Beggars & Tight Bastards

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Beggars are cunts.

Our high street is full of beggars lolling in shop doorways, making the place look like a giant doss house. I find my self having to cross from side to side to avoid their put on, whimpering refrain ‘Spare some change, please’ We all know that they are organised scammers with an aversion to fucking soap. They also frighten old ladies and small children.

Some cunt told me that they may have hi-tech equipment hidden under their stinking bedding that can clone credit cards if you get too close. I din;t know if this is true but I wouldn’t put it past them.

I am a generally tolerant sort of chap as fellow cunters will know, so I sometimes give to buskers who strum a tune that I recognise, or can do balancing on their hands, or perhaps juggle competently. However, cunts who expect something for nothing can fuck off. Do a fucking dance or something, just don’t expect my hard earned cash for doing jack shit.

Fuck off.

Nominated by: Twenty Thousand Cunts Under the Sea

and this from Cuntstable Cuntbubble

During lockdown I have taken up begging to make ends meet. My wife drops me off in the 4x 4 round the corner from where I slump in a doorway. A miserable wretch of a man. Most people walk by. I get the occasional coin and by the end of the day I can clear about £75. Not much to show for a hard day’s slumping but needs must as they say.
However, there is one cunt who zigzags down the highstreet and if he inadvertently passes me expects me to fucking Riverdance for a measly 50P, the tight fisted twat.
Worra cunt.

65 thoughts on “Beggars & Tight Bastards”

  2. Admin, Any chance you can shoehorn in another five or six noms a day just so I can blink and miss even more!

    It’s a bit of a balancing act. Some noms get plenty of momentum and have comments added throughout the day. Other noms don’t seem to catch fire in quite the same way. We never know which will be which. Too few noms and the site will seem stale pretty quickly. Too many and they fly by without you lot having a fair crack of weighing in. Plus we have a good sized backlog at any given time which we need to get through. The nominators want to see their nominations come up in a reasonable amount of time, otherwise it’ll seem like it takes forever for them to see the light of day and that’s how people will lose interest in making nominations. The number of up ticks suggests some feel the same way as you, so I’ll hoist this up the Admin Mansions flagpole and see if anyone salutes. Can’t say fairer than that. – NA

    • It’s like the NHS backlog of cunts. Get clapping like some retards.

    • I think the number of posted nominations is bob-on. And the variety is perfect-something for us misogynists, racists, homophobes-everybody!!!
      Well done 👍

    • Don’t pay too much attention to my sarcasm, NA. It was a bit tongue in cheek, although I have missed a few noms lately due to the speed of the following one.

      I don’t want to rock the boat either so don’t mention anything on my behalf as last time I got a dog turd (hope it was a dog turd) sent through the post and a picture of an eye in a triangle on the package.

      Refreshing to have a site where you can vent and no one is sticking a hand out for a PayPal donation too. Keep up the good work.

    • Love this site, long may it continue, a real sanctuary against all the woke and pc bollocks in the world, thanks admin, and much respect to all admins! Sid.

  3. I’m not quite sure about this cunting.
    Mrs Cunter visited England a few years ago. Stratford to be precise.
    She said that in every doorway of the Westfield shopping centre there was someone sleeping rough after the shops had shut.
    She noticed that none of them were ethnics.
    It wouldn’t surprise me that some of the homeless people were ex forces, abandoned by their country whilst illegal immigrants are put up in 4 star hotels.

    • Dont worry yourself. Living in Hackney down the road I can tell you they are all Polish.

    • Artful: currently 30’000 plus ex servicemen and women homeless in th UK.

      Truly a national disgrace.😢

    • Actually, I have to agree with Mrs. C
      It’s sometimes hard to tell, but once you’ve scraped some of the dirt off, they are 99.5% white.
      I demand BBC investigate, immediately, why predominantly white males are sleeping in shop doorways.
      Are they denying other ethnicities the right to sleep rough?
      Shame on them!

      You couldn’t make it up, could you?

  4. Got any spare change mate?
    How the fuck would I know, I’ve not finished living my life yet.

    Any spare change mate? Not eaten for three days.
    Well, force yourself. Cunt.

    • Saw some bint begging outside Tesco in Cardiff. She ate about 2/3rds of the sarnie, threw the rest/crusts to the bloody pigeons.
      As for spare change, since the Lurgy has been upon us, I just swipe the card to pay, in any case.

  5. Never saw beggars as a kid in the 70s, think people had more self respect then?
    I give them nowt.
    If asked if ive any spare change just say yeah, and keep walking.
    Fuckin smackrats, piss pots,
    Lazy cunts and nutters.
    At least buskers are trying to do something, theyre like the middle class of the scavenger world.
    Give em nowt, like.

  6. Cardiff is loaded with these cunts, I’m sure there are more tha a few who fuck off home in their Merc at the end of the day, the rest just use the money for heroin or white lightning cider, so they can mugg you later and make wimmin feel unsafe.
    Great nom 20,000 and great 2nd constable, I nearly chocked on my antifreeze laced gallon of Carlsberg special brew before going in to town to start my shift after I pitch my tent and roll around in the front garden…. Any change so I can make my life better….. WTF do you mean no you gobshite cunt, I’m gonna rape your dog and steal your mrs.
    Or my personal favourite,,, I don’t want a fucking sandwich you cunt, that won’t help me add the boxing to my Sky sports package and have the extended service done on my Merc, you cunt, cash only cunt or I’m gonna fuck you up and steal your trainers……

    • Can confirm, round my way (Shitty Road and Albany Road), shed loads of rough dooshkas and Stanley’s. However, to avoid giving money to the latter for kebabs, I have found a couple of superb genuine Greek eateries about 10 mins walk up Whitchurch Rd.

  7. Tommy Cooper was notoriously tight fisted, but when asked for something for a cup of tea, produced a couple of cubes of sugar.

    • Tommy Cooper was the master of thrifty.

      If a hotel porter carried his bags or a Dorman open the door for him he would rummage around in his pocket and would say “have a drink for later”, and stick something in their top pocket with a smile and a wink. Once Tommy was out of sight they would eagerly see what note was in their top pocket only to find a tea bag!

      Tommy also had the eternal cigarette packet. He carried around a cigarette packet with just one cigarette in it. In a social gathering When he wanted a cigarette or thought it was his turn to flash the ash He wouldn’t pull out his one cigarette pack and go to offer everybody one only to look embarrassed and forlorn. There was then a huge rush from the people around him getting their cigarettes out and saying ‘please Tommy have one of mine’.

      • I knew plenty of cunts who would decant 2 or 3 fags from a 20 pack, into a 10 pack size packet. The same cunts who disappear when it’s their round.
        Embarrassing behaviour indeed.

      • George Orwell mentioned this one-cigarette trick in one of his novels. I dare say he’d used it for real.

  8. The greatest beggar I ever saw was a man with no legs busking at Christmas on Oxford street. His scam was playing a penny whistle with no tune. £1 every other second. Genius. Saw him getting into a black taxi after he got bored. No wonder the fuckers are crossing the English Channel.

  9. Our town centre has become a giant dosshouse. It’s scary to go there in daylight, never mind evenings.
    Not that I go there currently, it’s boring as fuck and full of pound shops, boarded up shops & charity shops.
    Not that any of them are open, anyway.

  10. Leeds railway station is infested with them – all against the walkway right up to the Queens Hotel, and more in the station and marching about outside aggressively begging.
    They do not need food – there are 10 places in Leeds within walking distance that will provide free food and hot drinks, they do not need accommodation – there are places they can sleep if they turn up before 5PM not off their heads on drink and drugs or get a specific referral from the people who run the food kitchens.
    They just want the money out of your pocket to fund their disgusting lifestyle, ex military you generally don’t see begging because they are ashamed – the poor fuckers just curl up in a quiet corner until they die of cold, they are too proud to beg but the frustrating thing with the ex squaddies is that they pretty much all have varying degrees of PTSD and will not ask for help until it’s way too late.
    I am not an uncaring person but it used to enrage me getting off the shuttle bus after a days graft to walk to the railway station to wait around hoping the train would turn up to be accosted (every day) by these fucking shameless leeches.
    Pay for you own booze and drugs, fucking sc*m.

  11. Some beggars are genuine, down on their luck and may have psychological issues. Some sympathy for them.

    Others are organised groups of Pikeys, Albanians and Romanians who have an organised business of begging. Parts of London are infested with these professional scroungers. They can fuck of back to their own countries and beg there, the scrotes.

  12. Same here(Rugby).Spare some change?NO.Piss off.Don’t trust them as far as I can throw them

  13. I used to work with the homeless.
    Working with the council to get them rehomed.
    It was all cunts who were their own worst enemy.
    Never had a squaddie walk in,
    Them I do feel sorry for,
    They deserve better.
    It was mostly people who are utter shite, and blame everyone but themselves.
    One I got two flats for,
    Hed brew homebrew out of apple cores under a radiator,
    And give neighbours hell.
    He seemed happier homeless.
    I lost my sympathy for the homeless pretty quick.

  14. I give fuck all to anyone on the street. But give monthly to the Legion, in the hope that it will get some ex squaddies off the street and in memory of my old man.
    I personally think it’s a fucking disgrace that we house and feed illegal immigrants, yet tolerate the many, many ex service personnel sleeping rough.
    It’s about time this country got its priorities right.
    Good evening.

  15. Mrs Stroker refuses to go into our local shopping centre (which I visit roughly on average once every 3 weeks) as I have over time become less reserved and now reply with a loud “fuck off” to all beggars and Big Issue sellers.

    Also groups of loud and shouty Eastern Europeans get similar treatment.l with a equally loud “shut the fuck up”.

    Perhaps I am considered as rude, ill mannered uncaring but frankly don’t give a fuck anymore.

  16. A cunt hassled me outside Croydump station for his train fare. Gave him a few coppers, wasn’t at all impressed went off shouting about phoning his bother to pick him up. Fucking cunt was always there.

  17. Lots of professional beggars.
    A young lass with a dirty face and a toddler in a pushchair could make thousands per week, near an underground station, back in the 90’s.

    Now it seems to be extremely fat Romanian wimminz, Costa coffee and cakes in hand saying: “Big izzu pliss!”
    Fucking dirty cunts!

  18. I always take great pride in telling them to Fuck Off if they even look sideways at me.
    Brightens the day.
    The blighted rats.

  19. Also cunts are the brainless saps who give these vermin money in the belief it’ll go towards food. If only they could see them with them in the local park, fistfuls of lottery scratch-cards, after a hard day’s whining in the High Street.
    “Spare a bit of change, mate?”
    No.
    “Have a good day, mate.”
    Yes, I will.

  20. It’s a way of life over here. Cunts with a house come over and beg outside our Supermarket in a wheelchair then at the end of the day they fold it up and throw it over their shoulder and saunter away. You’ve also gotta be on the watch for dent gypsies who offer to fix the dents on yer wheels for the cash in yer wallet. Fuckers.


    (Good to see you back with us CaliAngel. Always a pleasure to get a viewpoint Stateside! – DA)

  21. I never give money to beggers.
    Only to traditional tramps pushing a shopping trolley filled with superating bags of belongings.
    I usually tell them not to spend it on food but drink instead.

    • One day Long ago a slightly older colleague passed twenty dollars to a rough looking old bloke (who wasn’t begging, just sitting there). I was astonished “he’ll only spend it on booze!” John said “he can spend it on whatever he likes”, it was a big learning day for me.

  22. Used to be a band busked in city centre Manchester that was pretty good, big double bass.
    And two old black blokes playing old blues numbers, an a blind young guitarist.
    All good.
    But on the whole its some hippy cunt doing mr Tambourine Man.
    In York remember seemed to be a lot of those living statues?
    And once a magician who did Street magic,
    He was really good.
    Gave none of them nowt.

  23. There are a couple in the high street next to where I work. One looks like Robert Wyatt – great big white beard and wheelchair bound. The cunt accosts any poor sod that happens to walk past him.

    The other is a swarthy cunt who does this strange dance like Michael Palin’s leper character. He just looks at you, outstretches his grubby hand with a ‘please, please’. Clearly a gimmegrant.

  24. There was a regular on market st Manchester who somehow balanced on a skateboard with paralysed legs which in itself was supposed to draw sympathy. He would rake it in whilst playing the accordion. Begs the question (pun intended) how did this cunt get here in the first place? Not on that fucking board that’s for sure.

  25. There’s a cunt in Bury, and he sits there with his dog. He is not homeless and he mistreats the dog and doesn’t wash it so people will feel sorry for it and give him money. If anyone fronts him up about the dog and the fact that they’ve seen him come out of his house, he kicks off and gets all abusive. The cunt hates it when passers by get things for the dog (beds, chews, biscuits) instead of giving him cash, because the cunt is a rampant spice head. The scum de la scum.

    • The dirtbag outside m&s Prestwich was mugged last year.
      200 quid taken according to the other more pleasant beggar outside Aldi. Honour amongst thieves my arse.

    • RSPCA (an organisation I will get around to counting), get hundreds of millions in donations-report him and his type to them.
      Of course they prefer to use what’s left of their finances to lobby against legitimate pest control and shooting sports 👎

  26. Unless theyre ex squaddies id round them up and gas them.
    The living statues too.
    And mime artists.
    They could be the warm up act before the gyppos and the carpet kissers.

    Im off for a wank.

  27. I remember when Big Issue sellers were white and British.
    Now every Big Issue seller is a P@k! woman who ‘no speaky Engerlish’.

    • Some are Romanian. There’s a chubby one outside our W H Smith who flogs that rag every single day. If you’re there at 5pm you can watch her being scooped up by her boss in a black Merc with tinted windows.

      Two shops down there’s a poîkey beggar who has a weasel on a piece of string. He makes loads. He’s got weird, blue, facial tattoes like he’s a Maori. He’s not a Maori though, he’s a lazy, smelly, begging, bludger cunt with a weasel stinking up the street.

    • Also it was supposed to be a “kick-start”-my local dooshka cunt has been stinking up the pavement for 5 plus years ☹️

  28. Reminds me of Alan B’Stard when that homeless bloke asks him if he’s got any spare change for a cup of tea. Alan walks past him and says “ Of course I have, what a stupid question”.

  29. True story. Many years ago in Seffrica I mentioned at a braai full of poncy cunts that there was a black beggar with no legs on a skateboard at the lights in Pinetown and I always slipped him a few rand.
    ‘Oh you shouldnt do that some stuck up Yarpie cow said. ‘He’ll only spend it on drink and pornography’
    I fucking hope so I said. We were never invited back.

  30. Has anyone been to Reading? The place is full of scroungers accosting you as you walk down the street.

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