Brighton Beach Influencers

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What to do on the hottest day of the year? A good time to take an evening prowl down Brighton Beach to spot the lights. Usually a few signals to/from the illegals dinghies (Brighton is proudly Immigrant Friendly) or a drugs haul coming ashore (Brighton is proudly Drugs Friendly) or a few ID flashes from LGBT+- groups (Brighton is proudly…). Failing that the fiery glow of red hot pebbles from fading hippie fires (try not to step on the spaced out cunts or the hippy shit). Add to that the flickering firmament of mobile phones as far as the eye can see and there is no time to gaze upon natural wonders like the Super Moon (very prominent down here) reflecting in the sea let alone the stars above.

I know boring boring Sir Limply is on the piss again. Maudlin drunk. But fuck me there are bright searchlights springing up all over. A new phenomenon which on investigation turn out to be Brighton Beach trendies setting up their smartphones on tripods with ring lights and microphones (all available in the Pound Shop).

In short this weird breed of work shy cunts that call themselves “Influencers”. A non title for a non job. Fat slags with enhanced lips like chimps fannies flogging their on trend beauty tips online to other fat slags with….Not to forget their allegedly male counter parts with their skinny suits abd fluorescent white teeth.

Feast your eyes on the little tableau above I snapped at the groyne beside the pier. Pictures speak louder than words.

Nominated by : Sir Limply Stoke

52 thoughts on “Brighton Beach Influencers”

  1. “Fat slags with enhanced lips like chimps fannies”…Nice one Sir Limpers, line of the year.

    • Yes, I thought that was a good one too. If only I could remember such lines for later use.
      Are there any isac influencers?

      • Quite a few actually.

        Miserable has a beard grooming channel, ex-IsACer’s Vernon Fox has a podcast from his bunker in Yorkshire and Dick Fiddler gives his thoughts on tweed.

  3. They’re an unfortunate end result of modern society and social media.
    Every influencer (whatever sex) deserve to be brutally buggered by a clone army of Russell Brands, each fortified by a liberal coating of Viagra paste and who’ve each had their willies surgically enhanced until they resemble a pink, fleshy diamond-hard french baguette.

  4. You’d think the other four would try to put the beached whale back in the water.
    Aren’t there any animal lovers in Brighton?

  6. Coming up to 70, never been influenced by any cunt, always been a rebel me.
    Remember the large cheque flares? Dad bought me some, wore them once, act like a cunt never wanted to look like one.
    Fucking mullets?? See the rugby cunts are wearing them now.
    No influence at all, do what you gotta do.

    • I turned 60 last month and was gratified to notice a sudden and large drop in tolerance for this sort of shit. I fully expect a similar episode should I somehow miraculously survive to see 70 in this shit hole of a cuntry.

  7. If you believed Quadrophenia and I do,
    Then you’d think Brighton beach was full of upset mods moodily gazing at the waves.
    And the worst thing that could happen is you get beaten up by rockers.

    Turns out your more at risk from being pinned down by fruity types and 4pt of baby batter injected up your kyber!

    Then your pockets picked by dinghy scum.

    What a world.☹️

    https://youtu.be/DhLsC2FpDZk?si=K23WkIXi_wfa70nY

  8. There is a cure, Turn off Tik, Face, Twat, Inst for 24 hours and there would be a mass suicide of influencers.
    The next day would be a much brighter world

  9. I thought Brighton was full of mentally ill utterly deranged Gays and Liberal councillors?

    If its got those influence types posing like they’re at the Oscars then all hope is lost..hopefully Fenton will be along soon with his observations from at close quarters with these swine..

    Here’s some of them influencing enrichment:

    https://www.itv.com/news/meridian/2022-02-25/four-men-guilty-of-savage-murder-of-student-at-brighton-new-years-eve-party

    O v e n

  10. What Brighton and Brighton Beach in particular needs right now, is a few 000 immos to storm the beaches in their Little Boats!

    I’m sure the lovely people down there will welcome them with open arms/doors/windows/wallets. So much so that a few 000 more turn up, and then a few 000 more, to the point where over 50,000 immos are looking for a lovely caring Brighton family in a lovely caring Brighton home.

    Yep, good luck with that!

  12. The term influencer makes me so cross I get all worked up.

    I interpret influencer as follows:

    “A lazy male, female, he/she, trannie, non-binary cunt whose only purpose is to pout and ponce off others for their own financial gain”

    • Got to agree with you, CM.

      Out of all today’s terms, such as “hack” or “dupe”, influencer has the power to send my blood pressure soaring.

      To make matters worse, I’m almost blind with rage when a person is described as a “TikTok” influencer. Why do they have to qualify where the nonentity puts their nauseating trivia for viewing?

      Is TikTok better than Twatter or InstaBore? Is it a fucking competition?

  14. I see there’s one of the Sussex sea hags in the picture.

    The South coast is crawling/swimming with these beasts. You can usually smell them before you see them.

  15. ‘Turn on, tune in, drop out.’ Influencers were once a force to be reckoned with – Charles Manson, David Koresh and the daddy of them all, Jim Jones. Now they appear to be useless wasters who lack real purpose.

    • They dont have much of a future. The Sea Hag will be up in a council house in Whitehawk with three brown kids and two white.

  18. I preferred seeing the nostalgic portrayal of Brighton shown in Graham Greene’s 1948 film noir thriller, “Brighton Rock”.

  19. I am also on a daily journey
    Each dawn awakes and new tasks await
    My blog doesn’t involve content
    It merely consists of sorting out my work
    Finding the handiest place to park
    When completed and exhausted on the odd occasion
    I realise there’s fk all food left in the house
    No chipper near me worth its salt
    Lildl is a close stroll though
    I lower my standards occasionally
    Spiritual it is this journey, that I be familiar with suffering.

    Id get at least 500 hits on the tube if recorded

  20. What a bunch of smug, self entitled d*ckw*ds. Alas, we’ve probably left it too late to get the lid back on wokeworld. One small mercy – they only get interest from their own r*tard*d peers. Keeps them busy away from the real world. Until we can be bothered to gas them all.

  21. More like influenza.

    I’d rather have a dose of influenza than indulge one of these blue-haired, pierced, tattooed land whales with a fanny like a hastily put together Grand Big Mac.

    • That’s one of the best things I’ve seen in a long time, FF.

      I think only the sight of the Hoc ablaze, with all exits boarded up, would amuse me more.

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