We all do stupid things in our youth, often related to alcohol.
But one thing I never did was to race around the roads behaving like James Hunt. For a start, doing so in a small underpowered car looks ridiculous. So why do modern youngsters and let’s be honest it’s mostly lads of 17-24, try to emulate Lewis Hamilton? I mean we all know what a toerag he is on and off the track.
The odds are already stacked against them; they have to pay huge insurance premiums. And plod is always on the look out for tearaways. Yet still you see them speeding along the streets, doing wheel spins, overtaking on bends, hounding other motorists.
And driving far too fast in wet or wintry conditions when they haven’t a a clue how to handle a car in bad weather. They think black ice is something you mix with vodka.
A young man tried to convince me that old people are the worst menace on the road. And yes there are old duffers who creep along holding everyone up and the occasional twit driving the wrong way up the motorway. However, the statistics don’t lie and it is the young who cause the most danger by far.
I know you can’t tell this generation anything, they already know it all, but they need to learn that driving is a skill you learn over many years and that you literally can not cut corners.
Nominated by: Lord Helpuss
Sex.
It’s a peacock display, an awkward dance to lure a suitable mate.
Silly little bastards-if they want a lo-rent mate, all they need do is stand outside Greggs, waving a tenner😂
In all seriousness, it was always so: young lads showing off-circuits around the town at night, rallying around industrial estates and supermarket car parks-bellends.
Not just kids-old farts and young wimminz now.
24
Given the lack of large Apex Predators in the UK. I believe that if you drive like a Cunt natural selection will be waiting around the corner in the form of a Oak tree or lamp post.
The latter quite handy for attaching flowers, balloons and soon to be rotting teddy bears to.
20
Yes Lindsay you can. I’d love you to spend all day bouncing up and down on me as your pert young tits dangle in front of my face. By the way, you are 18 aren’t you. I don’t want to be like a certain member of the Royal Family!
Cuntfinder General sums it up perfectly. Young men thinking it makes them look hard, cool and will attract women. Been the same since the motor car was invented I guess. It’s a penis extension.
Not until you get older that your brain cells replace what your dick’s thinking. Though perhaps with my first paragraph it still hasn’t.
I wondered how many comments it would take before our obvious ‘Lindsay’ plant would get you lot riled up. Three. Not bad. Carry on. – NA
7
A nice looking sort in the nom photo. She could handle my gearstick anytime she wanted. I’d be happy to polish her headlamps.
7
This has been going on since the late 80s early 90s with young cunts “driving” around doing doughnuts, skidmarks, redlights etc in their “souped up” Peugeot 205s, XR2s, XR3is and other cheap and cheerful rustbuckets.
But back then it was for the thrills; these days its for the likes on social media or You Tube. “Look at me and my speedo, guys, I’m doing 110 in a 30!”
I always find it quite funny when these irresponsible cunts end up dead having crashed into a brick wall. And their parents moan in the papers saying “Oh he was a lovely boy, Never ‘urt a fly. Bit of a tearaway sometimes. Am sure it wasn’t his fault he crashed into a shop window doing 90 in heavy rain while updating Shitebook on his phone, drinking a bottle of scotch and his boyfriend giving him a blowjob!”
17
If they want to turn themselves into offal by collision then good.
An unpleasant side effect is the murder of pedestrians.
The thick cunts.
9
As said the reward is a teddy from Hallmark and some dropping daffodils tied to a tree.
“He was such a lovely lad”
His feckless mum will post on facefook.
I disagree!
He was a simple little cunt and a adherent of Darwin’s theory!
Winner-Oak tree!
14
I have a very rich friend with a gobby 24 year old spoiled brat for a son.
The lad has already managed to attract the attention of the entire local constabulary by hooning around the streets in a BMW 440 M sport with a very expensive and immediately identifiable private plate.
That car now has to live in a garage until the heat blows over.
So what does spoiled brat get to keep him on the road? Something a bit more sensible? Something a bit more tame?
Nope. An AMG C63 biturbo with 500bhp.
This car now has a section 59 order on it, due to the driver revving the nuts off it at the lights to make it backfire constantly.
That car is also now retired to the garage.
I have had to sit in the car while young fella wanted to show me what it would do.
I have never been so terrified in a motor, ever. Way too much power for an inexperienced lad who drives like a car thief.
I understand that his birthday is coming up and for a special treat his father is buying him a McClaren with over 540bhp.
At this point, I had to have the concerned friend chat with the father and straight out told him that if he buys the boy that car, it will be his coffin.
If he really cares for the lad, a day of driver training at Brands hatch would be far more appropriate than a £140k sports car that will end up embedded in someone’s living room.
I seriously hope he listened. For everyone’s sake.
10
Seems to me the rich father is an even bigger cunt than the son.
7
Nah, just richer than god. Actually a nice bloke.
I have advised that a birthday present of a Ginetta G40 cup series car and a full season of racing is £100k less and far less likely to end in someone getting hurt.
It will also teach the lad driver discipline.
2
A size 12 boot up the rectum would cost him £180k less.
I would require travelling expenses.
6
@isaac
This.
4
Get him on the donor record double quick. Shit you’re on the record unless you opt out. Make sure he does not opt out. When the inevitable happens he will be able to do something for humanity make up for being an oxygen thief cunt.
3
Totally agree with this nom,
Yesterday I was delivering to a Tesco store in my truck, however after tipping I noticed I had a flat tyre , so waited for a replacement, howfuckingever , every cunt and his mate , decided to park right next to me because there was insufficient space’s, for then on the school run hense I’ll just Pop into Tesco, oh they got in ok, but could they fuck get out, unfuckingbelievable never have I seen so many shit driver’s in 1place at 1time,
5
I actually think that the young are safer drivers now than when I was young…we used to think nothing of 6-8 of us piling into a couple of knackered old cars and driving 30 miles for a disco,darts match,the hell of it..getting pissed as farts and then driving back. If we happened to knock the odd stone-wall/fence down.we’d just go back the next day and put it back up..nobody (even the local Copper) really gave a shit .
The young drivers today don’t seem to do that…they seem to drive about in little sewing-machine cars that would struggle to reach 30 mph and seem appalled at the idea of going on a pub-crawl.
No.can’t blame the young ‘uns when the roads up here are infested with middle-aged Barry Sheen wanabees on motorbikes,doddery old farts,Cunts in motorhomes…and,of course,….the dreaded pushbiker in all his Lycra glory.
11
Fucking hell Sir Fidler-that’s two days in a row you have been defending young un’s.
Can we expect an imminent announcement of Fidlerbury-a weekend of sun, fun, music and the arts on your vast estate, next?
✌️✌️✌️
6
Afternoon,General.
I remember when I was young listening to a succession of Old Farts banging on at me about “the youth of today”.
The average ” youth of today” couldn’t hold a candle to the levels of Cuntishness I managed when younger…in fact,if anything, I’d Cunt them for being boring conformists who wouldn’t know a good time if it bit them on the arse.
2
I know exactly what you mean-I am glad I had the 70’s and 80’s in my formative years-I wouldn’t swap with today’s youth.
No sir-eee Bob.
4
This is what happens when you bring up a generation with no discipline and schools are now fully signed up to the “it’s not my fault” agenda.
It was at least ten years ago now but one of my daughters teachers told her that having to eat a bit of fruit before you were allowed a chocolate biscuit was a form of “abuse”….just imagine the horrors going on in schools now with all the XYBGGDTTTYIOJCC stuff going on, add to that all the fawning over residents of warmer countries and you have the result driving round in cars.
9
Too many cars on the road. Too many people in the country. Kick all the w*gs out!
14
I think the kids aren’t as bad as when I was a teen, I had many people tell me that they would never get in a car with me again, they were just lightweights. Most cars now are front wheel drive and much more difficult to get sideways than say a ford capri or dolomite sprint. I love my transit tipper when the road is wet, if my lad (not son) is engrossed in his phone rather than listening to me whilst I’m driving I often get his full attention with a bit of oversteer on a country lane, as he clutches the dashboard and puts his phone down. Kids now are forced to take expensive insurance policies with the inclusion of a black box flight recorder which can include fines for speeding and breach of road rules. Insurance companies know where the car is all the time, how you drive and if it’s unplugged they are on the phone asking why. Maybe young drivers are cunts but nowhere near as bad as they used to be.
5
I never bothered with cars back in the day. But from memory passing your driving test was relatively easy compared to fuck knows how many tests you need to pass these days!
3
“Kick all the w*gs out!”
Quite so. Bald is beautiful.
13
I passed my driving test at 17 and almost killed myself on the way home from the test centre by trying to overtake a car. Although the manoeuvre itself was perfectly legal, I realised almost immediately that trying to do it in a 1.3l Honda Civic was, at best, ill-advised. I was never really quite so brash and arrogant about driving after that and I remembered my instructor telling me that I would only really start to learn to drive after I passed the test. Too true.
12
I found that somewhat amusing /picturing s large silver cat driving a car but hey good on ya!
1
Back when I was a “yoof” in Rhodesia, a young driver would generally drive their parents “Landy” when going out for jobs, most just shared the car which was the families pride and joy for more formal occasions with us it was the Anglia, fast forward to now to here in Blighty and the idea of borrowing the parents car is “so unfair”, I made my youngest have a “Landy”, cheap insurance and seats at least 7 comfortably, ideal!!!
11
I bought my first motorbike back in 1987 – a Kawasaki AR125. Only 12hp, but that was the legal limit for learners back then. However, Kawasaki were doing a deal in conjunction with Star Rider (a bike training centre), where your first 2 one hour lessons would be free.
So one Saturday morning I went to the dealer to pick up my new bike. They put it in a van and took me to the Star Rider training ground in Small Heath, Birmingham. And I spent two hours on a private road/circuit getting used to riding a bike, leaning into corners, emergency stops on wet surfaces etc.
This was a great help, but when the two hours ending I had to make my way back to my home 8 miles away across the city. I had no satnav, no A-Z, no nothing other than my own limited knowledge of the main roads in and out of the city.
Fucking nightmare going through the city centre and the notorious Five Ways roundabout, with me tootling and wobbling about at 20mph, trying to remember all I had learnt in those 2 hours, while thousands of impatient drivers tail-gating and banging their horns at me!
I got home, but OMG it was an eye-opener. Almost put me off biking for life. And that was over 30 years ago; I’d never attempt such shite these days.
7
A couple of years ago a 16 year old twat killed himself being stupid on a 125cc motorcycle in Hucknall. He was not wearing a helmet, pulling wheelies etc in a 30mph residential estate. It was a regular practice for this lad and his mates. Anyway the inevitable happened , he crashed into a van. The fact that he was drugged to the eyeballs probably didn’t help his vision or reactions.
Of course, he was a lovely lad etc. , bought his mum flowers just like Ronnie and Reggie. The highlight was his family setting up a petition to rename the the he killed himself on after him. Thankfully, the petition was not well supported but it does go some way to explain why the little turd turned out as he did.
11
street ffs, not even hung over today.
3
‘Young’ anything is a pile of tosswank, especially the variety that gets fermented in ‘university’ these days. Complete brainwashed nanobots programmed to do the bidding of the fourth industrial revolution.
If anyone bears forth fruit from their flaps, keep them well away from the Marxist indoctrination 5-21 camps unless you are happy for Crimes Against Humanity to be committed to them for those 16 years.
6
I’m a driving instructor and I have to report that the biggest cunts on the road are middle aged men, usually in BMWs, Audis or Range Rovers.
Driving too fast for the condition of the road, tailgating, not signalling, dangerous overtaking.
Cunts the lot of them.
13
PS why can’t I get pupils who look like Lindsay? Mine are all fucking mingers!
7
Where’s your patch Cupid?
Bradford? Leicester? Notting Hill ? perchance?
2
It’s actually North Bristol which is fairly affluent but I still seem to get mostly mongers!
4
I think it’s the same for every young generation. I know I used to. Albeit in a Mk1 Ford Escort. Now, I get paid to drive around fast, abusing cunts that won’t yield.
5
“Got a small penis?
“Don’t worry, there’s a Range Rover dealership real close”….
10
What about white van man?
Still as crazy as ever.
Sing to the tune of Uptown Girl:
White van man
I’m being followed by a white van man
And every time I look in my mirror
It seems he getting just a bit nearer
What can I do?
He’s a white van man
Tiny brain in a big tin can
And so on…
With apologies to any careful WVM on this site.
2
I’m a van driver Lord. About 20k miles a year with a clean license and no insurance claims for 30 years now. I don’t hang about but I don’t act like a cunt either.
The main thing I’ve noticed about other van drivers , even if I’m in a car is that they are the ones who will let you pull out into traffic instead of sitting across the front of you pretending you’re not really there.
3
Absolutely fucking right. I’m a motorcyclist and if anyone’s going to let me right turn across traffic it will be a White Van Man. Last three mornings, going to work…WVM every time. Good drivers too, and I try to return the favour when I can.
No complaints at all, as opposed to half-asleep old cunt speeding up only in a 30 zone; Lycra cunt on pushbike,wasting the fuel of thousands behind him; and middle-aged Polski cunt in BMW, in love with his his right foot.
The cost of insurance seems to have tamed the youngest drivers, and Darwin culls idiot bikers effectively.
My fingers remain crossed.
5
You &i now have something in common komodo nice to know eh what
1
The young ones aren’t half as bad as the middle aged fucks driving 4x4s at warp speed. Speed bumps mean nothing to the suspension or it just goes over those little cheese wedge ramps entirely.
The young ones can barely afford those mosquito sounding mopeds that can be overtaken by granny wagons.
3
“Soccer” Moms, are the worst, especially during the school run and they park their Chelsea chariots as close to the schoolgates as humanly possible so Tarquin and Jemima don’t tire themselves out walking impossible distances.
And of course if Soccer Moms can’t park outside the gates they’ll park anywhere, including grass verges, zebra crossings, pavements, ramps, other people’s driveways etc.
And you should see them try to reverse their huge 4x4s with screaming kids in the back seats and a load of junk stacked up on the parcel shelf – can’t see through the rear window, but that won’t stop them reversing at a rate of knots!
6
The cuntery of driving a 1.1litre poptart with a mahoosive exhaust pipe to make it sound souped up is the real crime here.
Fixed speed,variable noise.
Millenials, pah.
Hello,good morning and bollocks.
11
We have a cunt like that round here. Old hatchback (still not sure what), painted a dark matt purple, suspension lowered so far it’s almost scraping the ground( how is that even legal?), exhaust like a drainpipe and, judging by its distinct lack of speedy progress, almost certainly an unmodified 1 litre engine. A Veyron it is not.
6
A motoring monthly did the maths once , and worked out that a 1 litre car’s engine would have to rev to at least 400,000 revolutions a minute in order to produce any back pressure and discernible torque through a straight exhaust with a 4” back pipe.
1
Cuntfinder General is right, it’s all about immature young pricks tying to impress the girls. Little boys pretending to be men. They think everyone sees it the same way as them. They’re embarrassing, and by the time they’ve grown up, there’s always another bunch to take their place,
3
Testosterone poisoning makes young men cunts, we’ve all been through it. A bit off topic, I watched a film showing a driving simulator like one of those aircraft simulators (in Oz I think), youngsters had to drive for hours and experienced a lifetimes worth of cuntery on the road as part of their test. Seasoned the salty bastards up real fast, but was too expensive, shame that.
2
It’s not just young men. A young couple were racing at around 120mph on a 40mph road in Enfield about a year ago when the woman lost control, left the road and hit a tree. The engine travelled about 40ft down the road and she ended getting pushed into the boot. Needless to say that she won’t be doing that again.
4
Will she be doing anything again, or was it good night Vienna?
Do I really give a fuck?
2
You could always warm the fanny up with a kettle of boiling water – spout up the cunt. Once it stops steaming simply remove the speculum , and you’ve got at least 15 mins of almost lifelike action – before the rigor-mortis returns.
2
1975 I think it was.
Made the front page of the Chronicle , and the Essex County Standard.
The mortuary attendant in question was actually using the canteen kettle as well.
0
Squished to a fucking pulp
0