidee doo.

    I’d find myself at the front of the queue

    For benefits and houses and a starring role in advertising too.

    Oh if I were a melanin rich man 🎶

  6. The amount of melanin in an individual’s skin is almost always inversely proportional to their IQ.
    Thankfully, darkıes are easy to spot (during daylight) and can be avoided but if one corners you, have a piece of KFC handy to throw as a distraction.
    When cornered by a pakı, two jumbo sausages held in the shape of a crucifix ought to enable your escape, coupled with flinging some shower gel on what little bit of face isn’t covered by a filthy beard…burns ’em like holy water.

      • Funny you should mention lynx. I saw the latest ad for that abomination a few days ago. I turned to the wife and said ” why would a white man buy that, advertised by grows, for grows. I don’t want to smell like a inner city grow. Lynx can fuck off” The ad of course shows a simian with a white chick fawning for his 99p fragrance. Get to fuck!

  7. Haha Cunts!

    High melanin high crime.

    Plus high stabbing,general savagery,corruption,idiocy and every other malady that we stamped out.

    Until our Great Leaders decided more blek cunts would “enrich” us.

    In reality they are a fucking deadweight round our necks,a disaster and a fucking pain in the arse.


    Fuck Off into Oven.

  8. Melanin is kind of a double-edged sword though you see. Because it acts as a natural sunscreen, having very dark black skin also reduces vitamin D synthesis which has always been understood to aid in immune system strength – except for some reason during the coof pandemic… apparently vitamin D stopped performing this vital function during that time. Weird.

    • Melanin is a defect you have some Control over.

      Take jug eared Bollock Obarma.
      I’ve got more melanin than that cunt!
      He’s sort of jaundice yellow?
      Too heavy banana diet.

      But if you want to be more melamin rich you can ‘ top up’.

      Black jelly babies*
      Black pudding
      Black jack sweets
      Black eyed peas

      All rich in melanin.
      Eat only these foods and you’ll soon be stealing the child benefit for crack money.

      * I don’t eat the black jelly babies.
      Some one told me it can get you pregnant like Katie price did.

      I segregate them out
      Stamp on em
      Set them on fire to be safe.

  9. Michael Jackson refuted the benefits of melanin. Obviously these days he’d probably do black face, which would be perverse but that never bothered Michael.

    Blowing bubbles took on a whole new meaning in Neverland.

  10. Melanin rich and brain poor. If it wasn’t for whitey the thick cunts still would know what melanin is. They’d think it was an instruction on how to eat fruit, as in open wide and shove the melanin. Well, either that or a kitchen surface.

  11. I have a pet theory that the more melanin you have, the more emotional, unstable and savage you are.
    On a sliding scale starting with the Latins, Levantines through to the Sooties who are on the whole prone to chimping out and stabby violence.
    Where’s my Nobel Prize?

    • M’Stealit : Ooga
      M’Rapit: Ooga Dooga
      M’Stealit: Eesa go Yoo Kay on um dinghy?
      M’Rapit: Meesa ave no money, no passport, no document, no skills.
      M’Stealit: Yous got many skill. You top rapîst in all Ghana.
      M’Rapit: Does we get ah heated swimming pool in hotel?
      M’Stealit: Yar bro.
      M’Rapit: Ah no can swim.
      M’Stealit: Ooga

    • I’m not sure as South Indians and Aborigines are as dark as most Africans, as are some people in SE asian. The middle east is not as melanin rich and yet full of backwards violent cunts.

  12. I won’t allow melanin in the house.

    I don’t approve of it.

    It’s on a proscribed list of forbidden items on these premises.

    Religious nuts
    Political pigs
    People without respect for gates
    Black jelly babies
    Anything french
    anything ‘vegan’
    Decaf coffee
    Plug in air fresheners
    And cheese that stinks
    ( french again)

    Melanin is contagious.
    It starts with a suntan and ends up at Notting hill carnival with a machete.

  13. I’ll take the melanin poor skin over the inability to farm or produce clean drinking water any time.

    Funny isn’t it, these people have been crying about racism for generations and the first bit of perceived power they get, what do they do? Yep, act racist.

  14. Melanin rich!
    What a fucking joke.

    Like that’s summat to do with intelligence, an ability to integrate with the host country, and not turn it into the shit hole you just left, after travelling through Germany, Italy, France, Spain, Portugal, all wartorn countries.

    Here, have my house. I’ll sleep in the shed.

    As if!

    • I believe one of ’em invented traffic lights but that’s about it.
      Fucking wow! Give dat man a watermelon!

  15. The antidote to being melanin rich is a leisurely swim in a lake of sodium hypochlorite with a breeze block tied to your head!
    Just trying to be inclusive for all you too browns out there in honky land

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