Pure Cremation Adverts

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Pure Cremation adverts on the telly. These cunts are all happy go lucky, all on the piss like they’re having a pre death party. I’m all for cutting out those money raping cunts, namely funeral directors but fuck me these adverts are something else. Who the Fuck has a good piss up because they’ve sorted out that after they’ve snuffed it they’ll be chucked on a bonfire like Guy Fawkes on bonfire night.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXVZaQyq6J0
(Video link passed on by Night Admin – NA)

Nominated by DLP

61 thoughts on “Pure Cremation Adverts”

  1. Whatever the situation with these types of funerals, I just hope it’s ‘plant-based’.

  2. Can’t stand that smug media-whore Vorderman trying to look sincere on the Sun Life funeral plan advert. No one actually needs one. It comes out of one’s estate and if you’re penniless ,tough shit.
    Anyway if the overpaid plastic fat-arsed has-been is so fucking bothered she is welcome to pay for my funeral. Perhaps she’d throw in a blowjob on my deathbed as part of the package.

  3. Actually, I’m all in favour of this sort of thing. Although I fully intend to live forever, I don’t see any point in wasting cash on a lavish send off. I can’t stand most of the grasping n’er do well cunts that make up my family so I’ve made a living will that states should I fail in my attempt at immortality then just chuck me in the oven and ditch the ashes near the sea, and upwind of Cliff Richards colostomy bag!

  4. Cremated? I want to be fish food.

    Just load me into a deck-mounted trebuchet and catapult me into the ocean

  5. I’ve always wanted to be chucked in a skip, like an old piss stained mattress.
    Annoying as the ad is, it makes more sense than the over 50s plans, who the fuck wants a free pen or a pair of fucking binoculars.

    • Always makes me laugh when I hear the commercial voice over say “Sign today, and we’ll send you this stylish pen absolutely free as a token of our thanks”. Token our thanks? Stylish pen? Send me a fucking takeaway or a couple of nights in a Knightsbridge hotel you tight cunts!

    • Why wait till you’re dead to experience that? If I were you I’d walk till you find a skip, then take a run and launch yourself into it. Preferably do it while people are watching. It will give everyone a big laugh and you will be happy that you’ve had a life before death experience!

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