Dine and dashers


are cunts.

There are several things I really loath.

People who leave dog shit behind, especially those who bag it, and hang it on someone’s fence, or shrub.
There’s a place in Hell for you.

People who pile there unwanted items on the verges/footpath, because the rubbish fairy will take it away.

But dine and dashers deserve a special place in Hell, all of their own.

Working in this industry is hard enough, but dine and dash cunts really are the scum below the shit in the gutter.

Doncaster free press

Nominated by Jeezum Priest.

60 thoughts on “Dine and dashers

  1. I am just surprised ITV don’t make a “celebrity” game show version of it. Stacey Solomon, Carol Vorderman and Mylene Klass would be obvious regular guests.

  2. Couldn’t help but notice that your average dine and dash aficionado has a taste for expensive dishes and wine accompaniments, often running up huge bills before making off in an untaxed ringer with cloned plates that looks like it sits in a field when not towing a caravan.

  3. Gypos. But if you call them out for what they are; thieving scum who need to be used as training material for the SAS, you’re called a ‘waycist’.

    • Those people who lrave furniture outside their houses are on the same level as gýp-pos. It’s the kind of thing seen abroad in Australian neighbourhoods. A sofa sits rotting for months on end because the cheapskate turds can’t be arsed to go to the tip.

    • I hate pikey scum and what’s with the word pikey being used to describe chav scum? A pikey is a smelly looking grease ball no matter how much they try to scrub up they still look like filthy shit. As for chavs. Burn them aswell as the pikeys.

  4. Morning Jeezum, everyone.

    I was born and raised in Walsall in the 1950s. It is hardly a wealthy town and in those days of austerity it was on its uppers. At the top end of the old bus station under the glass awning was always a trestle table on which were a few stacks of the day’s newspapers and an Oxo tin which served as a till. There was no person in attendance and CCTV was of course unknown. There were always lots of coins in the tin and sometimes a ten bob note. I don’t hanker after those days, for one thing winters in our cold, damp unheated houses were miserable, but we have lost something over the years.

    • Morning Arfur!

      Quite a few farms in the Peak District still have ‘Honrsty boxes’.

      Small tin nailed up, get your farm eggs, money in tin.

      A farm we sometimes visit and park up has a honesty shop!

      A small shed structure with quite expensive items,
      Honey, handmade jams, cakes, cheese etc.

      Take what you want and money in box.

      • Good Morning Arfur and Mis,

        I use to go selling in Walsall to their saddlery and Leathercraft industries so know it well. We have lost something over the years but we have gained in diversity.
        One of our local farms had an honesty box for the eggs they sold. During Covid all the eggs and money were nicked. It wasn’t done over by locals, they knew that because it was all recorded. NFA’ed by the police.

      • There are a few ‘take a book – leave a book’ cases in people’s front gardens round my way.

        I think that is a charming idea and have dropped off a couple of good reads for others to enjoy.

        Unlikely to be stolen because the usual suspects can’t read.

  5. If they don’t all do a runner, some leave and then those who remain, and the alleged host/‘bill payer’, complain about something on all their plates and also claim that they didn’t order this and that, then they have obtained a free meal without actually doing a runner.
    The thieving gypsy bastards.

    • That’s another thing that boils my piss, Hugh.

      You ate it! Pay for it.

      Leave a bad review, but don’t make a fucking scene because you’re a scum sucking bottom feeder, when I & countless others, are trying to enjoy our meals. Whining is unattractive.

  6. I imagine they don’t even run anymore..

    What’s is our spineless police and judiciary gonna to do?
    Even if the police arrest them, the judge will drop the case over some sob story..

  7. I was in an Indian restaurant many years ago when some students tried to do a runner, but they locked the door before they got there. They told the plod that he knew nothing because you have to eat at least half the meal before you know if it’s any good. And it was crap, wasn’t it boys (talking to us). No, we replied, it’s very nice. Bang to rights.

  8. I have only been to one bar where it was expected that you paid for your drink ‘up front’.
    It brought back memories.
    You also had to stand at the bar waving your euro notes around to get attention.

    There was no waiter service.
    I didn’t go back.

    It’s almost unheard of to pay for food and drinks at the point of service.
    You just run up a tab and pay at the end of the evening.

    I suppose that shit holes where scummy Brits go would want money in advance.

    I have stayed in cities with large student populations like Granada and Sevilla.
    These places have hundreds of bars and restaurants which are usually packed.

    I have never seen a problem.

    There again, there are no Píkéys.
    They would be in Benidorm.

    • Nail on the head there Mis! We have friends in Cornwall who have been family friends for a century. Now Cornwall by many measures is the poorest part of the UK and by any measure has the lowest crime rate. One day at work I was in the county with time on my hands, gave them a ring and they said to drop in. On arrival I rang the bell a few times, no answer. I rang her mobile and said I thought they must be in the garden and so not hearing the doorbell. She replied; “No, we just nipped down to Tesco. Go in, the doors are all open.” I would add this was not in a remote rural part but in St Austell, biggest town they’ve got down there.

  9. Good nom.

    Now that there’s no penalty for thieving £200 from shops, stands to reason that same rules apply when eating out.

    What a steaming pile of cuntage this country has become.

  10. If you know where to go you will often get pinchos given to you, free of charge when ordering drinks.
    These are a simple, individual tapa served usually on a piece of bread and secured to the bread by a wooden toothpick (pincho = spike).

    You can also order tapas from many bars.
    These simple dishes will often come with a pincho in each piece that you can order from many dozens of choices.

    You leave your pinchos on your table and they will accumulate during the evening.

    When it comes to paying your bill the waiter will just add up how many pinchos you have and charge you for those.

    Some old bars use a chalk system.
    You get served a drink and the waiter will put a chalk mark on the bar in front of where you are sitting.

    Again, these marks are added up at the end of the evening.

    So why not hide a few pinchos in your pocket or rub out a few chalk marks?

    Because we are not fucking scum, that’s why.

  11. Dine & Dashers a pet hate of mine 👎👎
    What really boils my piss Pikies/Chavs who order food eat every last mouthful Then start moaning when the bill turns up saying there was something wrong with the meal ie hairs in it or something else and either want the meal for free or a massive discount 👎
    We had to endure this saga/con with a couple opposite us in a restaurant last week They ordered everything and didn’t leave a mouthful & started moaning once the bill was presented 👎👎

    • A lot of people seem to do that. A business called the White Moose Cafe became known for shaming the cheap cunts (usually fatties) who were seen scoffing food and cleaning their plates, inly to then declare the food not warm enough or similar.

  12. I remember when this used to be a ‘Hooray Henry’ sort of thing, Posh nobs out on the town thought it a jolly wheeze to run off without paying from the Savoy Grill or wherever . No doubt, back in those days, the management would have treated such behaviour as high jinx and telephoned their parents who, in turn, would pay up the next time they were up west for the theatre. Algernon and Sybil would be left to feel good about their gay old time getting one over on the peasants. Such fun! Nowadays the sportswear scum are at it and it isn’t funny anymore. They spoil it for everyone.

    Good morning, everyone.

  13. We regularly go the same pub for Sunday dinner.

    I couldn’t do that if I’d been a dine n dasher.

    I’d genuinely be mortified if the landlord thought I was a pisstaker or a dishonourable man.

    The cunts that do this are the type who will always try and take the piss.

    They can’t see things from others point of view.

    They want everything for free.

    Because society wipes their arse,
    Benefits feed their kids
    And we have a weak legal system.

    • To be fair Miserable you would make a pretty shit dine and dash.

      Being 6ft 8′ with a massive beard wearing your best Motorhead t-shirt and carrying a mortified Mrs Miserable under your arm it wouldn’t be hard to give a description to local plod and other establishments.

      • True LL.
        Not really built for sprinting.
        And anything but nondescript.

        It’s a cunts trick anyway.

        Wonder why JP.nommed it?

        Did he witness it.while having a pensioner special?

        Was he a victim of it while working in the Sheffield Savoy back in 1956?

      • He’ll love it you think he is that old.

        I think he did witness a dine n’ dash incident but in all the commotion it made him lose count of the coppers he was counting out to pay his bill.

  14. A lot of the twats that do this sort of thing have ‘travelling’ in their blood so perhaps they think that fucking off without paying is merely an extension of the same thing. Whatever the case, a fucking good kicking is in order and long overdue.

  15. All the people mentioned are cunts!

    However if I’m buying McDonald’s I expect to pay upfront but if I’m dining in a restaurant I expect to be able to order and pay once I’ve eaten like civilised people do.

    If he’s attracting the sort of people they fuck off before paying it’s his problem not mine.

    • Agreed…. To a point.

      I imagine that diners are more likely to leg it without paying at a place with inexperienced, inattentive staff.

      Also, if what looks like the wrong people are ordering expensive and unusual dishes with wine and cocktails then the staff and management should be wary.

      I think that some experienced restaurant staff have a sixth sense about these things.
      But that would be in countries where being a waiter is a profession.

      In the UK most waiters that I remember were nothing more than kids or housewives trying to earn some extra money.

  16. Whether you pay or not, you do get extras especially if you’re rude. Waiters piss and bogies. Restaurants deserve none payment when forever asking if you’re enjoying the meal or not. They’d soon stop asking if you told them it was shite. A good idea for the dashers to walk.

      • I saw that cunt in action at the Devonshire arms at Bolton Abbey. Arrived in a chopper was the ruddiest bastard and gave them a shit review. Lovely place, staff and fantastic grub, fuck Winner bankrupt dead wanker.

  17. I know a large family of chavs who tried this.
    Probably shouldnt have used the wife’s debit card to book the table.

  18. Sadly the world is just overflowing with cunts of every size and shape.

    Always has been, always will be.

    Oh me.

    Still, not ALL bad news on my personal horizon. Mr Bald Krankie charged by Scotplod. Villa through to the semis in Europe. Watched Jack Reacher throw a vicious baddy out of a helicopter last night to avenge his murdered comrades-in-arms; nice one Big Man.

    Morning all.

  19. Back in the old days, before credit cards, pins, tap and go, there used to be two ways to pay.

    Cash or cheque backed by a bank card.

    I paid my bill by cheque /card. Off trots the waiter. Comes back with the bank card, and the fucking cheque!
    I could have picked it all up, but no, I’m good person, so I pointed out that he needed to keep the cheque.

    Always was a fool.

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