“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Rural Affairs Correspondent Ron Knee reporting. Today I’m in Charnwood Forest in Leicestershire, where local residents are up in arms about a plan to site a giant solar energy farm in the area. I’m joined by Mrs Brenda Tosspott, spokesperson for local campaign group ‘Over My Dead Body; No to the Solar Farm’. Thank you for joining us”
“We’re not having it, and that’s that, sure as my name’s Brenda Tosspott. The developers can fuck right off”
“But surely this is a good move, aimed at reducing dependence on fossil fuels, and helping to fight against global warming”
“Well of course we all want to fight climate change, just not do it right here in our neck of the woods. It’s the wrong scheme in the wrong place. We’re all against it”
“Isn’t the truth of it that you’re all just being NIMBYs?”
“Naturally we’ll be called that, but this is an area of outstanding natural beauty, a
haven for wildlife and agriculture, which must be protected at all costs. The fact that we don’t want our views ruined and the value of our properties affected by this development is neither here nor there”
“I see. So what’s your solution to the dilemma then?”
“Quite simple. Don’t build the bastard here. There’s another area of outstanding natural beauty about twenty miles up the road. Put the cunt there, we say”
“Quite so. Anywhere but here in your village. Thank you Mrs Tosspott. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”
Nominated by: Ron Knee
Brenda Tosspott. A Viz character if ever there was one.
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I’m going to try and negotiate with Admin to get her a regular slot on here Norman
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Great cup result for the Villa, Ron.
I really am not optimistic about Wigan tomorrow though.
For my sins. I will be going to Spotland (JJB Stadium, my arse) . But if Rashford and the rest of those fairies are in ‘can’t be arsed’ mode, then we will be in trouble.
On the bright side, it might get Ten Twat the push.
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It was Norman.
I watched the game on the box and it was, in a word, uninspiring. Took an 88 min goal to win it, but it’s job done I suppose.
I’m sure you’ll be ok tomorrow. You must win, because you’ll need to ready to be drawn at home against us in the 4th round again.
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As someone previously remarked, it’s amazing how many areas of England never have wind, or sun.
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